Chapter 9: Trainee (1)

After Yoon Siwoo’s nonsense froze the atmosphere, the car became as quiet as a tomb.

The Teacher had only been angry for a brief moment, then he was back to his usual self.

Yoon Siwoo stared out the window with a visibly displeased expression, and I didn’t bother to speak either.

The incredibly awkward drive finally ended, and we arrived at the company building.

I parted ways with the two of them and headed to the practice room where the trainer would be waiting.

The practice room had an entire wall covered in mirrors.

There, a trainer I had seen a few times before was sitting on a folding chair.

“Hello.”

She lifted her head at my greeting, stared intently at me, then spoke with a smile.

“Hello, you’re Hanasia, right? The one Hyungwon Teacher mentioned?”

“Yes, I’m Hanasia. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“I’m Yoon Heeseon, your vocal trainer. Nice to meet you.”

Of course, she treated me as if she had never seen me before.

While we hadn’t met many times, we weren’t strangers who needed to introduce ourselves from scratch.

The situation, so similar to our first meeting, felt like déjà vu, making it only awkward.

“Today, I’m going to see what level of skill Shia has. Hyungwon Teacher roughly told you, didn’t he?”

As I sheepishly shifted my gaze, she quickly began the lesson.

By the way, all the Teacher told me was to go to the practice room.

I know he’s busy, but I wish he’d informed me properly.

“No, I only heard that I should come here.”

“Really? I told him to at least tell you briefly what we’d be doing today!”

“…”

She let out a big sigh, stood up from her chair, and began rummaging through her bag.

“Today, we’ll first see how well you can sing and dance. There’s no need to be too nervous, so feel free to relax. Got it?”

“Yes.”

What she pulled out after busily rummaging through her bag was a laptop.

An expensive laptop that I could only dream of.

She placed it on the folding chair and started fiddling with it.

Seeing a yellow messenger window pop up and her furiously typing, I cautiously guessed she was complaining to the Teacher who hadn’t told me anything.

“First, I’ll give you a note, and you just follow it.”

“Okay.”

She enthusiastically typed on the laptop, then approached me with a piece of paper.

My heart began to pound with the feeling that the real lesson was about to begin.

Heeseon Teacher opened her mouth, and a calm voice flowed out.

Starting with a not-too-high note, it gradually rose by half steps.

It was an act like a warm-up, something I had repeated hundreds of times.

When I was a man, I did it without a second thought.

It should have been a routine activity, but today, I felt a little nervous.

No, honestly, I was very nervous.

How much could I truly sing with this body?

I was both excited and scared.

Even when I was at the Teacher’s house, I couldn’t bring myself to sing or dance.

I was worried and scared that it might be utterly terrible.

But I couldn’t keep running forever, so I had to confirm it now that the opportunity had come.

If it wasn’t much different from when I was a man, I could just laugh it off as unnecessary worry.

And if by any chance it was terrible, I could just practice again.

Because I decided to start over as a trainee.

Even if it was unavoidable, I had decided to debut as a girl group member.

The moment I steeled my resolve, Heeseon Teacher’s voice stopped.

I took a breath, then let out the note I had just heard.

****

Both vocal and dance lessons were finished.

I lay in the empty practice room, breathing heavily and staring blankly at the ceiling.

My clothes were soaked with sweat, but I didn’t feel bad.

On the contrary, I felt good.

I felt so good that I wanted to laugh and tease my past self for worrying.

Now that the lesson was over, I realized that the worries I had anxiously held were pointless.

No.

Even if not entirely pointless, there was no need to worry that much.

My skills had declined, but not to a serious extent.

My vocalization was largely fine, and I could handle the dance without difficulty.

Most things were fine, but if I had to pick one problem, it was high notes.

While my vocalization was somewhat decent, it became shaky as I went higher.

It felt like I could definitely go higher, but it was subtly blocked, something I frequently experienced when I first became a trainee.

Since I had already experienced it once, I knew the trick.

I could do it with a little more practice, so there was no need to worry much.

Overall, there wasn’t a big difference from when I was a man.

Except for a slight drop in stamina.

“Haa…”

I let out a sigh of relief and stretched.

I glanced at the clock; it was already past 8 PM.

The dance teacher told me to wait because the Teacher would come, but I wonder when he’ll arrive.

As I stared blankly at the ceiling, I suddenly felt eyes on me.

I turned my head and saw people staring intently through the glass door.

Four women with brightly colored hair.

At the familiar sight, I instinctively shot up from my spot.

“Ah, hello!”

I bowed deeply to them as they gently opened the door and entered.

They were the girl group Eve, three years into their debut.

They had swept all domestic real-time popularity charts right after their debut, and their popularity hadn’t waned yet.

To me, someone who hadn’t even debuted, they were distant beings.

I had seen them in the practice room occasionally, but this was my first time meeting them face-to-face.

Because of that, I was incredibly nervous.

So much so that my hands were sweating.

“Hello, did we perhaps interrupt your practice?”

“No, I was just resting!”

I quickly shook my head and replied to the words of the leader, Lim Yuri.

She kept smiling, as if something was incredibly amusing.

It was a smile that made you feel good just by looking at it.

“The Teacher asked us to deliver a message, so we came.”

“A message?”

“He said the recording is running a bit late, so please wait a little longer.”

“Ah…”

‘The recording isn’t over yet.’

‘At home, he’s a bit of an old-fashioned uncle, but when it comes to work, he’s a perfectionist.’

‘He definitely won’t finish until every single minor detail is to his liking.’

‘I wonder if I’ll be able to go home today.’

“Thank you for letting me know.”

I bowed 90 degrees once more to the seniors who had gone out of their way to deliver the message.

However, I thought they would leave after encouraging me to work hard, but they just kept staring at me.

‘Do they have something else they need?’

“And while we were at it, we came to see our little sister.”

“Little sister…?”

“Yes, our little sister. She’s the one the Teacher picked, right? Then she’s our little sister.”

When she said “little sister,” I wondered what she meant, but it seems she was referring to the setup where the Teacher brought me in as a trainee.

‘This is why I said we shouldn’t add weird settings…’

‘No matter how I think about it, this setup, where I caught the Teacher’s eye and came all the way to Seoul, has too much impact.’

‘For a typical trainee, gaining this kind of attention would be a dream, but I’m not a typical trainee, so it’s a bit uncomfortable.’

‘Even though it’s a profession that thrives on attention, and being in the spotlight like this should be a good thing.’

‘Because I’m someone who became a girl due to TS disease and then became a trainee again.’

‘I prematurely get scared, wondering if they might know I was a man.’

‘To be uncomfortable with receiving attention when I should be craving it more than anyone, even I think I’m being ungrateful.’

“It’s the first time the Teacher personally brought in a trainee, so we were quite curious, but he really reeled in a huge rookie!”

“H-Huge? I’m still a long way off…”

‘To be expected by people who have already debuted…’

‘As expected, the expectations around a trainee personally brought in by someone who created three successful idol groups are extraordinary.’

‘No, wait, seeing them praise me as a “huge rookie,” does that mean they were watching me practice alone?’

‘I was so engrossed in practice that I didn’t notice at all.’

‘I was so excited, singing and making a fuss, thinking my skills weren’t dead yet.’

‘They saw all of that.’

‘This was my first time in such a situation, so I felt unnecessarily embarrassed.’

“Have you perhaps learned how to sing or dance before?”

‘How should I answer a question like this?’

‘Even though it doesn’t look like it, I made it to a boy group’s debut lineup, so I received an immense amount of lessons.’

‘But that was Shin Siwoo, who was on the verge of debut, not Hanasia, the trainee.’

‘Even when I was a man, I only received lessons after becoming a trainee, so should I say I haven’t learned before?’

‘Even so, saying I haven’t learned at all is a bit unreasonable given how good I am.’

‘Let’s just say I learned a little from the Teacher.’

“The Teacher taught me a little.”

“He taught you a little, and you’re already this good?”

“Yes…”

“Really? You’re really good. Is this what they call talent?”

She examined me from head to toe as if she had found something fascinating.

‘I’m drenched in sweat and my hair is a mess, so there’s nothing much to look at.’

“Shia, can I have your number?”

I was awkwardly shifting my gaze when I suddenly heard something unexpected.

“Number, you mean… phone number…?”

“Yeah. Because it looks like we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.”

‘What does “seeing a lot of each other” mean?’

‘Does it mean I’ll debut and be active?’

‘I hope that’s what it means.’

I typed my number into the smartphone she handed me and gave it back.

Her smile, which hadn’t faded, deepened even further this time.

It was almost scary.

“You have to answer when I call later, okay? Got it?”

“Yes…”

She ruffled my hair vigorously, saying words that made it sound like a big deal if I didn’t answer.

‘Even I feel sticky from the sweat, but she’s touching it without any hesitation; she seems a bit strange.’

“Then practice hard!”

‘How could her smile not disappear even once from the moment she entered until she left the practice room?’

‘She’s an eccentric person, but she’s definitely an amazing one.’

The four of them chatted excitedly among themselves as they left the practice room.

They suddenly burst in and then suddenly vanished.

It was truly disorienting.

I sat back down on the floor and looked at the clock on the wall.

‘I wish the Teacher would come soon.’