Chapter 35 Part 5: Connivance.

How much time had passed?

A week? No, perhaps even longer.

Just when I thought it might have been, I was strolling around, as usual, after class to enjoy the scenery.

Although I had already seen most of the buildings during the classes, how should I put it?

The scenery of the academy had a different charm that tickled my heart every time I saw it.

In the evening, the sunset was so beautiful that students would walk around to take pictures.

Of course, I’m not the type to enjoy taking pictures.

Anyway, I was wandering around, trying to find a good view.

And while I was absentmindedly organizing my thoughts, I felt someone approaching.

A vague vibration, as if something was urgent but also not.

It was clear that they had some business with me, but I couldn’t tell who it was, so I turned my head.

“It’s nice to see you, Yeji. It’s been a long time since we’ve talked like this.”

“Homeroom… Teacher?”

“Haha, you don’t have to be so distant. You can call me Hyorim-ssaem.”

“Ah, I see.”

“Do you know why I’m here, student?”

The homeroom teacher smiled.

It was the same benevolent smile as always, but for some reason.

I felt like she was trying to pry something out of me, and I unconsciously took a few steps back.

“Yeji, I’m not here to interrogate you.”

“…Then?”

“I’m here to ask you something.”

It sounded like it was a question now, but it would turn into an interrogation if the situation called for it.

So I tried to laugh it off, but the teacher really did just ask a question.

“How’s the night self-study going?”

“It’s the same as always. We keep training and conditioning.”

“Haha, it’s not too hard or anything?”

“It’s hard, but I can see my stamina increasing.”

“It’s good to see you enjoying it.”

“I’m not enjoying it.”

“Ah…”

“Honestly, there are times when I want to ditch it.”

“I see.”

The teacher, having said that, came right next to me.

And naturally, she asked another question.

“Are you satisfied with the special training?”

“I’m satisfied.”

“I thought the students would be struggling, rolling around on the ground every day… I’m glad you’re satisfied.”

“Regardless of how hard it is, the quality of the lessons is excellent. I have no choice but to endure it.”

“You say that, but it sounds like you have some feelings about it?”

“It must be your imagination.”

I said that, but it was true that I had feelings about it.

Regardless of how hard the teachers were trying, it was filthy hard.

There was a time when a student vomited, but they kept attacking, saying that villains wouldn’t care about that.

Of course, it wasn’t that everyone didn’t understand.

Everyone knew that if it were a real situation, they would have died.

Especially since there was another villain attack recently.

So I explained that even if I had feelings, I had to set them aside.

“It wasn’t bad. It made me realize my shortcomings day by day.”

“I see. Then…”

After hesitating for a moment, the homeroom teacher spoke as if she had made up her mind.

“How are your roommates?”

“Those three? They’re not bad. They’re all unique.”

“Unique… I see. Are there any other peculiarities?”

“I don’t think so. I think everyone is getting along… I’m not sure.”

“I see.”

“I think everyone has been working hard in class lately.”

The homeroom teacher seemed to want a different answer, but it was true.

I don’t know why, but everyone was training harder and harder.

When it was time to move, everyone would light up their eyes without saying anything.

“Oh, Yeji.”

“Yes.”

“How are your new friends?”

“You mean Yuyun and Dohwa? I’m still talking to them. And I’m still talking to Jinhoo…”

“I see. Are those friends working hard these days too?”

“Yes. Sometimes when we spar, they attack me like crazy.”

The expression ‘like crazy’ was an understatement.

Both Jin Yuyun and Choi Dohwa gritted their teeth and tried to knock me down.

It wasn’t just a simple sparring, and it was stopped more than once.

I heard their sincerity, saying that they had no choice but to become stronger, but it was still scary.

It was also strange to feel like I had become something like a final boss.

So, when I said this was my concern, the teacher threw a question as if she had been waiting for it.

“Is that the only thing you’re worried about, Yeji?”

“Yes. I don’t have any. I’m doing well in school too.”

“You don’t have any other worries or nightmares?”

“No. I rarely have nightmares. But why are you suddenly asking me that?”

“…So you’re saying you’ve never had a nightmare or anything like that?”

“…Teacher, please stop, it’s starting to get uncomfortable.”

I wondered where the promise not to interrogate me had gone.

Even if she was my homeroom teacher, I thought this kind of behavior was crossing the line.

Moreover, I hadn’t done anything wrong, so I was about to be a little forceful.

“After that incident, all five students except Yeji received counseling… Only you are okay?”

“…Ah.”

“Student, are you really okay? Are you saying you’re okay even after going through that, not just pretending to be okay?”

“…I’m, okay.”

“I’m asking if you’re really okay, Yeji.”

“I said I’m okay, didn’t I?”

I said that and drew a line.

The anxiety I had suppressed with medication was momentarily resurfacing.

The atmosphere, which had been friendly until a moment ago, was gone, and the question had become an interrogation.

The teacher kept staring at me.

It was as if she wanted me to say something, but I didn’t.

No, I didn’t want to.

“I’m okay.”

I smiled as I said that.

I’m fine. It was a magic word.

Whatever happened to me, it didn’t really matter.

Because no matter how much I said I was struggling, there was nothing I could do to dramatically improve the situation.

So I have no choice but to keep shouting that I’m struggling, but then another problem arises.

People would point fingers at me, saying.

‘You’re not the only one struggling. We’re struggling too.’

‘How long do we have to listen to your whining?’

“I said, I’m okay.”

So I had no choice but to say I was okay.

No matter how much comfort I received, the situation wouldn’t change.

Even if I said I was afraid of needles and scared of experiments, no one would care.

Rather, they would bully me more for being noisy, and no one would listen to my voice.

Yes, well. In a way, it was natural.

The heroes on TV couldn’t hear my voice.

They didn’t know that there was a place in the basement of Korea where children were kidnapped and experimented on.

“I said I’m okay…?”

That’s why I had no choice but to keep saying I was okay.

Because comfort is not practical help.

Because the world is full of people who want to make those who are suffering suffer more.

…Because in order to become a hero for people like me, I can’t have any disqualifications.

I already know it’s a lie, but what can I do?

So, as if covering the sky with my palm, I exhaled again.

“I said I’m okay, Teacher. What’s the problem?”

“Student…”

“Or is your definition of ‘okay’ different from the ‘okay’ I know?”

“No, it’s the same.”

“Then you understand what I’m saying. I’m, okay.”

I said that and smiled, but it was my limit.

I wondered when the effect of the medicine had worn off.

It was getting harder and harder to suppress my emotions.

If I were to pinpoint the cause, it would be a mistake to get used to the sensation of the drug suppressing my nerves.

It was… like having a mouthful of sauce and insisting I didn’t eat it.

But I had no choice.

I was already used to swallowing despair and pain alone.

This too would pass, and I just had to smile as if nothing had happened.

So, I hoped that my homeroom teacher would let it go, and I heard the answer I was waiting for.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“…Yes, Teacher.”

“Student, if I remember correctly, Yeji, you’re taking medication personally. Is that correct?”

“…Yes, I’ve been taking it.”

“Can I assume that’s why you didn’t need counseling?”

I nodded instead of answering.

I don’t know if it was a satisfactory answer, but my homeroom teacher turned and left as soon as she heard my answer.

As if saying, I don’t know if it’s true or not, but I’ll believe you this time.

After that, a day or two passed.

Luckily, I wasn’t called in for what happened before, and I lived a normal life.

Going to class. Admiring the scenery during breaks. Sometimes eating lunch together or going to the snack bar.

I was enjoying my youth in my own way when it was time for special training.

“I’m so glad, so glad! After all this time… I’m so glad!”

I saw the vice-principal standing there with a familiar voice.

“You still can’t deal with illusion magic! I’m so glad!”

I opened my mouth blankly and then closed it.

I was flustered by the unexpected situation.

“The special training starts now!”

As the vice-principal said, the special training began.