Chapter 37: A Shared Secret and a Public Kiss

The Ferris wheel descended slowly, the city lights flowing beneath their feet like a continuous river of light. Yet, within the gondola, the air seemed to have solidified, leaving only Xia Yue’s bewildered whisper about ‘liking’ to quietly echo, alongside the unprecedented, shattered-ice confusion in her eyes.

Jin gazed at her, at the honor student magical girl who always appeared calm and composed, as if everything were under her control, yet now seemed as vulnerable as a lost child.

Xia Yue’s monologue about ‘excellence,’ ‘duty,’ and ‘optimal solutions’ served as an unexpected mirror, reflecting something deep within Jin’s own heart that she had deliberately ignored.

Her hand, covering Xia Yue’s, distinctly felt the coolness of her skin and the subtle tremor beneath. Taking a deep breath, Jin resolved to no longer conceal the secret that even she herself found terrifying.

“Xia Yue…” Jin’s voice was soft, imbued with a resolute calm. “You asked why I’m such a ‘strange’ person… The truth is, I don’t know either.”

Xia Yue lifted her gaze, her ice-blue pupils still holding a trace of confusion, but now infused with a deeper, more focused attention.

“I…” Jin paused, seemingly weighing her words, her gaze distant, as if piercing through the gondola to some ethereal horizon. “I have no memories of my past. At least, none of what you would call ‘normal,’ complete memories.”

Xia Yue’s brow furrowed almost imperceptibly.

“My memories, it seems, only began two years ago, the moment I woke up in this city.” Jin’s lips curled into a bitter arc. “Everything before that is a complete blank. Not blurry, but utterly… void.”

She felt Xia Yue’s hand stir faintly.

“Every time I try to force myself to remember, to touch that blankness…” Jin’s voice carried a hint of imperceptible fear. “I get no images, no sounds, only… a violent headache, and a sensation… a feeling like I’m being torn apart, swallowed whole. It’s complex, filled with regret, sorrow, anger, and so many other things I can’t articulate… but all of it is excruciating, terrifying.”

She lifted her head, meeting Xia Yue’s eyes directly. Those eyes, usually tinged with timidity and evasion, were now filled with candor and… a deep-seated terror.

“I don’t know who I was before. I don’t know if I’m… as that Violairella said, a ‘traitor,’ a ‘fire-stealer’?” Her voice trembled slightly. “I don’t even know if I’m some… infamous, bloodthirsty evil witch from history? I… I don’t know anything.”

“There’s only one thing I do know,” her tone grew exceptionally firm, a belief like a lifeline in the midst of void and terror. “I have to survive. At all costs, I will hide myself and live.”

“So,” a self-deprecating, almost sorrowful smile touched Jin’s lips, “I started to ‘act.’ To play the role of an ordinary high school girl: a physically weak student, with average grades, a little clumsy, occasionally prone to crushes… the ‘Kazami Jin.’ I observed others, mimicking their expressions, their tones, their reactions. I learned how to smile naturally, how to cry to evoke pity, how to act cute without being annoying… I painted myself with layer upon layer of ‘protective coloration.’”

She looked at Xia Yue, her gaze complex.

“Just like you, using ‘excellence,’ ‘calmness,’ and ‘efficiency’ as your armor. I, too, use ‘ordinariness,’ ‘weakness,’ and even… ‘clumsiness’ as my disguise. We both… arm ourselves in ways we believe are safe, striving… to survive in this world that is far from secure.”

“Until just now, hearing you say all that…” Jin’s voice softened, filled with a sudden realization and a strange resonance. “I only now realized how… similar we truly are.”

“Both of us are afraid.”

“Both of us wrap a hard shell around the real self within… the one who gets lost, who feels bewildered.”

As her words faded, a profound silence descended upon the gondola. Only the faint hum of the machinery and the distant urban drone from outside the window remained.

Xia Yue watched Jin, motionless, an unprecedented tempest swirling in her ice-blue eyes. Shock, understanding, sympathy, resonance… countless complex emotions intertwined and collided within her gaze.

She had always tried to analyze Jin with logic, to comprehend this ‘anomaly’ that disturbed her composure. She had calculated countless possibilities, yet never once considered that the truth could be so… weighty, and so… similar.

It turned out that beneath those seemingly disparate exteriors lay souls equally restless, equally searching for the meaning of their own existence.

The ‘optimal solution’ she had always pursued, the ‘unnecessary emotions’ she had always suppressed, the ‘loss of control’ that had always perplexed her… in this moment, all seemed to find a vague, yet undeniably real outlet.

Not a mistake.

Not a deviation needing correction.

But rather… the resonance of two lost souls, instinctively drawn to and recognizing each other in the darkness.

Slowly, ever so slowly, she withdrew the hand Jin had covered.

Then, under Jin’s somewhat startled and disappointed gaze, she opened her arms, and with an almost clumsy yet undeniably forceful embrace, she pulled the girl before her—who was similarly wrapped in thick layers of disguise, yet whose heart was a barren wasteland of fear—tightly, tightly into her arms.

Jin’s body stiffened instantly, then softened.

Xia Yue gently rested her chin on Jin’s shoulder and closed her eyes. She could feel the slenderness and subtle tremor of the body in her embrace, and she could also feel her own heart, which had always beaten with a steady rhythm, now throbbing with an unfamiliar, intense pace.

The frozen shell, in this embrace, shattered with a crash, melting into a trickling warmth that flowed bittersweetly through her limbs.

She finally understood.

Understood why she had been uncontrollably drawn to this person who was ‘at the bottom in every aspect.’

It wasn’t because of any quantifiable data, nor any rational judgment.

It was simply because…

They were kindred spirits.

Kindred spirits who, in their boundless solitude and disguise, had finally caught each other’s scent.

“…Mm.” Xia Yue uttered a faint, almost inaudible response, tightening her embrace even more.

****

The Ferris wheel came to a steady halt on the ground, and the gondola door opened once more.

But this time, neither of the embracing figures moved.

The world outside was still noisy, and the path ahead remained shrouded in mist and threats.

Yet, in this small, secluded space, two souls who had shed all their disguises, for the first time truly and without reservation, embraced each other.

And embraced the true, vulnerable self that had always been hidden beneath a hard shell, yet still strived to live.

The Ferris wheel car door slowly slid open, and the clamor of human voices and cheerful music from outside surged in like a tide, instantly filling the tranquil, isolated space that had just been. Xia Yue almost immediately released her embrace, pulling back slightly.

However, just as Jin expected everything to return to normal, for the familiar, cold Xia Yue to reappear, she froze.

Xia Yue’s face no longer held its usual, unwavering calm, like a precise instrument, nor the vulnerability and confusion she had shown moments before when shedding her disguise.

In her ice-blue eyes, the shattered ice had melted, transforming into a pool of spring water shimmering with gentle starlight.

Her lips curved upward slightly, forming a clear, genuine smile, tinged with a hint of shyness, but more so with relief and warmth. It wasn’t an imitation, not a calculated optimal expression, but a natural outflow from the depths of her heart.

She looked at Jin, her gaze soft, imbued with an unprecedented focus that could almost drown a person.

Then, under Jin’s still bewildered gaze, Xia Yue leaned in slightly, one hand gently cupping Jin’s cheek. Her fingertips were cool, but her touch was as soft as a feather’s brush.

A kiss, like a butterfly alighting on a petal, tentative and precious, yet unmistakably tender, softly touched Jin’s lips.

It was very light, very brief.

Yet, it was like a warm electric current that instantly pierced through all of Jin’s thoughts.

Jin’s mind went blank for a moment, then an indescribable warmth surged from her heart, drowning out her previous panic, unease, and all complex emotions. She didn’t flinch, didn’t show surprise; she simply closed her eyes obediently, savoring that brief moment of tenderness, and then, with equally gentle strength, softly embraced Xia Yue in return.

In this moment, words were unnecessary.

Under the Ferris wheel, people came and went, lights sparkled. No one noticed the subtle yet significant change that had just occurred in front of this ordinary gondola that had just reached the ground.

Except for… a certain tourist who happened to raise their phone, adjusting the angle to capture a night view of the Ferris wheel.

“Click.”

A faint shutter sound was swallowed by the surrounding noise.

****

Minutes later, a post with a photo quietly appeared on St. Sakura Academy’s internal forum and several local social media platforms, quickly garnering likes and shares.

The photo’s composition was somewhat coincidental; the background featured the glittering Ferris wheel and blurred streaks of people, but the focus perfectly captured the figures of two girls embracing and kissing in front of the gondola door. Although the pixel quality wasn’t extremely high, Xia Yue’s distinctive blue hair and cool profile, along with Jin’s familiar slender back and partial profile, were enough for those who knew them to recognize them at a glance.

The title was even more tantalizing:

[Shocking! St. Sakura’s Ice Queen, Senior Xia Yue, and a mysterious girl share a romantic kiss at the top of the Ferris wheel! Is this an official announcement?!]

The accompanying text read: Ahhh, I witnessed it with my own eyes! Just now! Under the Ferris wheel! Senior Xia Yue was smiling so gently! The other girl was super cute too! They hugged and kissed! I’m deceased! [Heart][Heart][Heart]

The comments section instantly erupted.

“Holy crap?! Seriously?! Senior Xia Yue?! The student council president?!”

“The other one is… Kazami Jin? The one who’s always with Senior Lin Wan?”

“Case closed! So Senior Xia Yue likes this type?!”

“KSWL! Cold academic x Soft, cute girl! What a divine ship!”

“The person who took this photo, you’re my god! What an angle!”

“@LinWanV @YuNiannianV Come see! Your Jin-bao has been kidnapped!”

“Don’t tag randomly, upstairs, what if they fight…”

“Am I the only one who thinks this scene is beautiful? The lighting and atmosphere are amazing!”

…

When Jin was almost simultaneously bombarded by frantic messages from Lin Wan and Yu Niannian, she clicked the attached link and saw the wildly shared photo. Her entire body flushed crimson, from head to toe, like a boiled shrimp.

“Ah—!!!” She let out a short wail, clapping her hands over her face, wishing she could burrow into a crack in the ground right then and there. What, what was this?! A public social death scene?! She and Xia Yue… kissing… and it was photographed and uploaded online?! Now the whole school, no, probably the whole circle, knew!

This was absolutely the darkest black history of her life since her transmigration! No exceptions!

She secretly peeked through her fingers at Xia Yue beside her. Xia Yue had clearly also received the messages; she was looking down at her phone screen, but her face showed no signs of embarrassment. On the contrary… the gentle curve of her lips seemed to deepen? She even extended a fingertip, lightly enlarged the photo, and examined it carefully.

Then, under Jin’s horrified gaze, Xia Yue looked up at her, her ice-blue eyes filled with clear amusement and a hint of… slyness?

“Nicely taken,” Xia Yue commented calmly, as if discussing an ordinary landscape photograph.

Jin: “!!!”

Nice?! What was nice about it?! This was clearly a public execution!

Seeing Jin on the verge of dying from shame and indignation, the amusement in Xia Yue’s eyes deepened. She put away her phone, naturally took Jin’s hand (a gesture that elicited another round of suppressed gasps and phone clicks from those around them), and spoke in a quiet voice, yet with an undeniable frankness:

“Let’s go.” She paused, then added, as if stating the most natural fact, “Anyway, there will probably be many more such incidents in the future.”

Kazami Jin: “…”

She looked at Xia Yue’s profile, which had regained its calm, yet whose eyes were brimming with laughter, then felt the countless curious, envious, or excited gazes from around them, and the constant barrage of new message notifications on her phone…

It was over.

Her ‘ordinary’ high school life, it seemed, was completely gone forever.

And her black history… had accumulated another entry.

However…

The hand held tightly by Xia Yue conveyed a firm, warm strength.

Perhaps… it wasn’t so hard to accept after all?

At least, the other main character in this ‘black history’ was someone she was willing to face all future unknowns with.

Jin, blushing and looking down, quietly, yet firmly, intertwined her fingers with Xia Yue’s.

So what if it was social death?

After all, she had her by her side.