Chapter 27 : You, whom I met again (2)

Love is such a happy and mysterious emotion.

The only thing that changed was you coming to my side, yet such a heart-pounding ecstasy flows through my entire body.

Bubble bubble.

A delicious aroma rises from the pot.
It was Samgyetang, boiled with chicken, bellflower root, jujubes, white rice, and so on.
*(TL Note: Samgyetang is a traditional Korean ginseng chicken soup.)*

Smiling, I prepared the meal.

Caspar’s stomach must be empty since he woke up not long ago.
He must be hungry.
Since I needed to eat too, I would prepare a generous portion for three.

My prior cooking practice paid off here.
Indeed, my efforts weren’t in vain.
Thinking that, I cooked cheerfully.

The Samgyetang was already cooked, just needed heating, the side dishes were more important.

Just follow the recipe.
Yes, just follow the recipe.

“…Agathe. Are you okay?”

“Yes?”

Tilting my head, I turned to look at Caspar.
His gaze felt like he was looking at a child left near the water’s edge.

If someone else looked at me like that, I would have been angry, but since it was Caspar, I wondered if I had done something wrong.

“Um. You weren’t very good at cooking before. And you seem to have a maid, can’t you just ask someone else to do it?”

Ah. Right.
I really couldn’t cook back then.

But I practiced a lot since then, so I’m quite decent now.

“Hmph. I practiced a lot too. Since it’s for my dear husband, I want to do it myself. Besides, it’s the first meal you’re having after we met again, I can’t ask a subordinate to do it.”

I deliberately puffed out my cheeks and grumbled slightly.
Caspar blinked, then inadvertently let out a word.

“…Dear husband?”

Oops.

“Ah. Umm… Sorry. I overstepped.”

I had gotten married to Caspar so many times in my head that I momentarily forgot.

…We. Aren’t married yet.

Though the chaotic situation wasn’t suitable for marriage, there were actually several opportunities.
Wasn’t he the one to whom I offered my first time in a world where premarital chastity was rather important?

Caspar proposed to me before, but my foolish self rejected him repeatedly.

Anyway. Why did my past self act so foolishly?
I would have been happy just obediently serving my husband and being devoted to the family.

“No. It’s because I like it. Agathe. While I haven’t seen you… Yes. You’ve become much cuter.”

At those words, forgetting I was cooking, I giggled foolishly and almost dropped the kitchen knife.

Cute.

It felt like the efforts I made until now to become a good wife were bearing fruit.

…Honestly. I wish he would propose again.
Because now, I’m ready to receive anything Caspar gives me.

Still.
Everything has an order.

We’ll proceed slowly like this.

***

-Clatter.

I arranged the finished dishes on the dining table.
Delicious food, steaming hot, filled the entire table.

“Enjoy, your meal. Caspar.”

Then I knelt gracefully beside Caspar.

I still wore the apron.
Clean, without a speck of dust or oil, the apron was worn more for appearance than practical use.

I could catch flying bullets with my bare hands; there was no way I couldn’t block mere oil splatters.
This was purely for setting the mood.

A naked apron would have been nice too.
But that’s too blatant.
Still, it might be worth trying next week.

While I indulged in happy fantasies, Caspar quickly devoured the food.
It seemed his old habit of eating during battle still remained.

Well. From Caspar’s perspective, not even a few days would have passed.
It’s understandable.

“Haa… Delicious. Really. How long has it been since I last ate meat…”

I attended to Caspar beside him.
Doing something I would have trembled with terrible humiliation doing before, doing it willingly now, felt strangely and deeply transgressive.

He keeps eating only meat.
I know he dislikes greens, but I wish he’d eat the seasoned vegetables too.

“No, eggplant is a bit…”

…What’s wrong with seasoned eggplant?

Hmm. Actually, I don’t eat it either.

Argh. I debated between making fried eggplant or seasoned eggplant; should I have just fried it then?

“You shouldn’t be picky. You need to set an example for the kids later.”

“…Kids?”

“Don’t you… want them? You said before you wanted many children.”

My mouth felt slightly dry.
I thought it wouldn’t happen, but.
Still, I asked, just in case.

“No. Um. I don’t dislike the idea. Just, feels a bit sudden.”

Mmmhmm. Indeed, ‘don’t dislike it’.

Is this also a matter that requires some time?
Right, let’s not be hasty.

You’ve endured well so far. Agathe.

“Ah. But there’s something I wanted to ask. No, actually quite a few things.”

Caspar hesitated, then asked me.
I bowed my head politely and responded.

“Yes. Please speak.”

“…How did you return to your homeland? And, my resurrection too. It’s okay if you don’t want to answer.”

It was just a slightly complicated story; I didn’t particularly want to hide it from Caspar.

The only thing a wife should hide from her husband is a surprise gift.
That’s what I learned.

Still. Should I perhaps omit the parts Caspar might find unpleasant?
Since we’re eating.

“Hmm… Where should I begin?”

With a bittersweet smile, I slowly began the story after Caspar’s death.

The story of how the last remaining survivor group rapidly began to collapse after you died, and how incompetent I was at the center of it.

The story of how, after most people died, I became endlessly obsessed with your resurrection.

The story of completely losing my mind and dreaming of happiness in delusions.

The story of finally giving up on everything except saving Enhen, living like a dead person, guarding only your corpse.

And… the story of reaching a happy ending simply through good luck.

“Yes… That’s how it happened. Through that process, I realized my foolishness and shortcomings. I was just, merely a worthless girl.
Acting high and mighty without knowing my place, that’s why I suffered such a miserable fate. Just. Lucky. That’s the story of such a worthless woman.”

As I smiled bitterly, engaging in self-deprecation, further chipping away at my already rock-bottom self-esteem, Caspar frowned and refuted my words.

“…No. You are not such a worthless person.”

This time, you are mistaken. I am indeed that petty and lowly woman.

Because I wanted exactly that reaction from you.

Since my face isn’t thick enough to say it directly, just wishing you would notice.

So I deliberately lowered myself.

Asking you to hold me.

Asking you to comfort me.

“Agathe. Don’t do that. Please don’t hurt yourself.”

Perhaps. I’m already covered in scars, so even a slight twist of my body makes the wounds ache. If anyone else had said that, I might have flared up in anger for no reason.

Right? Now only scars remain. There’s nothing to show you except boasting about my misfortune like a medal.

Because if I dig deeper into my scars, then maybe you’ll look at me more. That seems to be why.

It seems I just couldn’t face you nonchalantly.

So. Still. Just hold me.

Because…

“Because you’re already covered in scars. I don’t want you to hurt anymore. Agathe.”

My beloved’s voice echoed.
I agreed for the exact same reason.
Though the conclusion reached might be the opposite.

‘Already. Covered in scars.’

Anymore.

I don’t want to hurt.

“That’s right. So… Can you embrace me? So tightly that I can’t escape anywhere, can’t attempt any challenge or face any failure… Strongly.”

Then it won’t hurt either.

“No. I have no hobby of appreciating birds in cages. I have no intention of restraining you.”

Caspar’s answer was very much like him.

.
.
.

It was a confession chosen after deliberation, imbued with a somewhat wistful atmosphere.
A romantic confession, pledging to dedicate all my remaining possibilities to you for life, devoting myself entirely only to you.

It would have been, if Caspar hadn’t broken the mood.

“Agathe. That last phrase. Seems a bit much. Isn’t that disrespectful to housewives raising children? Raising kids must be a considerable challenge too.”

I pouted and grumbled.

Tch. It was an indirect confession.
He doesn’t understand a woman’s heart.

“…Just saying. I have a challenging spirit too, you know. Would having about 10 be enough? Though I need to handle Enhen’s matter first.”

“Um. Even I feel a bit burdened by that much. No, besides, that’s not what I meant by challenging spirit…”

“Pfft. Ah. Sorry. I was joking. I dragged the story on too long while we were eating.”

Covering my mouth as I laughed, I bowed my head slightly, revealing a hint of cleavage.
Seeing Caspar’s gaze naturally drift there, I chuckled inwardly.

Ah. Men really are kids even when grown up. Easy to read.

Then, smiling with my eyes, I swept my long silver hair behind my ear.

“…Caspar. For dessert, how about me?”

Like the physically healthy man he was, Caspar did not refuse.

***

After a whole night had passed.
I kissed my sleeping lover’s arm and gazed at him with loving eyes.

You, whom I met again.
Bestowed upon me a blessing sweeter and more brilliant than ever before.

A blessing named happiness.

‘Well… There were other things too, though.’

Blushing, I caressed my lower abdomen.
Traces of last night’s intense lovemaking still seemed to linger.

…Since there’s still much work left, I should probably use contraception.