Chapter 2: Serious oo addiction

There were no parents. Let alone siblings.

Still, I lived a normal life. Fortunately, there was no one around who looked down on me for being an orphan.

But that was all. I was needlessly kind, stepped forward for no reason, and lost everything.

When I received thanks from that child’s parents, and the media briefly hailed me as a hero who sacrificed myself to save a young life, I thought I was someone important.

Unaware that what remained for me after the feeling of joy was hell.

In the dark room, the ticking of the clock sounded unusually loud.

The only light source was the monitor, where guns and cold weapons clashed fiercely.

Engrossed in the game with nothing else to do, I suddenly turned my head and saw a photo of my past self.

My past self, running around perfectly fine on the playground, was smiling brightly.

‘I don’t want to see it anymore.’

I turned my head away from the photo as if I had seen something I shouldn’t have.

It was a past I couldn’t return to anyway. No matter how much I blamed myself, my legs, which could no longer move, wouldn’t start moving again.

With my mood completely sunken, I had no desire to play games either.

‘Let’s stop here for today.’

The power button of the computer I was engrossed in was pressed, and darkness gradually began to fall over the monitor.

With the computer turned off, the room became completely dark. I dragged my body out of the chair and towards the bed with my two still-functional arms.

Letting out a sigh mixed with fatigue, I finally reached the bed and let my body fall onto it.

The bed’s softness, which had felt awkward at first, became more comfortable than anything else as time passed.

I wasn’t sleepy at all, but I forced my eyes shut, if only to shake off this feeling.

Just like that, a day no different from usual, a day filled only with torment, should have passed…

“……”

A cold, damp sensation against my back and the pungent smell of earth stinging my nose. It was certainly not a bed.

As the unfamiliar sensation kept digging in, I silently opened my eyes.

Looking around, what I saw was not my home, but the lush, yet somewhat familiar, scenery of a forest, and… a chest.

Everything was sudden. All I could do was stare with wide, rabbit-like eyes.

At the time, I considered that place hell, but looking back now, I felt it was fortunate that it was me.

‘I know. I know it sounds crazy. But what can I do?’

Though it was extreme, that day was truly the first time in a long while that I felt a genuine emotion.

****

– Good morning~!

I opened my eyes to the alarm blaring in my ears.

I reached out, turned off the alarm, and checked the time.

6:05.

“Haa…”

Seeing the time, a sigh escaped me naturally.

The alarm I originally set was for 5:40 AM.

This meant I hadn’t heard the alarm, which rang every five minutes, for 25 minutes.

‘If it were before, I would have woken up long ago and been tidying the campsite… I’m already becoming lazy.’

Leaving the bedroom, I saw the living room. It was still an overwhelmingly grand house.

I passed through the living room and headed to the kitchen.

Footsteps should have been audible, but strangely, there was no sound at all.

Without turning on the lights, I sat on any available chair in the kitchen.

Similarly, only the sound of the chair dragging was heard; there was no sign of anyone else.

‘Before, I would have headed to the bathroom to wash my face first, but after years of dry-washing, my habits have changed.’

Leaning my whole body back against the chair, I chewed on bread. It wasn’t special bread. In fact, it was just plain sliced bread, so ordinary that it felt out of place in the luxurious atmosphere of the house.

As I chewed the bread, my throat slowly began to feel blocked, but I didn’t feel like drinking water.

‘Rather, if I just choked and collapsed like this, and woke up, I’d be back there…’

– Bang!

‘Snap out of it.’

Only after slamming the table did my mind feel a little clearer.

It hurt especially because it was a sturdy wooden table, but it was the best way to clear my head.

Ignoring the throbbing pain in my hand, I frantically searched for the water bottle and chugged it.

In my haste, a lot of water spilled, but I didn’t care.

Thud! The sound of the water bottle being put down echoed loudly.

I clumsily wiped the water with my sleeve.

‘Well, I’ve managed one meal. Now, I should wash up.’

There was no one to see, so I unbuttoned my pajamas one by one as I headed to the bathroom.

With the rustling sound of fabric, my clothes dropped to the floor.

When I arrived in front of the sink, the naked body of a pure white girl, without a stitch of clothing, was reflected in the mirror beyond.

Snow-white hair that reached her waist. A body with suitable curves and a decent height, just enough to be presentable. And… thin eyes that made it impossible to discern her intentions.

Even unwashed and disheveled, her beauty was unfading, an optimal complexion for eliciting a positive impression from people.

Of course, from that perspective, those eyes were a blemish.

However, as the owner of this body, I immediately understood my state.

I was angry. I didn’t know why, but I was extremely angry.

‘No, maybe I do know the reason. I just don’t want to admit it.’

A strong killing intent emanated from her slender body. So much so that I felt it was fortunate I hadn’t gone out.

“Crazy b*tch.”

‘No matter how annoying something is, if you show it outwardly like this, what else would you be but a crazy b*tch?’

“Let’s just shower.”

‘Right. I’ll feel better after a shower.’

When I turned on the faucet, cold water came out of the showerhead for a moment, then hot water began to flow.

Standing outside and waiting blankly, I moved my feet into the shower stall.

“Haa……”

Hot water and steam drenched my body. Once the heat enveloped me, I felt a little better.

After finishing my shower, I threw myself onto the bed. My naked body glistened with water, and the dampness of my un-dried hair transferred to my back.

After lying there for a moment, my calmly settled thoughts led to a conclusion.

“I’m bored.”

Everything flowed conveniently. My status, food, clothing, and shelter, even money for luxuries. Even this body was still the same.

While I felt it was a natural treatment considering all the humiliations I had endured, there was also a part of me that felt burdened by it.

Only the first few days were good. Now, I felt no emotion at all.

The first luxury I indulged in my life left behind only boxes piled up in an empty room and the realization that I wasn’t this kind of person.

‘It just… wasn’t fun.’

I reached out my hand into the air and made a fist. Naturally, I grasped nothing.

But the shape of my hand was as if it were holding something. As if gripping a bladed weapon that fit perfectly in one hand……

“I miss it…”

Suddenly, a memory from the past flashed by.

That day was also a victory, no different from usual.

I, too, was looking up at the sky, just as usual.

Soon after, I succumbed to the spreading sleeping gas, and the place where I opened my eyes was an unfamiliar laboratory.

“Welcome. Is this our first time meeting like this?”

A familiar woman’s voice, one I had heard through the speaker every time, utterly unforgettable.

There, I met the organizer of this experiment for the first time.

She, as beautiful as I was, smiled and offered me coffee.

‘What was my expression like then?’

‘Right. I was so dumbfounded by her unparalleled brazenness that I just froze.’

I definitely had a lot I wanted to say.

‘Why me? Why do you keep doing this? What’s the meaning of it?’

‘I had thought that if I ever met her, I would grab her by the collar first.’

But when the opportunity actually arose, I quietly sat opposite her, accepted the coffee, drank it, and engaged in a serious conversation.

In a calm atmosphere, she smiled and faithfully answered my questions.

Even as the time for farewell approached, I couldn’t pour out my resentment towards her.

After that day, whenever I recalled that memory, I couldn’t understand my own feelings.

But now, I felt like I understood.

I didn’t want to admit it, but now I had to.

‘I had been looking forward to it. Not hoping to return someday, but for the exhilaration I would feel in the next experiment.’

The meaning of the bitter smile I wore when I first opened my eyes at home finally made sense.

Perhaps my becoming like this was a predetermined course of events.

My outstretched hand dropped weakly.

“Haa…”

A sigh, whose count I had lost, escaped me.

‘Admitting my own feelings is something to praise. But that’s not a solution, is it…’

‘As time passes, I feel myself slowly going crazy. To think the day would come when I’d touch this again…’

I had vowed never to touch it again, remembering the helpless old days that came to mind just by looking at it… but in the face of boredom, my self-control was nothing more than a sandcastle before a wave.

Since I couldn’t find enjoyment in most activities, I eventually came full circle and ended up here.

‘Ah. Will I also end up corrupting myself like this, in the end?’

At first, there was at least a sense of rejection, but now, such feelings had long vanished.

‘Didn’t they say the first time is always the hardest, and it gets easier after that?’

– Clang! Clang!

The clear sound of a hammer ringing in my ears.

– Pshhhhhh!

Soon, steam burst forth with a cool sound, signaling the completion of the work.

What was thus completed was…

– [Steel knife completed!]

Subtitles appeared over the image of an unknown, benevolent-looking old man chattering in a language that wasn’t Korean.

That sharp blade, and the grip that felt like it would fit perfectly in my hand. Just imagining it…

“Cool…”

It was the fifth day since I returned, and I found myself engrossed in MeTube again, just as I had been indebted to it before.

‘I really only meant to watch for a moment, but it turned out to be too interesting…’