Chapter 50: Han Do-young

The place Kim Ga-eul and I arrived at was the hospital rooftop.
It was called the Sky Garden, and it was filled with sunflowers that had grown under the summer sun.

Kim Ga-eul wiped the dust off the bench where I would sit with her hand.

“Please sit.”

“Thanks.”

I took out my handkerchief, intending to wipe her spot too, but Kim Ga-eul sat down first.

“Were you just about to wipe my seat with that handkerchief?”

“I can’t just keep receiving.”

“…You really are similar.”

‘Similar…?’

Kim Ga-eul looked up at the clear, cloudless sky and changed the subject.

“Actually, I had an older brother. His name was Kim Maeum.”

“…This is the first I’m hearing of it.”

I pretended not to know.
Having already read the original work, I knew Kim Noeul had a younger sibling.

But it wasn’t a complete lie.

The Kim Maeum I knew from the original was a girl.
In this world, the gender had been reversed.
So, I hadn’t known there was a ‘male’ relative named Kim Maeum.

“Kim Noeul never really talked about her family.”

“That makes sense. My brother died.”

Kim Ga-eul’s expression as she spoke calmly was unexpectedly serene.
Perhaps she had already grown accustomed to life without her brother.

“I feel bad now, hearing about this.”

“I wanted to tell you, so you don’t need to feel sorry, Oppa.”

“The reason you’re telling me about your brother is…?”

“My brother was a victim of bullying.”

“……”

“He wasn’t bullied from the start. Like my sister, he was popular. But he got targeted by some bad kids for helping another bullying victim.”

It was exactly the same as the setting in the original work.
I remembered feeling inwardly furious while reading the episode about Kim Noeul’s family history.

“Just like that… he fell from the school rooftop. Back then, the rooftop wasn’t off-limits yet.”

Kim Ga-eul’s serene expression gradually distorted.

“Even now, I grind my teeth thinking about those perpetrators, but what angers me most is myself for not being a source of strength for my brother. I realized too late….”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, I know. I know very well how self-destructive it is to blame yourself. I used to not understand people like that. But when I became that person myself, it was really hard not to.”

“…There are quite a few cases like that.”

Even Seo Yoon, though it wasn’t her fault, felt guilty for not protecting Jeong Sohae and is now affiliated with Ojakgyo to cover hospital bills.

“You asked earlier, right? Why I’m telling you this story about my brother, Oppa.”

“Yeah.”

“Maru Oppa, you’re similar. To my brother.”

“Me?”

“Not that your faces are similar… but your aura is. When my brother was suffering badly from bullying, he often had an expression like he’d lost something. I got a similar feeling from you, Maru Oppa.”

‘What I’ve lost.’

Mulling over Kim Ga-eul’s words, my chest felt heavy.

It seemed my expression revealed what I had left behind in the past, what I regretted.

People living ordinary lives wouldn’t know, but those who have experienced similar pain are sensitive to recognizing the sad expressions of their kin.

“I’m sorry. I suddenly made you seem like a troubled person, Oppa.”

“I don’t mind. It’s not entirely wrong either.”

Kim Ga-eul stopped looking at the sky and lowered her head, staring at the ground.

“My sister probably felt something similar when she saw you, Maru Oppa. She clings to you often, right?”

“…She does.”

“It’s probably for the reason I mentioned. My sister is fulfilling her longing through you, Maru Oppa.”

That was why Kim Noeul showed interest in me initially, and why she had panic attacks when I volunteered for dangerous actions.

Fear of losing someone again.

That trauma held Kim Noeul tightly in its grip.

“Lately, the plans my sister and Maru Oppa were carrying out were going well, so I thought maybe she was getting better, but it seems the trauma resurfaced after the rotary brawl.”

“I understand why you’re telling me this. In the end, the one who can stabilize Kim Noeul’s mental state is….”

“Oppa.”

Kim Ga-eul turned her head to look at me.
Her gaze was very similar to Kim Noeul’s.

“I know this is really shameless, but please… help my sister….”

Kim Ga-eul’s complexion darkened, perhaps feeling sorry for placing this burden on me.
But Kim Ga-eul didn’t need to worry.

“I don’t know if Kim Noeul told you, but she and I are sort of… partners? You could see it that way.”

“…Partners?”

“We share the same fate. We’ve already come this far, neither Kim Noeul nor I can betray the other.”

As long as we were on the same boat, the anti-Ojakgyo faction, we had to move forward together.

“And she’s helped me a lot, so I guess it’s time for me to help her too.”

At my candid confession, Kim Ga-eul half-closed her eyes.
Tears began to well up in her eyes.

“You really… really are similar…. To my brother….”

She murmured and looked up at me with reddened eyes.

Looking into those eyes, I could tell.

That my existence was helpful not only to Kim Noeul but also to the girl before me.

That there was another girl besides Kim Noeul who needed help.

“You might think this is strange, but….”

Sniffling, she gently took my hand.

“Could you pinch my cheek just once?”

“Your cheek…?”

“…My brother used to do that often.”

It wasn’t a difficult request, so I lightly pinched her soft cheek.
It was smooth like baby skin.

Her cheek stretched slightly as she gave a faint smile.

“…Thank you. You could have done it harder.”

“I was afraid you’d cry more.”

After finishing our conversation, we went down to the floor where Kim Noeul’s hospital room was.
Kim Ga-eul went to buy drinks, saying I should talk to Kim Noeul alone.

When I returned to the room, I saw Kim Noeul munching on an apple on the bed.

She hadn’t noticed me come in and was staring blankly at the wall-mounted TV screen.

When I cleared my throat, she finally turned towards me.

“You came early.”

Perhaps because I had already mentioned in the counseling club chat that I would visit, she wasn’t surprised.
She offered me the apple bowl.

“Have some.”

“I’m fine.”

“Did you meet Ga-eul?”

“Yeah. She went to buy drinks just now.”

After exchanging a brief conversation, we fell silent.
Kim Noeul didn’t speak first, keeping her head down and chewing the apple.

As I watched her quietly, her cheeks flushed slightly, and she spoke.

“What are you staring at?”

“Just thinking you went through a lot. Heard you got hit quite a bit.”

“What are you talking about…. Je Galyeonhwa probably got it worse than me.”

She tried hard to express confidence, but both she and I knew it.
Kim Noeul’s confidence had dropped significantly.

“…Maru.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think I can do it?”

Hearing Kim Noeul sound weak for the first time, I couldn’t say anything.

“I’ve worked so hard until now… but I’m not sure. I doubt my abilities.”

“You’re actually very capable. There’s no one else like you in Hakdo.”

I praised her objectively.

Kim Noeul had been injured quite badly even by Je Galhwarin.
Yet, in this short time, she had grown enough to face Je Galyeonhwa.

It wasn’t just about fighting.
She was steadily growing in academics and leadership too.

Realistically, apart from Alice, there probably wasn’t another all-rounder like her.

But my words offered no comfort at all.

Even if Kim Noeul’s potential was outstanding, her current self still had a long way to go.

She was anxious.

“……”

“Je Galyeonhwa was lucky to get close to me like that, but will she fight the same way next time?”

“If she gained information about you, you also gained information about her. There’s no need to be disheartened.”

“What about Seo Yoon?”

Kim Noeul suddenly asked back.

“Do you think I can beat Seo Yoon?”

“Of course.”

“What about Alice?”

“……Of course.”

For a moment, my answer was unintentionally delayed.

Even though I firmly believed in Kim Noeul, my true feelings were honest.

Even in the original work, the scene where Kim Noeul and Alice fought never appeared.
It was still an ongoing webtoon, and I had reincarnated into this world before seeing the ending.

“You’re skeptical too.”

“……”

“Ha…. It hurts my pride. Realizing where I stand is depressing. It feels like I’ve passed the peak of Mount Stupid.”

“Then the only way left is up.”

“Thanks. I should probably work out during the break. Maybe learn some martial arts if possible.”

At first glance, the conversation seemed to end smoothly, but the reality hadn’t changed.
Kim Noeul’s expression was still dark.
She felt skeptical about herself.

‘In the original work, time solved it.’

In this situation, if I kept offering empty encouragement, it would only hurt Kim Noeul’s pride.
She needed time alone.

‘During the break, I should also ask about Kim Maeum while I’m at it. She needs to properly face the past.’

I had no intention of breaking my promise to Kim Ga-eul.
Kim Noeul had to change after the break.

“Have you been to see Doa Sunbae? It’s the same hospital.”

I shook my head at Kim Noeul’s question.

“No, I came to see you first.”

“…Really?”

Her dark complexion brightened slightly.

“Go show your face at least. Doa Sunbae gets sulky easily, you know.”

“That’s true.”

After replying, I left Kim Noeul’s room.
On my way to Han Doa’s room, I met Kim Ga-eul again.

“Oh? I bought drinks, aren’t you having any?”

“I will. I’m just going to visit an acquaintance upstairs.”

“Ah, that Disciplinary Department Head person.”

Kim Ga-eul handed me a can of juice and continued.

“How was the conversation with my sister?”

“…It seemed like she needs some time.”

“I guess it’s hard to bounce back right away.”

“But I have no intention of retracting what I said. I’ll definitely take responsibility for Kim Noeul.”

“……”

Hearing my words, Kim Ga-eul stared at me intently.
Then she muttered softly, almost inaudibly to me.

“…I envy my sister.”

“What?”

“It’s nothing. Sorry for keeping you long. I’ll be cheering for you two.”

With a somewhat lonely expression, she walked towards Kim Noeul’s room.

Before I could understand Kim Ga-eul’s subtle emotional shift, the elevator arrived.
I stopped thinking and boarded the elevator.

Han Doa’s room was at the end of the corridor.
As I got closer to her room, two women standing nearby stopped me.

One wore a suit, the other a modified Hanbok.
The peculiar thing was that both had wooden swords hanging at their waists.

‘Even if they aren’t real swords, carrying weapons in a hospital suggests they have considerable influence.’

Knowing Han Doa’s family background to some extent, I quickly understood.

“Are you here for a visit?”

“Yes.”

“Your name?”

“Kim Maru, from the same school.”

One woman asked my purpose for visiting.
The other woman entered Han Doa’s room and came out shortly after.

“You may enter.”

As I stepped into Han Doa’s room, Han Doa, with her face and arm wrapped in bandages, looked at me.

“Thanks for coming.”

“You fought hard for us, of course I should come. When will you be discharged?”

“Probably next week, give or take.”

“You’ll be here quite a while…. Ah, this is a gift.”

I placed a box of Vitamin C drinks on the table beside the bed.
Han Doa bowed her head slightly.

“You didn’t have to come empty-handed, this is burdensome….”

“I would have felt burdened if I had.”

“Did Noeul Hubae look alright?”

“Yes. You should probably worry more about the person she fought.”

Hearing my words, her expression darkened.

“…Right. Noeul Hubae fought well.”

‘Did I touch a sensitive subject?’

Feeling inwardly guilty, I tried to change the subject, but Han Doa spoke first.

“I’m ashamed. I said I would be helpful, but I ended up showing such a disgrace.”

“No one would blame you, sunbae. Who else would have faced Lee Jihye if not you?”

“The fact remains that I lost.”

Han Doa clenched her fist with the unbandaged hand.
The bedsheet wrinkled.

“The only field I could be helpful in was fighting, and I couldn’t even do that…. I feel like I’m disqualified as the Disciplinary Department Head.”

Both Kim Noeul and Han Doa were feeling intense self-reproach after the rotary brawl.

“Maybe it’s better to give up on academics and focus on martial arts….”

“Sunbae.”

When I cut her off, Han Doa flinched and glanced at me.
She looked scared as if sensing my unusual demeanor.

“Think about your priorities. Of course, the fight against Ojakgyo is important, but ultimately, that’s also so you can study with peace of mind, Sunbae.”

“……”

“Was my tutoring really that boring?”

“That’s not it! Rather, I wanted to do it every day…!”

Suddenly agitated, Han Doa blurted out unintentional words and her face turned red.
Her words trailing off, she lowered her head and muttered softly.

“…So, I want to continue the tutoring.”

“That’s a relief. Your thoughts didn’t drift in a strange direction.”

“Sorry.”

Han Doa scratched the back of her neck, seeming bothered by her long hair.

‘She usually wears a ponytail, but maybe she couldn’t tie it now because she can’t move one arm?’

Seeing her hair flowing down beautifully, it matched her neat appearance well, further emphasizing the image of a daughter from a respectable family.

‘Which she actually is.’

“Your hair is very long.”

“Ah…. I was thinking maybe I should cut it soon. It gets in the way when fighting too.”

I felt sorry, but Han Doa’s combat ability wouldn’t change just by cutting her hair.
She needed to properly resolve her past entanglement with Lee Jihye to grow.
At least, that’s how it was in the webtoon.

“There’s no need to cut it when you’ve grown it out.”

“Perhaps… does it look better long?”

“Huh?”

I wondered why she was suddenly asking such a thing, but unlike usual, Han Doa didn’t change the subject and stared intently as if waiting for my answer.

“I think a long ponytail suits you. That’s just my personal opinion, though.”

“Hmm, is that so.”

Han Doa suddenly muttered, “Where’s my hair tie?” and started looking for it.
Finding the tie, she tried to tie it with one hand, but it didn’t seem easy.

“Need help?”

“I’d appreciate it if you would.”

As if she had expected it, she readily handed me the hair tie.
She started to explain how to tie her hair, but my hands were already expertly tying a ponytail.

“…Maru Hubae, you’re quite skilled at this?”

I sensed an inexplicable chill in Han Doa’s voice.

“When I was young at the orphanage, I tied my younger siblings’ hair a few times.”

Incidentally, I had also tied Alice’s hair before.

“Ah, uh, sorry.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Just as I finished tying her hair in the awkward atmosphere, an unfamiliar voice came from the doorway of the hospital room.

“What a rare sight. Doa letting someone touch her hair.”

Han Doa and I simultaneously looked towards the source of the voice.

Standing there was a woman with long, straight hair wearing a modest Hanbok.
When Han Doa’s hair was down, she exuded a very similar atmosphere to this woman.

Seeing her, Han Doa’s voice trembled.

“Mother….”