Chapter 82: A Mother’s Grave

My mother’s death anniversary had returned.
Since I still couldn’t move around alone, I had lunch and then headed to the park cemetery with Jinseok.

Before going to see my mother, I picked up the bouquet I had reserved.
In the old days, because my finances were not good, I would just bring a few simple flowers, but now, it was a lush bouquet with a variety of colorful flowers.

I should have given it to her when she was alive…
It was a shame that I couldn’t.

After parking the car in the parking lot, I headed to my mother’s grave with the bouquet.
Jinseok accompanied me all the way to the front of the grave.

Perhaps because it was a weekday, we were the only ones who had visited the cemetery.

As soon as I arrived at my mother’s grave, I placed the bouquet on the grave stone.
But there was already a flower offering, as if someone had come and gone.
It was a daffodil.

There was no one else who would come, so it seemed someone had placed the flower on the wrong grave.
I thought I would have to ask the manager on my way back.

Perhaps because it had been a long time since I had seen my mother, my heart felt wistful.
As always, I didn’t want my mother to worry, so I told her I was doing well.
Jinseok also stood next to me, bowed his head in a moment of silence, and greeted her.

I wish I could have gone back to before my mother passed away…
Then, instead of talking to myself like this, I would have had a conversation with her and cherished her even more.

Barely holding back my tears, I tidied up the area around the grave and stood up.

“I’ll come again on your birthday, Mom.”

I bowed twice, stood up, and moved to the parking lot.
The manager’s office was in the parking lot, and just then, I approached the manager who was cleaning outside and asked.

“I think someone placed a flower on our grave by mistake.”

“What’s the number?”

When I told him the grave number, the manager went into the office, checked, and then said.

“No. Someone offers flowers every month.”

“Every month?”

“Yes. They came this morning too. A handsome, tall man.”

At the manager’s words, my eyes narrowed on their own.

“If he comes again next time, can you ask him to leave a phone number?”

“Yes.”

The manager’s words weighed on my mind, and I walked back to my mother’s grave.
When I touched the flower, I could feel his very faint wavelength.

Come to think of it, in the past, he had asked me what I was doing as I was tending to the daffodils that had bloomed from the bulb before I went to my mother’s grave.

At that time, at my words that I was going to my mother’s grave, he had taken me to her grave just once.

Why would he come to my mother’s grave?
I was angry at his lingering attachment.
Even though I wouldn’t acknowledge it.

Even if I did, there was no way I would forgive his past actions for this.
I still regretted meeting him.

If it were up to me, I would have wanted to throw away the bouquet Taewoon had brought, but since it was a bouquet for my mother, not me, I couldn’t touch it.

To be honest, I sometimes felt depressed because I felt like I was the only one who remembered my mother, but finding out that he was visiting her like this made my heart feel strange.
I was going to tell him not to come to my mother’s grave, but I wanted to let it slide just for today.

On the way home, my first meeting with him came to mind.
To be honest, that moment came to mind every time I visited my mother’s grave.
It seemed to be because I had met him on my way back from seeing my mother.
I tried not to think about it.
But for some reason, his gentle appearance came to mind today.
That dream-like month with him.
The me of that time was truly happy.

We would fall asleep while guiding in the same bed, and in the morning, we would wake up together and have breakfast.

We raised flowers together in the greenhouse, and he also learned how to raise flowers by my side and we managed them together.

During the month I spent with him, he was never not gentle.
He seemed to love me, and I also liked him a lot.

But when my grade came out, his attitude changed unbelievably.
I even doubted if he was the same person.

It was really hard at first, but as the time I spent with him grew longer, I had endured for three years because of his caring and considerate side.
Though it was all in vain…

Thinking of myself, who had died coldly to save him, made me feel so pitiful.
The more I thought about it, the more I hated him.

As I was recalling my past with him, I was reminded of my mother’s plants that I had left behind in the dorm.
I had forgotten about them because of the continuous incidents.

“Manager-nim, can we go to the factory I used to work at?”

“Why is that?”

“Because there’s something I left behind.”

Fortunately, I was able to go to the factory with the manager.
The factory was just as I remembered it.
I sincerely hoped that my dorm hadn’t been cleared out.

As soon as I arrived at the dorm, I went up to the second floor where I had lived.
The door wouldn’t open even when I pressed the door lock, so it seemed someone had moved in.

In the end, I had no choice but to go and see Foreman Kim.
The foreman, whom I had met after a long time, greeted me more warmly than ever.

“Shinui-ssi, I missed you a lot.”

He, who had always used informal speech, had now switched to formal speech.
Feeling that I could no longer be with him as before, a bitter smile formed on my lips, but I quickly hid my expression and greeted him warmly.

“I’m sorry for visiting so late.”

“Not at all. What brings you here?”

“There were some flower pots in the dorm I used to use.”

“Ah…. Those flower pots have been disposed of.”

Even though I didn’t have high hopes, I had still wondered…
Hearing that they had really been disposed of made me lose my energy.

“I see…”

I couldn’t help but feel a sense of disappointment.
They were the flower pots my mother had tended to, and I had also cherished them.

“Were they flower pots you cherished a lot?”

“…Yes.”

At my words, the foreman made an excuse, saying he had contacted the Association before disposing of the things, but since they had already been disposed of, it was no comfort.

After that, I exchanged a few words with the foreman and then came out and met the factory people after a long time.
There weren’t many people I was close with, but it was nice to see them after a long time.
And so I said my goodbyes to everyone and returned home.
I still didn’t feel good, but even if I had found the flower pots, the plants would have been withered, so I tried to comfort myself.

And I realized once again that the dead do not come back.
My feelings for him as well.

Not long after I arrived home, my phone started to ring.
When I looked at my phone screen, I saw that a call was coming from Rainer.
He would contact me from time to time, but it had been a long time since he had called like this.

“Hello?”

A bright voice came out of me with a happy heart.

• [Shinui, have you been well?]

His voice was also excited, just like mine.
His voice was always so cheerful that it made me feel better just hearing it.

“I’m always the same. Guiding training, and then going out when a gate appears.”

• [I see. I’m going to go to Korea to see you this time.]

“To Korea?”

I was surprised to hear that he was coming to Korea, but the happiness was greater.

• [Yes. I got a long vacation this time. I can finally see you.]

Since I had been waiting for him to come to Korea, it was very welcome news to me.

“When you come to Korea, I’ll take you to many good places.”

• [I’ll remember that. But Shinui, you still don’t have any intention of coming to our side?]

Since he and I had a high matching rate, he would always make a scout offer like this whenever he contacted me, but I still had no intention of going to an overseas association.

“I’m sorry. I still like Korea.”

• [Everyone is waiting for you.]

I knew that the American people liked me.
After all, when the magazine came out, it had even sold out in the US.

“Thank you for thinking well of me.”

• [I’ll keep waiting, so if you ever want to come, just let me know anytime.]

“Okay.”

• [Can I stay at your house when I go to Korea this time?]

“It will be smaller than the mansion you lived in, but will that be okay?”

• [Of course it’s okay. I’m curious about where you live.]

“Do as you please. You have to be sure to contact me when you come to Korea.”

He would probably find our house stuffy and go straight to a hotel.

• [Okay. Stay healthy until then.]

And so the call with him ended.

For him to come to Korea.
Certainly, if he came, this boring life would become a little more lively.

I also wanted to introduce him to Wonjae and Jihwon.
It seemed their personalities would match well.

I hadn’t been in a good mood until I came home, but the call with him had definitely lifted my spirits.
Come to think of it, I was in a good mood as long as I didn’t think about him.

Feeling once again that Hyun Taewoon was an unnecessary existence in my life, I thought I had to take measures to prevent him from coming any closer.