Chapter 16: Is That The Right Answer?

Ah, right.

Everyone has to die someday. It just came sooner for me.

Though I don’t know if I’ll really die.

My intuition says maybe…

I don’t know.

Is this right?

What use is there in saving me?

Is there even a use?

Wasn’t I just a burden, a parasite?

Did my image, spitting blood in Lilac’s arms, really give her satisfaction?

Hahaha.

If only I had died in the village.

Engulfed in flames, stabbed by a dagger in the carriage.

How would that have been?

Tat tat tat tat tak.

Hurried footsteps running.

Where are you going?

Where are you taking me?

Useless. Parasite bastard.

Why are you holding onto me like this?

“Don’t lose consciousness!!”

Lilac pulled back my fading consciousness.

I want to sleep.

“Not sleeping…”

A weak voice came out.

A voice even smaller than usual.

It came from my mouth.

I knew Lilac liked me excessively.

I wasn’t that dense; I knew that much.

However, I was just worried about Lilac. Lilac, wanting to live with a sunfish like me. I thought she felt pity towards me.

Still. Still, really wanting to stay by Lilac’s side, I ate a lot and tried to build some muscle myself, moving around here and there.

I didn’t want to die like this either.

Suddenly, the days spent with Lilac flashed through my mind, making my eyes moist.

I want to live.

I thought I was just a self-centered egoist, merely concerned with staying healthy.

But now that real death is approaching, I miss Lilac.

I’m still being held, but my senses are dulling, it’s hard to maintain consciousness, and my eyes have long since closed.

I feel the sensation of being supported, but it feels like death is carrying me, yet also like Lilac is holding me.

The former is terrifying, but the latter is rather reassuring.
Because at least Lilac would be holding me warmly.

“——!!!!!!!!”

I can’t hear.

It feels like someone is shouting nearby, but I can’t hear.

What should I do?

I need to hear what Lilac is saying.

That’s the only way there might be a chance to live.

I have no strength, and my heartbeat sounds faint.

Thump. Thump.

But the sound of the heartbeat within me felt like it was shouting that it hadn’t given up yet.

“—!!!”

“—…?”

“———!!!!!!!!”

It felt like we arrived somewhere, the murmuring of people, but again, I couldn’t hear.

It just sounded like conversations happening underwater.

Rustle.

The sensation of being held left me.

No, don’t.

Until just now, I thought it was Lilac, so I was somewhat okay, but being put down somewhere brought an alien sensation, and anxiety surged.

No. Don’t go. Don’t leave me alone. I’m scared. I’ll work hard to get healthy. I won’t think selfishly anymore. I’ll stay in your arms all day. Don’t abandon me…

As Lilac’s touch left, my body seemed to shiver uncontrollably.

I didn’t know what I actually looked like or the situation, but I felt a coldness as if freezing to death.

I had no sensation, yet the feeling of something touching me was chillingly tense.

Time passed like that, I don’t know how long, and just as I felt death slowly approaching.

“Great Cure.”

A clear and precise pronunciation reached my ears.

Before the words even finished, something warm enveloped me.

A warmth comparable to Lilac’s embrace.

Wondering what it was, I tried to move my finger.

Though it didn’t actually move.

Trying to move my finger, I confirmed I had no sensation.

Am I dead?

Probably not.

If so, something similar should have happened before I was possessed.

Therefore, I’m not dead yet.

If I die, I’ll be reborn, possess someone again.

Or be completely annihilated.

Just assumptions I made.

Anyway, if my assumption is correct, I could say I’m not dead yet.

I, who had built a wall against courage, felt like I broke through it for the first time.

With the warm sensation, I cautiously opened my eyes.

My slowly clearing vision looked straight ahead.

But there was a problem.

“What the…”

Fully opening both eyes and looking around revealed a black space.

Looking closely, I could see faintly shining dots embedded within.

So, it felt like looking at space?

Floating in space.

Bewildered, I looked down at my body.

My white hair reaching my waist was the same, my legs gauntly thin, unbefitting my age.

Yes, I don’t think I’m dead yet.

Fwoooosh.

As I checked my body here and there, I felt the aura I sensed earlier.

Looking around, white and yellow lights surrounded me.

This aura felt incredibly familiar.

I didn’t quite realize it when I was first possessed here, but now I felt it clearly.

These light clusters are ‘me’.

More accurately, they were the unknown presence flowing within my body.
It felt strange to describe them as a presence, but it came naturally.

White and yellow light clusters flew around me, scattering my hair.

The light clusters spoke to me.

-You’re gonna die soon!

-Yeah, yeah. Die soon.

-Are you really gonna die?

-Don’t you wanna live?

-Play with us! We’re one!

I stared blankly at the light clusters continuously talking like children.

I don’t know what this situation is either.

However, these light clusters, each particle, took a form resembling me.

My mini-me versions.

That’s how I saw them.

“I’m not dead yet, right?”

I was certain, but just in case, I asked for confirmation.

The light clusters looked at each other, then nodded.

-Right! Not dead yet. But soon.

-Sia’s body too weak. Couldn’t receive us.

-Couldn’t handle us rampaging!

-But Saintess subdued us with divine power!

-If you wake up like this, you’ll rampage again!!

Light clusters… they looked similar to spirits, so I called them spirits.

“Spirits… I don’t understand anything you’re saying… What’s a Saintess, and what’s divine power? And what do you mean I’ll rampage if I wake up again?”

Hearing my words, the spirits gathered their heads together.

After a short while, the spirits looked at me and shouted again.

-Mommy will tell you!

-Yeah, yeah!

Mommy…?

Watching them puzzled.

[My child.]

“Whoa, startled me.”

Startled by the voice suddenly coming from behind, I jerked my head back.

Of course, turning my head wouldn’t show anything, so I turned my whole body.

And what I saw was an incredibly large white woman.

Hundreds of times larger than me, I had to crane my neck way up.

“Who are you…?”

The words came out automatically out of sheer astonishment.

Vomiting blood, fainting, ending up in a space resembling the universe, and now a divine being appearing out of nowhere.

The woman looked at me silently for a moment, then snapped her fingers.

Snap!

The loud sound vibrated through the entire universe.

‘Is she really a god…?’

I looked up again to see the woman, but no one was there.

[My child. Over here.]

This time, hearing the voice from the front, I lowered my head.

Where I looked stood the white woman from before.

Her size became similar to a normal person’s.

Still taller than me, though.

The woman approached me and spoke.

[Finally, I can see you. You awakened earlier than scheduled, but it couldn’t be helped.]

I didn’t understand what the woman was saying.

Seeing my uncomprehending expression, she spoke again, as if forgetting she needed to explain first.

[My apologies. You don’t even know what happened yet, and I got ahead of myself.]

I shrugged my shoulders as a sign that it was okay.

Here, I could walk on two feet and move freely.

“It’s okay. But I have many questions.”

[Ask anything you wish. However, I don’t know how long your physical body in the real world can endure, so we must hurry.]

I nodded at the woman’s words.

I also knew this place wasn’t reality.

The first question I started with was why I was possessed here.

[In any world. Identical souls do not exist. However, there are exceptions.]

According to the woman, souls confined to one place like Earth aren’t identical, but in parallel worlds or other dimensions, there are several similar souls.

Meaning, my soul from Earth and the girl’s soul who lived here were similar, hence the possession.

But I didn’t understand.

Why would that alone cause possession?

[Every person holds wishes in life. It’s because the wishes of the girl you possessed and your own wishes were the same.]

The woman then added something she seemed to have forgotten.

[The conditions for possession were similar souls and identical wishes. This is the first time I’ve seen such a situation.]

I watched the woman scratch her head and blink.

Her whole body was white light, so I didn’t even know if she had eyes.

After that, I asked various things.

What the girl’s name was, how she got such a body.

What the energy in my body was, and who she was.

As I asked those things, the woman who called herself a Goddess suddenly stopped talking.

[Time is up. It was good talking to a person after a long time.]

“Is that so…?”

[Fufu. If another chance arises, let’s continue our talk then.]

Saying so, the Goddess snapped her fingers.

The moment she snapped, the world shattered like glass, turning into darkness.

Then, a voice came from nearby.

“Sia!!!!”

It was Lilac’s voice.

For some reason, my body in the real world had no strength.

Thinking hard, I remembered I had lost too much blood.

“…Please open your eyes, Sia.”

A voice filled with emotion close to despair came from right beside me.

As Lilac requested, I weakly opened my eyes.

In my half-opened vision, I saw blonde hair and wet red eyes.

“Sia!!!”

Lilac, confirming my eyes were open, shot up and hugged me.

I couldn’t breathe, but still, it felt good.

Because the name of the girl I possessed in this life was also Sia.

Yes. This form is the answer.