Chapter 26: Hey, what about the cat?

I shuddered with betrayal.

My whole body trembled violently.

Emotions I couldn’t even name—relief, disappointment, anger, sorrow—mixed like paint and spread through every inch of me.

“Cat…”

I murmured again.

Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat… over and over. Tirelessly.

Serina, who had invited me to her house, was now subtly observing my reaction.

A pure and delicate yuri beauty paying attention to someone like me was obviously wrong,

But I was too overwhelmed by betrayal to even consider her feelings.

I spoke in a voice shaking for the same reason my body was.

“…Hey, Serina?”

“Y-yeah…?”

“It’s not like I was, like, expecting a cat or anything.”

“Okay…”

“I don’t even like them that much. Seriously.”

I meant it.

Why should I care about cats?

There wasn’t a single inch of space in my brain, occupied nearly entirely by yuri delusions, to make room for some cat.

Sure, I think they’re cute—but that’s it.

As for actually having one as a pet? No thanks.

To me, the only significance cats had was as a slang term for the submissive girl in a yuri relationship.

Not that it even makes sense, since “neko” is just the sound—it has nothing to do with cats themselves…

Maybe that’s why no one really uses it anymore. Basically extinct. Only old-school yuri otaku even remember it.

Just as I was deep in the flow of thought,

A cat brushed up against my leg from the floor.

Black.

I hadn’t brought any black cat into this house.

The white one I rescued from the tree earlier was still nestled on my chest, until now, apparently.

Oh. It climbed down. Now there were two cats.

Which meant this black cat had nothing to do with me and had been living in Serina’s house all along.

I muttered, almost in tears.

“Why is there a real cat…?”

Serina seemed genuinely confused by my reaction.

“I said we’d come see a cat… didn’t I?”

“You did. That’s the problem…!”

“…Sorry…?”

Guwahhh.

No, that’s not something to apologize for!

Yeah. That was the issue.

Serina’s house…

Actually had a real cat.

…

This isn’t how it’s supposed to go.

She says, “We have a cat at home,” then, “Wanna come see it if you like cats?”—but that’s just an excuse to get me over, and then, when I ask, “Where’s the cat?” she leans in and purrs, “Meow~,” pretending to be the cat, and then immediately rubs b○obs together. That’s how it’s supposed to go, right? Right…?

Of course. Of course. It’s not like I expected that to happen or anything.

Even though I mentioned a cliché, obviously TS girls don’t count. I swear on the heavens—I have not a shred of impure intent toward Serina. I’m the type who gets guilt whiplash just from holding hands and ends up spinning my eyes in circles.

I was just here to verify how suited Serina is for the path of yuri. It just happens that I was the unlucky test subject.

But if this is the result…

What does that make all the anguish I felt on the way here? Should I run? Should I stay? If I run, will I hurt the soft heart of a delicate yuri girl? That back-and-forth agony?

That’s why I was so upset even as I felt relief.

The fact that she didn’t use the “cat tactic” on me because she liked me was honestly a huge relief.

But the fact that there’s a real cat in the house, and there was never any intent to go “meow” to seduce me—that’s what pisses me off.

“Lily?”

This girl is way too innocent.

I had no way of reading minds, of course, but I could still declare that confidently.

She’s so innocent and pure, so far removed from any sort of deviation, that the very idea of blooming love with another girl probably never even crossed her mind. At this rate, she’ll waste all her yuri potential and end up dating some guy, marrying him, and living out the worst possible ending.

And I’m the type who absolutely cannot tolerate seeing such a pretty girl end up with a man.

If that ever actually happened, I’d probably cough up blood and die on the spot.

So that’s why… it’s time to train her.

…Wait, poor word choice.

To educate her.

I decided to lead Serina down the path of yuri.

Personally.

Call me filthy if you want. But if my dirty hands can guide a pure yuri girl toward righteousness, I’m sure the Yuri Goddess will forgive me.

Anyway, as long as the result is good, right?

So from now on, I’ll teach you about s@x.

“Serina.”

“Yeah?”

“You can’t have a real cat. Not at a time like this…!”

“Why not?”

“I mean, uh… if you want to seduce a girl you like, right?”

“Someone like Lily?”

Why is my name coming up right now?

“No, I’m an exception.”

“So if I did want to seduce someone like Lily, what should I do…?”

“GUAAAAHHHHHH…”

The path of education is a treacherous one.

We’re already off on the wrong foot.

What would you even do with me if you did seduce me? Not like I’m gonna fall for it anyway.

“No. Just listen. There’s no actual cat. You say, like, ‘I’m the cat.’ And go, ‘Meow.’ That’s how it’s supposed to work…”

“Sorry. I don’t really get what you’re saying.”

“……”

I was crushed by my own cursed lack of communication skills.

I was too dumb to convince a girl who didn’t even know what it meant to bring a cat home what “Wanna go see a cat?” really implied.

But that didn’t mean I could just give up.

“So, I’m here at your place to see a cat, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m going to come back and say, ‘Huh? Where’s the cat?’ so at that moment, right at my ear, at my ear, uh, at my ear…”

“You just say ‘Meow’?”

“Eek. But not so close like you just did…”

“Meow. Meowww.”

Too cute.

Besides, that breath is way too close. It feels incredibly sexy.

What kind of ridiculous talent is this?

Maybe I’ve become too TS-corrupted to handle the yuri genius’s b@bble moves.

“Huh, huu…”

“Not sure I get it.”

“Get what?”

“Why we have to do this in the first place?”

She looked fundamentally unconvinced.

Thinking about it, that was a perfectly normal reaction, so I couldn’t really argue further.

As I mumbled awkwardly,

Serina smiled apologetically and said,

“I don’t really get why we have to pretend to be a cat. Hehe.”

“That’s because it’s just how it’s supposed to be.”

“Oh, that’s how it is.”

“Y-yeah?”

“Uh-huh…”

She could’ve just called me stupid and left it at that,

But she was genuinely trying to understand.

Ten times over, I could only say she was kind.

“If Lily shows me how, maybe I’ll get it…?”

“Huh?”

“Since it’s about seducing someone and bringing them home, if I know how it feels to be seduced, maybe I’ll understand.”

“Oh?”

She made a good point.

Right. The important part is hearing the cat’s sound from the perspective of the one being seduced.

When I nodded, Serina stepped back a little, cleared her throat, then spoke immediately.

“Hey, Lily. What about the cat?”

…But somehow, this is really embarrassing.

“Me- meow…”

“Lily. That’s not it. Aren’t you supposed to get closer and do it right next to my ear?”

“Uh, yeah, I guess so.”

“Wanna try again?”

“Uh-huh…”

For a moment, I wondered why I was getting taught instead of teaching,

But if I said that out loud, this rare chance to train her would fly away.

So I quietly approached Serina.

Like a real cat, I lowered my posture slightly and extended both hands like front paws.

I crept closer, and to meet her face, which was taller because I was bending down, I looked up.

I could see her pretty ears tucked under her brown hair along her slender jawline.

Was the skin along her cartilage slightly flushed, or was it just my imagination?

I brought my lips close to her face and then, meow…

“…”

“Serina?”

“Oh. No. So this is how it feels.”

“Now you get it. Uhuhu.”

“Lily, that’s kinda naughty…”

Huh?

Did I just hear something ridiculous?

“What’s next?”

“Uh, what did you just say…?”

“What do I do now?”

“Uh, uh?”

“This can’t be the end.”

Uh, yeah, probably.

Honestly, I have no clue either.

Maybe we go to the bed or something?

Then rub b○obs wildly because you seduced me first, so I’ll do whatever you want. If you make a cocky cat act all purr-y…

No, no, no, no, that’s not it.

No matter what, I don’t plan to go that far.

I only taught you this much so you could use it on other girls later.

“Is it enough just to treat her like a cat?”

“Hyaaah?!”

Don’t suddenly tickle my chin.

I’m not a cat that purrs because it feels good.

“Lily. Can you stay still?”

“No, that’s not it. Hey, Serina—”

“Shh. Don’t get wild, okay?”

“…”

What is happening?

I froze, stunned by the sudden change.

Then Serina suddenly started stroking my back.

“Kyaa…”

“You have to behave at my house, Lily.”

“Y-yes…”

“Good girl.”

Don’t stroke my head…!

“Since my parents aren’t home today, let’s play as much as we want…?”

“…Y-yeah?”