Chapter 9: But I refuse

I…I came to my senses again.

I was momentarily stunned by the words that came out of the woman’s mouth, but soon regained my senses and looked at her.

I couldn’t understand why this girl, who looked like she was in her teens, was telling me to kill her.

No, in fact, I could roughly guess the reason. She was probably mobilized for the war, realized the cruelty of the scene, and her mind broke down.

In terms of timing, she would have come to Ionia at least a year ago, during the Noxus invasion, which means she has been wandering this land aimlessly for a year.

Even if she was a child mobilized for the war, she would definitely be tired and exhausted if she spent a year without a place to stay. It wouldn’t be unreasonable for her mind to collapse.

But there would be many people who lost their families due to the Noxus invasion, so where would there be residents who would accept this girl staying here? Even I am being ostracized for having a child with a Noxian.

Let’s organize this situation now. I want to help the girl, but I can’t help a Noxian. I have to solve this paradoxical situation.

Hmm… It’s not that difficult. If what she said to me is sincere, that is.

I lifted her body, brought my mouth to her ear, and whispered.

“But I refuse.”

Then she looked at me with surprised eyes and said in a tone that she couldn’t believe.

“Wh…why…? Why won’t you kill… me? I’ve killed too many people! I don’t have any reason to live anymore!”

She still wasn’t used to Ionian, so it was difficult to understand because her pronunciation was sometimes off, but it wasn’t that big of a problem. I brought my face in front of her face, made eye contact, and said.

“You have no reason to live? Rather, you should live harder than anyone else. That will be atonement for the people you have killed so far.”

Hearing my words, she seemed to have thought of something in her heart, and she didn’t answer my words and just knelt down quietly.

I felt sorry for her, but I didn’t show it and stood her up. Now I have to prevent her from choosing death. It won’t be too late to treat her mind after that.

Then, what is the way to keep her away from death? Ironically, it was to use her guilt.

It was like digging into her painful past, but that was the only way I could think of to save her right now.

“Don’t think about getting comfortable with death. You don’t deserve to think like that right now.”

With those words, I took her and went to the old woman’s house. Even though she lost her sons in the war with Noxus, I thought she would still help her, just like she took care of me, who had a relationship with a Noxian.

It was a fresh reminder that I really owed the old woman a lot. If it weren’t for that person, I don’t know what would have happened to me on the first day I came here.

Maybe I would have suffered from a sudden labor pain without knowing anything and ended up in a dangerous situation from exhaustion.

Anyway, I prayed that the old woman would take care of this girl, and I supported the girl and headed to their house.

Come to think of it, I said all sorts of things without knowing this girl’s name. I asked her to find out her name now.

“Now that things have turned out like this, I’ve been here without even knowing your name. What’s your name?”

Then she thought for a moment and then answered me.

“Riven… Please call me Riven.”

Riven… It was a name that suited her broken and shattered sword. Thinking that, I said to her.

“Riven. That’s a good name. I am…”

But what should I say when I say my name? My name as a former man? Or the name of this body that lives here now?

I hesitated a bit about which one to say, but I decided to choose the most ordinary option.

“…You can just call me Set’s mom. Or call me sister comfortably.”

A name is a word that represents another person. I thought that so-and-so’s mom was the best expression of who I am now, so I said this.

“Okay… Sister.”

Riven didn’t say it, as if she was burdened by those words.

While we were talking, we arrived at the old woman’s house. I knocked on the door of the house and called out to the old woman.

“Oma! Are you inside? Can you come out for a moment?”

Then I heard footsteps from inside, and soon the old woman came out and greeted me.

“Oh my, why is Vastaya Miss here. Have you finished all the farm work… Who is this young lady?”

I roughly explained her to the old woman who saw Riven next to me. Fortunately, it seemed that the old woman had decided to take her in.

In order to find out more about her, the old woman and I asked Riven various questions about her past, but she seemed to have forgotten most of her past memories, whether it was caused by what she experienced during the war.

What she remembered was that she was from Noxus and that she went to war and killed many people. And the faintest memory was that flaming arrows flew in and…

Riven, who had said that far, covered her head with her hands and groaned as if she had a headache. It seemed that this memory was the biggest reason why she lost her memory.

There was nothing more we could find out right now, and she seemed to be very tired, so we decided to let her rest first.

I’ll feed her warm food when she wakes up after sleeping. There’s no match for food.