Chapter 27: An Unsettling Change

Somehow, Sayoreinne had managed to mend her relationship with Nell. They were now, she supposed, friends.

She still couldn’t quite comprehend it. She hadn’t expected Nell to accept her apology so readily. Sayoreinne had been prepared for a long process, planning to face Nell every day and slowly chip away at the resentment. Expecting forgiveness after a single apology was naive, the kind of thinking only possible with a head full of sunshine and rainbows.

She had initially assumed Nell hadn’t accepted her apology at all. But then, somehow, in the blink of an eye, everything had changed. Not only had Nell forgiven her, but their relationship had progressed by leaps and bounds, catching Sayoreinne completely off guard. She had anticipated a protracted effort, lasting until the third semester, but the situation had resolved itself swiftly and unexpectedly, and in the best way possible.

It was still a mystery. ‘Why did things go so smoothly?’

“What are you thinking about so deeply?”

“Oh? My apologies. How rude of me to get lost in thought while you’re right in front of me.”

Sayoreinne released the strand of hair she had been twirling around her finger and picked up her spoon. Glancing at Nell, she saw that Nell had already finished most of her meal. ‘Was I lost in thought for that long?’ Sayoreinne eyed her own nearly full plate and began shoveling food into her mouth, determined to catch up.

She felt Nell’s gaze on her, making her feel like she might choke.

“Please, eat slowly and chew your food properly. We still have plenty of time left for lunch.”

“……Um. Yes. Thank you.”

Sayoreinne swallowed the mouthful of food before replying, feeling slightly bewildered. She still couldn’t quite grasp Nell. Even now, Nell wasn’t mocking her lack of table manners but expressing concern. Given Nell’s personality, Sayoreinne hadn’t expected mockery, but concern?

‘What is going on?’

Some time had passed since Nell had agreed to be her friend. Although Sayoreinne no longer needed to make her daily pilgrimage to the library, she still visited every day at Nell’s request. Meeting Nell, having lunch together, and spending time with her had become part of Sayoreinne’s routine.

She still couldn’t understand why Nell, the target of her past bullying, would want to see her every day and treat her with such friendliness. Strictly speaking, perhaps it wasn’t outright friendliness, but considering their past relationship, it was certainly amicable.

It felt too simplistic to assume Nell was just kind and forgiving, willing to overlook everything for the sake of avoiding awkwardness…

And Nell’s almost proactive behavior, coupled with her newfound fluency and confidence, was still jarring. Of course, seeing Nell more assertive wasn’t a bad thing. In fact, it was quite pleasant…

‘Well, all’s well that ends well.’

She decided to stop questioning it. It wasn’t a negative development, quite the opposite, in fact.

After lunch, they returned to the library and spent the remainder of their lunch break enjoying tea in the staff lounge. The tea provided by the library was nothing special, and Nell’s tea-making skills were equally average, but neither of them were particularly discerning when it came to tea.

‘But why does she always…?’

Nell sat right next to Sayoreinne as they drank their tea. She always chose the seat beside Sayoreinne, rather than sitting across from her. Wasn’t it more normal to sit facing each other? It wasn’t that Sayoreinne minded Nell sitting so close, but it felt… overwhelming, almost intimate.

Lately, she had been feeling awkward about physical contact with other girls. The warmth and softness were pleasant, of course, but the overriding sensation was one of shyness. This hadn’t been the case before…

‘This is too much…’

The simultaneously overwhelming and heart-fluttering tea time concluded, and Sayoreinne spent a couple of hours in the library before bidding Nell farewell and returning to her dorm.

These peaceful days passed quickly, and before she knew it, the break was nearing its end, and the start of the third semester was just around the corner.

Sayoreinne decided to spend the last day of break relaxing in her dorm.

“Mmm…”

“Miss, it’s lunchtime. You should wake up and eat.”

It was the first time Ahrin had seen Sayoreinne so languid and relaxed. Her mistress usually woke up at the same time every day, though she occasionally slept in an hour or two on her days off. Seeing Sayoreinne lounging in bed, still drowsy even after waking up, was unusual. She was used to seeing her mistress composed and graceful, the picture of an elegant noble lady. This relaxed, almost vulnerable side was new.

“Alright…”

At Ahrin’s persistent urging, Sayoreinne finally dragged herself out of bed. Her hair was disheveled, her face relaxed and unfocused, her eyes blinking sleepily. Ahrin found this unfamiliar side of her mistress rather endearing.

She knew she shouldn’t think such thoughts about the lady she served, but the feeling was there nonetheless.

Ahrin began tidying up the bed as Sayoreinne slowly made her way to the bathroom.

After lunch, they returned to the room. Ahrin prepared tea for Sayoreinne, who took a sip or two before slumping back onto the sofa, practically melting into the cushions.

Sayoreinne used to frequently pull Ahrin close for cuddles on the sofa, but lately, that hadn’t been the case. Observing Sayoreinne’s recent behavior, Ahrin couldn’t help but wonder, though she tried to dismiss the thought, if Sayoreinne had grown tired of her.

Meanwhile, Sayoreinne was simply enjoying the rare moment of relaxation, her mind wandering.

Something felt… off.

Lately, physical contact with girls had become uncomfortable. She should be enjoying it, and while it wasn’t unpleasant, the dominant feeling was one of shyness.

She had always maintained a flawless, graceful facade in public, but now, all she wanted to do was laze around and indulge in her newfound indolence, letting her guard down and revealing her vulnerabilities.

Moreover, she had recently become aware of a strange discomfort, a sense of unease in her own body. Specifically, in her chest…

‘I think I know the reason…’

She had been noticing subtle changes for a while now. For instance, she no longer used formal speech in her internal monologue, a habit ingrained in the original Sayoreinne.

And when she was alone, she would sometimes slip into masculine habits and mannerisms. It was as if ‘Juseong’ and ‘Sayoreinne’ were separating.

This sensation frightened her. Separating? What would happen if they fully separated? Would she be expelled from this body, deemed an incompatible soul? Or would the other personality disappear, since she was currently in control? Perhaps nothing would happen.

Maybe it was just a feeling, a fleeting sensation. She didn’t even know what ‘separating’ truly meant. It was simply the first word that came to mind when she experienced that strange sensation.

It could be temporary, but the uncertainty, the lack of knowledge, was terrifying. Her entire situation was a mystery. Waking up in the world of a game, possessing the body of the villainess… anything was possible. She couldn’t take anything for granted. There was no precedent for her situation, no guidebook to consult.

‘Haah… I don’t know. I need to rest.’ As always, her worries were pointless, leading to nothing but headaches and anxiety, offering no solutions.

Sayoreinne stretched out on the sofa, burying her face in a cushion. It was the first time in a long time that she had truly relaxed, letting go of all her worries. If this was just a temporary reprieve, she didn’t want to think about when she would next be able to indulge in such laziness. She just wanted to empty her mind and sleep. With that thought, she closed her eyes.

This feeling of carefree indolence, though recent, felt like a distant memory. Perhaps it wasn’t so bad after all.

As she drifted off to sleep, she thought, ‘There are no status windows, no fairies, no constellations, no gods to offer guidance… All I can do is wait.’

Strangely, she felt no anxiety.