Chapter 4: Awakening to Reality

When I came to my senses, it was already evening.

I dragged my aching body and slumped down on the edge of a field next to the manor’s wheat field.

Not far ahead, the serfs bent over like snails, using cracked sickles to harvest in the rice fields.

I simply stared at them, my mind drifting back to when I first arrived in this world.

Back then, I didn’t know the language of this world, so I was forced to perform grueling physical labor with these serfs.

Those were days of despair, where I had to endure inhuman labor just to earn a meager ration of food.

Through my interactions with these serfs, I gradually learned the language of this world.

Then, I started as a male servant under the lord and slowly climbed to the position of chief steward.

I had thought that I had achieved social mobility, rising from a peasant to the middle class, and could now feel proud and carefree.

But reality slapped me hard.

There was no such thing as upward mobility…

I was still a lowly servant, insignificant and powerless.

The cruelty of this world far surpassed that of the modern era. If one cannot become a powerful figure at the dining table, they are merely a piece of meat on the menu.

And now, I was incapable of doing anything.

“Bena, Mia, Aisha…”

I had informed all three of them, but I still couldn’t decide whether to tell Lulona.

I kept telling myself that perhaps this was a good thing, especially for Lulona, a girl of humble birth.

After all, anyone who marries the young lady must be a remarkable person. A ordinary girl like Lulona would never have the chance to meet such a person in her lifetime.

If she could gain even a little favor from her future husband, perhaps she would be able to live comfortably for the rest of her life.

Weren’t her parents the ones who sold her here because they couldn’t feed her?

Compared to being a maid, perhaps marrying a nobleman would be a better choice for her.

Was this her fate?

As I hesitated, a sudden cool sensation crept up my neck.

I turned my head in confusion and saw a pair of clear, brown eyes.

“Lulona… what are you doing here?”

“The kitchen work is almost done, so I came out…”

While speaking, Lulona applied something to the back of my neck.

It was a green paste, apparently made from crushed plants.

Noticing my confusion, Lulona explained, “It’s a herbal remedy.”

“Herbal remedy?”

“It helps with inflammation and pain.”

“How did you know I was injured?”

“In the afternoon, I heard Bena say you left with injuries. I figured you must have been beaten by the mistress, so I brought the remedy to check on you.”

Lulona gently applied the remedy to my wound. Her hands were small and delicate, like tender willow branches, carrying a cool breeze that soothed my injury.

I couldn’t tell if it was the remedy’s effectiveness or her touch that had a magical effect, but the pain seemed to lessen.

“We maids often get beaten by the mistress. She has a terrible temper.”

Mumbling a complaint about the crazy woman, Lulona packed the remaining remedy into a small cloth bag and handed it to me.

“Here, take the rest of the remedy. If it hurts at night, you can apply more.”

I took the bag, looking at her and her calloused hands, feeling a pang of sorrow.

“Who… who taught you to do this? I mean, to make the remedy.”

At my question, Lulona’s lips curled into a sweet smile.

“Oh, my father taught me. When I was little and often got hurt, he showed me how to make it.”

Her clear eyes narrowed slightly, as if lost in memories.

“My father…”

I suddenly remembered a man I had seen a few years ago—a farmer with sun-baked skin, short and thin.

It was he who sold Lulona here.

Strangely, despite being sold by her father, Lulona spoke of him with such joy.

“Don’t you… hate him?”

“Who?”

“Your father. Didn’t he sell you here?”

Hearing this, Lulona’s face slowly formed a smile that seemed beyond her years.

Her eyelids lowered slightly, her lips curling up and then relaxing.

“Hate? Well, maybe a little at first, but not anymore.”

“I don’t understand. Why?”

Lulona’s expression turned somber, and her voice deepened.

“About three years ago, our village had been experiencing poor harvests for three years. My grandmother starved to death because we couldn’t afford food. On her deathbed, she made us promise to protect the family’s land.

But soon after, my younger brother fell ill from hunger and couldn’t get out of bed. He lay there every day, too weak to move.

Not long after, my father sold the land, but all he got was a few sacks of wheat, which wouldn’t last long.

He had done everything he could, but it still wasn’t enough to feed our family.

Our food was running out, and it was a matter of who would starve to death first—me, my brother, or my mother…

One night, I saw my mother trying to hang herself. I cried out, and thankfully, my father stopped her.

My father called my mother a fool, and she, with no tears left, kept saying she was sorry, believing that if she had died earlier, perhaps my grandmother wouldn’t have starved, and my brother wouldn’t have fallen ill…

Then, someone from the village told him that the lord in the west was buying people.

What choice did he have as a father? Sell his wife? Or his children?

He had no choice. He truly had no choice.”

By this point, Lulona’s smile had vanished, and tears streamed down her gaunt face, falling to the ground like shattered glass.

“So, how could I hate him?”

My heart felt shattered, and my body trembled.

This was the first time I understood Lulona’s background and the thoughts in her heart.

I had always assumed she must hate her father for selling her for twenty loaves of bread.

But now, knowing the full story, I wondered if I, as a father, could have done better?

“But why you?”

I found myself asking.

If her brother had been sold, perhaps she could still be with her parents now.

“Because I’m the older sister,”

Lulona’s gaze held a power that pierced my soul,

“A sister must protect her younger brother.”

In that moment, I felt my pride as an adult shattered completely.

I realized I had never had such a resolve—to sacrifice for others.

Before this child, I could only look up.

And then, Lulona did something I couldn’t comprehend.

She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her small head in my chest.

“Lulona…”

“Steward, is this work time?”

I didn’t understand her question, but quickly replied, “No, work time has ended today.”

The pressure around my waist seemed to tighten, and I felt like I was being hugged by a sloth.

“Then let me hug you a little longer,” she said.

“Why?” I asked.

Her small head peeked out from my chest, her bright eyes looking up at me, her cheeks slightly flushed.

“Your scent… it’s comforting.”

For a moment, I felt like I was truly seeing my own daughter.