Chapter 7: Ten Minutes With a Lunatic

Episode 7

What on earth was happening to him today?
Kyungheon stared at the hunter sitting obediently in the chair in front of MachoKing and took a moment to breathe.

“Is it because he’s not a person but a dog that he doesn’t understand human speech?”

A bastard dog, huh.
But every dog Kyungheon had ever met had been better than most people, so that thought flew out the window fast.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Don’t people tell you you’re crazy?
[Whisper] Seohyun: I’m just gonna do it for a bit and then ditch anyway
[Whisper] MachoKing: Why me
[Whisper] Seohyun: Word’s all over the boards that you’re funny, Macho

Facing Seohyun, Kyungheon unconsciously pressed at his temples.
Was this the kind of lunatic Jongwoon had warned him about?
“If you’re not joining a guild or making a party, don’t get close to other users.”
He remembered his junior’s warning and let out a sigh filled with irritation.

That quiver he’d just gotten was +16, right.
He lifted his hands from his knees and began typing again.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Ten minutes.
[Whisper] MachoKing: I’ll do it—think of it as paying for the quiver.

Kyungheon unlocked his phone and opened the Korean dictionary. Then calmly spoke:

[Whisper] MachoKing: Ggui… ddong what?
[Whisper] MachoKing: Start over from there.

**

[Whisper] MachoKing: Artemisia annua. (“dog-feces wormwood”)
[Whisper] Seohyun: Ah.
[Whisper] MachoKing: One.
[Whisper] Seohyun: ssm (sorry my bad)
[Whisper] MachoKing: Two.
[Whisper] Seohyun: Ssuk-daemori (“wormwood-head,” a song)
[Whisper] MachoKing: I said no four-syllable words. That was the rule.
[Whisper] Seohyun: Just this once please
[Whisper] MachoKing: No. You’re out.
[Whisper] Seohyun: Hyung, please…

The sudden “hyung” sent chills down Kyungheon’s spine.

[Whisper] MachoKing: What—
[Whisper] MachoKing: Why are you calling me hyung when you don’t even know my age?

He bit his lip.
What gave this punk the right to call him that?
And yet the answer that came back was full of certainty:

[Whisper] Seohyun: Your nickname says it all lol
[Whisper] MachoKing: What?
[Whisper] Seohyun: Honestly hyung, your nickname is lame as hell

Not stopping at insulting the name “MachoKing,” the kid continued:

[Whisper] Seohyun: If you’re bad at naming, at least throw in some random English
[Whisper] Seohyun: Or there’s plenty of cool native-Korean words

[Whisper] MachoKing: Stop it
[Whisper] Seohyun: “Doom Bowmaster”
[Whisper] Seohyun: “Untact Croffle Waffle”
[Whisper] MachoKing: The hell, does the waffle social-distance now?
[Whisper] Seohyun: “Smiley Smiley Tiger of Sword Preservation”
[Whisper] MachoKing: Stop it, why is the tiger smiling, you bastard

[Whisper] MachoKing: I’ve been doing this shitty word-chain game for ten minutes—

All the names were worse than “MachoKing.”
Unable to hide his displeasure, Kyungheon fumed while Seohyun kept going—
now picking apart the origins of the name.

[Whisper] Seohyun: Hmm >>>> MachoKing <<<<
[Whisper] Seohyun: Sounds like a card game after-schoolers play
[Whisper] MachoKing: What is this, Yu-Gi-Oh
[Whisper] Seohyun: Feels like those stickers you get from buying bread
[Whisper] Seohyun: But not the rare ones

For the first time, Kyungheon regretted borrowing Jongwoon’s account.

If it were his own, he could just log out and never look back.
But if he quit now, this bastard might chase him every time he logged in.
He could bail, sure—but this account wasn’t his.

Lowering his stiff back into the chair, Kyungheon took a deep breath and looked up at the blank hospital ceiling.
Then he looked back down at the screen, at the lunatic tormenting him.

“…Why am I catering to this idiot?”

He should’ve stayed in the mines until he rotted.
Annoyance he’d been suppressing began to rise.

His fingers moved before he could stop them.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Hey.
[Whisper] Seohyun: ???
[Whisper] MachoKing: I played along. That’s enough.
[Whisper] MachoKing: Why isn’t ‘hogoo’ (pushover) censored as a swear?
[Whisper] MachoKing: What kind of game is this ♡♡

Even the swear filter was mocking him; it censored everything except the word he wanted censored. Remembering he’d never had normal blood pressure since starting this game, Kyungheon began verbally destroying Seohyun.

[Whisper] MachoKing: You enjoy bullying easy newbies?

And before starting again, he remembered how smugly Seohyun had called himself max level.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Max level my ass
[Whisper] MachoKing: Max level with that personality, my ass

[Whisper] Seohyun: Hyung, you mad? LOLOLOL
[Whisper] Seohyun: Want me to lose on purpose? You’re getting wrecked at word chain lmao

Kyungheon ground his teeth and typed:

[Whisper] MachoKing: Wow thanks, you ♡♡
[Whisper] MachoKing: That really helps, you ♡♡♡♡
[Whisper] MachoKing: People like you are why Odin gets called a trash game

[Whisper] Seohyun: I hear that a lot
[Whisper] Seohyun: So it doesn’t hurt much

As expected.

Hearing Seohyun state his reputation so casually made Kyungheon sigh deeply.
How did this kind of pest exist in society?
No—this was the game’s fault. Instead of sluggish updates, they should build police stations and prisons on the map.

And this lunatic should be first to get locked up.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Hey you ♡♡♡♡
[Whisper] MachoKing: Why’d you put your arm around me earlier

[Whisper] Seohyun: LOLOLOL

[Whisper] MachoKing: Then what was that picture? Huh? ♡♡

The only sound in the quiet hospital room was his frantic typing.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Why’d you take a nice friendly picture with me

His irritation showed in his typos.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Was that my memorial photo or what?
[Whisper] MachoKing: You’re worse than a dog
[Whisper] MachoKing: I’m too old to be playing word chain

[Whisper] Seohyun: lololol you’re REALLY mad

But Seohyun stayed relaxed—almost enjoying Kyungheon’s rage.
His replies carried subtle expectation, a different flavor of crazy from before.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Time’s up
[Whisper] MachoKing: Keep your promise. I’m leaving

[Whisper] Seohyun: I love manliness so much
[Whisper] Seohyun: What if I’m a girl tho?

“A girl, my ass. You bastard. I’ll go find you and rip your d*ck off.”

[Whisper] Seohyun: Hyung, do you like when someone calls you oppa?
[Whisper] MachoKing: If you don’t want me to leave, stop talking.
[Whisper] Seohyun: aa ah ah oppa aa~

[Whisper] MachoKing: You doing a mic test?
[Whisper] Seohyun: Okay, ready.

Obviously a guy, yet saying “oppa” like that—disgustingly playful—made Kyungheon’s face twist.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Whatever, take your meds if you’re sick
[Whisper] Seohyun: How old are you, oppa?
[Whisper] MachoKing: I’m leaving, bye.

He moved to hit Settings and log out—
but then new messages popped up, revealing personal info.

[Whisper] Seohyun: I’m twenty-four
[Whisper] Seohyun: And yeah, I’m a guy lol
[Whisper] Seohyun: What about you? lolol

His fingers froze.
If he didn’t answer, this pest would keep digging.
Even if he left the server, the moment he logged in again, Seohyun would find him via friend search.

Might as well tell him once and get it over with.

Twenty-four—five years younger than his real age, twenty-nine.
So telling the truth would be fine… right?

Kyungheon hesitated, then typed slowly.

[Whisper] MachoKing: I’m a bit older.
[Whisper] Seohyun: ?? lol what
[Whisper] Seohyun: It’s fine, just say it

He typed “29”
…paused…
and then deleted it.

Maybe giving a higher number would calm things down.
At least then this brat would show some respect.

[Whisper] MachoKing: Thirty-four.
[Whisper] MachoKing: I’m exactly ten years older.

But the guy was not easy prey.

[Whisper] Seohyun: Stop joking
[Whisper] Seohyun: Seriously hyung, don’t bullshit me

Kyungheon chuckled at Seohyun’s annoyed disbelief.
At first he’d thought this kid was just crazy—but now he felt like he was observing some kind of defective insect.

With the tension eased a little, Kyungheon continued lying with a straight face.

And that’s how one man’s life story began to be rewritten.