Chapter 1: Announcing the Broth Stream

The current time was 5 PM.

I first sat down at my computer and immediately started the stream.

My regular stream time was usually between 7 and 8 PM, but I was curious to see how the viewers would react to me being a woman, so I just started early.

Stream on.
What’s next?

What else? Turn on League of Legends and get into matchmaking, of course.

‘Even if I’ve become a woman, I have to do what I have to do.’

Reaching Challenger as a top Irelia one-trick.
This was the slogan I’d used since I first started streaming two years ago. My dream and my goal.

The reality was that I was floundering in Diamond, with my career high being a measly Master tier at 100 LP.

Click.

Out of habit, I went into my profile and checked my recent match history.

Diamond II, 0 LP.
My last five games were Loss, Loss, Win, Loss, Loss.

“F*ck…”

For someone with the grand dream of Challenger, my match history and tier were catastrophic.

Of course, out of those four losses, I hadn’t done a single thing wrong.

Sure, there were times I got solo-killed and didn’t back off, instead continuing to fight and racking up 10 deaths in 20 minutes, or endlessly split-pushed under the pretext of drawing the enemy’s attention, making my team suffer.

But anyway, it wasn’t my fault.
The only reason I was in Diamond II was because of bad team luck.

Yep, that’s right.

As I queued up, chat messages slowly started to appear.

[-hi]
[-Gang-ha]
(TL Note: A portmanteau of Gangnani and hi)
[-Gang-ha Gang-ha]
[-Why are you on so early today?]
[-s*x <CleanBot has detected inappropriate language>]

So far, the chat was exactly the same as when I usually turned on my stream.

Right, so far.
The important part was what came next.

Slightly nervous, I spoke.

“Hey everyone. I just felt like starting early today. Acknowledge my diligence?”

Just yesterday, my gender was male, and though I didn’t use a cam, I streamed with a voice that was unmistakably a man’s.

So, what would be the viewers’ reaction to hearing a woman’s voice!?

[-Diligence my ass lol]
[-Acknowledge my diligence? (says the one who’s late all the time)]
[-This b*tch is f*cking crazy lol]
[-So what are you doing today?]

As expected, the viewers were the same.
Their reactions were as if they had known me as a woman from the very beginning.

If there was one tiny difference from usual, it was this.

[-If you say you started early because of a dinner date with your boyfriend, get out lol]

Given my stream’s free-for-all atmosphere, all sorts of malicious chats were common, but this was the kind of message you’d only see in a female streamer’s chat.

No, normally you wouldn’t even see that kind of malicious chat in a female streamer’s room.

But my stream was different.
I could confidently say that my stream’s chat culture, from the very beginning, was the freest compared to any other. We were the kind of people who would curse at each other without hesitation and make controversial statements without a second thought.

It seemed that even now that I was a woman, the chat culture was the same as when I was a man.

‘Hmm.’

So only my gender changed, and everything else is the same.

Then I should just stream as I normally do, right?

I searched for the ID of the viewer who made the boyfriend joke and displayed their chat log on the screen.

“Hmm… Dreaming Dragon5412. Who posted a chat like that? I don’t see it.”

[-Huk]
[-Huk]
[-Gasp]
[-lololol]
[-Our martyr ]

How dare you so casually tell a lie that could send a female streamer to her doom in one fell swoop?

I absolutely cannot let this slide.

“Not going to answer? If you don’t answer, it’s a permanent ban.”

As I kept refreshing the chat log and pressing him, a chat finally came up saying, ‘I’m sorry.’

“No, no! Not ‘I’m sorry,’ I’m just genuinely curious.”

[-Sowwy lol]
[-Scary scary scary]
[-Getting her period as soon as the stream starts lol]
[-Today’s starting off rough lol]

“Anything else to say? Huh? Answer.”

I gave the viewer one last chance.

In truth, any viewer who had watched my stream a lot would know that this situation was basically WWE.

This was also a form of content.
The viewer-roasting content. There were even guys who would intentionally provoke me, as if to say, ‘Please, just read my chat.’

Now, what will you say here?

How will you counter this move?

[-F*ck off]

“Yep, get the hell out, you b*tch!”

Click.
I immediately gave him a permanent ban.

I told you to do WWE, but you suddenly start doing UFC?

That kind of thing is a potential tumor.
Removing it quickly would be good for my stream.

Still, thanks to that b*stard, the chat room burst into a sea of laughter.

Yep, yep. A good start.
Instead of just gaming today, should I talk for a bit?

I briefly canceled the matchmaking and spoke.

“Hey guys, before I queue up, I had a weird dream today, wanna hear it?”

[-No]
[-What kind of cringe is this?]
[-Hey Mr. Kang, just queue up]
[-Stalling for time is ON]
[-Cringe]

“Actually, I don’t need your opinions. I’m gonna tell it anyway. So, I had a dream today… and guess what, I woke up and I’d become a man. Can you believe it? I was so f*cking flustered.”

[-?]
[-Weren’t you always a man?]
[-You’ve finally realized your identity, come to the transgender gallery]
[-You could probably just stream as a man and it wouldn’t feel out of place lol]

Okay.
So this is how the female Kang Bom was treated by her viewers.

It’s kind of sad…

[-How was it turning into a man? Do you want to keep living as one?]

Oh. A chat that’s actually worth having some banter with came up.

“How was it turning into a man, you ask? For some reason, it felt a little familiar, but I don’t think I’d want to keep living as a man.”

This was sincere.
I didn’t want to go back to being a man from here.

It might be baseless confidence, but I had a feeling that being a woman would somehow help my stagnant stream grow and let me earn a ton of money.

[-The fact that it felt familiar means you should really be a man]
[-Just take this chance to go to Thailand and get one attached]

“Heheh… What do you mean, Thailand?”

I couldn’t hold back my laughter.

These b*stards are ridiculous.
No matter how free the atmosphere of the room is, there’s nothing they won’t say to a female streamer.

[-Upvote if you agree it doesn’t matter since she’s not like a woman anyway lol <This message has been deleted>]

“Alright, let’s get into it today!”

I gave a temporary ban to an annoying chat and started matchmaking.

Oh right, I need to change the stream title too.

I changed the title from [Hi] to [I do not give up in difficult moments and I strive, and that is what makes me strong].

It was a famous quote from the one and only GOAT in football history, Brother Sindu.
(TL Note: ‘Brother Sindu’ is a Korean internet meme name for Cristiano Ronaldo.)

The chat room also started spamming GOAT and SIU after seeing the changed title.

They all must really like Brother Sindu!

Ching, shuk shuk shuk shuk shuk.

Not long after, a match was found.

“Ah… sh*t.”

But I ended up being first pick.

My position is top.
A top laner going first pick is a very risky move.

I immediately requested a swap with the ADC in the 5th pick slot.

“Get lost, you spoon-fed b*tch!”
(TL Note: “Spoon” or “Spoon-fed” is a derogatory term for the ADC role, implying they just get fed kills by the team.)

[-lololol]
[-There she goes again]
[-You’re going to pick Irelia anyway, so why are you asking for a swap lol]

Even if I swapped, the champion I was going to play was Irelia anyway, but I absolutely had to get the last pick.

So I don’t get counter-picked!

However.

“Uh-oh, look at this guy? He’s refusing?”

The 5th pick ADC refused the swap.

I immediately began a show of force.
Despite the grandiose term ‘show of force,’ what I was about to do was very simple.

I just hovered Nunu & Willump in the champion select and set my spells to Teleport and Ghost, let’s go.

Then, the feisty 5th pick ADC who had just refused my swap request sent me a swap request himself.

A clear sign of surrender.

“Puhuhuh… That’s right, my friend! Wouldn’t it have been better if you’d done this from the start? Why do you make me think bad thoughts?”

[-Dae-nani (Great-nani) lol]
[-Top lane average lmao]
[-Truly the GOAT of top laner’s human rights activism]
[-That’s the right way to treat a spoon lol]

Thanks to the ADC’s noble sacrifice, I was able to safely secure the last pick.

Moreover, the enemy top laner was Sion, a tank I could bully all day long.

As someone who had poured countless games into Irelia, I had a hunch.

This game was a carry angle.

But once the game actually started….

[Sion is dominating the battlefield!]

“Ah… f*ck, seriously, jungle difference!”

[-lololol]
[-An Irelia losing to a Sion, for real? lol]
[-Did you not ward?]
[-Just run it down, right? That would feel more natural.]
[-Ah, what a jungle difference (while feeding 3 deaths by level 5)]

[0/3/0]
That was my current KDA.

It was so unfair.
I was absolutely dominating at first, but then I gave up one death to a perfectly timed gank from the enemy jungler. Then, as soon as I teleported back, they ganked again as if they’d been waiting, for my second death. Then, with the lane frozen in a deadly spot, they ganked again for my third death.

How could this happen.
F*ck, are they stream sniping me?

“Hoo…”

I tried to get a grip on my crumbling mentality.

Still… still, with Irelia, it’s fine.
Whether she’s fed 3 deaths or 10 deaths, Irelia wins in the end.

That’s why I fell in love with this ridiculously powerful champion and her flashy plays!

Right, believe in the you that you believe in!

Kang Bom’s awakening, complete.

And 5 minutes later.

I slammed my fist down on the keyboard with all my might.

WHAM!

“You son of a b*****tch…! Jungler, you f*cking b*stard! How can you not come even once!?”

After graciously giving one kill to the enemy jungler and one to the enemy top, bringing my death count to five, I was finally solo-killed by Sion due to the overwhelming item difference.

In other words, I was now 0/6/0.
Dying when the jungler comes is acceptable, but being solo-killed as a top laner is a huge disgrace.

Rage boiled up in my head.

[-Idiot lol]
[-Woah woah, calm down, it was your fault lol]
[-Let’s try our best to hit 10 deaths]
[-Sir, are you doing the deaths-per-minute challenge?]
[-This is fun, this is fun lol]
[-You’re so f*cking bad lol]
[-Just got here, how’s the chat difficulty today?]

The viewers took this as their chance to provoke me.

Shouldn’t you tone it down a bit when you’re talking to a female streamer? You f*ckers.

“Nooo! Seriously, I’m right, aren’t I! The f*cking jungler never came once, and the enemy came five times, what am I supposed to do!”

[-STFU]
[-It’s your fault for falling for it all 5 times. GG.]
[-You’re blaming the jungler for this? A true top laner average lol]
[-She can’t stop hating junglers for even a day]
[-It’s just ’cause you’re f*cking bad]

“Shut up, you f*ckers! Just sympathize with me!”

Click, click.

I briefly Alt+Tabbed out of the game and started banning the provoking chats.

[-Uh oh, don’t do it]
[-She’s the one who sucks but she’s raging like a fountain of blood lmfao <This message has been deleted>]
[-On second thought, I think it is the jungler’s fault]
[-Unpopular opinion, top difference <This message has been deleted>]
[-Everyone, freeze!!!]
[-Gang-nani’s martial law, gasp]
[-To be honest, it does seem a bit unfair]
[-Everyone just type lol]
[-lol (f*ck you) <This message has been deleted>]

After making an example of a few, the chat finally returned to normal.

I don’t want to do this either.
It’s just unavoidable for the sake of a healthy chat culture.

“Haaaah… sh*t.”

That aside, my anger still hadn’t subsided.
You might ask why I get so overly invested in just a game.

But what can I do when I’m so f*cking pissed.

In a way, this seemed like the optimal mindset for a League of Legends streamer.

The first game ended in a glorious defeat, with me sh*tting blood to the score of 1/14/3.

The rest of the games were played enjoyably, chatting with the viewers as usual, sometimes throwing in some genuine curses.

Yes, just like usual.

Before I knew it, it was already 11 PM.

A good time to end the stream.
I had already been gaming for over six hours.

“Alright everyone, that’s it for today. Thanks for watching, and… oh, also.”

I suddenly remembered how I had indiscriminately banned viewers during the first game.

And they weren’t just temporary bans; they were permanent.
Usually, I would have just ended it with a timeout.

It was clearly my mistake.
I should apologize.

“For those I banned today, I’ll unban all of you after the stream ends. I’m sorry.”

Just as I finished speaking and was about to press the ‘End Stream’ button.

[-?]
[-?]
[-??]

A flood of question marks filled the chat, so I paused my mouse and read the chat.

[-Why are you apologizing all of a sudden?]
[-Did you eat something bad today?]
[-Wow, in all my life, I never thought I’d hear an apology from this b*tch]

Most of the viewers’ reactions were asking what was going on.
“Uh…”

Wait, why did I actually apologize?

Thinking about it, it was strange.
When I was a man, I had never once apologized after banning a viewer.

In the first place, the occasions where I apologized on stream were extremely rare, except for when a controversy erupted.

‘Don’t tell me.’

I had a hunch.

The fact that I was strangely vicious today… c-could this be female hormones?

The kind of thing that dyes even your mind into a female’s!?

I quickly shook my head left and right, clearing the thoughts.

“Hey, what’s with you all? You make it sound like I’ve never apologized before.”

[-Gang-ha-ha-ha-ha!]
[–_-]
[-BS lol]
[-Perhaps you don’t know the meaning of the word ‘apology’?]
[-Get lost]

“Khk… I really don’t know what you’re talking aboooout?”

Fighting back with facts, how cowardly.

I should apologize more often from now on.
Looking at it now, I seem like some kind of personality-defective monster.

[-Are you coming early tomorrow too?]

“I’ll probably be on around 7 tomorrow.”

[-Why are you leaving so early?]

“Dude, I streamed for six hours.”

[-How many points did you lose today?]

“Look it up yourself.”

Just as I was about to continue my pre-sign-off communication with the viewers.

One chat message caught my eye.

[-You were a bit strange today for sure. Are you going to change or something from now on?]

“……”

Seeing that chat, my mind suddenly went blank.

Change.
Change?
What’s going to change?

Nothing is going to change.
I’ll probably just keep chatting with viewers and playing League of Legends. I have to hit Challenger, after all.

The thing that’s changing is… absolutely nothing.

“Ah.”

Mulling over the viewer’s chat, I suddenly muttered to myself like an idiot.

Wait a minute.
Then what’s the difference between now and yesterday…?

Viewers who don’t even treat me like a woman.
Just getting tilted and playing games.
Even today’s average viewership was the same as yesterday’s.

This unchanging daily life will continue on and on.

I ask myself a question.

Have I been satisfied with myself until now?

The answer is yes.
Certainly, just yesterday, I was satisfied with myself as a streamer. Even though I made less than minimum wage, I had the pride of earning money doing what I loved.

But now.
Am I, the woman I’ve become, still satisfied?

The answer is no.
Even after becoming a woman, the viewers’ reactions are the same as when I was a man, the viewership is the same, and the donations are still f*cking nonexistent. How could I be satisfied with this?

‘Hoo….’

It wasn’t my choice to become a woman, but if things stay as they are, nothing will change.

The joy I felt at suddenly becoming a woman, the dream of wanting to breeze through life, it all becomes meaningless if I stay like this.

If so, the solution is simple.

I just have to change.

“Everyone, just a moment.”

I took a deep breath and then said, as if making a declaration.

“I’m going to change, starting today.”

[-??]
[-Suddenly?]
[-Today’s really not easy]
[-?????]
[-Sir, just end the stream already]

The viewers’ reactions were bewildered.

Hehe.
To see this kind of reaction here.

I was even more excited to see how they would react to my next words.

“Alright! Starting today, it’s Day 1 of Yuksu Urigi!”
(TL Note: The term used is Yuksu Urigi, which literally translates to “brewing broth.” In Korean streaming culture, ‘yuksu’ (broth) is slang for the sweat of obsessive fans/simps. The phrase means to intentionally cultivate a fanbase of these devoted, paying fans.)