Chapter 21: A Reluctant Bond and a New Purpose

Here we go again—another responsibility shoved onto me.
Sure, Bernell wasn’t a child like the pig-bird, needing no raising, but being saddled with him felt no different.

“He fought the nightmare well, didn’t he? Now he’s got warding powers. Isn’t that a win for you?”
Aeong rambled, oblivious to my feelings.

There were three ways to fortify defenses: using idols or wards, growing plants that repel evil gods, or employing someone with the power to fend them off.
Bernell fit the third option. He’d fought the nightmare fiercely until the dimension’s end.

‘Okay, maybe it is a win.’
I glanced at him, still staring at me blankly.

But our awkward “big brother, little sister” dynamic made things uncomfortable. I’d hoped for a cheery, service-oriented first employee with a bright smile, not this.
I was glad he was alive, but living with this unresolved tension wasn’t appealing.

“If you don’t want him, shall I put him back? Rip the dreamcatcher from his soul, maybe?”
Catsy’s tone suggested she might retract her offer as I hesitated.

The Nekomatas jumped in, egging her on.
“Back to the dimension, meow? To hunt ingredients, meow?”

“Bbiak bbiak bbiak!”

“The evil god trashed that dimension. No more cozy ones, meow. That okay?”
They hadn’t fully repaired the ravaged dimension?

“Heard you’re a good swimmer. How about fish, meow?”

“Not water, maybe underground? Earthworms, meow?”

“Catsy can’t guarantee you’ll find ingredients. You’ll wander dimensions until you do.”

“Bbiak bbiak bbiak!”
To enter Catsy’s dream dimension, I’d need to blend in as a resident—possibly as an animal or insect.
Imagining myself as a mindless, limbless creature gave me a headache.

“No, thanks. The pig-bird’s freaking out, so dimension-hopping’s off the table for now…”

“Then you’ll take him, meow?”
No escape.
Plus, debating this in front of Bernell felt tactless.

“Hmm…”
Think positive, Iwoon.
I’d faced an evil god’s creation and survived. I needed to be prepared. Bernell would be a strong ally.

“I don’t like treating people as objects, but I’ll accept him as payment. What if he doesn’t want to stay?”
What if Bernell didn’t want to be a café employee?

Aeong scoffed, as if my concern was pointless.
“He has no choice. Catsy doesn’t care about non-dream cats. There’s nowhere else for him to go.”

“…”

“Without this haven, even with warding powers, he’d wander alone and become prey for evil gods. A half-baked demigod like him is prime bait—they’d swarm.”

“Become evil god food? Better to shred him and avoid trouble, meow!”

“Shred him, meow? Sounds fun. Can I do it, meow?”
The Nekomatas’ chilling remarks aimed at Bernell made my skin crawl. Were they scaring him or guilt-tripping me?

“Alright, I get it. Bernell, would you work at the Baby Bird Café?”

“…”
He hesitated.
‘Say no, and you’re in danger.’

After a long pause, he spoke heavily.
“I don’t understand this demigod or ward talk. You say you’re not Aileen, yet I, who should’ve died, am alive… and somehow different. Does that mean I’m fake? Are you?”
His confusion mirrored my own when I first grappled with this dimension’s rules.

“Not fake… You’re living a new life as a different Bernell, a demigod, not a human.”
A second life, basically?

He lowered his gaze, pondering, then spoke softly.
“My only wish was to see Aileen again before dying.”
His intense stare was unwavering.

“I told you, I’m not that Aileen. I was just playing the part.”
If I was guilty of anything, it was method-acting to blend into the dream.

“But you showed me the Aileen I longed for.”

“I was just doing my role.”

“You lifted my burdens. When I closed my eyes at the end, I felt at peace. So, my wish wasn’t about seeing Aileen—it was about easing my guilt.”

“Whatever form it took, your love for her doesn’t change.”
Having a sibling, I could relate. If my sibling, Uijin, were comatose, partly my fault, I’d carry that guilt forever.
But Bernell’s guilt was… excessive.

“No, it was hypocrisy masked as longing. I didn’t want Aileen—I wanted her to live well without me, free of my blame.”

“Honestly, it’s not your fault. You didn’t push her into the lake.”
His guilt, seen through the dreamcatcher, was overwhelming. Why torment himself over something so complex?

“Before Mother died, she asked me to care for Aileen. I failed.”

“Why do mortals cling to such messy emotions, huh?”
Catsy spat, exasperated.

I wasn’t entirely unfamiliar with this mindset.
“Iwoon, I need to talk…”
A friend once lived fueled by self-loathing, not dreams or happiness. It wasn’t progress—it was a cliff’s edge.
They fell, in the end.

Trauma should be overcome, not embraced as a companion.
‘It’s inefficient.’
Bernell’s guilt likely began with his mother’s death, shaping him young. Aileen’s accident deepened the wound, driving him to self-punishment.

“You’ve been reborn. It’s okay to let go of your past life.”

“Forget everything?”

“It’ll be hard now, but will you live in Aileen’s shadow forever? This isn’t that dimension. Here, outside, normal rules don’t apply. To survive, you must let go.”
I did. I cried, raged, and adapted to survive, vowing to return to my dimension.
To protect my sanity, I adjusted fast.

You must too—for survival.
“You heard them. You’ve got no choice. Stay here or they’ll erase you. Isn’t staying with me better?”

“…”

“I didn’t want to say this, but wouldn’t Aileen want that? If she knew her brother was consumed by guilt, choosing oblivion, how would she feel?”
What a handful. Coaxing him this far.

“Because you were once Aileen?”

“Barely, but sure. She wanted to give her brother those berries, no matter what. If I had a brother like you, I’d want him to avoid foolish choices.”
If I weren’t the eldest, could I have lived under a sibling’s care like Aileen?

“…”
Bernell stared silently, his gaze heavy.
Just as it grew uncomfortable, he nodded.

“You’re right… I’ll stay. You’re still my Aileen.”