Chapter 16 : Interlude: I’d Rather Die

Click.

Huddled in the corner of her bed, Ye Qingshu clearly heard the sound of someone entering the house.

Wrapping herself tighter in her blanket, she seemed terrified of being dragged out of this, her only safe haven.

No lights were on, and the sky was darkening. The room was shrouded in shadows, hazy like a dream.

Maybe it was a dream?

Ye Qingshu closed her eyes.

It’s a dream, right? Everything since middle school—just her overthinking, her anxious imagination.

Deep breath. Sleep well, and when she wakes, she’ll find herself napping on the school rooftop. Zhu Hanqi would be mocking her while draping his jacket over her, and Mu Ziqing would be munching a rice ball, memorizing vocab…

Just a dream. Just a dream. Just a dream. Just a dream. Just a dream…

Knock knock.

Ye Qingshu’s body trembled, her vacant gaze fixed on the door where the sound came from.

Knock knock.

“Open the door.”

Not a hallucination.

Propping herself up, Ye Qingshu moved like a machine, crawling off the bed, twisting the doorknob, and opening a sliver of light.

“Mom?”

“Come out.”

Her usually gentle mother’s voice carried a frostiness. Through the gap, Ye Qingshu saw Ye Yushu on the couch, glaring at her room with disdain.

“I…”

“Family meeting.”

Gu Ningxi’s tone left no room for refusal.

Family meeting… The last one was probably about Zhu Hanqi’s birthday, right? But she’d dodged it, claiming she had to study.

With heavy steps, Ye Qingshu tried to sit next to her sister. Ye Yushu, as if repulsed by something filthy, stood and moved to a single-seater couch.

Her mom pulled up a stool. The large sofa held only Ye Qingshu, making her feel like she was on trial.

“What… are we discussing?”

“We know the cause of those rumors,” Gu Ningxi said calmly, but that calm scared Ye Qingshu more.

Unlike the anger and disappointment when she confessed that afternoon, Gu Ningxi was now composed, and Ye Yushu sat quietly, her clear eyes observing everything.

“I truly regret asking you to invite him to our house for dinner.”

“Mom…” Ye Qingshu pleaded, but Gu Ningxi showed no sign of stopping.

“My meddling gave that boy a false sense of warmth. And because of that, you had the chance to trample his sincerity—I deeply regret it. It’s my fault for handing you the knife to stab his heart.”

“…”

Like tiny arrows piercing her heart, Ye Qingshu gripped her pajamas, nails digging into her palms.

“I don’t care about the rumors’ truth anymore. Ye Qingshu, just one thing—did you do anything disgusting like that?”

Gu Ningxi took a deep breath, her voice trembling as she asked.

“!”

Snapping her head up, seeing her mother’s disappointment and Ye Yushu’s disbelief, Ye Qingshu tried to stand but collapsed to the floor.

“I didn’t! I really didn’t!”

Grabbing Gu Ningxi’s hand, as if to prove her sincerity, Ye Qingshu cried out desperately.

“Mom, you can take me to the hospital to check! I didn’t! I’d never do that with someone I don’t like! I’m not like that!”

“Please believe me!!”

“I didn’t…”

…

“I thought you liked Hanqi-ge.”

Amid Ye Qingshu’s increasingly faint, fragile pleas, Ye Yushu spoke softly.

“To me, even though you were always mean to him, acting superior, bossy, and ordering him around… I thought you liked him.”

“Yushu…”

Ye Qingshu called her sister’s name in pain, as if to stop her.

“But now, I think either I was wrong, or your feelings were too cheap.”

Ye Yushu stared at her sister, clenching her fists.

“I thought Hanqi-ge liked you too—at least before, he definitely liked you a lot!”

“It hurt, knowing I was a million times better to him, cared a million times more, liked him a million times more—but if he only had eyes for you, I could only step aside and wish him well.”

“Because I’m not you. I can’t make him like me that much. His happiness matters most.”

Gently, Ye Yushu touched Ye Qingshu’s cheek—the spot she’d slapped that afternoon.

“But now I get it. You don’t deserve him.”

“I’m done holding back.” She blinked, as if confessing or declaring war. “Unlike you, I’d announce to the whole school—no, the world—that I like him and want to marry him. That’s been my dream since I was little.”

“Unlike you, I never abandoned him or looked at anyone else. My body and soul are pure, liking only Hanqi-ge.”

“But I… those are just rumors!” Ye Qingshu tried to argue, but Ye Yushu gave a smile too mature for her age.

“Maybe. But the thing is, he won’t believe you anymore.”

Ye Yushu said softly.

“He’s kind, so he’ll believe the rumors are false. But he won’t believe in you anymore. And that’s your fault. You deserve it.”

“So, Mom…”

Ignoring the frozen Ye Qingshu, Ye Yushu turned to Gu Ningxi.

“Don’t make Hanqi-ge our brother, okay? I’ll work hard to make him trust our family again… If he becomes my brother, I can’t—!”

“Mom, you want to make Hanqi a son?”

Ye Qingshu turned, staring at Gu Ningxi in disbelief.

“Why? You… haven’t mentioned that in ages…”

“Because I don’t believe you either.”

Gu Ningxi said flatly.

“When you and Hanqi grew closer, I stopped bringing it up.”

“Being called Mom and seeing you two together was enough for me. I didn’t care if gossipy old folks thought I was raising a live-in son-in-law, as long as you were happy.”

“But now, Ye Qingshu, I truly believe…”

Gu Ningxi looked at her daughter with cold eyes.

“His happiness matters more than yours.”

“But that means…!” Tears filled Ye Qingshu’s eyes.

That means…

“You’re not still dreaming I’d support your love life, are you?!”

“I don’t recall raising such a selfish, entitled idiot of a daughter! If you’re still clinging to that fantasy, wake up!”

Gu Ningxi’s scolding left Ye Qingshu stunned, fear almost tangible in her eyes.

“All I want now is for you to stop hurting him!”

…

In Ye Qingshu’s deathly silence, Gu Ningxi lowered her eyes.

“…But he refused.” Her face showed visible exhaustion and regret. “If he’d agreed, I’d have started the adoption process right away. I checked the requirements and documents this afternoon.”

“But how could he trust our family now?”

“If you’d admitted to doing those disgusting things, I’d have sent you out of the country. You’d never see him again.”

“You can’t hurt him anymore.”

“I don’t want to! I didn’t! I can get checked now—here, even! I never went out alone with that senior, my first kiss, my first night, I—!”

“Even so.”

Gu Ningxi sighed, looking at Ye Qingshu.

Swollen eyes, flushed cheeks, messy hair, face streaked with tears and snot.

The appearance she once took pride in now looked haggard and pathetic.

“I don’t want you near Zhu Hanqi anymore.”

“If you have even a shred of feelings for him, hide them, forget them, and stay away. That’s the only way you can make it up to him.”

“Can you do that?”

She looked at Ye Qingshu.

Silence filled the living room, so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

Only the breathing of the mother and daughters remained.

Ye Qingshu’s expression shifted from shock to confusion, then slowly to resolve.

“Mom.”

She looked gently at her mother, a calm smile on her face.

No hysterics, no panic.

“I won’t, Mom. Please.”

“I’d rather die.”