Chapter 6: The Weight of a Guardian

Ding-dong—

The sudden ring of the doorbell startled Jaeseong, who had been sleeping with his head in my lap, causing him to jolt upright.

“Shh, it’s alright,” I reassured him, rising immediately to activate the intercom. As expected, Aunt was waving from the screen, looking exactly as she had yesterday. Pressing the large button, I heard the immediate click of the door unlocking. Today, too, Aunt’s hands were laden with various items. Contrary to my wish to keep the amount of luggage to a minimum, the things she placed on the floor were, without exception, unwelcome.

“Have you had breakfast? What were you two doing— Oh my, you were sleeping, weren’t you, my Jaeseong?”

Aunt embraced Jaeseong, who was still seated on the sofa. The boy, not quite awake, wore a slightly dazed expression before a gentle smile bloomed on his face.

“…Hello.”

“Yes, yes. Did you sleep well? Junseo didn’t bother you, did he?”

“Yes.”

“That’s good. Now, go get dressed. We’re going shopping right away.”

“Yes.”

Jaeseong was undeniably less expressive than other children. While most kids struggled to conceal their joy or sorrow, he possessed an uncanny knack for masking his true feelings. Just now, despite his face remaining impassive at Aunt’s suggestion of going shopping, his heart was brimming with delight.

‘When would he finally reveal everything to me?’

As Jaeseong headed into the room, I too prepared to change, but Aunt suddenly stopped me.

“What is it?”

“You and I need to talk for a moment.”

“What is it this time? If it’s about his education, we’ve already covered everything.”

By now, Aunt’s ‘talk’ was all too predictable. As I frowned, attempting to dismiss her, she insisted it wasn’t that, grabbing my arm once more.

“It’s not about his education, just a moment.”

“Then what is it?”

“Jaeseong, when are you going to show him?”

‘Oh, not this again.’

“Later.”

“How much later?”

“When he’s a bit older.”

“So, when exactly is that?”

‘She’s so persistent, honestly.’ I casually uttered words that were neither a lie nor a joke.

“He’s still only ten, Aunt.”

“…Right. That’s true. Yes, I know. But… as you know, your parents have waited a long time.”

My father and mother trusted me implicitly. Of course, I knew they had both waited for eleven years.

[A ticking time bomb, ready to explode at any moment.]

It was a label that had clung to me ever since I became a Sentinel without a Guide.

Even when I heard such things, my parents never once betrayed any anxiety to me. They had always fully supported my decisions and choices since childhood, and they didn’t try to stop me even when I insisted on bringing home a ten-year-old child, an act completely out of character for me.

Knowing my personality, they deliberately refrained from bringing it up first, but I knew they were, in fact, incredibly curious. However, now was not the time. Jaeseong, above all, needed time to adjust.

“There’s no special meaning behind it. It’s just that you’re now his guardian, and no matter what kind of relationship it is, you’ll eventually become his Guide, so I think your parents will be worried.”

“You’ve already seen him on their behalf, Aunt.”

“I’m me, and they’re different, aren’t they?”

“Then you explain it well, Aunt. You’re family too. If you explain it properly, they’ll probably be fine.”

“But they’ll still be curious…”

“Let’s talk about that later for now. I’m going to go change.”

I deliberately hurried into the room. The regret that immediately washed over me was impossible to ignore. My mind swirled with confusion: Why, and for what purpose, had I brought this child home—a child I couldn’t even show to my parents, let alone anyone else?

The question that had plagued me since our first meeting remained unanswered to this day.

****

The department store on a weekend was infuriatingly crowded. I typically avoided bustling places, and after three months of hardly venturing outside, the throng within the department store felt utterly unfamiliar.

‘Perhaps I should have just stayed home as I was told.’

Despite Aunt’s continuous protests, I had stubbornly insisted on driving, fabricating an excuse, and now found myself in a place I would never normally visit. What’s more, for hours I had been circling children’s clothing stores, both hands laden with shopping bags.

“Look over there.”

“Whoa. Amazing.”

“Is that a model? Or a celebrity?”

‘It would be better if they simply mistook me for a model or a celebrity.’

“For someone like that, their image feels a bit different though.”

“Is that so… Huh? Could they be an Esper?”

“Oh, come on, no way. Would an Esper really just wander around a place this crowded?”

“True. That’s a good point.”

The children’s clothing section, usually the least crowded, was swarming with people. And it was all because of me.

The noisy chatter echoed from every direction. Uncomfortable stares followed me with every step. As if those weren’t enough to fray my nerves, some people openly pointed fingers at me. Honestly, even that was a mild reaction. Occasionally, people would snap photos without asking, forcing me to walk with my head down.

“Are you alright?”

“Do I look alright?”

“See? I told you to just go home.”

‘If I were going to do that, I wouldn’t have come in the first place.’

“Don’t push yourself; just go. We can take a taxi home.”

“It’s fine. Where to next?”

“If we just take the bags we have so far, we can stay here and—”

“I said, where to next?”

With a displeased expression, I took the shopping bags that had just been paid for. Seeing my deeply furrowed brow, Aunt shook her head from side to side.

“Oh, honestly, your stubbornness.”

In truth, I desperately wanted to go home at that very moment, but a single reason held me back.

“Aren’t you tired, Jaeseong?”

“No, I’m fine.”

“Oh, you’re such a good boy. So adorable.”

Jaeseong must have tried on dozens of outfits under Aunt’s enthusiastic insistence, yet he appeared far more energetic than me, despite my good stamina. Even after more than two hours of walking around, he still seemed delighted. Every time he held Aunt’s hand and walked, his joy reached me. That small joy felt almost like my own happiness.

“I think we’ve bought enough clothes, so we’re done here. Now, let’s go to the stationery store.”

“I think we should eat first.”

“Ah, that’s right! It’s already two o’clock. I didn’t even notice the time passing.”

Before heading to a nearby stationery store, we stopped at the department store’s food court. Despite being past lunchtime, the seats were packed. Amidst the bustling crowd, we finally managed to secure a six-person table.

‘I’m never coming to a place like this again.’

“What do you want to eat?”

“I’ll go get the food; you stay here with him, Aunt.”

“Alright? Then I’ll have the curry rice. Jaeseong, what do you want to eat?”

Jaeseong wore a troubled expression. He seemed to ponder for a long time, and after much deliberation, the words that finally emerged from his mouth were, “Anything.”

I ordered Aunt’s curry rice at the Japanese food corner, then looked around and stopped at another stall. It was for the food I had seen on hundreds of pages all morning. After ordering there, I turned to leave, only to find my steps halting again at another spot. It was food from yet another page. In the end, I ordered various dishes from three or four different places before returning to our table.

Aunt clicked her tongue each time I brought back a tray laden with children’s meals—hamburgers, shrimp fried rice, omurice, and more.

“Why?”

“Oh, it’s just that… you’re doing things you never used to do.”

“What is?”

“In my next life, I want to be born a Guide too.”

“I told you it’s not like that.”

“Alright, alright, I get it. We’ll say it’s that.”

Aunt nodded with an indifferent expression, then looked at Jaeseong with a pleased face.

“Jaeseong, your eyelids are uneven.”

At Aunt’s words, Jaeseong smiled shyly.

“How interesting. One is an outer double eyelid, and the other is an inner one. Junseo, you look too.”

I gazed intently at Jaeseong’s face. He met my eyes but then, flustered, quickly averted his gaze.

Jaeseong’s face was quite pale, having seen little sunlight during several months of hospital life. Though he was very thin, his baby fat-kissed cheeks were not unpleasant to look at. His prominent, dark double eyelids, as striking as his large eyes, his small, round nose, and his plump cheeks were like cotton candy.

“They say if you only have one double eyelid, you’re a playboy. But if one is an inner double eyelid, does that still count? I should look it up.”

Aunt tapped on her phone screen, then muttered, ‘Seems like inner double eyelids don’t count. Our Jaeseong is going to break many hearts.’

“What will he do with such a scary guardian?”

“Stop with the useless talk and eat.”

“Oh my, I’m so scared I can’t say anything.”

Guardian. Even though it accurately described the relationship between Jaeseong and me, it felt awkward and uncomfortable. Was I truly meant to be this child’s guardian? I knew it was a decided matter that couldn’t be undone, yet belated regret washed over me.

I knew Jaeseong was the right Guide for me, but the possibility that there might be another Esper better suited for him was quite real. I had only Jaeseong, but he didn’t have only me. However, I hadn’t brought him here simply to bind him to me for that reason alone.

‘Then why, exactly?’

‘What was I thinking, bringing such a young child here? Why did I force myself into this troublesome situation? What exactly do I want to do with you?’

“Um… I’ll eat well.”

“Hmm.”

“Yes, our Jaeseong, eat a lot. But what about you, Junseo?”

“What about me?”

Aunt looked around at the various plates, then at my empty spot, her expression puzzled.

“Didn’t you order anything for yourself?”

“No.”

“Why?”

I silently pointed to the tray in front of Jaeseong. Steam was rising from the various dishes I had ordered.

“……?”

“I’m going to eat that.”

“Isn’t that Jaeseong’s food?”

“…Leftovers.”

“Hmph.”

Aunt was speechless, as if dumbfounded, then after a long moment, she mumbled to herself, ‘He never eats anything someone else has touched. In my next life, I’m definitely going to be born a Guide.’