Chapter 7: Desire And Doubt

Her face was still exquisitely made up with rouge and powder.

Half of it was hidden beneath the brocade quilt.

Only those moist, glistening eyes were exposed, staring straight at him.

 

Today, when he returned home, bathed, and changed clothes, she had been waiting for him.

When she heard the movement and looked over, she had stared at him in the same unblinking way.

 

So focused that it was as if she had fixed her sights on him.

 

In the past, Madam Pu rarely met his gaze.

She had never looked at him like this before.

 

Yan Chiyun met her eyes and did not move for a moment.

“……”

 

***

 

Outside, Jing Chun waited anxiously.

Not long after the candlelight in the inner chamber was extinguished, intimate sounds quickly drifted out from inside.

 

Wave after wave.

Because the lattice window was opened wider than usual, the sounds carried more clearly than on ordinary nights.

 

The young woman’s soft, delicate sobs.

The man’s low, hoarse voice.

 

Intertwined together, they made one’s face flush and heart race just listening.

 

The duration of their intimacy was still longer than usual.

It was even longer than that night some time ago.

 

The little maids waited outside.

Jing Chun gazed at the moon’s reflection and wondered whether she should truthfully report Madam Pu Jinyu’s recent abnormal behavior to Madam Pu, along with the increasingly long duration of her nights with Yan Chiyun.

 

Was Pu Jinyu doing this solely to conceive an heir, and that was why she was frequently entangling herself with His Lordship?

Or did she have ulterior motives?

 

For a moment, Jing Chun found herself unable to tell.

 

Madam Pu did not permit the Third Miss to seduce Yan Chiyun.

In Madam Pu’s heart, this man belonged to the true Eldest Miss, Pu Wange.

 

Thinking of this, Jing Chun suddenly clenched her hand.

 

The Eldest Miss…

Everyone believed the Eldest Miss was already dead.

In truth, she was not dead at all.

 

Now, the Eldest Miss was still together with her lover.

But if one day she changed her mind and returned…

Once Madam Pu knew the truth that the Eldest Miss was alive, she would certainly abandon the Third Miss and quietly switch the two back.

 

After all, the Third Miss was only living in the Eldest Miss’s place right now.

Everything she had should have belonged to the Eldest Miss in the first place.

She truly should not harbor desires beyond her station.

 

Moreover, Jing Chun had accompanied the Eldest Miss for many years.

The Eldest Miss had treated her very well.

 

Jing Chun quickly made up her mind.

She would report everything, in full detail, to Madam Pu.

 

As for Pu Jinyu…

The Third Miss was pitiful, but as a servant, one could only have one master.

Following the Third Miss truly held no future.

 

Most importantly, the Third Miss had no powerful maternal family to support her.

Although Concubine Ruan now had a place in the Pu household and enjoyed Lord Pu’s favor, all of that was only because Madam Pu needed her to keep the Third Miss in check.

 

Once the Eldest Miss returned and the Third Miss lost her use, Concubine Ruan would certainly be driven out of the Pu household.

She might even end up worse than dead.

 

Beautiful women were rare in this world, but youth faded easily.

Relying on beauty to serve a man—how long could that really last?

 

***

 

Tonight, Madam Pu was even more passionate than that day.

 

The first time was especially intense.

 

Unlike before, when everything had been strictly businesslike, she responded to his touches.

She even began to kiss his chest.

She touched his waist and abdomen, his arms, and used her crimson-painted nails to scrape lightly against the bulging veins on his arm.

 

She clumsily kissed his chest, his collarbones, and his throat.

Sometimes heavy, sometimes light.

It was unbearably teasing.

 

Yan Chiyun rested both hands lightly on her slender waist, feeling her chest draw close to his.

Before long, he could no longer withstand Madam Pu’s provocation.

 

Just as he was about to begin, she did not urge him to get straight to the point as she usually did.

Instead, she followed his arm down to his wrist, took his hand, and guided him elsewhere.

 

In the pitch-dark room where one could not see one’s hand before one’s eyes, he let her lead his hand.

They moved closer to a place he had been intimate with before, though not so often as to be overly familiar.

 

He had long known that Madam Pu was fragile, slender, and easily broken.

 

On their wedding night, she had trembled like a sieve, enduring while shedding tears.

 

Yet when he truly touched her, a fierce sense of disbelief still rose in his heart.

She was far too delicate.

 

So slender that even guiding his hand was difficult for her.

He could not help wondering how she had managed to accommodate him fully.

 

Yan Chiyun could not stop himself from thinking these things.

Pu Jinyu’s movements did not stop.

 

She guided his large hand to explore.

She herself did not fall entirely into a passive position either.

 

Her other hand was not idle.

It found, on its own, the place he never showed to others.

 

They explored one another.

They occupied each other’s secrets.

 

Yan Chiyun did not know where she had learned so many tricks.

From her movements, he could feel her inexperience.

Yet he was also astonished by her boldness beneath that unusual propriety and restraint.

 

The young woman in his arms buried her head against his chest.

Her breath was hot, all of it landing on him.

 

Beyond that, the restraint he had always maintained seemed to waver tonight.

 

On one side, he felt Madam Pu’s palm—bonelessly soft, delicate, wrapping around him.

Because she could not fully contain him, she loosened and tightened her grip intermittently.

 

On the other side, his own hand followed her guidance into territory that was unknown—

No, not entirely unknown.

He had been here before.

 

Though over three years, his visits had not been many.

 

To him, it was not completely unfamiliar.

Even so, it stirred in him the desire to know it in full.

 

Ambiguous breathing rose and fell.

His and hers intertwined together.

 

Even their breaths tangled silently within the bed curtains.

This was the first time in so many years that Yan Chiyun felt such stimulation and torment.

All of it was brought to him by Madam Pu.

 

Yet she simply continued to guide his large hand, lingering and playing, as if she had no intention of going further for the moment.

Yan Chiyun endured along with her.

 

He listened to her soft, delicate breaths.

She still buried her head against his chest, refusing to lift it.

Her long hair spilled down, covering her face.

Did she not feel stifled?

 

Knowing full well that they would be intimate tonight, and that rouge and powder would be ruined by sweat and tears, turning into a mess, she still liked to apply makeup before sleeping.

Yan Chiyun had no choice but to distract himself and restrain the stirring in his heart.

 

Pu Jinyu felt somewhat tired.

Yan Chiyun wielded a sword year-round.

From a distance, his hands looked well-defined, long, and fair—very pleasing to the eye.

Only after experiencing them firsthand did she realize how many calluses his fingertips had, to the point that she felt discomfort.

 

She bit her lip and endured.

 

But precisely because she was enduring, she unconsciously increased the force of her grip.

She completely forgot what her other hand was doing.

 

The sudden force made the man hiss sharply as he sucked in a breath of cold air.

Pu Jinyu froze in fright.

She released her grip and even lifted her head to look at him.

 

Yan Chiyun took a moment to recover.

He lowered his head and looked at her exposed forehead, those watery eyes, and her long black hair lying across her high nose bridge, messily covering half her face.

 

Yan Chiyun looked at her.

“……”

Although the young woman’s carefully made-up face was indeed smeared by sweat and tears, just as he had expected, and even stuck to his body, he did not find her dirty or ugly.

Instead, he wanted to wipe her clean.

He wanted to see what she looked like without powder, her original appearance.

 

But fearing her resistance, he merely thought it.

He did not act.

 

Pu Jinyu paused for a long while.

Not wanting all her efforts to be wasted, she tilted her head up and gently kissed the man’s jaw in appeasement.

 

Yan Chiyun did indeed feel her clumsy attempt at comfort.

 

Her kisses were light and intermittent.

Rather than kissing, it was more like pecking.

Because she did not want to let go, and because of the height difference between them, she had to cling to him with great effort.

Unintentionally, this caused ambiguous rubbing and contact.

 

The fire already burning in his chest was stoked further by these sparks, growing hotter and hotter.

He found it extremely difficult to restrain himself.

 

Madam Pu was the wife he had married with proper rites.

They had been married for over three years.

There was no need to restrain themselves in matters of the bed.

 

So he lifted her slender waist, seized the initiative, turned over, pinched the back of her neck, and kissed her lips.

 

The first thing he tasted was the lip rouge she had applied.

As the rouge melted, he tasted its flavor.

 

After the previous time, when he went to bathe and lit the candles, he had discovered that every place she had kissed on his body was marked with lip prints.

 

Tonight, this time, the places she kissed would likely not be spared either.

 

In truth, he did not particularly like the scent of rouge and powder.

When he tasted the lip rouge on her lips, he instinctively wanted to pull away.

But then he felt that doing so would not be very appropriate.

 

After all, they had only just begun.

 

So Yan Chiyun did not linger long on her lips.

To avoid tasting too much of that rouge, he pried open the young woman’s lips and kissed deeply.

 

The moment their tongues touched, it was not only Yan Chiyun who paused.

Pu Jinyu froze as well.

 

Though they had been married for many years and shared the bed every month, they had basically never kissed.

Such intimate kissing was even more unheard of.

For both of them, this exceeded expectations.

 

But Pu Jinyu reacted quickly.

She had intended to seduce, to disrupt, to toy with this lofty head of the Yan household who, in her legal mother’s words, did not belong to her.

 

Thus, from shallow responses, she gradually applied more force, clumsily turning the tables.

Her tongue darted playfully into the man’s thin lips, sweeping around once before timidly retreating.

Yan Chiyun’s gaze darkened.

 

His large hand held the back of her head as he kissed her.

 

Although Madam Pu’s lips were full of rouge, everything within her mouth was incomparably soft and fragrant.

Not only did he not resist it, he even felt a strange fondness for it.

 

So he followed his heart and continued kissing her, continuing their intimacy.

“……”

This night was truly tumultuous.

It was not until deep into the night that they finally stopped.

 

Though the number of times they coupled was fewer than on previous nights, each time lasted a long while.

 

Yan Chiyun took a long time to steady his breathing.

The lingering numb pleasure after that ease and release did not dissipate for a long time.

He even wanted to continue.

 

This was different from last time.

Last time, it had been to satisfy Madam Pu’s desire to continue.

This time, something had truly changed.

 

If he said he wanted to continue, she likely would not refuse.

But hearing her rapid, delicate breathing, he knew she was exhausted.

 

She lay limp on top of him, just like last time.

She hugged him and buried her face in the side of his neck, lying there as she recovered.

 

After a long while, her breathing gradually steadied.

Yet she did not move at all, as if she had forgotten about bathing and washing up.

 

He knew she was tired.

But this tired?

 

Yan Chiyun listened to her breathing shift from steady to light and soft.

If it grew any longer and more even, she would fall asleep outright.

 

He lowered his gaze and spoke.

“You should bathe before sleeping.”

 

Both of them were sticky all over.

The bed was dirty as well.

If they slept like this, it would be uncomfortable.

 

Pu Jinyu felt utterly exhausted.

Her entire body lacked strength.

She had already expended a great deal of energy today managing matters inside and outside the Yan household.

 

She had not expected Yan Chiyun to be so unable to withstand provocation.

His usual restraint had loosened, and she could not hold up against it.

 

At this moment, upon hearing him speak, she did not want to move at all.

 

If he wanted to bathe, he could go first.

Once he got up, lit the lamps, and left, Jing Chun would certainly come in to support her.

 

But she did not expect Yan Chiyun to actually pick her up.

Pu Jinyu’s eyelashes trembled slightly.

 

Feeling her head shift, Yan Chiyun lowered his eyes to look at her.

He thought she might speak to resist.

Unexpectedly, she only moved without saying anything.

 

Since she did not resist, he decided to carry her to the bathhouse.

 

After lighting the lamps and sending someone to fetch hot water, the maid attending her closely rushed up anxiously.

“Milord, it would be better for this servant to help the Miss bathe.”

 

Heaven knew what Jing Chun felt when she saw Yan Chiyun carrying Pu Jinyu and striding toward the bathhouse.

Her soul nearly flew out of her body.

She no longer cared about anything else and hurried forward to stop him.

 

Pu Jinyu must have heard her words, yet she did not move at all.

She let Yan Chiyun carry her, wrapping her arms around him, burying her face, not speaking, not getting down.

 

“Miss… Miss… let this servant attend you in bathing, shall I?”

Jing Chun was frantic inside, yet forced herself to maintain calm on her face.

 

She was almost about to reach out and shake Pu Jinyu, forcing some reaction out of her.

But with Yan Chiyun present, she did not dare.

 

Pu Jinyu still did not answer.

The maid standing before them was someone she had brought from the Pu household.

It was not appropriate to directly drive her away.

Yet the other party seemed determined to help Pu Jinyu bathe.

 

Yan Chiyun looked down at the head resting in his arms.

“Do you want me, or do you want your maid to help you?” he asked in a low voice.

 

Hearing the faint trace of gentleness in the man’s tone, and sensing the change in him, Jing Chun’s heart jolted.

“……”

Pu Jinyu moved her head slightly.

She still did not speak.

 

But she rubbed against the side of his neck.

It was more like choosing him to help.

 

Yan Chiyun did not waste any more words.

“You may withdraw.”

 

He carried Pu Jinyu into the bathhouse.

 

Yet the maid still refused to leave.

When he placed the person in his arms into the tub, the little maid rushed forward again, blocking the young woman in the tub.

 

“M-Milord, this servant has attended the Miss since childhood and truly cannot rest easy…

Moreover, you are of such noble status.

How could you personally bathe the Miss?”

 

He was Madam Pu’s husband.

They had already done far more intimate things.

Bathing was merely helping her wash.

What was the issue?

 

Having spent many years in the Zhaoyu Prison, Yan Chiyun sensed the maid’s insistence was abnormal.

For a moment, he neither spoke nor left.

 

Jing Chun was truly about to collapse under the man’s cold pressure.

She absolutely could not let His Lordship grow suspicious.

 

Stammering, she explained that she insisted on bathing Pu Jinyu because Pu Jinyu loved beauty.

She only allowed those close to her to bathe her, because afterward she needed to redo her grooming and makeup.

Otherwise, she felt unaccustomed.

 

This was indeed true, but…

He still felt that something was not quite right.

 

“It is late tonight.

Milord, you should also go bathe soon, or the hot water will grow cold.”

 

Madam Pu had already been placed in the tub.

If they continued arguing, the water really would cool.

 

Yan Chiyun glanced back once.

In truth, he saw nothing, because the little maid blocked the view.

 

He withdrew his gaze and walked out.

“……”

After the man left, Jing Chun feared he might return.

She lingered at the bathhouse door for quite some time.

Only after confirming that water sounds came from the other bathhouse did she hurriedly help Pu Jinyu bathe, groom, and apply makeup again.

 

When she parted Pu Jinyu’s long hair and glimpsed the marks on her body, her unusually swollen lips, and… the places that were even more severe than usual, Jing Chun’s heart leapt into her throat.

 

She would definitely have to inform Madam Pu of this matter tomorrow.

Otherwise, the situation would sooner or later spiral out of control.

 

After Matron Wu’s accident, she alone could not steady Pu Jinyu at all.

 

If His Lordship had truly bathed the Third Miss tonight and seen her true appearance beneath all that heavy makeup, then even if the Eldest Miss wished to return, it would be impossible!

 

The Third Miss’s original appearance differed from the Eldest Miss’s.

How could it possibly fool Yan Chiyun, who oversaw the Zhaoyu Prison of the Northern Depot?

 

Jing Chun moved swiftly.

By the time Yan Chiyun came out, she had already finished tidying Pu Jinyu and placed her back into the bedding, arranging her into a proper sleeping posture.

 

Only a single dim candle was left in the room.

When Yan Chiyun entered, he did not extinguish it right away.

He lifted the bed curtains and glanced inside.

 

He saw the meticulously made-up young woman restored to her usual propriety, lying flat and sleeping.

 

After looking for a while, Yan Chiyun extinguished the candle and lay down flat.

 

That night, the person beside him had long since settled into soft, even breathing.

Yet he lay with his eyes closed, unable to fall asleep for a long time.

 

While bathing earlier, he had recalled the obstruction from the Pu household maid.

It was truly suspicious.

 

What was she trying to block?

It was as if she feared he might see Madam Pu’s true appearance.

 

Thinking of this, Yan Chiyun turned slightly and fixed his gaze on the face beside him.

 

Could it be that once the makeup was removed, Madam Pu’s true appearance was very different from how she looked now?

 

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