Chapter 52: Past

The car drove into the Huze Tingyuan estate, but it didn’t stop at the Pei residence; instead, it pulled up at the gates of the Gu family mansion.

Like a wooden puppet that could be manipulated at will, Yu Xi had been led by Gu Chuanzhou the entire way—getting into the car, riding in it, getting out, and then walking into the Gu family villa.

Even when pressed down to sit on the sofa, he didn’t offer a single shred of resistance. His vacant eyes rested on empty space, and he neither spoke nor thought, looking as if his soul had been extracted, leaving behind nothing but a shell.

When Gu Chuanzhou spoke to him, the words failed to reach his ears, eliciting no reaction whatsoever.

Not until Gu Chuanzhou took hold of the hand he had kept tucked inside his coat pocket from the very beginning, pulling it out along with the object he had been clutching tightly in his palm, did he shudder violently as if startled.

Thud!

The object slipped from his hand and fell, letting out a muffled thud against the carpet. It was unmistakably a folding knife.

Yu Xi’s breathing hitched. The hand that had dropped the object still maintained a gripping posture, trembling unstoppably.

Yet Gu Chuanzhou merely cast a light, fleeting glance at the object on the carpet, treating it as if it were nothing more than an ordinary item, and continued helping Yu Xi take off his thick down jacket: “Xixi, lift your arms.”

“…” After several seconds of silence, Yu Xi cooperated mechanically.

“So good,” Gu Chuanzhou praised in a warm voice. He placed the removed clothing on the other side of the sofa, then touched Yu Xi’s freezing fingertips. “Why are they still so cold? Are you thirsty? I’ll go pour you some water.”

As he rose, the hem of his clothes was lightly tugged.

From a downward angle, all that could be seen was Yu Xi’s fluffy, lowered head, along with his slender eyelashes and prominent nose tip.

The hand clutching the hem of his clothes only pinched a tiny corner, barely utilizing any force at all. That gentle tug just now resembled a kitten hooking with its claw; if one didn’t pay close attention, it would easily be ignored.

Gu Chuanzhou neither moved nor spoke, waiting patiently.

After a long time, he finally heard the youth say in a voice as faint as a mosquito’s buzz: “Not thirsty.”

A very shallow trace of a smile flashed through Gu Chuanzhou’s eyes, and he sat back down beside Yu Xi: “Then I will keep Xixi company.”

The two sat together, arm against arm. Neither spoke, just sitting quietly like that.

Yu Xi’s hand kept pinching the corner of Gu Chuanzhou’s clothes the entire time, and there was no telling whether he had forgotten to let go or was seeking some form of security.

The phone rang, shattering the tranquility.

Yu Xi heard a voice travel out from Gu Chuanzhou’s phone; the person on the other end was reporting that the matter had already been taken care of. Gu Chuanzhou replied flatly: “Mm, keep an eye on him. Don’t let him run away.”

Yu Xi instantly understood what matter was being referred to, and he lifted his eyelashes to look over.

Gu Chuanzhou’s gentle gaze had been resting on him the entire time, and he quickly hung up the phone: “What’s wrong?”

Yu Xi hesitated to speak: “How… are you going to handle it?”

“How does Xixi want to handle it?”

Gu Chuanzhou threw the question back. Yu Xi hadn’t expected this; he looked up blankly, unconsciously rubbing the corner of Gu Chuanzhou’s clothes pinched between his fingertips. “I-I hope you won’t talk with him.”

Gu Chuanzhou agreed very crisply: “Mm, what else?”

Yu Xi gathered a bit more courage: “Don’t bother with him anymore either. Don’t view him as my father.”

Gu Chuanzhou nodded: “Okay, anything else?”

Yu Xi thought for a moment, then shook his head.

“Those are very simple, but what I mean is how Xixi wants him to be dealt with.” Seeing the bewildered look on Yu Xi’s face, Gu Chuanzhou let out a low chuckle. “Do you want him to never come disturb you again, disappearing completely, or do you want him to suffer immensely as a harsh retaliation?”

Yu Xi froze once more, staring at Gu Chuanzhou in astonishment: “Aren’t you going to ask me about anything else?”

Gu Chuanzhou took hold of his hand: “If you don’t want me to know, then I will never ask.”

“…”

Even though he knew Gu Chuanzhou’s feelings, Yu Xi was still surprised by Gu Chuanzhou’s tolerance toward him.

No, it should be called indulgence.

Asking for no reasons, only asking for the outcome, standing entirely on his side.

Even if… the thing he did was so bad.

Yu Xi lowered his eyes to look at the folding knife that had been ignored on the floor, his expression dazed.

Since Gu Chuanzhou could go to such lengths for him, shouldn’t he also take the initiative to step a bit closer and offer more trust?

He had originally intended to resolve it alone without affecting anyone, but in the end, he had still entangled Gu Chuanzhou. Therefore… Gu Chuanzhou also had the right to know.

“You can ask,” Yu Xi tilted his face up, meeting Gu Chuanzhou’s gaze. “I can tell you everything.”

Gu Chuanzhou understood immediately that this was a signal transmitted by Yu Xi. A signal of entrusting trust, baring his heart, and also “crying for help.”

He naturally had to catch it firmly.

“Alright, tell it to me.”

…

This was the first time Yu Xi had spoken to another person about himself and his parents.

Everything started from the beginning.

His mother, Qi Qingyun, came from a impoverished background. Relying on her excellent grades, she got admitted into the city’s key high school, where she made friends with her best friend, Pei Lexin, and also met the school’s notorious playboy, Yu Xuelin.

Yu Xuelin fell in love with Qi Qingyun at first sight and pursued her passionately, but Qi Qingyun prioritized her studies and never responded to this affection.

Later, Qi Qingyun got admitted to a prestigious university, and the two lost contact. It wasn’t until five years later, when Yu Xuelin returned to the country, that they met again. At that time, he appeared more mature and stable, yet he still carried a shred of the enthusiasm from his youth, being incredibly attentive and considerate toward Qi Qingyun.

Qi Qingyun was moved.

They began a romantic relationship.

Pei Lexin vehemently opposed this relationship: “Yu Xuelin is completely unreliable! Don’t look at how glamorous he appears and how lavishly he spends; he’s just an illegitimate son who can’t be brought to light! The Yu family has been on a downward slope; whether he can even secure actual power is hard to say. This man is simply untrustworthy, you shouldn’t be blinded by him!”

Qi Qingyun only said: “Lexin, you forgot; my background isn’t good either, and what I fell for wasn’t the Yu family behind him or the luxury goods he gives. He loves me, and that’s enough.”

Pei Lexin still found Yu Xuelin unappealing in every way, giving him a cold face every time they met for meals.

Later, Qi Qingyun’s father was diagnosed with cancer. Yu Xuelin provided a large amount of money for his medical treatment, which only managed to keep Father Qi around for an extra half a year. A year later, her mother also passed away in deep grief.

Losing both parents in succession was a massive blow to Qi Qingyun.

To make her happy, Yu Xuelin planned a proposal.

He expended massive effort to convince the Yu family to accept Qi Qingyun. After enduring a round of family punishment, he knocked on Qi Qingyun’s door with a ring and a back full of whip scars.

Seeing that Yu Xuelin had given his genuine devotion, Pei Lexin no longer raised objections to their marriage and became a bridesmaid at their wedding.

A year after the marriage, Qi Qingyun became pregnant and gave birth to Yu Xi.

During the first few years, their family did live through a period of happiness and joy.

Until the Yu family declared bankruptcy. Yu Xuelin first failed in his investments, and was then dragged into a casino by a former partner, where he tasted the sweet rewards.

Qi Qingyun had tried to advise him, but Yu Xuelin couldn’t bear to let go of the massive returns that were within easy reach, falling completely into the trap.

Once a gambling addiction is contracted, one will fall into an abyss of eternal damnation.

When the debts piled up high, Yu Xi was seven years old.

That day, he returned home from school happily just like usual, only to find a scattered mess all over the house.

He couldn’t understand the strange atmosphere between the adults; he could only tell that his mother’s eyes were swollen.

He asked: “Mother, why are you crying? Did you argue with Father again?”

Qi Qingyun held him close and told him that they had to move to a place very, very far away.

They moved once, and then again. The “home” they moved to became increasingly remote and increasingly cramped.

The young Yu Xi didn’t care where his home was or how large it was, nor did he care that the food on the table decreased or that his clothes became simpler. What he cared about was that his father became more and more of a stranger and grew increasingly violent. He no longer held him, no longer kissed him, and always looked at him with an expression of disgust—as if looking at a piece of burdensome trash. Meanwhile, his mother became busier and busier, working harder and harder; her smiles decreased, her health deteriorated, and she always saved all the food for him while going hungry herself.

Most importantly, his mother always cried at night.

Later, his mother stopped crying. She would just sit in silence, often sitting for an entire night.

His mother’s thin and solitary back remained vividly preserved in Yu Xi’s mind. Every time he recalled it, his heart would throb with pain: “My mother… she was supposed to keep deeply cultivating the scientific research she loved the most. She was very amazing and very smart, but precisely because of Yu Xuelin, she had to give up everything.”

The debt wasn’t just one or two million, but an unimaginable figure that grew every single day, rolling larger and larger like a snowball.

The loan sharks were utterly wicked, using every means available. If the debt couldn’t be repaid, what was destroyed was far more than just oneself and one’s family; even all the surrounding relatives and friends would suffer.

Qi Qingyun didn’t want to involve anyone, so she followed Yu Xuelin around to hide everywhere, scraping by just to survive.

She didn’t give up because of this. Relying on her knowledge, she took on a lot of private freelance work, simultaneously holding down multiple jobs, while also forcing Yu Xuelin to do hard manual labor to repay the debt.

She had grown up enduring hardships, so she wasn’t afraid of them; she only feared that her child wouldn’t be able to have a good future.

Seeing Yu Xi grow up, she didn’t want to be weak any longer.

She said to Yu Xi: “Xiao Xi, you are Mommy’s child, you will definitely be smarter than Mommy. You only need to study hard; you don’t need to worry about anything else. Mommy will work hard herself, these aren’t things you should bear.”

This year, Yu Xi was thirteen, an age to enter junior high school. She proposed a divorce to Yu Xuelin once again.

Yu Xuelin sneered and lifted a stool: “Divorce? Don’t even think about dumping me in this lifetime.”

Unsurprisingly, she was beaten once more, and she immediately called the police.

This time she was well-prepared, having gathered various pieces of evidence of Yu Xuelin’s domestic violence, gambling, and alcoholism to take him to court.

After expending two or three years of energy back and forth, she finally legally dissolved her marital relationship with Yu Xuelin and also obtained custody of Yu Xi.

However, the loan sharks never listened to reason. They couldn’t care less whether they were divorced or not, and Yu Xuelin also pestered them relentlessly, resembling a fly that couldn’t be driven away—utterly sickening.

No matter how they moved houses, those people always found a way to track them down.

In order for Yu Xi to attend school properly, Qi Qingyun could only negotiate with the creditors, voluntarily assuming half of the debt that didn’t originally belong to her, only begging that they would stop pestering them once it was paid off.

Qi Qingyun filled that hole bit by bit, and Yu Xi was also very successful, ranking among the top at school and placing first every single time.

By the time Yu Xi was eighteen, Qi Qingyun had paid off seventy percent of the debt.

Life finally had something to look forward to, but Yu Xuelin refused to let them have it easy. He repeatedly shattered their tranquility, using the guise of visitation rights to enter their home like a locust, plundering their belongings.

There were several times when Yu Xi returned home from school only to see a broken door lock, a chaotic house, and his numb-faced mother.

More often than not, when Yu Xuelin came to cause trouble, Yu Xi wasn’t around, and Qi Qingyun endured everything alone.

Only later did Yu Xi learn that Yu Xuelin used the threat of going to his school to cause a scene—letting all his classmates know he had such a terrible background—if she didn’t give him money, which was why Qi Qingyun chose to yield time and again.

On the day he received his admission notice, Yu Xi was filled with joy and wanted to tell his mother the good news. He hadn’t expected that the moment he pushed open the door, he would see Yu Xuelin again.

The other party was righteously rummaging through his and his mother’s home, saying he needed money to turn the tables at the casino.

At that time, Yu Xi was thinking: Why has this person in front of me become such a stranger? Did the father who used to carry me on his shoulders and call me his baby ever truly exist? When did he change, or was he rotten from the very beginning?

Just what will it take for him to let me go, to let me and my mother go?

Yu Xi had originally thought that as long as he got admitted to university, he would definitely be able to take his mother and completely change their destiny, throwing away all the terrible things. But looking at this scene, Yu Xi realized belatedly that as long as Yu Xuelin was alive, they would never be able to obtain peace.

Right… as long as Yu Xuelin was alive, it would be impossible to realize.

“At that time, I couldn’t hear anything and couldn’t feel anything, as if a knife had split my soul and my body into two halves.”

“There was only one thought in my mind—”

His body had moved on its own.

Only when the scalding blood splattered onto his hand did Yu Xi snap out of it as if waking from a dream, realizing what he had done.

“I picked up the knife.”

Yu Xi stared at the folding knife on the carpet. He blinked his dry eyes and slowly lifted a face covered in tears, flashing a crumpled smile at Gu Chuanzhou, “At that time, I truly wanted to kill Yu Xuelin.”

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