Chapter 2 : Hospital

It felt like I had a dream after a long time.

A dream where I talked directly with Kanata-chan.

I didn’t wish for anything more.

Just being able to talk to her was happiness itself for me.

VTubers are idols.

I, who had only studied for the entrance exams, discovered VTubers and poured all my youth into making them known to the world.

Somewhere along the way, my real-life goal of getting into a good high school through the exams, making lots of friends I couldn’t make because I was busy studying, and having a cute girlfriend and enjoying a fun high school life had long since disappeared.
Or maybe it was a pipe dream.

Except for being good at studying, I was average or below average in everything else, so there was no way I could have a high school debut or anything like that.

But I had no regrets.

My body was in high school, but my heart was always in another world.

Another world, a utopia.

My love.

My light.

My life.

My joy.

My only haven.

VTubers had long become the meaning of my life.

Anyone who worked as a VTuber was fine by me.

If I found a relatively unknown or unpopular VTuber, it was given that I would make a video to introduce them to my subscribers.

Even if they were independent (individual VTubers not supported by companies), I didn’t care.

From the moment they became a VTuber, that didn’t matter anymore.

Rather, they deserve respect for making such a decision and spending a lot of money on their own, without the help of a company.

And…

Haruka Kanata.

The VTuber who led me to the world of VTubers, my favorite VTuber.

As a Kirinuki YouTuber, as someone who wanted to introduce VTubers to the world, I thought it was wrong to become close with her, a VTuber, and kept my distance, but honestly, I was also human, so my heart would pound and I’d smile brightly whenever she talked about me.

When she said she wanted to be friends, I was momentarily tempted.

But…

It didn’t make sense for me to be friends with her, who shone as a VTuber, as Haruka Kanata.

It shouldn’t be.

Her light might be obscured by a shadow like me.

So, no.

I can’t…

…

…

Me too…

***

“…?”

The pungent smell of medicine, a white ceiling I’d never seen before.

‘What happened…?’

I slightly turned my head to look to the side.

An IV drip connected to a needle inserted into my arm caught my eye.

Only then did I realize where I was.

A place I rarely had reason to visit.

A hospital.

‘Why am I… in the hospital…?’

I rolled my eyes, still lying down, to see if there were any other patients around, but it seemed I was alone in this room.

Is this a hospital with few people?

Or is it a private room?

‘Aren’t private rooms expensive…?’

No, that’s not what I should be wondering about…

Why am I in the hospital?

As I rolled my eyes around in confusion, I suddenly felt something long and cumbersome trailing behind me.

‘Is this… hair?’

I didn’t cut my hair often, but it hadn’t been that long since I last cut it.

I wondered if my voice had also changed, so I opened my mouth and tried to speak.

“Ah… Ahh…”

It’s coming out… Huh?

“My voice… uh…?”

Why does it sound so high pitched and thin?

My original voice wasn’t low, but it was a neutral voice, not this high.

But this is…

Like a little girl’s voice.

“Phone… My phone…”

I hurriedly reached out to find my phone.

That’s when it happened.

*Creak*, the door opened and someone came in.

“Oh.”

A girl with light brown hair styled in neat curls, a cute, young face with large eyes, and stylish casual clothes stared at me with wide eyes.

A genuinely surprised expression, so surprised that she dropped what she was holding.

“Mei…?”

Hashimoto Mei.

My younger sister.

***

Mei, realizing I had woken up, immediately called our parents to tell them the news.

Then, as if it were unbelievable, my parents quickly drove to the hospital.

“Haruto…”

Mother didn’t say anything.

She just… looked at me with tearful, worried eyes.

Father was the same.

Mei…

She didn’t seem to care much, looking at her phone, but she seemed to glance at me from time to time.

“Um… Patient?”

“Y-Yes…?”

“Are you aware of your current situation?”

“… Not exactly, but… My body, it changed… right…?”

“… That’s correct.”

It seemed so.

I hadn’t seen a mirror yet, but if I had changed this drastically and abnormally…

And if my voice had changed to sound like a girl’s, it meant one thing.

“It’s TS Syndrome.”

TS Syndrome.

I’ve seen it a few times in the VTuber community.

I’d seen some people writing weird, fetishizing posts about wanting to have ‘teetee’ with VTubers after getting TS Syndrome.

But I never thought I’d get it…

“…”

It felt strange.

I touched my suffocating chest.

“We don’t know much about the mechanism of this disease, so it’s difficult to explain it to you. It’s an extremely rare disease worldwide. Of course, it’s not completely non-existent, so there is government support for it, and you can choose what you want.”

“Choose… Can you change her back to a boy…?!”

Mother, who had a glimmer of hope at the word “choose,” asked the doctor.

But the doctor shook his head.

“Unfortunately… It’s impossible for a patient with TS Syndrome to revert to their original gender.”

It’s impossible.

The doctor stated the truth calmly, firmly establishing that fact.

Mother seemed shocked by the doctor’s words, unable to speak and sinking into her chair.

“There are two options, as I mentioned. Would you like to hear them?”

At the doctor’s question, I looked at my parents for a moment.

Mother hung her head with a dazed expression, and Father still looked at me with worried eyes.

Seeing them, I nodded to the doctor.

Because I had already made up my mind.

***

The doctor left.

My parents remained silent for a while.

They seemed to be giving me time to gather my thoughts.

Because there would be no more “Hashimoto Haruto” in the world.

But they said only my outward identity would change, everything else would remain the same, so there wouldn’t be any major problems.

The option I chose, as someone who had few friends and mostly interacted with my family, was to settle all my relationships, transfer schools, and live a new life without telling anyone about the TS Syndrome.

I thought it was better that way.

‘Well… It doesn’t really matter…’

Since I already valued VTubers more than myself, the most important thing to me now was how many days had passed.

I immediately checked the date on the phone my parents gave me.

And I was horrified.

‘A-A week has passed…?!’

No.

I, who never forgot to upload videos every day, hadn’t uploaded anything for a week.

The subscribers, the VTubers…

Kanata-chan would surely be disappointed.

That can’t happen…!

I quickly went to the YouTube Community and wrote a post.

Then, I took a picture of the hospital room, blurred out any personally identifiable information, and uploaded it.

Since I started my channel, I had never taken a break and uploaded videos every single day. This was the first time I hadn’t uploaded anything for a whole week.

I thought I had to tell the community about my current situation.

*Ding*, I breathed a sigh of relief after confirming that the post was uploaded.

I put out the fire for now.

To completely extinguish it, I had to go back and start making videos again.

But for now, I had to stay in the hospital for a while because my body had become weak due to the changes.

I had no choice but to take a few more days off from video production.

Now then…

All that’s left is to get used to this body.

“…”

I looked at the mirror beside me.

In the mirror, a cute girl with fluffy, long, light brown hair stared back at me.

Cute.

But… is this girl in the mirror really me?

I asked myself that question.

Although it seemed like a philosophical question at first glance, the answer came quite easily.

Since the me as a Kirinuki YouTuber is the real me, what does it matter?

That simple answer.

I grinned.

And the girl in the mirror grinned back.