Chapter 8: The Perils of Early Returns

…

…

Ah-ha~

Observing the beautiful woman standing at the doorway, a gentle smile gracing her lips, Zhong Tian froze, then swiftly recoiled from Li Jianren in sheer terror, retreating into the room’s farthest corner.

‘This is bad…’

Zhong Tian glanced at Li Jianren, who had completely stiffened, watching the door—and his mother—with the immobility of a stone statue.

‘Alright, cameraman, let’s get a shot of this scene.’

In the room, a lone man and woman (?), both disheveled, presented a scene uncannily similar to the playful banter between young lovers.

Of course, the content following such banter typically came with a price.

The woman who had intruded, clearly anticipating the (non-existent) “paid content,” now stood smiling silently at the doorway, her gaze fixed upon the two.

“A-a-a-ah! Why are you home so early?!”

Li Jianren shrieked, completely abandoning any pretense of composure; the sheer desperation in his voice was palpable.

“Oh, dear~ If your mother had come back two hours later, would I have been a grandmother already~”

‘Auntie, that’s a bit too much information!’

“No… that’s… Auntie, it seems you’ve misunderstood something, I’m—”

“Oh, don’t explain, no need to explain, I understand, I understand.

Teenage kids will be teenage kids, but son…” Li Jianren’s mother patted his shoulder, “Just don’t go overboard, alright?”

She then nodded, giving Li Jianren a thumbs-up.

“Hey, no, please let me explain…” He was now a mix of helplessness and panic, blaming his own good looks!

“Alright, alright, I’m going to make dinner now.

Little friend, you should stay and eat too.” The woman gave a playful smile, then exited the room, closing the door behind her and locking it from the outside.

“I won’t disturb you two.

If you want to continue, feel free~”

“Hey, hey! Mom! Why won’t you listen?! Hey!”

Li Jianren hammered on the door like a frantic dog, twisting the lock and pushing, but it was clear his mother had somehow barricaded it.

…

Staring dead-eyed at Li Jianren, Zhong Tian remarked, “This is what you get for fooling around.

Look, you’ve messed it up, haven’t you?”

“…Who knew she’d come back so early…”

“Are you a dog or something…?” Zhong Tian settled onto the bed, removed his hair tie, smoothed his somewhat disheveled hair with his hands, and then re-tied his ponytail.

“Can’t you be reliable for once?”

“…We’ll just explain it to her during dinner…”

****

…

…

…

‘This is so awkward… eating at a friend’s house, with their mother smiling while intently staring at me… incredibly awkward!’

‘You big dummy, didn’t you say you’d explain?

Why are you chickening out now?!’

Li Jianren shoveled rice into his mouth, feigning an air of nonchalance.

‘So much for ‘every man for himself when disaster strikes,’ huh?!’

With an impassive expression, Zhong Tian extended a leg and kicked Li Jianren, cursing him a hundred times in his mind.

“…Um… Auntie…”

“Little friend, what’s your name~”

Zhong Tian, just about to explain, was interrupted by Li Jianren’s mother’s question.

He paused for a moment before replying,

“Uh… my name is Zhong Tian.”

“Oh~” Li Jianren’s mother nodded, then, still smiling, asked, “Is this your first time since you started dating?”

Pfft—

Li Jianren, nearly spitting out his mouthful of rice, put down his bowl and began to cough vehemently.

Zhong Tian, equally stunned by Li Jianren’s mother’s remark, hastily waved his hands, “No, no, no…”

“It’s not your first time then?”

“Absolutely not! Auntie! Please listen… I’m a boy… a genuine boy.” To prevent Li Jianren’s mother from developing any further strange misunderstandings, he hastened his words, “I just happen to look very much like a girl!”

“Eh, a boy?” Li Jianren’s mother clearly paused, then scrutinized Zhong Tian meticulously.

“I really can’t tell, you know.

It’s not good to lie, little friend.”

“But it’s true…” Zhong Tian rummaged through his canvas bag, pulled out his ID card, and handed it to Li Jianren’s mother.

“This is my ID.”

“…He really is a boy…” Li Jianren’s mother looked up at Zhong Tian again, still appearing somewhat incredulous.

“Then I misunderstood… Hmm? Wait a minute…”

“Son, could it be that you…? Even though little Zhong is very cute, but…” Li Jianren’s mother looked at Li Jianren with a hint of alarm.

“These things really need to be mutual, you know.

Could it be that little Zhong also…? If that’s the case, then as your mother, I can only offer my support.”

“That’s enough! Please stop with your imagination, alright?!” Li Jianren finally burst out.

“No, why are you able to conjure up so many non-existent scenarios all by yourself?! He and I are good friends, good brothers, understand?

We were just messing around earlier!”

“Ah-ha…” Li Jianren’s mother gave an awkward laugh, striking a cute pose in an attempt to charm her way out of the situation.

“You two didn’t explain clearly from the start…”

“When did I even get a chance?!” Li Jianren sighed, hanging his head, looking utterly spent.