Chapter 45 : Black Cross

‘Saya Barnaba.’

It was the first time in 17 years that I had heard my full name from someone else.

“You are the last descendant of the Sarkas clan and a part of the goddess revival plan.”

“Goddess revival plan…?”

Chris stroked his dark gray hair.

“Haven’t you ever wondered about your hair color? In a place where it’s hard to see dark hair, let alone black hair, among so many people.”

My hair color was especially dark, even among those who were discriminated against for having black hair. Usually, black hair is dark navy or brown, but mine was completely black, to the point where it was invisible at night.

“…That’s because, Saya, you were made to be born that way.”

“What are you talking about, made…?”

Chris hesitated for a moment, then continued.

“You’ve heard of the Sarkas Cult, haven’t you? The religion that worships the Sarkas goddess and sacrifices humans as offerings to her.”

“…Of course. I’m sick and tired of it.”

“That belief of the Sarkas Cult actually stemmed from our Sarkas clan. The living proof of that is children with hair colors like ours.”

My head was spinning from all the shocking revelations.

“So, the Sarkas clan is actually the Sarkas Cult itself?”

“To be precise, the Sarkas clan was the first to worship the faith related to the goddess. The Sarkas Cult is a group that branched off from there.”

That damn Sarkas follows me like a curse wherever I go. I’m used to slicing that terrible monster with a sword, but now I’m a member of a clan with the same name.

“The Sarkas clan has always tried to get one step closer to the goddess. They believed that by drinking the blood of Sarkas and mixing their bodies, they could become one with them and hear the voice of the goddess.”

“…Mixing bodies…”

Even just hearing the explanation made me want to throw up.

“In that series of processes, they discovered that humans with dark hair color had a significantly higher assimilation rate with Sarkas.”

“Assimilation rate with Sarkas?”

“Do you remember the incident a while ago when a man named Julius drank the blood of an ancient species and transformed into a form mixed with Sarkas?”

How could I forget that? Even now, that terribly twisted form appears in my dreams.

“If a person with a low assimilation rate does that, they will end up transforming into a form close to a monster. Conversely, the higher the assimilation rate, the more they can maintain higher intelligence and a complete form while being combined with Sarkas.”

“…Then, the goddess revival plan, could it be…”

Chris nodded at me. He had a look on his face that I’d never seen before, a look that seemed to be intertwined with complex emotions.

“Their plan was to breed humans with black hair to create the darkest black. To create the human with the highest assimilation rate. The result of that was children like us.”

Sarkas? Breeding? Goddess?

Every word that came out of his mouth was disgusting. Breeding black-haired humans to combine with Sarkas? They were out of their minds.

“The black cross that you and I have had since birth is proof that we are victims of the goddess revival plan.”

I fiddled with the black cross hanging on my ear. This ornament, whose material and reason for being made I didn’t know, was proof of being a victim.

“…Chris, you were also born in that plan.”

In his eyes, I could feel an emotion that I didn’t know whether it was anger or sadness.

“That’s right. I was a failure born with dark gray hair, but Saya was different. To them, Saya was the perfect material for the goddess’s revival itself.”

“…Wait a minute.”

After throwing up once due to the feeling of nausea, I caught my breath and continued.

“I was the perfect ingredient for the Sarkas clan, but not for your parents. They chose to betray the clan and abandon you far away.”

“…What happened to my parents after that?”

“…I don’t think you’ll want to hear it, Saya.”

“…”

Anyway, I didn’t want to meet them. I just wanted to confirm that they weren’t as evil as I thought. If they’re already dead, that’s impossible now.

“…Were you, by any chance, planning to take me as a material, Chris?”

I got into a defensive posture and put my hand on my weapon.

“Of course not. We know that there is no such thing as a goddess in this world. As a comrade who was sacrificed to a false ritual, I just wanted to help you.”

Chris said that, but I couldn’t easily let my guard down against him. From the moment the Sarkas Cult was mentioned, he was no longer a member of a normal group.

“Besides, even if I believed in that myth, I have no reason to harm Saya. The Sarkas clan has already disappeared into the past.”

“Disappeared…?”

What did he mean by the expression, disappeared?

“Shortly after Saya was born, all the Sarkas clans in various places were massacred by order of the previous emperor. I was one of the few children who survived that process.”

The previous emperor was so strict that he ordered all Sarkas-related books in the country to be burned. He wouldn’t have left a group that continued to contact Sarkas alone, dreaming of a goddess revival.

“The heads of adults were blown off by the magic of the Spirit Masters, and countless children were stabbed with swords and killed. Even now, more than 10 years later, I remember the scene vividly.”

“…Are there any children like us still alive?”

He was a survivor of that incident. That meant that there were other children who survived the massacre.

“That’s right. I gathered a small number of surviving children and founded a resistance group. A group to reform the rotten empire and create a new era.”

“…In simple terms, a rebel group.”

“Well, that’s not wrong either.”

“But the one who carried out the massacre wasn’t the current emperor. He’s rather against discrimination.”

He was a person who took the lead in improving discriminatory perceptions, to the point where he asked me, who had black hair, to stand at the appointment ceremony.

“Just because one emperor has such thoughts, it won’t change the prejudices of the people that have continued for hundreds of years. We will choose a definite method, even if it means seeing blood.”

Chris smiled and held out his hand to me.

“I would like Saya to be with us.”

“…Why should I?”

“…Earlier, when I called you, I added the surname Barnaba, right? That surname was taken from a woman who made us who we are today. She was a woman who was captured as a victim of the goddess revival plan, but in a way, she became a common mother to us. It’s all thanks to her that we are alive and breathing in this place. We will create a society where everyone’s human rights are guaranteed, so that there will be no unnecessary sacrifices like she experienced.”

I stared at his outstretched hand for a long time. If Chris’s words are all true, they are my only blood relatives. They were the ones who had something in common with me in this world where I thought I was completely alone. It’s been 17 years since I faced their existence, and I should be happy, but I don’t feel that way at all.

“Will you join the Barnaba Resistance, Saya?”

I shook my head and refused his offer.

“Thank you for the offer, but I’m not interested in such grand things as rebellion.”

“…You don’t have to participate. Just being a member will boost the morale of the resistance.”

“I don’t plan to belong anywhere right now. And, I won’t use the surname Barnaba. I will decide where I belong myself.”

I had no intention of using the surname of a woman I had never seen before, just because we were connected by blood.

“…That’s a shame. If that’s what Saya thinks, I have no intention of forcing you.”

While I was standing facing him for a long time, I started to hear footsteps nearby. It was Cled’s voice calling my name and the footsteps of other instructors. If I leave him like this, he will look like a suspicious person to anyone who sees him standing in front of me.

“…What will you do? Will you hand me over to the academy, Saya?”

“…”

Although it ended in failure, he clearly tried to assassinate the commander of the Spirit Masters. As a Spirit Master, I should hold him accountable, but I still had a lot of questions to ask him. Why did he have to kill Violet, and what was the purpose of their rebellion?

So for now, I decided to let him go.

“Go. I’ll let you go.”

“Really?”

“Hurry. If you get caught here, you’ll be interrogated by the instructors.”

“I’ll repay this favor later, Spirit Master.”

He smiled at me, gave a light wave, and turned around.

“Oh, and…”

“…?”

“I was serious about wanting to dance with Saya.”

“Just go!”

Only when I shouted did he disappear into the forest. How can he have the audacity to joke in this situation? What kind of mindset does this guy have?

“Did something happen?”

Cled seemed to have followed me, leading the instructors. Perhaps he judged that I, who suddenly ran out, might be in danger, so he came quickly with all of their Osteons summoned.

“…No. I thought I saw someone here, but I think I mistook a wild animal for a person.”

“Solo actions during a mission are not good, Saya. Refrain from thinking about leaving alone again like in the previous mission.”

“…I’m sorry.”

Chris Barnaba.

The story he told me was something that I couldn’t readily accept. Things like the goddess revival plan and the resistance filled my head. Was it the right choice not to accept his offer?

If I hadn’t reincarnated as Saya, the girl in this novel, she would have died before she could even spend her unhappy childhood. There would have been no stopping Julius’s plan to assassinate the princess, and Chris would never have become the princess’s escort.

All of this was the result of my existence.

After finishing the ball that wasn’t like a ball, I came back to my room exhausted. Normally, as soon as I opened the door, Carne would have rushed to play with me or cried, but today it was unusually quiet.

‘I guess she’s already asleep today.’

I started to take off the dress I was wearing to wash off the sweat I had shed while running. I was planning to jump into bed and pass out as soon as I washed up.

“…Carne?”

Until I saw Carne Eckermann sitting on her own bed with a serious expression.

“We have a lot to talk about, Saya.”

She seemed to have completely returned to her former self.