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Join the ServerWhite clouds drifted lazily across the sky.
The sun shone brightly.
While Lin Xiaoque watched the hunters below, some people were watching him.
The Empress did not look directly at him.
Instead, he watched from the corner of his eye.
He saw Lin Xiaoque’s long, slender fingers.
One hand rested casually on the arm of his chair, hanging naturally in the air.
Beneath the snow-white skin on the back of that hand, faint blue veins could be seen.
It made one worry that if the snow ever melted away, what would remain would be nothing but exposed veins and pale bones.
As though mountains and rivers were hidden inside his body.
As though if heaven and earth collapsed, mountains crumbled, and the world broke apart, Lin Xiaoque himself would be buried alongside the ruins.
At that moment, the Empress felt as if all the rivers and mountains of the empire were hidden within those hands.
Raging blood flowed like rivers.
Green mountains spread like veins across the land.
The pulse of the earth itself seemed to exist within him.
Compared to that, the spectacle of thousands of galloping horses below was only a fleeting moment.
Lin Xiaoque, however, seemed eternal.
Eternally struggling between vitality and collapse.
The Empress didn’t need to look directly to know what was in Lin Xiaoque’s eyes.
Envy.
He envied the powerful momentum below.
He envied that passionate vitality.
But he didn’t know that he himself was far more astonishing than that temporary display of force.
Despite constant illness and suffering, he had grown into a genuinely good person.
He had never come to hate the world because of his frail body.
He admired frost and snow.
He appreciated rain and dew.
He watched fine horses run with the wind.
He possessed a clear heart and bright eyes.
When had he begun paying more and more attention to Lin Xiaoque?
A memory surfaced.
It had been a winter night.
The Empress had been troubled by countless thoughts and unable to sleep.
Leaving his palace, he unexpectedly encountered someone.
The sudden figure nearly frightened him half to death.
Only after looking carefully did he realize it was Lin Xiaoque.
The boy had secretly slipped out of his own palace.
Earlier that day he had wanted to play in the snow and build a snowman.
The servants had forbidden it.
Outwardly, he had obediently agreed.
Then, after nightfall, he sneaked out like a thief and quietly made his way to the plum grove.
The grove stood very close to the Empress’s residence.
Seeing a mysterious figure rustling around among the trees in the darkness, the Empress had genuinely thought he was seeing a ghost.
Holding a tiny snowman in both hands, Lin Xiaoque looked up awkwardly.
“Your Majesty… it’s me.”
The Empress naturally asked what he was doing.
“The winter night is freezing.”
“Why aren’t you back in your palace?”
Lin Xiaoque explained that he had built a snowman.
A very small one.
Only the size of a palm.
“It won’t make me catch cold.”
He knew his health was poor.
Building a large snowman would take too long.
A tiny one was enough to satisfy his craving.
The plum grove smelled wonderful.
Snow gathered from plum blossoms carried their fragrance.
A snowman made from such snow would naturally be special.
“The plum must yield three parts of whiteness to snow, but snow loses one measure of fragrance to plum blossoms.”
His tiny snowman possessed both.
The whiteness of snow.
The fragrance of plum blossoms.
To Lin Xiaoque, it was the finest snowman in the world.
Listening to him, the Empress suddenly felt his nose sting.
He almost wanted to cry.
Without understanding why, he walked over and crouched down beside him.
Then he built a large snowman.
A very large one.
He told Lin Xiaoque:
“Your little snowman should have a bigger companion.”
“That way it won’t be lonely.”
Lin Xiaoque’s red, swollen hands carefully placed the small snowman beside the larger one.
Chu Cizhao gently held Lin Xiaoque’s hands, trying to warm them.
Yet his own hands were equally cold.
An adult Chu Cizhao held the hands of the young Lin Xiaoque.
Slowly, warmth emerged amidst the coldness and swelling.
Lin Xiaoque looked up.
His eyes were clear and bright.
“Why are you so kind to me, Your Majesty?”
“Why would you join me in doing something so childish?”
Chu Cizhao answered:
“When I was young, I also had many foolish dreams.”
“Dreams far more outrageous than playing with snow.”
“What happened afterward?” Lin Xiaoque asked.
Chu Cizhao froze for a moment.
Then he smiled faintly.
“Afterward…”
“I woke up.”
He led Lin Xiaoque back to Yong’an Palace and instructed the servants to warm him and apply medicine to his hands.
The next day, Chu Cizhao ordered people to protect both snowmen.
No one was allowed to damage them.
But eventually spring arrived.
The snow melted.
When he returned to visit, all that remained was a patch of dirty slush.
Then spring came.
The Crown Prince kissed Lin Xiaoque.
From that day onward, the Empress deliberately distanced himself.
His emotions churned violently.
Outwardly he appeared cold and displeased.
In truth, he cared far too much.
Almost more than he could bear.
When Chu Cizhao had been young, he too had possessed countless dreams.
He had wanted to become a general.
Or a statesman who governed for the people’s welfare.
He had dreamed of retreating into the mountains to write books.
Or living quietly in the marketplace.
He wanted to fish as a fisherman.
Farm as a farmer.
Practice martial arts and become a wandering hero.
Travel the world.
Cross thousands of rivers and mountains.
The moment he became Crown Princess, those dreams shattered.
Almost everyone’s expectations for him condensed into a single duty:
Bear children.
Give the Crown Prince heirs.
Provide descendants for the imperial family.
That would become his achievement.
His glory.
His future was to be virtuous and gentle.
Only that road remained open.
And so he walked it.
Stepping over the shattered fragments of brilliant dreams.
Walking deeper and deeper into darkness.
But anyone would fear walking a single road forever.
He was no exception.
Looking at Lin Xiaoque, he both feared and treasured his feelings.
Jealousy.
Concern.
Sleepless longing.
Desire.
Fantasy.
Within this shameful affection, he felt alive.
Not like a bird trapped inside a gilded cage.
The horses below had long since disappeared into the distance.
Only tiny figures remained visible across the vast hunting grounds.
Lin Xiaoque felt slightly disappointed.
He too wanted to ride away.
Free and unrestrained.
Beneath the sky.
Across the earth.
Running endlessly forward.
He withdrew his gaze.
Gradually he became aware of the Empress’s attention.
Turning his head, he looked over.
Yet all he saw was the Empress staring quietly into his tea.
The slender fingers holding the celadon cup resembled peeled scallion roots.
The image looked like a beautiful ink painting.
Lin Xiaoque quickly looked away.
He didn’t dare stare.
Then his gaze passed beyond the Empress.
Suddenly he noticed someone kneeling beside the Emperor’s seat.
Someone he had seen before.
The same mask.
The same fingers that looked carved from white jade.
Because Emperor Xiao Juan was tall and broad, the kneeling figure had been completely hidden behind him.
Only after Xiao Juan left did Lin Xiaoque finally notice the person.
This time, the man was dressed appropriately.
Unlike that night, he wore nothing suggestive or inappropriate.
Yet for some reason, Lin Xiaoque couldn’t look away.
This was Xiao Juan’s favored concubine.
Or perhaps merely a bed s*ave.
His entire body carried the marks of belonging to the Emperor.
Lin Xiaoque shouldn’t be staring.
But his fingertips inexplicably began to itch.
His face grew slightly warm.
He had touched him before.
Inappropriately.
His hand had traveled from the back of the man’s neck all the way down his spine.
He had offended him.
Yet he didn’t even know his name.
“Yuesheng” was merely a name the Emperor had forced upon him.
What was his real name?
Why did he kneel beside the Emperor like a nameless s*ave?
Every other consort sat comfortably.
Only he knelt.
Hidden behind a mask.
Mysterious.
Lin Xiaoque’s attention drew the Ninth Prince’s gaze as well.
The child spotted Yuesheng.
More specifically—
He spotted the beautiful mask.
Immediately he began demanding it.
“I want it! I want it!”
Consort Li smacked him lightly.
“Nonsense.”
“How dare you ask for something that belongs to your Imperial Father?”
The Ninth Prince couldn’t properly explain himself.
He didn’t understand that it was a mask.
He simply kept saying:
“Pretty!”
“Want!”
That earned him another light smack.
Though the force wasn’t strong, the child immediately pouted and prepared to cry.
Annoyed, Consort Li put him down.
“If you’re going to cry, walk yourself.”
“Nobody’s carrying you.”
The Ninth Prince didn’t cry.
Instead, wobbling on his little legs, he walked straight toward Yuesheng.
Then he reached out for the mask.
Lin Xiaoque’s heart jumped into his throat.
He watched without blinking.
But Xie Zhichi dodged.
Faced with all these people, the mask was his final layer of skin.
If it were torn away…
He wasn’t sure he would still possess the courage to continue living.
The Ninth Prince continued making a fuss.
Seeing Yuesheng’s unwillingness, Lin Xiaoque stood and walked over.
Squatting before the child, he searched for something to distract him.
He had nothing suitable.
Finally, he untied his own hair ribbon and placed it into the boy’s hand.
“This is pretty too.”
“You can have this.”
Normally Lin Xiaoque secured his hair with a jade crown.
But today was a hunting day.
A ribbon was sufficient.
For festive luck, the ribbon was bright red.
Golden thread embroidered delicate lotus patterns along its length.
The Ninth Prince looked somewhat dissatisfied.
A ribbon? That’s all?
Still, because it came from Lin Xiaoque, he accepted it.
Stretching out his arm, he demanded:
“Tie it.”
Laughing, Lin Xiaoque tied the ribbon around the child’s wrist.
Then he lifted him into his arms.
The Ninth Prince stared at his chubby arm in fascination.
Under the sunlight, the golden embroidery glittered brilliantly.
The lotus flowers seemed alive.
Floating upon a river of gold and crimson.
The child immediately settled into Lin Xiaoque’s embrace and refused to leave.
Consort Li was mortified.
She ordered the nanny to remove him immediately.
The Ninth Prince babbled incomprehensibly.
“Don’t go…”
“Stay…”
But he was still carried away.
As he left, he reached desperately toward Lin Xiaoque.
Unable to catch him.
The red ribbon fluttered in the wind.
With his hair now loose, Lin Xiaoque was no longer properly dressed according to etiquette.
He excused himself and left to fix his appearance.
Yet outside the courtyard, he encountered someone unexpected.
Marquis Qin Min.
The marquis stood beside a horse, holding its reins.
At some point he had left the hunting grounds.
He appeared to be waiting for someone.
When Qin Min saw him, he smiled.
And in that instant, Lin Xiaoque understood.
The person Qin Min had been waiting for…was him.
The adventure continues! If you loved this chapter, Looking For My Child's Father is a must-read. Click here to start!
Read : Looking For My Child's Father
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