Chapter 4: Seeds of Affection

I stayed with Taewoon at his house, waiting for the day Dr. Yoon would return.
Taewoon and I spent our time alone at home, without going out.

His house had many spaces for activities, like a screening room for movies and dramas, a swimming pool, and a fitness room.
But since the house still felt unfamiliar, I mostly spent my time watching TV in the living room.

Taewoon would watch TV with me, but he also occasionally went out when called by the Association.
Only when he left could I finally breathe.
He was kind to me, but like his house, he still wasn’t completely comfortable to be around.
And I kept finding myself being overly cautious.
I wasn’t naturally an outgoing person, but in front of Taewoon, I felt particularly withdrawn.

Perhaps he sensed this, as today he suggested we go out together.

“Shinui-ssi, it’s a bit stuffy in here, shall we go out for a bit?”

“Is it okay to go out?”

“Of course. Is there anywhere you’d like to go?”

“I… um.”

Taewoon waited for me to speak, but I couldn’t think of anywhere.
I had only ever shuttled between the factory and my dorm, so I had no idea where people usually went for fun.
I felt foolish for not being able to name a single place I wanted to go.

“I just… want to get some fresh air.”

“Then shall we go to a place I frequent?”

“Where do you go often?”

“It’s a secret until we get there.”

I was curious, but at his word that it was a secret, I decided to wait until we arrived.
And so, after we started living together, Taewoon and I went out together for the first time.

“It will take about 40 minutes.”

Watching him turn the steering wheel, I said it was fine.
With that, Taewoon skillfully drove the car out of the underground parking lot.

“Shinui-ssi, do you like driving?”

“I think I do.”

It was my first time going for a drive like this, but speeding down the road in his sports car made my heavy heart feel much lighter.

“Then let’s go for drives often. How about a drive at dawn next time?”

I nodded, imagining a dawn drive with him on an empty road.
The image was clearer than reality, and my heart swelled with anticipation.

“Shinui-ssi, you said you were curious about where we’re going, right?”

“Yes. I’m curious since you said it’s a place you go to often.”

“We’re going to my family home.”

“Your, your family home?”

The words “family home” made my body tense up automatically.
The thought of having to meet his parents filled me with worry.

“Shinui-ssi, your face has hardened. Are you okay? We won’t be meeting anyone. We’re just going near the family home.”

“Ah… near the family home.”

I turned my head towards the window and let out a sigh of relief.
Watching me, Taewoon let out a small laugh.

The place we arrived at was a mansion halfway up a mountain.
I was captivated by the elegant and classic exterior, something you would only see in foreign films, and stared at the mansion for a while.
Then, noticing Taewoon waiting for me, I followed his lead and walked behind the mansion.

The place we arrived at had a large glass greenhouse.

“It’s a greenhouse?”

“Yes. I inherited it from my mother.”

“Then was that mansion the family home?”

Taewoon smiled and nodded.
I had a feeling, and it turned out to be true.
I turned my head towards the mansion and asked.

“Then should we go and say a quick hello to your mother?”

“We can’t. Both my parents were Awakened, and they died in the line of duty at a gate.”

“…Ah, I shouldn’t have brought up your mother…”

I wasn’t good at consoling people and lacked eloquence, so I didn’t know what to say.
If Taewoon weren’t in front of me, I would have wanted to tear my hair out.
Unlike me, who couldn’t string my words together properly, Taewoon opened the greenhouse door as if it were no big deal.

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago. Let’s stop the gloomy talk and go inside.”

In the end, I couldn’t respond properly to his words and followed him into the greenhouse.

The inside of the greenhouse was like a tropical rainforest, filled with trees and plants whose names I didn’t know.
I thought it was large from the outside, but stepping inside, I could truly grasp its scale.

Taewoon and I strolled slowly through the greenhouse.
There was even a pond in the center where koi fish moved freely.
Watching the yellow and orange-hued koi play, I asked him.

“By any chance, do you have daffodils?”

“Yes. You must like daffodils?”

“My mother passed away last year. She loved daffodils when she was alive, so I wanted to see them.”

“Your mother also passed away early, Shinui-ssi. My mother loved daffodils too.”

To think his mother also loved daffodils.
If both of our mothers were alive, they might have formed a good relationship, just like Taewoon and I have now.

The place Taewoon guided me to had clusters of pale yellow daffodils blooming.
As I knelt and gazed at the star-shaped petals, a sense of peace washed over me.

“Looking at the flowers makes me feel calm.”

“Me too.”

Taewoon said, bending down beside me.
His face was so close that I averted my eyes without realizing it.

“You must have been very lonely after your mother passed away, Shinui-ssi.”

“…Yes.”

“I’ll be by your side from now on, so you won’t be lonely anymore.”

I had always thought I was alone after my mother died, but his gentle words made me want to lean on him more and more.

“I’ll stay by your side too, Taewoon-ssi.”

Taewoon and I exchanged a few words as we walked around the greenhouse.
Given the location, we also talked about plants.

“I have some potted plants I was raising at my dorm.”

The plants at my dorm had been on my mind, but since I couldn’t leave freely, I hadn’t been able to bring them over easily.
Besides, he might not like it, and I didn’t want to trouble him by asking him to go all the way to my dorm with me.
But they would be in danger if I didn’t water them anymore, so I carefully brought it up.

“…Is it okay if I bring them home?”

“Of course. You can bring them over tomorrow.”

“Really? Is that okay?”

“Of course.”

They were precious plants that my late mother had raised.
After she passed, I had been taking care of them, using all the experience I had gained from raising plants with her.
I was relieved that Taewoon readily agreed to let me bring them into the house.

The day after we visited the greenhouse, Taewoon, as if to keep his promise, immediately brought the potted plants from my dorm.
Along with a new pot.

“It’s a gift.”

“What is this?”

Inside the paper bag that smelled distinctly of soil was a small pot.
Planted in the pot was an object that looked like an onion, and it felt as if it were looking up at me.

“It’s a daffodil bulb. They say it will sprout in about a month.”

“Are you giving this to me?”

“Yes. I thought you liked daffodils too.”

Thinking of him buying the bulb for me brought a smile to my face and a feeling of warmth spread through my heart.

“I do. Thank you, Taewoon-ssi.”

Someday, when a flower bloomed from that small bulb, it would be nice to visit our families’ graves with him, holding the flower.

“Take good care of it.”

“Yes. I’ll try my best to raise it well.”

A few days later, Taewoon even built a small greenhouse on the terrace for me, since I liked plants.
As my own space and things began to fill the house that once only held his belongings, I felt myself gradually blending into his life and this home.

I couldn’t take my eyes off Taewoon.
My gaze followed him whenever he moved, and I found myself observing his every action.

According to the Esper & Guide booklet he gave me, Espers and Guides with high matching rates are drawn to each other, and their feelings of affection grow the more they guide.
That’s why it’s common for Espers and Guides with high matching rates or who become exclusive partners to become lovers.
As he had said, maybe we could become lovers too.

I tried to imagine the moment we became lovers, but the very thought of someone like me dating an S-Class like him felt shameless.
The question, ‘Am I, who has nothing to be proud of, worthy of being his partner?’ just kept repeating in my mind.

“What are you thinking so hard about?”

Taewoon, who had approached me at some point, asked as he stroked my hair.

“You’ve had a bad expression on your face for a while now.”

It seemed my inner worries had shown on my face.
I smoothed out my frown and looked at him.

“…Is it okay for me to be by your side?”

“Was that why you had that expression on your face?”

I nodded without a word.
He gently rubbed the space between my eyebrows with his thumb and spoke.

“What should I say to put you at ease, Shinui-ssi?”

“……”

“Top-tier Espers have to focus all their attention on killing the boss monster when a gate opens. The day I first saw you, I was also focused only on the boss. But the moment I saw you, I couldn’t take my eyes off you. And when I came to my senses, I was helping you.”

I had actually been wondering why he had helped me.
And his words finally gave me the reason.

“The moment I touched you, I felt that the sensation of guiding was different from usual. The guiding that had always felt forced, as if it didn’t quite fit, connected instantly, as if it had found its match.”

“…I was also amazed because I felt a connection the moment I touched you.”

“Me too. It’s the first time I’ve ever been so interested in someone.”

“……”

“I think I fell for you at first sight, Shinui-ssi.”

Surprised by his sudden confession, I involuntarily averted my gaze from his.
I just couldn’t look him in the eye.
Blood rushed to my face in an instant, and my head drooped.

“I imagine you must be flustered by all these sudden events. But what’s certain is that I need you, Shinui-ssi. There’s no one more important to me than you now.”

His words made my earlier anxiety fade.
As he said, I had become an important existence to him.
Only a Guide with a high matching rate could rapidly raise an Esper’s stats in a short period and prevent the rampages that were directly linked to their lives.

“I’ll wait until your heart opens up, Shinui-ssi.”

As he gently took my hand, a wavelength containing both sharpness and gentleness enveloped me.
It was as if he was telling me to trust him.

The gentle current also put my mind at ease.
I no longer wanted to tremble in anxiety but wanted to trust him and stay by his side.