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Chapter 88: Under the Radiance, a Fractured Rhythm

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thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
1 month ago

I’m not sure if the entire writing style of the novel did actually changed or if this was run through AI or what happened but this is almost completely unreadable. The last several chapters read like a robot pretending to be human. “The localized preview display was structurally limited, truncating the remainder of the message data. ” is a bizarre stilted way to say the message was cut off. “it was infinitely more statistically probable that he was simply navigating a subpar physical condition today” instead of something like “it was more likely he wasn’t feeling well”. Or “Gyu-tae’s localized behavioral parameters were radiating a profoundly bizarre reading”… what even is a “localized behavioral parameter”

Last edited 1 month ago by thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
Reply to  aaron
1 month ago

I would say 85 on would be worth reviewing. There definitely was a trend prior to that towards more flowery/over-the-top language choice but it’s not so much that it’s unreadable and it can fall under a stylistic decision. Myself, I’m not a fan of it since it comes across like a 13 year old with a thesaurus wrote it but it is more in the realm of personal preference than not.

I think using the frequency of the word parameter is probably a good measure. Parameter is something you aren’t going to see regularly used in fiction writing outside of technical contexts such as IT/computers or scientific research. It can make sense that it would show up here or there in referring to aspects of game mechanics but it sticks out when it is used outside of that context.

thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
Reply to  aaron
1 month ago

Chapter 89 read well but it went back to robot-speak in 90 with sentences like “At the sound of Na Eun-hyeok’s voice payload, I noticed the surrounding civilian nodes pivoting their head arrays toward us”

thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
Reply to  aaron
1 month ago

I haven’t gotten that far. I gave up at 95 because it was hard to follow the story the way it was written. But if the chapter titles are any indication they probably have similar issues.

thwopthwopthot
thwopthwopthot
Reply to  aaron
1 month ago

It looks like it has been corrected up to 100 now. 101 went back to the weird robot speak.

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