Chapter 5: The Star of the Magpie (5)

“We’re off~”

“Have a good time, both of you. Don’t play games for too long. We need to talk when you get back, Jinhyuk.”

We left, seen off by my father. My sister seemed a little serious. I didn’t bother asking why; it was too much effort. My father’s words bothered me more. Well, it was natural. This wasn’t a personal issue; there were things we needed to discuss.

Like what to do about school, how I would live… things I couldn’t decide on my own. Because of what happened, there were things we had to talk about, whether I liked it or not.

The downtown area came into view. The apartment where I live is located in the heart of Suwon, so it’s surrounded by everything from large supermarkets to all sorts of shops. The subway station is only a few minutes’ walk away, making it very convenient. I don’t know where the lingerie stores are, but I’m sure I could find one in any large supermarket.

However, my sister headed towards the shopping district instead of the supermarket. It was more convenient for me since the PC bang was nearby.

“Uh, wait…”

Before I could compose myself, my sister opened the door to a store.

A supermarket or a PC bang would be fine, but a proper store in the main shopping district requires a deep breath and a moment to prepare myself before entering. A lingerie store, especially, needs at least a five-minute grace period.

These stores have too much feminine energy, making it difficult to even step inside. Low-feminine-energy sl*ts are trash. The only valuable ones are the neat and beautiful Yamato Nadeshiko. In other words, Umi-chan.

“What’s ‘feminine energy’? Stop with the weird talk and come inside, oppa… I mean, unni.”

“Ah, sh*t.”

Realizing her mistake belatedly, she covered her mouth. I… I had been practicing talking with my air friend so diligently that my thoughts naturally bypassed any filters and spilled out.

“Huh? Should I call you ‘oppa’ outside then? I can deal with being called ‘unni,’ but I don’t want to be treated like I’m crazy too.”

“Ah, fine, only outside then. If you call me that at home… uh…”

“Fine. Why would I fight with you?”

A straightforward answer. Come to think of it, I had no leverage over my sister. Hearing my sister’s perfectly reasonable response, she grabbed me, who was standing there like an idiot, and dragged me into the store. Realizing that the clerk was looking at us strangely, I quickly followed her inside… huh? Ah… this is so annoying. I kept walking, and…

Thud.

…I tripped and fell, my feet tangling.

I had forgotten that my shorter legs made walking difficult. I managed to catch myself with my hands, avoiding a face-plant, but I was mortified. Thanks to the padding in my bra, the impact wasn’t as bad as I thought, but the emptiness below my waist made me feel uneasy.

Ah, wait, ah…

I tried to ignore a passing kid who shouted in a clear voice, “Mommy! That unni’s panties are showing!” as I took my sister’s hand and got up. Ugh, my knees hurt.

“Ouch…”

“Are you okay? Are you bleeding?”

My sister brushed off the dust from my clothes. Fortunately, nothing seemed torn or broken. Knowing my situation, my sister didn’t say anything and pulled me along.

“Are you alright, miss?”

“Ah… yes.”

I answered the clerk’s perfunctory question and glanced at my sister. I wanted to choose something quickly and get out. It’s not like I have a lingerie fetish. While I adjusted the straps of my dress and smoothed out the wrinkles, my sister talked to the clerk. It was something along the lines of, “She’ll try some on, can we get her measurements?” The clerk then gestured for us to follow her.

It’s obvious I’m an A-cup or smaller, is there even a point… wait, did that b*tch put padding in my bra? What the–?

“Please remove your bra so we can get accurate measurements.”

“Ah, it’s okay, I’ll do it myself. I mean, I know my size, so…”

I stammered. D@mn, I must have looked awkward. But if I refuse at this point, clerks usually don’t force the issue. As expected, the clerk put down the measuring tape and went back outside the fitting room, adding a few words.

“Alright, miss. Should I bring out some according to the padding size?”

Ah… she knew. I guess if you work in a store like this, you can tell just by looking. I was being treated like a childish kid trying to look grown-up. My face flushed. This is all because of that d@mned sister of mine. No, it’s my fault for whining that it was too big and uncomfortable… Why do you even have padding?

“Alright, I’m going.”

“I’m worried… Do you really have to go to the PC bang? You can play at home.”

“I’m going to get the event items, I’ll be back soon. Within an hour.”

Touching my flat chest, I tried to persuade my sister. I understand her concern. If a girl causes trouble, gets into a fight, or something bad happens, even if we’re like strangers, we live in the same house, so she can’t just ignore it. But I’m just going to play games quietly, so there won’t be any problems. Probably.

League of Legends Warning

I opened Dungeon Fighter Online to get the PC bang event items, then naturally opened League of Legends.

I desperately wanted to rip off my bra and throw it away, and the weight of my long hair reaching my waist was incredibly annoying, but inside, I’m a man. If I came to a PC bang, I have to play a game of League. I’m the best backdoor king. A solo player who toys with the enemy with lightning-fast backdoors on both sides of the map.

Life is lived alone, and games are played alone. League is a 1v9 game. If I don’t carry, we lose. While everyone is distracted fighting the enemy, I’ll swiftly slaughter their undefended base. I’ll be the unsung hero.

Of course, I don’t play normal games, which lack any excitement, unless I’m duoing with people from the gallery. My ranked game philosophy is simple and clear. Frankly, anyone below Gold isn’t human. Above Gold are no-life League addicts. The highest tier a talentless League addict can achieve by playing like crazy is Platinum. So, I’m a light user.

The fact that pure gold has a higher domestic trading price than platinum proves that Gold is a superior tier to Platinum. Gold also functions as a general international currency. It’s a metal whose value is recognized worldwide.

Today, I am the jungle. No, I am the Rift itself. The queue popped. Fifth pick. Actually, pick order is meaningless. All humans are equal. Liberty! Equality! It’s like the noble ideals of the French Revolution. The ban/pick phase ended, and seeing Yasuo locked in, I typed in chat, as if making a declaration.

_____

TodayImBackdoorKing: Going jungle 5th pick. Uh… Yasuo is locked in? Should I go another lane?

JungleGiveMeCarry: Ah fck give me jungle don’t play Yasuo you fcking b@stard

eeqrMoneyToSoryu: I’ll give you jungle so do your best lol

_____

Fortunately, the others wanted to play bot lane. Luckily, the positions all matched, resulting in an ideal structure: 1st pick top, 2nd pick mid, 3rd pick ADC, 4th pick support. Our team comp was top Vayne, jungle Master Yi (me), mid Yasuo, ADC Jhin, and support Braum. The enemy team was top Fiora, jungle Nidalee, mid Viktor, ADC Corki, and support Alistar. I guess I have no choice but to carry this game. The fate of this game rests on this mouse.

Twenty minutes passed. The score was 2-19. We were the 2, of course.

______

eeqrMoneyToSoryu (Yasuo 1/4/1): Ah jungle diff is insane dude just quit the game please;;

TodayImBackdoorKing (Master Yi 0/5/0): its fine ill carry just 4v5 i’m stacking predator

eeqrMoneyToSoryu (Yasuo 1/4/1): You fcking kidding me you fcking master yi trash go play MapleStory if you want to play an RPG

JungleGiveMeCarry (Vayne 0/4/0): Ah this game is ruined because of jungle Rengar is camping top all game what is Master Yi even doing?

_______

“Ah, those b@stards are duoing, the flaming is insane.”

I started to get intimidated by the sharp gazes of the middle schoolers watching from behind. I heard them whispering, “Hey, she’s super cute, but she’s a Master Yi main.” Those little brats.

People can have bad games. Who hasn’t int fed in League? Naturally, the surrender vote began, and three yes votes filled up instantly. Of course, I didn’t vote yes. You never know until you fight to the end. No matter how unfavorable the battlefield, with courage and passion! With unwavering faith in your comrades! You can win.

____

YuigahamaPinkYu (Braum 0/2/2): Let’s do our best until the end;; We can win

____

It seemed like Braum voted no. Ugh, what an otaku. Yukino would have surrendered immediately. Yeah, Yuigahama is cute. I know. Hmm, by the way, is this guy in promos? My sharp intuition picked up on it. The way he was coaxing and comforting Jhin, who was tilted and shooting his ult into the air, gave it away.

[TL Note: Otaku – A person obsessed with anime, manga, or games; often seen as socially awkward.]

Thanks to Braum’s super saves, the game dragged on into the 30-minute mark. The enemy team, drunk on the taste of victory, started throwing. We won a teamfight thanks to a Yasuo and Braum ultimate combo. The kill score was 15-27. We had caught up significantly. Vayne and Yasuo had insane carry potential, and once they gained momentum, they scaled incredibly fast.

Just as I was starting to relax, Vayne and Jhin, who were pushing bot lane together, either lacking any concept of lane assignments and macro, or obsessed with CS, died. Somehow, they lost a 2v1 against Fiora. Fiora teleported top, and the remaining four enemy members came running towards me, surrounding me from the opposite side of Fiora.

I was split-pushing deep in the top lane, with nowhere to escape. And now, it was my time. The music playing through my headset spurred me on.

“Once more, give me the courage of a gale.”

I quickly teleported to the pushed-in bot lane. I dramatically escaped the enemy’s perfect encirclement. Only the inhibitor tower remained in the enemy bot lane. I activated my ultimate and Youmuu’s Ghostblade and just ran, faster than anyone. Crack, Crack crack, the sound of the tower crumbling rang out cheerfully. The enemy team was attempting Baron, and Braum and Yasuo were using their ultimates to disrupt it. Seeing that, I ran as always. I was like a Hero – a hero.

Braum and Yasuo died, but after destroying the enemy inhibitor, I leisurely escaped the enemy base. Too bad. If this were my usual body, my usual hands, I could have carried this game long ago. Just then, beep beep– the sound of Corki’s Special Delivery echoed. F*ck. Calm down. As I thought that, Corki flew at me with his knockback, and soon, he and I began a duel to the death.

Oh, my fingers are awkward, I messed up.

BusanBestElementaryKid (Jhin 3/9/8): Ah Master Yi what are you doing losing to Corki lol I saw you hitting minions you f*cking gay got burned by Special Delivery huh following Roh Moo-hyun huh?

[TL Note: Roh Moo-hyun was the 9th President of South Korea who died by suicide in 2009 by jumping off a cliff. The phrase “following Roh Moo-hyun” is a very dark and offensive way of implying someone is going to die or throw themselves off a cliff, often used in toxic gaming slang in Korea.]

And three seconds later, Jhin, who hadn’t been looking at the map because he was typing, died. And I felt a sudden chill.

YuigahamaPinkYu (Braum 1/4/13): Jhin you fcking piece of sht motherfcker you ilbe trash go kill yourself you fcking cnt I can’t fcking play this game fcking surrender.

[TL Note: ilbe trash = refers to users of Ilbe (Ilgan Best), a notorious far-right online community in South Korea known for toxic, sexist, and anti-democratic views. Calling someone “Ilbe trash” is like calling them a scumbag with disgusting political and social opinions.]

BusanBestElementaryKid (Jhin 3/9/8): Otaku got triggered lol Gwangju? It’s a riot! Yuigahama stop being a pink princess! Hai Yuru Yuri Hajimaruyoo~! Yuru Yuri San Hai!

[TL Note:

• “Otaku got triggered”: Making fun of someone for being overly emotional or defensive about anime/nerd culture.

• “Gwangju? It’s a riot!”: A dark joke referencing the Gwangju Uprising, a real 1980 pro-democracy protest in South Korea. Highly insensitive in tone.

• “Yuru Yuri Hajimaruyoo~! Yuru Yuri San Hai!”: Cheerful catchphrases from the anime Yuru Yuri, mimicking how characters start the show.]

YuigahamaPinkYu (Braum 1/4/13): That motherfcker is seriously mentally ill huh I wish all ilbe trash were dead really ha

JungleGiveMeCarry (Vayne 5/8/5): Just f*cking surrender you trashㅡㅡYasuo going to backdoor I’m done bye.

…Oh dear, the otaku messed up. It’s all because those guys are trashy otaku. I love you so much, Umi-chan!