Chapter 7 : Sweet Innocent Girl

This girl.
She really stayed by my side until I woke up.

That was my first thought upon opening my eyes.

The sky outside the window was darkening.

The sunset still cast a reddish glow, but soon, night would fall.

“Tanya.”

Lucia, noticing I was awake, looked down at me with her usual smile.

Despite finding her smile beautiful,
I was overwhelmed by an indescribable feeling.

Lucia was still holding my hand, hours after I’d fallen asleep.

She must not have let go once.

The realization made
My hand burn where it touched hers.

I blurted out a question.

“Why…”

Wasn’t she bored? Did she have a reason to do this for me?

My mind was still foggy with sleep, but my intention was clear.

It was a question of why she waited for so long.

“Because I like Tanya.”

But Lucia seemed to have misunderstood my question. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have talked about liking someone.

The atmosphere felt strange.

The silence was suffocating, so
I blurted out something, anything.

“Nadia… the teacher…”
“She was here earlier, but she left for the day.”

She should have woken me.
Why would she leave a student in the infirmary until evening?

I cursed the damned doctor inwardly.

Meanwhile, Lucia remained silent, simply staring at me.

No urging me to get up, no saying she’d leave now that I was awake.

As if willing to accommodate whatever I did.

“…”

I was curious.

Why was she so kind to me?

Lucia and I had nothing in common.

Except for her occasional, friendly overtures.

Simply because she was kind? Worried? Concerned?

None of the possibilities felt satisfactory.

More than the origin of her kindness,
I was curious about its limits.

So, I decided to test it.

“Ahh!”

I suddenly pulled on her hand,
Dragging Lucia onto the bed.

She landed on top of me, startled, her pink eyes meeting my emotionless gaze.

Despite my expressionless face,
I was enjoying this immensely.

I quickly pushed myself up,
Pinning her beneath me.

Annoyed by her struggles, I pinned her wrists down.

“T-Tanya…?”

Trapped beneath me,
Lucia, clearly flustered, called my name.

You asked for this.

I was sensitive to affection and attention, easily
Mistaking kindness for something more.

I smiled.

My smile must have seemed sinister, because
Lucia stared at my face, dumbfounded.

“Mm…”

As if to snap her out of it,
I tightened my grip on her wrists.

Hearing her whimper was more enjoyable than I’d anticipated.

Should I just do it?

As I’d said before, I wasn’t attracted to women. Especially not to Lucia herself.

But wasn’t it human nature to desire beauty?

Her light pink hair, spread across the bed, was captivating.

Her skin was soft and warm,
And her ample breasts, pressing against me, kept drawing my gaze.

She was beautiful.

Even her flustered expression was cute and endearing.

Just being this close to her sent shivers down my spine. I felt an overwhelming urge to take it further.

If this simple contact felt so good,
How would it feel to caress her, to feel the warmth of her skin against mine?

Lucia didn’t resist.
Whether she was simply too stunned or didn’t mind, she showed no signs of refusal.

Not even when I started unbuttoning her shirt and loosening her tie.

I found it strange.
It was odd for her to be so passive.

I’d expected her to scold me, given her strong personality.

I had to ask.

“Why aren’t you resisting?”

After a moment of thought, Lucia replied
With a somewhat baffling statement.

“Anything is fine, as long as it’s with Tanya.”

And just like that,
Her words angered me. Was it because I was a twisted, terrible person?

What? Anything is fine?

Did she even realize the situation she was in?
What she was saying?

To utter such words while on the verge of being defiled by a piece of trash like me was quite a feat.

Did she think this was a game?

If so, I was more than happy to show her what reality was like.

I unbuttoned her shirt faster.

My intention was clear, my mind made up.
All that remained was…

If Lucia hadn’t spoken at that moment, I would have crossed the line.

“But Tanya,”
“Be quiet…”
“Why are you taking my clothes off?”

She tilted her head, her question filled with innocent curiosity.

…

I froze.

I’d forgotten something.

Just how endlessly naive she was.

For someone who might not even understand the dynamics between men and women,
It was no wonder she couldn’t comprehend my actions, especially since I, at least outwardly, was a woman too.

So,
Her saying “anything is fine” was simply an innocent consent born out of ignorance.

“…”

I felt disgusted with myself.

A wave of guilt washed over me.

Even a lightning strike wouldn’t have felt this jarring.

What was I trying to do to someone who cared so much about me?

This wasn’t like me.

“…”
“Why are you so still?”
“Well…”
“Are you sleepy? Want to sleep more?”

Don’t treat me like a baby. But I didn’t have the energy to say it.

The shock had drained my strength, and
I collapsed beside Lucia, lying next to her.

The bed was a single.
Too small for two.

Lucia, glancing at me, got up.

And then, she climbed on top of me.

“Huh?”
“What?”
“No, why…”
“You did it too.”
“That’s…”

That was different.

I was speechless.

The situation had reversed in an instant.

Lucia, sitting on my thighs,
Her innocent eyes meeting mine, giggled.

She pinned my wrists down, preventing me from pushing her off.

Exactly what I’d done to her moments ago.

“Wait, Miss Lucia…”
“Shhh…”
“…”

Lucia started unbuttoning my shirt.

The top buttons came undone, revealing the swell of my breasts, comically large on my emaciated frame.

I realized she was imitating me.

Her eyes held pure curiosity.

She wasn’t trying to tease me,
Nor was she driven by lust.
She was simply mimicking my actions, like an innocent child copying what she saw.

“Wait, stop. Don’t…”
“Why?”
“No. Absolutely not.”

If, and only if,
Lucia truly desired me,
If she found me interesting, body or mind,
And wanted to be with me, I wouldn’t hesitate to sleep with her.

But not like this. Not out of mere curiosity.
Not with a “you did it, so I’ll do it too” mentality. I couldn’t bring myself to take advantage of her innocence.

Oblivious to my inner turmoil,
Lucia easily unbuttoned the rest of my shirt.

Her warm hand reached behind me, attempting to unclasp my bra.

If this continued, I’d really, truly cross the line.

I had to plead with her.

“No… please…”

I couldn’t meet her eyes.

I whimpered like a hunted animal.

Lying beneath her, my head turned away, begging her to stop in a small voice, I must have looked pathetic.

Thankfully,
Lucia stopped.

“…”
“…”

I trembled.

Was it the aftereffects of the drug? Or the shock of Lucia’s actions?

Either way, it wasn’t pleasant.

“Want a hug?”
“No.”
“Too bad.”

Too bad for whom?

After my vehement refusal,
She obediently climbed off me.

And then, she said something utterly nonsensical.

“Why are you so pretty, Tanya?”
“Huh?”
“You’re pretty even when you’re about to cry. You surprised me…”

When was I about to cry?

But I had no right to say that. Because right then,
A tear rolled down my cheek.