X
What did this trembling mean?
As I slowly sat up,
the vibrations running through my body grew wilder,
no longer something that could be called a mere tremor.
Was it because I was resisting this artificial love?
Or…
Had I already fallen?
My heartbeat pounded louder.
Each breath I took carried hints of excitement.
The thought that maybe—just maybe—
this love for Happy was real—
kept circling my mind.
And yet,
my defense mechanism continued to work,
repeating to myself, “Who am I?”
But still…
I might have already fallen.
Maybe that’s why—
At first,
I thought the trembling was a byproduct of despair.
I assumed it was just another wave of negativity consuming me.
And that was partially true.
Because the reality I faced was darker than ever.
It made perfect sense to tremble in rage,
or to be paralyzed by sorrow.
But I couldn’t allow that.
Hadn’t I already accepted this punishment from the Quest Jewel?
Even if this was a disgusting,
no, a beloved,
no…
I wasn’t sure what to call it anymore.
Maybe it was easier just to say…
She’s a magical girl.
So, even if these feelings were forced onto me,
even if my love for a magical girl was just the cost of my actions—
I had promised to accept it.
As I knelt on the soft mattress,
I reminded myself—
Just don’t forget, Yeres.
It’s okay to let this trembling feel like anticipation.
It’s okay to find happiness in her arms.
It’s okay to lose everything.
Just never forget—
Just never forget how monstrous this magical girl is.
Loving someone while hating them at the same time…
The contradiction felt eerily similar to Happy’s own love and madness.
“Ah.”
“What’s wrong, unnie?”
As I knelt on the mattress,
staring up at her,
a strange sense of anticipation stirred inside me.
As Happy stepped closer,
my heart raced violently,
as if it would burst.
It was the scent,
the beauty that was too vivid.
My defense mechanism kicked in,
forcing me to avert my gaze.
But that only led to another problem.
Suddenly,
the wrinkles on my white T-shirt started to bother me.
Now that I had become someone who loved Happy,
the traces of us lying together felt like a badge of honor—
Yet at the same time,
the wrinkled mess made me feel pathetic.
“Wait a second.”
“Is something wrong?”
“I just need a moment.”
“Alright.”
Happy nodded, stopping in place.
I quickly tucked the bottom of my shirt into my dolphin shorts,
then pulled at the fabric, trying to smooth out the creases.
“Tsk…!”
“Pfft. What are you doing?”
I had never done this before,
and now it was frustrating me.
I didn’t expect it to magically fix itself,
but I also didn’t think I’d somehow make it worse.
Seeing me struggle,
Happy covered her mouth, stifling a laugh.
“It’s the wrinkles…”
“Yeah, it’s pretty messy.”
“Why won’t they go away?”
“You were the Queen of Darkmoon, weren’t you?
And you don’t even know how to fix wrinkles?”
“…What’s that supposed to mean?”
“The clothes you used to wear—
they looked like they’d wrinkle easily.
Unless… did your subordinates handle that for you?”
“They were always wet anyway,
so I never cared.”
“Ah, I see.
Then I’ll take care of it for you.”
She wasn’t mocking me.
If she had been,
I would have been too embarrassed to even continue the conversation.
By the time I looked up,
Happy was already right in front of me,
light gathering in her hand.
“Yeres unnie.”
“Yeah?”
“You’re not scared?”
Even though she was using magic,
even though it was the same magic
that had killed me 131 times—
Even though that same light
had tormented me for two whole days—
I didn’t even flinch.
“Hmm…?”
Was I supposed to be afraid?
I tried to figure out
what magic had to do with removing wrinkles.
The fact that I was even thinking about this
proved just how much the Quest Jewel’s punishment
had warped my mind.
Don’t forget, Yeres.
That magical girl—
“But still…”
“Unnie and I were enemies, weren’t we?”
We’re not anymore, though.
Happy’s words, spoken a little too late,
sent another ripple through my thoughts.
I forced a smile and countered her words.
“We’re not enemies anymore, are we?”
“Why do you think that?”
“Because I can’t kill you, and you don’t want to kill me anymore.”
“…That’s right.
I just want to be with you forever.”
Happy’s expression darkened for a moment—
but just as quickly,
she pushed the gloom away with a bittersweet smile.
In the brief silence,
I caught a glimpse of Lunt watching us from afar.
With a deep sigh,
he scribbled words into the air.
[Tomorrow. You must escape.]
Before I could even nod,
the message vanished.
When I turned back to Happy,
her hand—filled with light—was already stroking my shoulder.
“How does that feel?”
The same magic
that had tormented me—
that had killed me 131 times—
felt… warm.
“You see?”
“Magic can be used like this, too.
It’s incredibly efficient, don’t you think?”
Efficient?
No—
What was the word I was looking for?
It was just… ridiculous.
Happy was using her light magic
to smooth out the wrinkles on my clothes.
“…Are you ironing my shirt?”
“That’s right.
I’m using the heat from the light to do it.”
It wasn’t just that.
As her hand moved across my shoulder,
I felt the chaotic thoughts in my head begin to fade away.
All the feelings that had denied her love,
all the emotions that hated her—
they were slipping away.
Was that a good thing?
Or was that… dangerous?
As my body grew hotter,
even my breath felt warm.
The artificial love from the Quest Jewel,
and the real love that Happy had always showered me with—
they were blending together.
The result was so sickeningly sweet,
it tasted bitter.
And for the first time—
I felt a strong urge
to bury myself in her arms.
“All done.”
The words snapped me back to reality.
It was a shameful thought,
but I had let my mind wander too far.
The way Happy’s hand touched me—
the way her warmth spread through me—
I had let filthy ideas take root.
“So… what do you want to do to me?”
Some of those thoughts…
I wasn’t even sure if they were physically possible between two women.
And others…
They were so depraved,
I felt disgusted with myself.
“This is what I wanted to do.”
But Happy…
She betrayed my expectations.
The love that had been forced onto me
felt genuine—
and yet,
all she wanted…
was to rest her head on my lap.
A lap pillow.
It was nothing like the intensity she had shown in the morning.
A sigh slipped from my lips—
either from disappointment,
or from relief.
Maybe both.
Still, I didn’t hate it.
As my fading smile returned,
I gently brushed my fingers through her hair.
“Mm… Even though our blood is different,
I really want to be your little sister.”
I nodded.
If that’s what she wanted,
then for today—
No.
For this life,
I would play along.
“In a world where no one understands me,
I just wanted at least one person to see me for who I am.”
Her next words were something I could accept.
So I nodded again.
And as I did,
the bitterness in her smile slowly began to fade away.
“I wanted someone to love me,
even knowing how insane I am.”
She wasn’t wrong.
We were insane.
A magical girl obsessed with her enemy.
And the former Queen of Darkmoon,
who had given in to that love.
We both knew exactly how deranged we were.
“I’m glad that person is you, unnie.”
Me too.
I almost said it out loud.
But I swallowed the words before they could escape.
I couldn’t let myself go that far.
The red gem on the floor vibrated softly,
as if urging me to do so.
But I bit down on my lip,
forcing myself to stay grounded.
Happy and I…
We were enemies.
I shouldn’t love her.
No—
Maybe we weren’t enemies anymore.
Maybe it was okay to love her.
But I couldn’t sink too deep.
Because if I did…
Then in my 133rd life,
I might never be able to escape the punishment of the Quest Jewel.
Punishment is punishment.
I was supposed to suffer,
not enjoy it.
I reminded myself of that.
And then,
I lowered my head—
and bit down on her upper lip.
A small act of revenge
for what she had done to me this morning.
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Read : I Became the Protagonist's Attachment Doll
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