Chapter 40: The Secret Life of a Water Deer Supplier

With a thunderous roar, Sephiroth lunged forward like a bullet. As I stared blankly at his retreating back, the frantic cries of water deer began to erupt from that direction.

AAACK! AAAAACK!

Screaming like someone being murdered, two water deer leaped nimbly from the thicket. Their yellow fur shimmered with a healthy luster, as if they had been raised on only the finest feed. I’d heard that herbivores were timid, but the water deer in Zelpia must have been programmed for combat; they didn’t hesitate for a second, charging straight for the garden despite seeing Sephiroth brandishing his trowel.

Whoa, they’re fast!

But Sephiroth was faster. He intercepted the deer charging toward his crops with a speed that made his heavy iron armor look as light as a feather. The black eyes of the water deer glinted as they tried to weave past him toward the herbs. One deer, baring large fangs, stomped its hooves aggressively.

“Let’s settle this today, you vermin.”

Sephiroth swung his trowel through the air with a whoosh. Seeing the hands that usually wielded a majestic double-edged axe now waving a cute little trowel made a snort of laughter escape me.

Unlike me, who was giggling, the two “species” were dead serious. Sephiroth and the two deer began circling each other with the garden in the center. It was a dignified, intense standoff, like two boxers looking for an opening in a sparring match.

Soon, their gazes locked, and they clashed simultaneously.

Ooh, fancy action.

The water deer were incredibly agile. They didn’t seem to have much attack power, but a direct hit from a tackle using their instantaneous speed looked like it could paralyze a player for quite a while. Sephiroth, on the other hand, was slower than the deer but had much higher attack power.

…Well, he should, right?

Honestly, I couldn’t tell anymore. Watching Sephiroth swing a trowel while shouting exclamations like “Water deer!” made it hard to distinguish if he was a top-tier ranker or some eccentric variety streamer from the deep sea of the internet.

Swish, flick!

Regardless of my thoughts, the battle between two deer and one human was fierce. It was a contest between the nimble deer trying to dive into the herb patch and Sephiroth, who was masterfully restricting their angles to block their entry. The water deer were far faster than any monster I had seen in Zelpia so far—so fast it was hard for my eyes to track them.

Wait… was Sephiroth’s high-level control actually forged through fighting water deer?

Infuriated that it couldn’t get its snack, one deer snorted loudly and let out a deafening shriek.

AAAAAAAACK!

The scream made my ears ring.

“They really made the sound implementation realistic…”

My murmur reached neither the deer nor Sephiroth. Sephiroth aimed a strike with his trowel at the back of a deer’s neck—it looked like he was trying to knock it out.

Wait, don’t tell me he sells the deer as pets too?

A very logical suspicion crossed my mind. I glanced over at the mole trap Sephiroth had set earlier. Perhaps startled by the rustling combat, a mole had attempted an escape; a fuzzy, chestnut-like head was now wiggling frantically, stuck inside the trap.

“Hey, you caught a mole!”

“Wait, I’ll be there in a sec. Nature’s Touch!”

At the news of the mole, Sephiroth’s movements accelerated. He lightly pivoted his body. Sensing an opening to the right, the two water deer lunged forward. Seizing that exact moment, Sephiroth’s frame leapt into the air and landed squarely on the back of one deer.

AAAAACK!

The deer bucked and thrashed, but it quickly quieted down as Sephiroth tightened his grip with his thighs. His thighs were intimidatingly thick; I could only hope the deer’s waist would remain intact. Holding the deer firmly, Sephiroth stuffed it into his inventory.

While I was marveling at the mysteries of inventory space, the other deer didn’t miss its chance and sprinted for the garden. Just as it was about to bite into a fresh, green sprout, the trowel flew through the air, spinning like a boomerang, and thwacked the back of the deer’s head.

Ack!

With a short cry, the deer stopped moving. Sephiroth didn’t miss the beat, grabbing it by the scruff. The deer regained consciousness and flailed about, but it was helpless against Sephiroth’s strength. Having successfully stored two water deer in his infinite inventory, Sephiroth walked back toward me with an elegant air, dusting off his hands.

“Now, shall we check on our cute mole?”

“Do you… do you sell the water deer as pets too?”

I finally asked the question that had been bugging me throughout the fight. Sephiroth looked down at me.

“Of course. If the fur is damaged, I can’t sell them for a high price, so it’s exhausting trying to catch them without leaving a mark.”

“…”

What kind of game was Zelpia exactly?

[Internal Forum Archive]

# (Question) About those Water Deer mounts, why are they Epic grade? Epic grade items are supposed to be super hard to get and rare, right? Usually, you can’t even buy Epics with gold. But I see so many people riding water deer. Why is the grade so high? I mean, when you check the stats, they are Epic level. Actually, they’re top-tier options even among Epics. My question is a mess, but anyway—

[Comments]

User1: Judging by your writing, your Korean grade must be a 9. └ OP: Screw you, I got a 2 in Korean. └ User2: Do kids call it “Korean” these days? Back in my day, it was “Language Arts”… └└ User3: Grandpa, can you even see the screen? └└└ User2: Ho ho, I’m a grandma, you brat.

User4: This is such a classic recurring question lol. Someone explained it ages ago. └ OP: Couldn’t find it T_T.

User5: My comment was getting too long, so I just brought the link from the official site. [Link] └ OP: Oh, thanks thanks!

# [Summary] Why there are so many Epic Grade Water Deer Mounts Author: ILoveWaterDeer | Views: 392,744 | Date: (2 years ago)

First of all, in Zelpia, Legendary and Epic grades are hard to get—that’s why they’re called Legendary and Epic. That means, originally, water deer were intended to be rare mounts/pets. So why did they become “common” pets that every Tom, d*ck, and Harry is riding?

Surprisingly, the cyber-bully Sephiroth is involved in this. Water deer are originally neutral monsters that appear when you cultivate your House Garden above a certain level. They don’t have attack power, but they spawn irregularly and their role is to ruin your crops. They’re fast, and if they succeed in wrecking the garden, they run away faster than anyone, making them super hard to catch.

However, their opponent was Sephiroth, a guy who kills even high-level Guard NPCs. The water deer that came to feast on Sephiroth’s garden were all caught by him and released into the market as pets. T_T That’s also why most water deer stats are top-tier. Originally, if a water deer gets hurt while you’re catching it, its grade drops. Even a scratch on the hide drops it to Mid-grade. But somehow, Sephiroth manages to live-capture them without a single scratch every time.

This is just a random thought, but… Members of the Water Deer Lovers Association like me think it’s a blessing that Sephiroth hasn’t quit the game. T_T If he did, who would supply us with water deer? T_T Let’s all love the cute water deer!

TL;DR:

1. Sephiroth catches them all.

[Comments]

Assoc. President: Great post, take my upvote. └ ILoveWaterDeer: Haha, President, is Rang-rang doing well? └ Assoc. President: Of course! └ PepsiCola: No friendship-posting here. └ SilverTasty: Wait, is “Rang-rang” seriously the name of a water deer? └ Assoc. President: Is there a problem with my Rang-rang’s name? Is there a law saying a deer can’t have a name like that? Are you infringing on deer rights right now? └ SilverTasty: ;;; Chill with the sudden acceleration.

SpiritTraining123: That psycho grows a garden?? That doesn’t suit him at all. └ ILoveWaterDeer: Don’t say that! If our supplier disappears, we’re doomed.

Antripus: Does he grow human heads in his garden? (Subject: The Psycho) └ ooooilioooo: Now that sounds plausible. └ Sephiroth: I grow herbs. └ Antripus: ??????

Overseas001: ** Holy sh*t, is this the real Sephiroth? └ Sephiroth: It’s fine. └ Assoc. President: Sephiroth-nim, thank you for always bringing us the water deer. └ Sephiroth: No problem.

I am something of a fatalist. Life often flows in unpredictable directions. For example, I had dreamed of being a soccer player until the 8th grade, but after an ankle injury, I suddenly devoted myself to studying. Fate loves to shake the roots of my peaceful life under the name of “coincidence.” It would be nice to be able to predict these coincidences, but frail humans cannot even foresee the misfortune right in front of them.