Chapter 34 : The Following Gaze (10)

‘Ah…’

Hyunwoo swallowed a sigh. ‘So this was why he seemed to be lost in thought lately.’ His trembling gaze was fixed on him. He considered equivocating for a moment, seeing the eyes full of anxiety and worry, but then he stopped.

He didn’t want to lie to Jisung, who had been carefully thinking and asking questions ever since he heard it from Bae Yejun.

But if he told the truth, he would surely be hurt. Knowing that he would undoubtedly feel the pain as if it were his own, the words wouldn’t come out easily.

“…What do you mean by that?”

Sunwoo, who had been silent, finally couldn’t contain his curiosity and spoke. Sunwoo’s brow was furrowed. Considering the environment he grew up in, it would naturally be an incomprehensible story for him.

Hyunwoo glanced at Yuaan. He too was checking on Sunwoo, then looked at Hyunwoo. A brief silence passed between the two. Yuaan’s lips moved, then closed. His two clenched fists were trembling slightly.

‘…So, it’s okay to tell him.’

Yuaan had kept the things that had happened to him a secret, fearing Sunwoo would be hurt. Nevertheless, Sunwoo, seeing Yuaan’s poor complexion whenever he used his abilities, felt something was wrong and pressed for the reason. Each time, Yuaan would equivocate and brush it off. But this time, since Jisung had heard the truth from Bae Yejun, Yuaan, believing it was impossible to hide it any longer, finally agreed to Hyunwoo telling the truth.

It was quite heartbreaking to have to tell the truth, knowing it would hurt.

“…It happened a long time ago, before I awakened as an S-Rank.”

“…!!”

The two Guides’ gazes were fixed on Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo took a brief breath, looking at the two with the same expression.

“What, what do you mean…”

Sunwoo muttered in disbelief.

“It was various experiments combined with ability tests, and drug tests. That’s also when I developed a tolerance to poison…”

“…Did the Center do that on their own?”

“…”

Hyunwoo slowly closed and opened his eyes. The people in suits who were sometimes standing outside when experiments were being conducted… they weren’t Center employees. Their true identities, which he later confirmed on TV, were…

“The president knew about it, so it wasn’t done on their own.”

Sunwoo’s eyes widened.

“…Lie…”

A harsh English word followed the softly muttered Korean. It had been a long time since he had heard Sunwoo speak English, not since shortly after he became Yuaan’s Guide.

‘…He must be that flustered.’

Hyunwoo turned his gaze. Unlike what he had expected, Jisung was looking at him with a calm face. But he could tell. Jisung’s heartbeat, as heard by an Esper’s sensitive hearing, was making a painfully unstable sound.

“Hyung…”
“…Did it hurt?”
“Huh…?”
“No, of course it hurt. I’m sorry…”

Jisung’s expression hardened. Seeing his eyes darken, Hyunwoo gently stroked Jisung’s hair.

“At first… but as time passed, it didn’t matter anymore. The pain, the agony, the sadness… nothing truly mattered. I just, simply… waited for the end.”

A flat, emotionless voice was heard. Jisung lowered his head at his expression, which was so calm it seemed as if nothing bothered him.

Hyunwoo’s hand touched Jisung’s cheek. Tears flowing down his cheek streamed onto the back of his hand.

“It really doesn’t bother me at all anymore. So, don’t cry, Hyung.”

“I’m sorry…”

Hyunwoo’s eyes widened.

“Hy-Hyung, why are you apologizing?”

“I’m sorry…”

Hyunwoo, flustered and at a loss for what to do at Jisung’s apology, reached out his arms and pulled Jisung into his embrace. As he hugged him tightly, Jisung reached behind his back and gripped his collar tightly.

Hyunwoo slowly stroked his hair, as if his desperate touch was saying he wouldn’t let go.

His chest felt heavy yet ticklish.

“…I’ll just go get some water.”

“Oh? Uh, me too…!”

As Sunwoo stood up, Yuaan hastily followed him out.

In the quiet hospital room, only Jisung’s watery breaths and Hyunwoo’s breaths could be heard.

“…If only I had met you earlier… If only I had…”

He had lived peacefully by himself. That fact weighed heavily on him. If only he had met Hyunwoo a little earlier, would he have been able to do more? Would he have been able to help Hyunwoo sooner, so he wouldn’t suffer, wouldn’t struggle?

“That’s not your fault, Hyung. And for me, meeting you is enough. You came to me at the moment I needed you most.”

As Jisung looked up, Hyunwoo met his eyes and smiled.

“So, don’t apologize. Because every moment I spend with you is happy.”

“That sounds like a confession…”

“Hehe, does it?”

Hyunwoo smiled brightly. Jisung looked at him and smiled, his face on the verge of tears. Jisung’s hand cupped Hyunwoo’s cheek. His jet-black, cat-like eyes held only Jisung. Always, only that one person…

Hyunwoo and Jisung’s foreheads touched. Their hair tickled each other’s foreheads. And then their lips intertwined.

Hyunwoo’s eyes widened, then narrowed. His hand cupped the back of Jisung’s head. His tongue intertwined with Jisung’s through softly parted lips. Their lips overlapped perfectly, and a wet, smacking sound was heard in his ears.

His head felt dizzy from the lack of breath. But even so, he didn’t want to pull away. The hand he was holding tightened.

“…Hyung, breathe.”

A soft, gentle voice whispered. He felt like crying again. Jisung reached out and wrapped his arms around Hyunwoo’s neck. He didn’t want to show him crying anymore.

Hyunwoo hugged Jisung’s waist and leaned his forehead on his shoulder, nuzzling him.

At Hyunwoo’s affectionate behavior, like a cat’s, Jisung looked up with a resigned expression. His tear-filled eyes looked at him. And he smiled faintly. At that, Hyunwoo’s hand cupped Jisung’s nape. And,

“…I want to do it again.”

Jisung, his slightly widened eyes flickering, slowly nodded. Seeing his flushed cheeks, Hyunwoo’s lips roughly devoured his.

Yuaan, who had been walking behind the silently walking Sunwoo, quickly put on the brakes when Sunwoo suddenly stopped.

“…What do you want to drink, Hyung?”
“Oh, oh?!”

Sunwoo, who had put money into the vending machine, looked at Yuaan, waiting for his answer. Yuaan’s eyes darted around.

“Hmm… Co-cocoa!”
“Alright.”

Sunwoo’s hand pressed the cocoa button. Then a clunking sound was heard as the can fell to the floor. Sunwoo, who had consecutively pulled out water for himself and coffee for Jisung, thought for a moment and then pulled out one more coffee.

“…Are you mad?”
“Yes.”

Sunwoo answered without hesitation to Yuaan’s cautious question.

“…I’m sorry.”
“…Why are you apologizing, Hyung?”
“Huh?”

Sunwoo, holding the drinks in his arms, looked at Yuaan. Yuaan’s pupils trembled as the gaze stared directly at him.

“Well… because I made you angry…”
“No.”
“Huh?”
“Of course, I’m disappointed that you didn’t tell me the truth all this time… but this… this isn’t something you can easily talk about. I understand.”
“R-really…?”

Sunwoo frowned as he saw Yuaan’s expression brighten. ‘How could they…’ His mood sank miserably again. Experimenting on humans, he couldn’t understand it at all. He didn’t want to understand.

“This country was wrong from the very beginning.”
“…Yeah.”
“Because they don’t recognize Espers as people like themselves… that’s why they can do this, right?”
“…Sunwoo.”

Yuaan wrapped his arm around Sunwoo’s trembling shoulder. Sunwoo hugged the drinks even tighter. Yuaan, looking at Sunwoo like that, gently leaned his head on his.

“…Did you too, Hyung?”
“Huh?”
“Were you too living, waiting only for the last day?”
“…Yeah.”

Sunwoo frowned and gritted his teeth at Yuaan’s answer. He remembered when he first met Yuaan. At that time, Yuaan seemed unstable and precarious, as if he would break if touched even lightly. There was nothing but emptiness in his eyes.

It was the first time. That someone else had bothered him so much…

“But Sunwoo… after meeting you, I changed. Now, every day is just fun and good! The world you show me is full of interesting things, and there are so many delicious things… I’m happy to learn about it all!”

His brown eyes sparkled, as if filled with light. His life, which had been nothing but emptiness, had now changed. That fact calmed Sunwoo’s heart.

“…Hyung, back then, Hyunwoo-hyung didn’t have a Guide so he couldn’t do it, but how about now?”
“Huh? What…?”
“Applying for naturalization in America.”