Chapter 15: A Difficult Decision

“What is the reason? Why did that Esper take the Guide and leave the Center?”

I couldn’t comprehend it. If a Guide was merely what she required, there was no logical explanation for her to abduct all twenty-three of them.

“We have yet to definitively ascertain the reason. For now, our working hypothesis is simply that she harbors a deep dislike for the Center.”

Yet, even the Director’s explanation left me with lingering questions. To characterize it as animosity toward the Center seemed incongruous, given that she had never inflicted any direct harm upon it. Had genuine resentment fueled her actions, it would have been far swifter for her to simply use her abilities on Center personnel.

‘This time, do they require a scapegoat to unearth the truth?’

“I heard a Guide vanished four years ago. Is Kim Wooyoung dead?”

“You’re aware of even that. Indeed. Four years ago, he took his own life.”

I lifted my head, the low murmur of whispers filling the air. It was pathetic to think that these same individuals had likely sat here four years prior, impotently staring at screens, just as useless then as they were now. A sharp click of my tongue instantly silenced the room, restoring the quiet.

“Even after that, several Guides vanished. And then, Espers began to go berserk in unforeseen locations.”

“Are you implying that Esper is responsible?”

“Yes, that is correct.”

“A Guide for guiding vanished, and now she’s searching for another?”

When I posed the question, a flicker of doubt in my voice, the Center Director merely shook his head, a look of resignation settling on his face as he observed my expression.

“I suspect guiding isn’t her primary objective.”

“Hah. Not a single thing is certain, it seems.”

I deliberately mumbled to myself, ensuring my words were audible. ‘Thought,’ ‘expectation,’ ‘guess’—these were not the kind of words one typically heard from the Center Director, a man known for his unwavering precision.

“Everyone connected to her has remained tight-lipped. The Chinese man that Esper Yun Junseo attacked yesterday was no different. He vehemently insisted he acted alone, without her knowledge, only to ultimately take his own life.”

“So, what is the true purpose behind revealing all of this to me?”

“…We wish to request your full cooperation. We ask that you recount everything you saw and heard yesterday, without omitting a single detail. And thereafter, we request that you completely erase all memory of those events from your mind.”

A disbelieving laugh escaped me. To reveal every secret just to prompt my cooperation, and then immediately demand I forget it all? The absurdity was staggering.

“Are you instructing me to remain silent about yesterday’s events?”

“That is correct.”

“Am I to understand, then, that the report I made to the police will also vanish?”

“Yes. Yesterday’s events will be officially reported as a mere altercation between a drug addict and a broker.”

This was something I had anticipated to a certain degree from the outset. Indeed, from the Center’s perspective, it was the only logical course of action. If, as I had reported to the police, it were to be exposed that an Esper of unknown identity was implicated in drug trafficking, gambling, and loan sharking, it would spell absolute ruin. Furthermore, the revelation that the mastermind behind all these incidents was an unregistered S-class Esper would undoubtedly unleash irreparable chaos upon society.

“Is this a request, or an order?”

“It is a request.”

“Very well. I’ll comply.”

As per the Center’s request, I recounted the events of yesterday in detail. However, I omitted the most crucial piece of information. Although their conversation had made it clear that the Esper already knew about Jaeseong, I deliberately chose not to disclose that fact. The sole witness, the Chinese man, had already vanished, and I could easily feign ignorance. I lied, framing it as an act he had ‘secretly’ undertaken to curry favor with his master.

I found myself unable to trust the Center. If they were to discover that the Esper harbored an interest in Jaeseong, it was abundantly clear they would immediately exploit the child as bait, just as they had done with Kim Wooyoung.

‘Disgusting humans.’ The individuals before me wore brazen expressions, as if they lived for the nation and for justice itself. ‘Would they truly have sacrificed their own child in such a manner?’

Only when I had finished speaking did a faint smile finally grace the Center Director’s face.

“Thank you. That was sufficiently helpful information.”

“Then, it seems it’s my turn.”

“Pardon?”

“I granted your request, so now it’s your turn to grant mine.”

At my unexpected declaration, the smile vanished from the Center Director’s face, replaced by a sudden contortion of dismay. As the Director struggled, one of the officials stepped forward to speak on his behalf.

“Esper Yun Junseo, regarding your use of abilities on a civilian earlier this morning, we will choose to overlook it. You have already received a disciplinary action once, and to commit such an act while you are supposedly undergoing self-restraint is an extremely serious matter—”

A hollow laugh escaped me at the audacious threat.

“Are you threatening me now?”

I laughed, a wry amusement, for it was precisely the reaction I had anticipated.

“Th-that’s impossible.”

“You explicitly requested that I forget everything about yesterday just moments ago. By that logic, I’ve never even been to such a place, so what exactly are you implying?”

The official, his face a mask of palpable panic, was utterly speechless. As the others began to whisper amongst themselves, causing a stir in the room, one of the four individuals I had noticed earlier suddenly spoke up.

“First, tell us what this request entails.”

“H-h-hold on, Chairman! That’s out of the question!”

“Now, now. Let’s hear him out first. It might even prove advantageous for us.”

I had been pondering it incessantly since I first heard about that deranged Esper.

Even as the Center Director continued his narrative, a singular worry persistently gnawed at the back of my mind.

‘I doubt that drug addict will ever truly recover. So what will become of Jaeseong?’

‘What on earth am I to do with you?’

The man had never properly fulfilled his role as a guardian, and now it was unequivocally clear he would be completely incapable of doing so. In that scenario, the Center would become Jaeseong’s guardian, and everyone would have a happy ending—or so I had believed until this very moment.

‘I thought simply rescuing him from that man would be the end of it.’

Yet another worry struck me. The thought of entrusting Jaeseong to the Center filled me with an unbearable dread. If, someday, the Center were to exploit him, would he truly be able to refuse?

‘Someday, like Kim Wooyoung, Jaeseong too….’

“Hah… damn it.”

‘What does my age or anything else matter?’

It mattered not what consequences the choice I made in this very moment might later unleash. I had, once again, acted on impulse.

“That child… could you not entrust him to me?”

****

Precisely three months had passed since that pivotal day. It was the forty-third day since Jaeseong and I had begun living together.

Our cohabitation, Jaeseong’s and mine, was progressing smoothly, free from any notable incidents or mishaps.

“You’re going to watch TV, aren’t you?”

He nodded.

In the interim, several changes had taken root in the living room. Foremost among them was the sizable coffee table now occupying the center of the space. I had wavered between white marble steel and black tempered glass, ultimately selecting the former, yet the table I’d purchased after such careful consideration utterly failed to please me. I had been on the verge of arranging an immediate exchange when Jaeseong’s eyes suddenly lit up. Whether it was the sheer delight of having a table where there had been none, or if he genuinely found the accursed design appealing, I couldn’t say. Regardless, that unsightly table I had been so eager to replace remains in the living room to this day.

After dinner, I handed the remote control to Jaeseong, who invariably settled in front of the television. As always, he tuned to the same channel, displaying the identical title at the top of the screen. It was the cartoon Jaeseong unfailingly watched at this hour. Even on weekend evenings, when he would re-watch episodes he’d already seen countless times, he would still, without fail, choose that exact channel.

Jaeseong, thoroughly excited, retrieved a cushion from one end of the sofa. Cradling the plush cushion in both arms, he watched the same episode—for what must have been the countless time—with an utterly blissful expression.

I had purchased cushions in three colors, but while blue and red were purportedly the most popular, the one Jaeseong consistently claimed was the black one, which I had chosen almost as an afterthought.

“Lean back and sit properly.”

He flinched.

Jaeseong, who had been watching television with the stiff posture of a plaster statue, darted a glance at me before slowly pressing his back against the sofa.

On the very first day, I had unequivocally told him to ‘sit’ and watch, but that certainly hadn’t implied perching uncomfortably on the very edge of the sofa. Jaeseong, having realized he invariably drifted off to sleep while watching TV reclined on the sofa, had at some point begun deliberately avoiding a comfortable posture.

But even an uncomfortable posture didn’t prevent him from falling asleep. At some point, he would lie down on the sofa and drift off in the exact same position. Thus, every evening, after dinner, it became my routine to move the sleeping child from the television to his room.

Once he was asleep, I would lay him across my lap and work for a long time. Then, as the cartoon he had put on neared its end, I would carry him to his room. And watching the sleeping child, I would always think the same thing.

‘Was your day ordinary today?’

The sweltering summer had given way to a pleasantly cool breeze. The muggy air had dissipated, and the noisy fan no longer whirred. Perhaps because of this, Jaeseong’s nightly nightmares had become somewhat less frequent. Such small things brought me joy. I felt a thrill in my own chest, synchronizing with the beat of his heart.

‘Why did you follow me without a word?’

As anticipated, Jaeseong’s father had barely clung to life, but his mind had not fully recovered. Upon hearing the news of his father, Jaeseong cried profusely, like any other child. Yet, those tears seemed closer to relief than sorrow.

Initially hesitant, the Center eventually granted my request. Of course, their decision wasn’t made for my or Jaeseong’s benefit. It was clearly an attempt to saddle me with a debt, to create a vulnerability where none existed. I knew this, yet I was still glad. While a few troublesome conditions were attached, I was satisfied simply with gaining custody of Jaeseong.

When the time came for Jaeseong to be discharged, I called out to him as he emerged from his hospital room.

‘Come here.’

Without a moment’s hesitation, he took my hand.

He asked nothing—not why he was coming to live with me, nor where I was taking him. Perhaps someone had already spoken to him on my behalf: Aunt, the doctor, or another nurse.

In any case, the bottom line was that Jaeseong had meekly followed me, choosing on his own to live with someone he didn’t even know. For me, the fact that he was now with me was more important than the process itself.

Rustling, he shifted in his sleep, and I tucked his blanket around him, creating a gentle breeze with my movement. Watching him fall into a peaceful slumber, I thought,

‘Today, too, I am living this life with you.’