X
Join our Discord server and get release updates for every novel you follow.
Join the ServerThe Crown Princess who had hanged herself last year had been the Empress’s spy.
Though she sat in the position of Crown Princess, she had poisoned the Crown Prince’s wine and food on several occasions.
Without this strange ability to hear others’ minds, even dozens or hundreds of lives wouldn’t have been enough to save him.
He had pretended not to know, let things slide, but when he reached his limit and confronted her about her crimes, she was found the next day as a hanged corpse.
Everyone whispered again that the Crown Princess had taken her own life—but it was not suicide.
‘Your Majesty the Empress, His Highness the Crown Prince suspects me.
What should I do now?
Please protect me from His Highness.
I only did as Your Majesty commanded, did I not?’
In her desperation, the Crown Princess clung to the Empress.
But the Empress, judging that the Crown Princess might drag her down, had her disposed of.
When the Empress’s inner thoughts revealed the full story, the Crown Prince had simply clicked his tongue and let it pass.
With the Crown Princess dead, there was no physical evidence to bring down the Empress.
There was no way to prove what only he could hear.
Nor was he so fond of the Crown Princess as to expose the truth of her death himself.
He had no reason to show warmth to someone who had sought his life.
“If there is nothing more to say, may I take my leave?”
As he rose and asked, the Emperor waved his hand dismissively.
The Empress smiled and said yes, even adding unnecessary words about how she would console the Crown Princess.
The Crown Princess, her feelings hurt, did not even look at the Crown Prince.
At least to outsiders, the relationship between the Empress and Crown Princess would appear harmonious.
At least on the surface, the inner court would seem peaceful.
Leaving no attachment behind, he rose and exited the main hall.
The palace was no different yesterday or today.
The Emperor, his father, was nothing but a shell, and the Empress beside him was as cunning as ever.
The Crown Princess had changed, but she was as irrelevant as before.
If he were to show any interest in the Crown Princess and appear to have a harmonious marriage, the Empress would immediately try to kill her.
Thus, showing not a shred of interest was the only way for her to survive in the palace with her life intact.
So do not resent me too much.
This too is for your sake.
After the Crown Prince left, the Empress called for the Crown Princess.
Having taken the Empress’s earlier words as sympathy for her feelings, the Crown Princess looked at her with trusting eyes.
“While it may be understandable for the Crown Prince, you must hold your ground, Crown Princess.”
The Empress’s tone grew firm.
“Surely you cannot allow the Crown Prince to be swayed by a mere dancer’s skirts?”
“But what can I possibly do…?”
At the Crown Princess’s pitiful ignorance, the Empress clicked her tongue.
“Since you cannot communicate with the Crown Prince, you must take hold of that dancer.”
“Take hold?” the Crown Princess asked naively.
“As the second highest lady of the inner court, you must meet her directly and discipline her properly so she does not act insolently.”
“How could I…”
“Why must you be so weak!
Are you willing to let the Crown Prince be taken by that dancer?”
The Crown Princess, who had never sought the Crown Prince’s heart in the first place, grimaced with complicated feelings.
“I know you have not opened your heart to the Crown Prince.
But that is a separate matter from establishing proper order.
Unless you wish to be a Crown Princess in name only, you must set things straight.
Act like someone of your station.
Would it not look better to others for the Crown Princess to act personally, rather than for me, the Empress, to meddle in the Crown Prince’s women?”
At the Empress’s words that she could not intervene directly, so the Crown Princess must properly rein in the dancer, the Crown Princess reluctantly nodded.
***
‘Your acting isn’t bad, but… how should I put it, there’s something crucial missing.
Ha Eun-gyo-ssi, how old did you say you were?’
‘I’m twenty-seven.’
‘Your face is completely baby-faced.
You’re not that young, so why does your emotion lack depth?
Have you never been in love?’
He’d failed yet another audition he’d poured his heart into.
How many rejections was this now—he’d already lost count on his fingers.
Though he had started acting later than others, he took on any role given, whether in theater or drama, without discrimination.
But it was always just bit parts.
This time, the role he auditioned for was a supporting character, the lead’s friend.
A role where he falls in love with the same woman as the lead but can’t confess for the sake of his friend, suffering in silence.
He thought he’d done fairly well, but the director said it was lacking.
‘What does “you’ve never been in love” even mean?
That’s bullshit!
If there’s anyone who’s pined for someone as long as I have, let them come out and show me!’
Senior Ha-yoon, who knew it was his audition day, contacted him first.
After asking about the result, he suggested they have a drink.
He didn’t want to be consoled, but he did want to see him.
He agreed, hoping that seeing him might lift his gloomy mood.
But once the alcohol kicked in, all the pent-up emotions came pouring out.
He’d prepared so hard, proud that he was no less than anyone else—so why wasn’t it working?
Why did he have to like the same gender as the person he loved?
And why couldn’t he even confess?
The more he drank, the more his emotions welled up.
It was bad enough just pining away, but hearing that he lacked emotional depth because he’d never been in love hit him hard.
‘You were in love?’
Senior Ha-yoon asked with a smile.
Only then did he realize his slip, but he couldn’t take back what he’d already said.
‘Hang in there.
You’ll be fine.’
He cheered him on without even knowing who his crush was.
When he reached out and patted his head as always, his feelings crossed the limit.
‘I like you.
The person I like is you, Senior.’
What had Senior Ha-yoon’s expression been at that moment?
Perhaps because he was drunk, he couldn’t remember his face clearly.
‘I’m sorry.
I appreciate your feelings, but I don’t think I can give you an answer.’
His heart felt like it stopped at his reply.
If he had completely stiffened, he might have accepted it as inevitable—but his voice was surprisingly calm and steady.
His eyes stung, and it felt like tears would spill.
He hated himself from moments ago and wanted to die.
I shouldn’t have said it.
If I hadn’t, we could have remained good seniors and juniors like now.
‘Ah, I just remembered I had an appointment.
Sorry, Senior.
I’ll contact you later.
I’m sorry.’
Without waiting for his answer, he quickly stood and left the bar.
Only then did the tears pour out.
Ignoring the stares of passersby, he walked and walked, sobbing for a long time, until he found himself on the Han River bridge.
Leaning against the iron railing, gazing down at the black water, only sighs escaped him.
It wasn’t like he’d die just because he failed an audition.
Even if it was bit parts, he’d been steadily working.
Though heartbroken, Senior Ha-yoon would probably meet him again as if nothing had happened.
Even if his heart ached like it would die, the world kept turning the same as yesterday.
Perhaps because he’d cried his fill, he felt somewhat lighter.
He could just audition again.
He couldn’t give up his long-standing crush immediately, but he could slowly let go.
He’d endured worse and stood firm alone.
‘Aaaaahhhhh!’
He shouted at the top of his lungs toward the Han River, expelling the blockage in his chest with the yell.
He slapped both cheeks hard enough to make a sharp sound and lifted his head.
It’s okay, Ha Eun-gyo.
You can live bravely.
After reassuring himself as usual, he turned to go home—and gasped.
Right beside him, an old man was climbing over the railing of the iron bridge.
‘Whoa!
Sir, what are you doing?!’
He tried to grab him, but the drunk old man was too strong.
Shaking Eun-gyo off, he stood on top of the railing and spewed a torrent of curses at the world.
Listening to him, Eun-gyo felt like his own chest was being hollowed out, and he let out a wry laugh.
When the cursing seemed to subside, he tried to persuade him to come down, but he wouldn’t budge.
‘Life’s hard for you too, isn’t it?’
The old man held out his soju bottle toward Eun-gyo.
He said he’d take it if he came down, but the old man shook his head.
He was wobbling so dangerously that Eun-gyo couldn’t just watch.
With no other choice, Eun-gyo also climbed onto the railing, sat the old man down, and sat beside him.
He planned to keep him company until he calmed down, then take him back down.
‘f*ck this dirty world!
Just die and be done with it!’
Just when he seemed to be calming down, the old man would get another surge of emotion, waving his arms and cursing.
‘Whoa, Sir, stop, stop!’
With the bottle in hand, the old man’s body lurched forward as he swung his arms.
Eun-gyo grabbed him in surprise, but he was already too far tilted.
Reflexively, he put all his strength into the arm holding him and yanked him back.
The problem was the recoil.
The old man fell toward the inside of the bridge, but Eun-gyo’s body pitched forward—and fell straight into the black waters of the Han River.
***
“Huk!”
The sensation of his breath being cut off made Eun-gyo clutch his throat and bolt upright.
After blinking several times, he realized this was Sinhye Kingdom, the Crown Prince’s residence, and let out a long breath.
“What dream did you have?”
Damn, that scared me.
Startled by the voice right beside him, he turned to find the Crown Prince sitting there.
How long had he been watching?
If he came, why didn’t he wake him instead of spying on him?
He was wondering whether he should greet him and ask about his return, when the Crown Prince rose and came right up to him.
Eun-gyo, sitting by the window, had to look up at him.
“I asked what dream you had.”
He was trying to control even his dreams now, it seemed.
“It was just something that happened before…”
Eun-gyo’s eyes wavered as he answered.
The Crown Prince had reached out and wiped his eye with his thumb.
“Was it something so sad that you cried?”
Only then did Eun-gyo realize he’d been crying.
He must have been weeping in his dream, and his real body followed suit.
Ah, how embarrassing.
It was even more mortifying that the Crown Prince was acting unexpectedly gentle.
He tried to turn his head away to avoid his gaze, but his face was firmly held.
“Who is Ha-yoon?”
The Crown Prince’s voice had dropped to a chilling temperature, a stark contrast from moments before.
Loving this chapter? You'll be hooked on Even if I’m Just a Little Sparrow, I Really Want To Improve! Click to explore more!
Read : Even if I’m Just a Little Sparrow, I Really Want To Improve
If You Notice any translation issues or inconsistency in names, genders, or POV etc? Let us know here in the comments or on our Discord server, and we’ll fix it in current and future chapters. Thanks for helping us to improve! 🙂