Chapter 7: The Most Persistence Kind of Madman

“Do it properly? What do you mean by— Augh!”

It was a mistake. I had let a single thread of my focus slip to Sephiroth’s weird nonsense, and the price was painful. The axe flying toward my head cleanly shredded my HP in an instant.

My vision was stained in grayscale. A notification window dangled before my eyes.

[You have died. Would you like to resurrect?]

Resurrection Penalty: None

There was no penalty, but I couldn’t bring myself to press the button immediately. Sephiroth was crouching in front of my sprawled corpse, staring at me. This eerie murderer, who didn’t even bother to put his axe down, was poking my corpse with his fingertip.

No, what on earth is this…?

“Are you crazy?”

“Resurrect already.”

“You’re just going to kill me again if I do, aren’t you?”

“That sounds about right.”

I was speechless. He was spouting psychopathic lines in a voice that was way too melodious. How could I resurrect with a guy like that camping my body? Just as I was debating whether to log out right then and there…

Sephiroth pulled a glowing purple scroll from his inventory. Then, with a rip, he tore it over my corpse.

[Sephiroth has resurrected you.]

“You crazy bastard!”

There truly are diverse types of crazy in this world. The sheer dedication to using a Resurrection Scroll just to kill me multiple times was impressive. I stood there, stunned and speechless, as Sephiroth lifted his axe and tilted his head at an angle.

“What are you doing?”

What am I doing? I’m cursing you out in my head.

“Get into a stance. Here I come.”

“Crazy f*ck….”

He was a lunatic who even gave me a head start by announcing his attack. I thought he was a kind AI, but to think there was such a twist. No, wait, wasn’t he clearly helping me back in the village? Did I commit some heinous crime deserving of being torn limb from limb while we were walking out?

Dumbfounded, I just stood there. I took the axe hit directly and became a corpse once more. I could only let out a hollow laugh at this absurd situation that surpassed even anger, but Sephiroth sighed and started rummaging for another Resurrection Scroll.

He was a truly fresh kind of crazy.

By the time Sephiroth pulled out his fifth Resurrection Scroll, my patience had reached its limit. At this rate, this game was going to be “Skull-Crushing Simulator starring Sephiroth’s Axe.” Just as I was looking for the Force Quit button, Sephiroth’s attacks stopped.

“Running away?”

Wait, do you really think saying that is going to ignite some competitive spirit in me?

The black armor tilted its head. Watching the pitch-black metal glint, I became certain: this guy is definitely a kid. There’s no way an adult would act like this.

But man, is it irritating….

“Is it the culture here to bully a newbie who just finished the tutorial? Running away? No, I’m quitting! I’m quitting the game!”

“What are you talking about? You have to fight me properly.”

What are you talking about?

“Why would I suddenly fight you?”

“Because I want to fight you.”

“Interactions between people usually happen after a mutual agreement, you know?”

“There’s no such thing in PVP.”

One-on-one battles where you aim for each other’s heads often happen without agreement. In fact, many games have specific “PK Zones” where players can kill each other.

It seemed this trash game had PK Zones that started right from the newbie village.

Of course, many users enjoy PVP. But a normal player-versus-player fight doesn’t have such a massive level gap. A guy at max level with a full set of gear fighting me, who just created an account today? And this guy is a ranker whose name even I recognize?

“You’re max level and I barely escaped Level 1. Is this PVP? You’re just murdering me.”

Sun-class friends, do you understand what I’m saying? I tried to soothe Sephiroth as if I were dealing with a kindergarten child. For whatever reason, this madman wanted to fight me properly. That ranker Han Kyutae talks about every single day—targeting a newbie who just started today!

To my protest, Sephiroth began speaking in riddles.

“Do you know that in Zelpia, the Agility stat is absolutely fixed? You can’t raise it with items or level-ups.”

“So?”

“It means that if a beginner has good controls, they can realistically kill a ranker.”

Ah, so you’re telling me to become a spoon-murderer?

“Listen, buddy. Agility might be fixed, but there’s a huge difference in Attack and Defense, right? Since those can be increased or decreased by levels and items.”

“True.”

“If I get hit once by your attack, I die. If you get hit a hundred times by mine, you won’t. Is that fair?”

“Hmm.”

At my point, Sephiroth stroked his chin once and nodded.

“That’s true.”

Fortunately, he had at least the bare minimum of common sense. Veteran players shouldn’t bully newbies. I muttered public service announcement slogans to myself while flashing him a bright smile. Let’s part ways now, you crazy bastard.

Before my mental farewell could finish, that melodious voice spoke again.

“Then level up quickly.”

I take it back.

Before I could even be shocked, the man without a shred of common sense sent me a trade request. Apparently, you can receive trade requests even as a corpse. I was too stunned for words. Curious to see what he’d do, I hit accept, and items immediately began filling the trade slots.

Elixir of Hangston. Baalita’s Special Concentrated Solution. Handmade Cake Infused with Zeren’s Soul….

The items, which had suspicious names, were surrounded by rainbow-colored borders. They were items that screamed “I am rare” just by looking at them.

“What is all this?”

“Take those and grind the fields. You need to level up.”

The madman spoke as if he were asking why I’d state something so obvious. When I canceled the trade out of absurdity, the request came right back. Just as he had relentlessly torn Resurrection Scrolls to revive my dead self, the lunatic repeated his crazy behavior without getting bored.

“……Why are you doing this to me?”

I muttered in disbelief, and the answer came immediately.

“Because you beat me.”

Excuse me, I never beat you. I beat a 5th-floor NPC.

He had even used an emote, as a blushing effect appeared over the black helmet. I never wanted to see a blushing black-clad knight in my life, but I’m really experiencing all sorts of things today. By this point, I was too tired to argue point by point.

“I’m done with the game for today.”

“Is that so? Just take the items and get lost.”

Persistent bastard….

In the end, I accepted the trade, and the rainbow-colored items rolled into my inventory. The madman spoke in a refreshed voice. His tone was so sweet it could be misunderstood by anyone else.

“Level up well.”

“……I’m quitting the game.”

“Don’t say such disappointing things.”

“I think your personality was the most disappointing thing here.”

Sephiroth chuckled at my defiance. His voice was frustratingly good, and that low laughter sounded incredibly pleasant. It was the first time since Na Eun-hyeok that a voice had pulled at my heartstrings. Of course, he was a madman with a personality so bad it was an insult to compare him to Na Eun-hyeok.

“Make sure to take those elixirs. They’ll help.”

“I said I’m quitting.”

“If I send a friend request, will you accept?”

“No.”

Speak sense. Who gave you permission to defile my precious friend list?

Sephiroth didn’t seem to expect me to accept anyway, as he cleanly turned his back. He walked away with a refreshing farewell, like a cowboy saying “Adios” in a Western movie. Of course, only Sephiroth was refreshed. I was not.

I let out a long sigh as I stepped out of the capsule. Dealing with that lunatic for a few minutes was more exhausting than climbing the Tutorial Tower for thirty.

This game…. Should I just quit…?

[Friend] JustOneHitOppa: HOLY SH*T CHAE EONHA WERE YOU WITH SEPHIROTH???;;;;;;;;;;

[Friend] PoongPoongieLove: Eonha, did you die to Sephiroth?

[Friend] JustOneHitOppa: F*ck, I don’t know. I got hit while trying to find Chae Eonha… Died instantly. Resurrect me please.

[Friend] PoongPoongieLove: Do it yourself. I’m going to save Eonha.

[Friend] PoongPoongieLove: Wait, why is Sephiroth still here;

[Friend] JustOneHitOppa: Ah, Chae Eonha logged out;;;;;;;; Why did I die f*ck.

<Did you see the Miracle of Moses yesterday?> Newbies and veterans alike running away together… It was a majestic sight… Sephiroth is a god… └ Why do you sound like such a loser └ I was there at the scene of history lol └ Did BlueberryWhiskey escape? He looked dazed. └ The rookie who appeared after 3 years vs. the ranker of 3 years. └ He said he’s going to crush the rookie, please delete this post.

“I went to find you and died to Sephiroth, buddy.”

Han Kyutae, who rushed to my seat before the lecture even started, waved his phone. I snatched the phone that looked like it was about to fly away and saw a post about Sephiroth’s antics yesterday. Summarizing the posts, it was all about how the “Advent of Sephiroth” caused a mass exodus.

I see. No wonder the village got quiet. Everyone had ditched me and bolted.

I never expected loyalty, but these people didn’t have a lick of it. If you’re going to treat me like a monkey in a zoo, shouldn’t you at least leave the cage door open? Of course, I didn’t see the Shouts or the chat, but still…….