Chapter 18: “A servant? No longer.”

“Don’t think of me as the Crown Prince’s mother.”

“Don’t think of me as the emperor’s wife.”

“Qie Yunu…”

Holding Lin Xiaoque’s hand, Chu Cizhao pressed it against his own chest.

“If only for a single moment…”

“Look past those identities.”

“See me.”

His voice was filled with both despair and hope.

The turmoil inside Lin Xiaoque’s heart was no longer like ants crawling beneath his skin.

It was a raging flood, overturning everything within him.

His eyes began to sting with unshed tears.

System 233 shattered the moment.

【Reject him. Host, in this world, the only person you can love is Xie Zhichi.】

【The cannon fodder gong in this world is meant to be devoted to one person, not someone who falls in love easily. Whatever the empress means, reject him.】

Lin Xiaoque parted his lips.

Yet no words came out.

233 urged him again and again.

Instead, Lin Xiaoque gently and carefully wiped away Chu Cizhao’s tears.

But just as hope began to bloom in Chu Cizhao’s eyes—

Lin Xiaoque destroyed it in the cruelest possible way.

“Your Majesty…”

“You should return.”

Your Majesty…

He still called him Your Majesty.

Chu Cizhao laughed.

A laugh full of mockery.

Of self-contempt.

As he laughed, he suddenly struck himself hard across the face.

Without another glance at Lin Xiaoque, he stood and walked away.

His first few steps were hurried and disordered.

Gradually, they became stiff.

Rigid.

Numb.

Once more, he became the empress.

Graceful.

Proper.

Beyond reproach.

After returning to his own palace, Chu Cizhao dismissed every servant.

The palace maid Wu Ying still wished to report something.

Chu Cizhao merely said coldly,

“Leave.”

There was a frightening ruthlessness in his voice.

Startled, Wu Ying hurried out without another word.

Alone, Chu Cizhao frantically tore off his phoenix crown.

Then his heavy ceremonial robes.

Piece by piece.

Until nothing remained on his body.

He collapsed onto the bed.

Tears streamed silently from the corners of his eyes.

He barely noticed.

All he could feel was the cold.

A cold so piercing it seemed ready to shatter his bones.

Only the desire buried deep within him burned unbearably—

Like red-hot iron.

The desire that had long been locked away.

Neither wholly male nor wholly female.

He wanted to hold Qie Yunu tightly.

Hold him so he could never escape.

Elsewhere.

Lin Xiaoque lay on his bed, staring blankly at the bed curtains overhead.

【I hurt him.】

That was all he said to 233.

Nothing followed.

After a moment of silence, 233 answered,

【You only forced the empress to face reality. Living in this world means being burdened with countless identities.】

【In this feudal society, as an object, he belongs to the emperor. He cannot cast aside the identity of ‘Empress.’ He has no authority of his own, no foundation of his own. Everything he possesses comes from the emperor.】

【If one day the emperor decided to depose him… or kill him… he would have no power to resist.】

【How can someone branded so deeply as another’s possession ever exist solely as himself?】

233 sighed.

【Oppression has always existed. Even in the world you came from… was there ever absolute justice?】

【The interests of those with power carry everyone else along. Those who disappear beneath history’s current aren’t even remembered as sacrifices.】

【They’re only cannon fodder. Stepping stones.】

【To others, the empress is a wife… a servant… but never simply Chu Cizhao.】

【As a child in his family’s inner quarters, he had to obey his father. He couldn’t refuse to attend the imperial banquet.】

【When Xiao Juan took a liking to him, he couldn’t refuse the marriage either. He could only gratefully accept it.】

【The imperial family demanded heirs, so he had to lie in bed and let Xiao Juan do as he pleased.】

【After giving birth, he had to devote himself to planning for his child’s future.】

【His family weighed upon his shoulders. The emperor’s authority demanded obedience. His child’s helplessness made him willingly kneel, becoming Xiao Juan’s possession… his wife… his servant.】

【Even when Xiao Juan humiliated him, he had to endure it.】

【Even when he didn’t want it… he could only submit.】

【This is a man’s world, Host. There is no place here where a ge’er can truly stand on his own.】

After listening quietly, Lin Xiaoque asked,

【Do you pity him?】

【No.】

233 answered honestly.

【I simply don’t want you to think I’m cruel… heartless… impossible to get along with.】

【Host, the only person I protect is you. No one else.】

【I’m telling you all this because I want you to understand that I’m not just a cold machine. I can have feelings too.】

【The reason I urged you to reject him is because I truly cannot accept it.】

【Whatever feelings the empress has, they would only bring you mortal danger.】

【If the emperor went mad and ordered you to be cut into a thousand pieces… you would have no choice but to die beneath those thousand cuts.】

【If this world’s consciousness discovered you’d broken character, it might force your soul out of this world. Your soul could be damaged beyond repair. You might even become an idiot.】

For the first time, 233 called him by his full name.

【Lin Xiaoque.】

【Your role in this world is small, and your character settings aren’t especially strict. As long as everyone believes you love Xie Zhichi, the world’s consciousness won’t care what you truly feel inside.】

【Even if countless people tell you they love you… as long as, on the surface, you love only Xie Zhichi, you’ll be safe.】

【Don’t accept anyone’s love… except Xie Zhichi’s.】

Inside the guest residence.

Yun Muhe’s wounds had already been treated.

But one of his leg bones had been broken.

A fracture like that required at least a hundred days to heal.

It would be more than three months before he could walk again.

After waking up and seeing the empress off, Lin Xiaoque sat in silence for a while before coming to visit Yun Muhe.

He was worried the physician hadn’t been properly cared for.

Yun Muhe still clutched Lin Xiaoque’s knife.

He had taken it from the heir during the chaos.

He wanted to return it properly.

His body was covered in scrapes.

His leg was broken.

Before Lin Xiaoque even reached the bedside, he noticed the cold sweat covering Yun Muhe’s forehead.

Seeing Lin Xiaoque arrive, Yun Muhe slowly raised the knife.

The blade pointed toward himself.

The hilt faced Lin Xiaoque.

“Heir…”

“Your knife.”

Lin Xiaoque looked at him.

He accepted the knife and gently set it aside.

Then he ordered the servants to bring hot water.

After wetting a cloth, he intended to wipe away Yun Muhe’s sweat himself.

He wanted everyone serving in the room to understand—

This was someone he valued.

Someone they must care for properly.

Yun Muhe stopped his hand.

“My lord…”

“I’m of lowly status.”

“You mustn’t.”

Even though pain tore through his body with every breath, Yun Muhe’s face remained calm.

The inferiority he had felt when first meeting Lin Xiaoque had long since shattered during their struggle for survival.

Looking at the young man before him—

A boy around Zhichi’s age—

He could no longer compare himself to him.

They belonged to entirely different worlds.

There was no point competing.

Lin Xiaoque didn’t insist.

Instead, he let one of the attendants wipe away the sweat.

But he disagreed with Yun Muhe’s words.

“In the face of life and death, there is no distinction between noble and lowly.”

“Kings and commoners alike are buried beneath the same earth.”

“We faced death together.”

“If we’d both ended up in the tiger’s jaws…”

“When the tiger digested us…”

“It wouldn’t care whether we were princes, nobles, or ministers.”

“We’d all become the same meal.”

After a pause, he smiled.

“We’ve talked so much.”

“But I still don’t know your name.”

Yun Muhe hesitated.

Then he lied.

“Mu Yun.”

“My name is Mu Yun.”

“I’m a household s*ave of the Prime Minister’s residence.”

Instinctively, he concealed his true identity.

“A household s*ave?”

Lin Xiaoque smiled.

“You won’t be anymore.”

Yun Muhe looked quietly at him.

If only the one who loved Zhichi had been Heir Lin…

Would everything have turned out differently?

He simply couldn’t imagine the honest, open-hearted youth before him ever hurting someone the way Xun Sui…

Or the emperor…

Would.

The light of the setting sun fell across Lin Xiaoque.

Golden.

Brilliant.

Bathed in its glow, Yun Muhe slowly lowered his eyes.

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