Chapter 81: Pitiful

After much deliberation, Tae Hwan, who had called a teleport Esper, finally headed to Bodam’s hospital room.

Since he was uninvited, he packed heavy bribes in both hands and stood in front of the door.

It was all food.

Because he had never eaten with him, he didn’t know what he liked, so he bought everything he could.

Feeling he shouldn’t eat bread anymore, he only chose healthy foods.

The memory of Bodam, who had eaten too many hamburgers and revealed his upset stomach, still remained as quite a shock.

Since it was his first confession in life, it was memorable.

“…What is it?”

Fearing that Bodam might dislike him even more if he only brought healthy food, he also bought kiln-roasted barbecue with herbal ingredients and fruit yogurt disguised as ice cream.

He swept up any food that wouldn’t harm his delicate body.

Even if he himself would be turned away at the door, he thought food would be let in.

In that moment the door opened, he might be able to see Yoon Bodam—.

“Where did he go?”

Standing in front of the hospital room door, which had no guard, a flustered Tae Hwan frowned.

The absence of a gatekeeper meant there was no one inside to guard.

Tae Hwan’s expression, as he flung the door open with psychokinesis, soon crumpled even further.

Several packaging bags, unable to withstand his grip, made a snapping sound as their straps broke.

The packaging containers fell noisily to the floor.

The contents of containers not properly sealed spilled onto the floor.

“Fuc—”

Tae Hwan, who had been chasing the empty bed and Yoon Bodam’s vanished aura, ended up dirtying the floor again.

Even though this time he had spilled food, not the gushing blood from his torn shoulder, he felt a similar pain.

In the confined space, between Yoon Bodam’s and the barrier Esper’s waves, a familiar presence remained.

It was clearly Han Seung Ho.

At the strong scent of the team leader, lingering even on the sofa and bed, a curse almost escaped him, but.

“……”

He didn’t utter it aloud.

***

‘Just a little more.’

Bodam, who was deeply asleep, listened to a sound coming from a place he couldn’t tell was a dream or reality.

‘A little more. Just a little.’

He didn’t need to deeply ponder whose voice it was.

It was obviously Kang Yi Jun’s voice, connected by natural imprinting.

The desperate aura transmitted through his skin resembled Yi Jun.

‘Hyung, I like you.’

Even in the nonsense he’d spout when bored, that aura always lingered.

‘Hyung, I like you so much.’

Bodam, waking from his sad sleep, thought about Yi Jun.

He was a bastard who always messed with him with a light tone, and who would blurt out choking confessions just when he was about to forget.

Trusting his natural intuition and outstanding ability, he also recalled how he used to run around the field until his body broke down.

Despite being an A-class Esper, Kang Yi Jun had poor stamina.

Although he was overwhelmingly stronger compared to ordinary people, when compared to Lee Tae Hwan and Min Ji Oh, he tired quickly and got hurt easily.

As for Han Seung Ho, he wasn’t human, so there was no comparison.

‘I like you enough to want to live.’

Especially when receiving guiding in a space alone with him, the nonsense worsened.

Even while cursing internally for him to stop watching dramas, when he felt an unknown sincerity, he held his breath.

Wondering if he really liked him.

‘I’ll only receive your guiding for my entire life, hyung.’

When reaching such absurd fantasies, a remark that snapped him back to reality always came.

‘Of course.’

Saying Kang Yi Jun liked his guiding, not him, he soothed his discomfort.

He wasn’t a guide so inexperienced that he couldn’t distinguish emotions evoked by a high matching rate.

Treating him so carelessly and hurting him like this, claiming to genuinely like him made no sense.

All of Kang Yi Jun’s words sounded like light nonsense.

But now.

‘Do you hate me?’

Not all his words sounded light.

“Did he cry?”

Bodam, sitting on the stool placed close to the bed, asked.

To the barrier Espers surrounding Yi Jun’s bed, he raised his head and clarified his question.

“When Kang Yi Jun woke up. I’m curious how he was.”

Looking down at the guide’s swollen face, one of the barrier Espers replied.

He was inwardly marveling at how round and plump his face could get, no matter how swollen it was.

He felt like if he poked it, it would make a soft, squishy sound.

“He only moved his hand a little and then muttered to himself in his sleepiness.

He mumbled so softly that we could barely understand him, so we couldn’t hear the content.”

Bodam, who nodded to the barrier Esper who relayed exactly what he saw, trailed off and asked again.

“Perhaps he cried or…”

“No. He was calm.”

Seeing Bodam, who closed his mouth as if there was nothing more to ask, the barrier Espers shifted their gaze to Team Leader Kim and Seung Ho.

Team Leader Kim was behind Bodam, and Seung Ho was standing far away in the researchers’ area.

Following their gaze, which was fixed on one spot, the barrier Espers also watched Bodam again.

His severely swollen white face had only his nose tip and eye corners flushed red.

Every time he took a long breath, his long eyelashes rose and fell.

Although 30 minutes had passed since he arrived in the hospital room, he showed no particular words or actions.

“You may leave.”

At the sudden and welcome surprise order to leave work, the barrier Espers’ widened eyes simultaneously turned towards Seung Ho.

They had already been thinking that there was no need for them to be here, with two capable team-leader level barrier Espers already present.

As long as Team Leader Han Seung Ho was there, it was a waste of unnecessary manpower.

Although the instruction to return by midnight was disappointing, their lips curved up to their ears.

Thinking of finally stretching out and sleeping in a bed after a long time, they happily left the hospital room.

As the number of eyes watching diminished, Bodam’s rigid posture relaxed slightly.

He looked down more closely at Yi Jun, who still looked bruised and dark.

After removing the oxygen mask, revealing his chapped lips, they were slightly parted.

Even breaths passed between them.

Just as he had been told, Kang Yi Jun truly slept soundly, with no sign of waking.

He wondered what kind of dream he was having.

He wanted to know if it was the same dream as his.

The most curious thing was the dream’s content, but.

“……”

Bodam couldn’t remember the dream he had while deeply asleep.

Even though he clearly remembered the emotions that were sad and agonizing enough to make him sick of them, whenever he tried to recall the content, only pitch-black darkness appeared.

In that darkness was Kang Yi Jun desperately searching for him.

“He sleeps well.”

Bodam, who listened intently to the even breaths, watched Yi Jun closely.

Among the twenty-year-olds he knew, the most unusual, foul-tempered, and crazy-seeming one, he thought about Yi Jun, who now looked sad.

“Doesn’t he even feel pain…”

Bodam, whose thoughts lingered on Yi Jun’s immature age, trailed off again at the end of his muttering.

Kang Yi Jun, with whom he felt he would never have any common ground even if he died tomorrow, and his own twenty-year-old self, frankly, seemed to overlap.

Bodam, who pulled the chair a little closer to the bed and sat down, placed his hand on the blanket.

From his cheek, hardened like tree bark grown in dry land, he peeled off an electrode pad.

On his weakened skin, a mark from where the pad had been attached remained again, as expected.

Bodam, who placed his hand over the mark, said very softly.

“Recover quickly.”

The more he felt Yi Jun’s emotions, the more he recalled his own young, twenty-year-old self.

Bodam had also been very lonely.

His early twenties, which should have been bright, were the darkest period for Bodam.

Despite not knowing how to do anything properly, young Bodam, who had worked himself to death, was truly lonely.

He had neither the mental space nor the will to make friends.

“I’m not doing this because you’re pretty.”

Still, Bodam had a loving family.

He had a mother who encouraged them to live diligently together, and a strong younger sibling who could survive well anywhere.

After enduring the difficult period, he even met a lifelong friend, like a gift.

When he was exhausted, Jo Yeon would appear like a ghost and call his name, which allowed him to smile more brightly.

However, Kang Yi Jun seemed to have no one.

Beneath the hand cupping his cheek, he infused warm power.

Covering his hatred for him with pity, he guided with all his might.

Kang Yi Jun’s crazy-bastard-like face flashed by one after another.

When recalling the irritating days that worsened day by day, he still felt so angry that his chest grew hot.

He was clearly angry, but.

But.

“If you throw up blood again, I’ll never guide you again.”

Even if it was words he wouldn’t hear because he was asleep, he muttered them to fill the quiet silence.

Unable to control his own emotions, Kang Yi Jun, who would laugh several times a day then suddenly turn hostile, was always angry.

It wasn’t an anger loudly expressed like Lee Tae Hwan or Min Ji Oh, but a chilling rage that could be felt.

Because Bodam also had a lot of anger, he could feel it better.

He only knew how to suppress it, so it didn’t show, but Bodam had often raged internally, like clanging gongs.

“I…”

Bodam didn’t know how to properly get angry, so he only cried.

Kang Yi Jun, who had lived a different life, seemed to be the opposite.

“Don’t make me hate you more here.”

He pressed hard with his palm, cupping his cheek and warning him.

Though it was meant as a warning, infinitely gentle words slipped out.

Kang Yi Jun, he was pitiful.

He, the only existence Kang Yi Jun clung to, only hated him, making him even more pitiful.

‘He should have lived a little kinder, then.’

“……”

The hand that was concentrating on guiding twitched for an instant.

Yi Jun’s head, awakening from sleep, slowly tilted in the direction where Bodam’s palm was touching.