Chapter 14: The Weight of Truth

People often agree with the sentiment, “My pain might not be the same as the pain others feel,” yet Polaris pessimistically believed that truly understanding this notion was a rare feat in the world.

The seemingly youngest red-haired girl in the room gazed intently into Ye Xiaoshuang’s clear eyes, discerning within them a strength, though subtle, that could not be ignored. Upon hearing Ye Xiaoshuang’s answer, she offered neither affirmation nor denial, for as she had stated, she had not come to judge, but merely to comprehend the girl’s feelings.

“I understand. Thank you, Ye Xiaoshuang.”

In turn, she sincerely extended her gratitude to the two magical girls.

“And of course, thank you, Asherah, Baoyu. Thank you for choosing to believe in this child.”

Asherah, praised by her senior, blushed slightly, yet she was certain that the familiar senior before her had indeed undergone some inexplicable transformation. In truth, she wasn’t particularly keen on such formal thanks, as the formality always created a sense of distance.

“Senior would definitely have done the same if she were here. I’m just trusting Senior’s judgment and trying to emulate her. I’m still far from Senior’s level.”

“It’s wonderful to see you so energetic, Asherah, but—”

Polaris’s tone abruptly shifted. Folding her arms across her chest, she began to enumerate the shortcomings of Asherah’s recent actions.

“Involving an inexperienced newcomer in combat is extremely dangerous. Baoyu hasn’t undergone training or tests and still doesn’t fully understand her own abilities, making self-preservation in a fight against a Corrupted difficult for her. Furthermore, I just received Baoyu’s registration report, and according to its description, you entangled her after she discovered your identity, didn’t you? You failed to maintain secrecy according to the Code, and you even wanted her to become a magical girl to share the risk of this secret with you. This completely violates regulations.”

“I also have several recent records showing a lack of proper reporting after you dealt with Corrupted entities, causing considerable trouble for the on-site cleanup crew. Lastly, while the outcome was positive, directly approaching the Corrupted core was utterly reckless. I’ve told you before, aside from notifying and reporting before an operation, you yourself also need to be proficient in—”

“Waaah, I know I was wrong! Please stop, Senior, please stop! I truly understand my mistakes!”

Witnessing Asherah’s frantic plea, hands pressed together as if she were about to kneel, Polaris’s heart softened. She relented, placing the tablet containing the ‘evidence’ aside.

“Apologizing to me won’t help. In short, because of your recent series of rash actions, the Magical Oversight Department is quite exasperated with you. Considering various factors, we will temporarily no longer allow you to act alone.”

Hearing her punishment, Asherah, who had moments ago appeared utterly pathetic, immediately regained her vigor. As if grasping something, she leaned her body closer to Polaris.

“Then surely Senior, you’ll be the one to—”

“Sit properly and listen to me calmly first.”

“Okay.”

Pressing down on Asherah’s head, Polaris gently guided the perpetually troublesome girl back into her seat.

“I’ve spoken about this before, haven’t I, Asherah?”

Polaris calmly delivered a piece of news that was both shocking and sorrowful.

“I no longer possess the ability to serve as a magical girl.”

Her tone was flat, her expression unchanged, as if she were articulating an inevitable truth that had long been settled and bore no personal connection to her.

“…”

The individuals present watched as the anticipation on Asherah’s face gradually gave way to complete disappointment. She tried to speak several times, her words catching in her throat, before finally biting her lip and saying nothing at all.

Baoyu, seated beside Asherah, observed her slightly clenched hands, understanding that something unpleasant must have transpired. Polaris’s assertion about no longer being able to serve as a magical girl also piqued her curiosity, but she was adept at reading the atmosphere and wouldn’t pry into another’s wounds for a mere flicker of inquisitiveness.

“I know you’ve been acting alone ever since the team disbanded, and you even rejected the team we found for you back then. I understand we didn’t explain things well at the time, but this is the reality, Asherah. The Rainbow Ring squad is over. Everyone isn’t coming back.”

“No, that’s not true.”

Asherah reacted almost defensively to Polaris’s words, denying them with all her might, her voice growing progressively weaker: “Don’t say that, Senior. Once you speak the word ‘finished,’ it truly becomes finished, doesn’t it?”

If Polaris were truly just a naive little girl, as her appearance suggested, she would undoubtedly have felt sympathy or reluctance at Asherah’s almost pleading demeanor. However, beneath that youthful exterior resided a soul far more mature than any of the girls present, and thus, she did not respond to Asherah’s expectations. Instead, with an almost cold detachment, she continued to tear at Asherah’s dwindling illusions.

“Look forward, Asherah. Stop dwelling on us. Cherish your current companions.”

“Why? Why did everyone suddenly leave? ‘Foamsnow,’ ‘Mandrake,’ and ‘Shattered Diamond’—we were all so close before, we fought together for so long, so why did everyone just leave? And Senior, why did you tell me nothing?”

Confusion, rooted deep within her heart, had sprouted and, nourished by time and emotion, unleashed thorny vines that tightly bound her inner self, leaving behind trails of blood-stained scars.

Asherah couldn’t comprehend the distinction Polaris drew between past companions and present ones. She couldn’t fathom everyone’s secrecy, or the almost universal departure without a word. In her memory, she had merely glanced away for a moment, only to turn back and find the smiles, memories, and beauty she cherished so deeply had suddenly shattered, becoming utterly out of reach.

“I can’t accept it, Senior. It’s as if our squad was broken after that one battle I don’t know about. Everyone seems so strange, so unfamiliar.”

Baoyu sat on her seat as if on pins and needles, instinctively feeling that these details were not meant for her ears. These stories of those who came before, these finished tales, should not drag her emotions into the vortex of the past. She did not want to see Asherah’s difficulty in accepting reality—that longing, that incomprehension, that sorrow—all of which only reminded her of her own vulnerability when confronting her inner wounds.

“These matters, Asherah, you don’t need to know.”

“Why, Senior? I was also a member of the Rainbow Ring squad! Why am I the only one who can’t know?”

“It holds no meaning for you as a magical girl. This is a conclusion reached jointly by me, by us, and by the Magical Oversight Department.”

This chilling pronouncement, delivered to the emotional girl, was akin to striking her raw nerve, prompting an irrational outburst.

“Then if I weren’t a magical girl…!”

“Asherah!”

Polaris’s voice, clearly tinged with anger, harshly cut Asherah off, bringing an abrupt end to their rather unpleasant conversation.

“…I’m going to the restroom.”

With palpable dissatisfaction, Asherah rose from her seat, while Baoyu averted her gaze, listening as the door opened and a series of footsteps faded into the distance.

The atmosphere, which had been congenial, transformed into one of estrangement in just a few exchanges. A heavy, awkward silence now permeated the room.

“My apologies for letting you witness that.”

Polaris watched the closed door, then turned back to the remaining two with a helpless smile. What she had said was a necessary truth, a correct choice from her perspective, but she was also keenly aware of two things: first, her approach was far from subtle, and second, doing what one believes is right does not always come without a cost. She wished to protect her comrades, yet could only achieve this by causing them pain—how clumsy of her. However, if Asherah were still present, the next question would be difficult for Polaris to voice, as it would agitate Asherah in a different way.

Polaris slowly rose from her chair and walked over to Ye Xiaoshuang, ready to fulfill her initial and most crucial task for coming here.

“May I borrow your hand, Ye Xiaoshuang?”

Still lost in the lingering tension of the recent argument, Ye Xiaoshuang appeared somewhat dazed. After she woodenly extended her hand, Polaris placed her own upon it, conjuring a warm, white aura of magic within their clasped palms.

“Ye Xiaoshuang, the person who gave you that key… were they a cold-looking, black-haired girl with not-very-long hair?”

Ye Xiaoshuang’s expression registered surprise, as she hadn’t yet had a chance to explain anything about that person to the woman who had just questioned her. She then nodded like a pecking chick, and while enjoying the warm, comfortable sensation in her hand, she further elaborated on the person’s characteristics: “Yes, and that person had very beautiful purple eyes, wore our school uniform, and suddenly appeared to save me before disappearing just as abruptly.”

As Ye Xiaoshuang spoke, she noticed the increasingly complex expression on Polaris’s face. The mysterious girl who had appeared on the rooftop had saved her life, so in her subconscious thoughts, she always harbored a sense of gratitude and goodwill towards her. Only now did she belatedly realize that the ability which had caused her to become a Corrupted entity could hardly be something a magical girl would wield… Faced with the magical girls who had saved her, Ye Xiaoshuang couldn’t help but question the purity of her own goodwill.

At the same moment, Polaris also found what she was looking for on Ye Xiaoshuang’s person: the residual magic from that key.

The warm, white glow suddenly grew murky, as if tainted by impurities, until it became a lost, dark gray. Under Polaris’s deliberate guidance, this gray quickly receded from Ye Xiaoshuang’s hand, then rapidly climbed onto Polaris’s own body. For magical girls, magic associated with Corrupted entities was potent poison, yet Polaris insisted on directly touching this polluted magic with her body, until the aberrant gray nearly covered half of her, as if she had been struck by a legendary petrification spell.

“…So it was you after all.”

Through this somewhat incomprehensible method, Polaris seemed to confirm something as she murmured to herself. Subsequently, the gray magic adhering to her body began to dissipate in large areas, transforming into thin mist that rapidly dissolved into the air. In almost the blink of an eye, Polaris shed the impure magic and returned to her original state.

“Regarding what just happened, I hope you can both keep it a secret for me. Please don’t tell Asherah.”

Although Polaris spoke in a requesting tone, both Baoyu and Ye Xiaoshuang knew they had no choice in the matter, so they both nodded, indicating they would keep Polaris’s secret. Polaris then thanked them again and informed Ye Xiaoshuang that as a party involved in the incident, she would need to remain at the Magical Oversight Department for a few more days due to various considerations.

“Everyone here won’t dislike you. We will all help you through this difficult time, and we will be here for you. So, don’t worry too much, Ye Xiaoshuang. Everything will be alright.”

The uncertainty of the future made Ye Xiaoshuang somewhat hesitant, but out of trust in the magical girls, she still nodded.

“Can… I ask one more question?”

“Of course, you may.”

Everything that had transpired over the past two days flashed rapidly through Ye Xiaoshuang’s mind. The chaotic thoughts made it difficult for her to articulate her feelings, but ultimately, she gathered her courage and presented her confusion to Polaris in the simplest way.

“Is that person… a bad person?”

Polaris paused slightly. This was a question she had pondered many times, questioning herself repeatedly. However, sensing the confusion in Ye Xiaoshuang’s words, a gentle, benevolent smile graced her youthful face.

“This question doesn’t require an answer from others. Your feelings are the only correct answer, Ye Xiaoshuang. Besides, I believe you’ve already found your answer, haven’t you?”

“Trust yourself, Ye Xiaoshuang.”