Chapter 31: Don’t Leave Me Behind

I stayed sulky the whole time until we arrived at the rest stop where we planned to stay for the night.

Han Jun crosses the line easily and reaches out without hesitation.

Sometimes he takes care of me so gently that my heart melts.

It’s incredibly hard to ignore the fluttering feelings that rise up because of him.

I want to just go with my feelings and let things flow naturally, but if I do that, I feel like the damage I’ll take later will be too great.

I know it’s pathetic that I can’t firmly stop him either, but I still ended up blaming Han Jun.

As soon as we got out of the car, Han Jun grabbed me and asked what was wrong, and I started pouring out my complaints.

I told him he was probably acting clingy because he was lonely right now, but thinking about the future, we shouldn’t be doing this.

I said I wished he would keep some boundaries.

I admitted that it was also my fault for getting carried away and falling for the temptation.

At first, I tried to speak seriously and calmly, but gradually my emotions started spiraling again.

This sly bastard.

Just because you’re handsome, does that make everything okay?

Do you know how much trouble I willingly went through for you?

How hard I tried to accommodate you?

And you’re playing with me?

In the end, you’re just going to abandon me, right?!

The image of Han Jun fooling around with someone else flashed before my eyes, and anger surged up uncontrollably.

At the same time, I felt hurt.

I still have no power and I’m insignificant, while Han Jun has awakened his abilities and become strong.

Compared to him, I feel even more lacking, and that makes me even more restless.

If I were more capable and confident, maybe I wouldn’t be this angry.

“Hey? Are you playing with me? You’ll do this with someone else later too, right?! I’m just a joke to you, right?! Say something! Tell me!”

Damn it, I couldn’t control my mouth either.

Like a jealous lover, I started going wild.

Once the mouth of a disaster opens, it never knows how to close, and I rampaged like a lunatic, leaving Han Jun completely flustered.

Han Jun listened to me for a long time before tightly shutting his eyes and opening them again.

Then he frowned as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing and let out a deep sigh.

“No, I mean… why does your train of thought go in that direction? I thought you hated it.”

Han Jun, who had been nervously watching my reactions the whole way here, tilted his head back in frustration.

A loud cracking sound came from his neck, as if he had been holding tension there the whole time.

“So you hate me?”

“It’s not that I hate you.”

“Then… do you like me?”

“…Yeah. I do.”

That’s the problem.

I like you too much.

“…Then what’s the problem?”

Han Jun inhaled briefly and asked again.

His slightly flushed face looked like he might be angry, or maybe embarrassed.

“Well, you’re going to become even more successful later. And you’ll leave me and soar far away into the sky…”

“Why would I leave you?”

“…There are things you don’t understand.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“You never know what might happen.”

What’s the point of raising you well if someone else just takes you away?

No, it’s destined to happen anyway.

When Han Jun, who was once like a baby bird, becomes an adult, he’ll spread his wings and leave the nest.

And after he leaves, I’ll be the one left guarding the empty nest alone.

How lonely would that be?

Of course, Han Jun was nothing like a baby bird.

He was more like some kind of beast.

Still, there’s nothing more painful than being the only one worrying in this ambiguous relationship that is neither family nor lovers.

Surviving alone is already exhausting and stressful.

I didn’t want to add another problem on top of that.

If he keeps acting clingy like this, I’ll never escape this worry for the rest of my life.

“So what should I do? What would make you believe me?”

“What do you mean what should you do.”

The only option is to go back.

Back to being just friends.

I was about to say it, but my mouth felt dry and my heart tightened painfully.

That only made me more determined.

Before these useless feelings deepen and leave me badly hurt, it would be better to restore this ambiguous relationship to what it used to be.

I don’t know if it will work though.

Before I waste more emotions… before my heart completely tilts in a strange direction… maybe I should at least try.

“So, from now on, let’s stop doing these weird things—”

“What kind of nonsense are you talking about?”

Han Jun cut me off before I could finish.

His face flushed red.

The calm expression he had maintained even while I was throwing a fit disappeared in an instant.

“Huh?”

“You’re mine, hyung. So why would I stop?”

Han Jun’s train of thought was just as strange as mine.

How could he make a joke like that in such a serious situation?

“…Because my heart will get hurt.”

I gently placed a hand on my chest and spoke sincerely.

But Han Jun ignored my words completely and suddenly grabbed the back of my neck.

“Are you really that clueless? Or are you pretending?”

“…What?”

He grabbed my collar and pulled me right in front of his face.

Meeting his intense gaze, I swallowed nervously.

“I waited because you were the one who started messing with me first. But you kept letting things slide like nothing happened. And yet you never say you hate it. Even after all this.”

As he said that, he twisted the tip of my chest.

“Ah…!”

“You don’t say you hate it. When I touch you, you just gasp like you like it. And then what? Now you’re saying we should stop because I might betray you someday? Are you joking?”

Han Jun glared at me with a flushed face and growled.

There was a faint moisture in his eyes.

“You’re the one playing with me.”

It seems… I really did something wrong.

I had been so focused on the end of humanity that I neglected to look into his feelings.

Instead of taking time to sort out emotions, I spent my time worrying about how we would survive.

At that time, reason felt more important than feelings.

So I sorted out my own feelings.

But what about his?

What exactly is Han Jun thinking?

Unless he really was just playing with me.

My mind became complicated again.

“So… I just thought… for our sake…”

“Lift your head. Look at me.”

When I lowered my head because my thoughts were in a mess and I felt timid, Han Jun grabbed my hair.

With my hair held like that, I had no choice but to meet his eyes again.

“I… hyung… I…”

Han Jun struggled to speak.

His lips trembled as he forced the words out.

Seeing his face flushed all the way down to his neck, I could feel how embarrassed he was.

I could clearly feel his hesitation and embarrassment.

But I simply waited.

For some reason, I wanted to.

“I… like you, hyung… So I won’t let you go. I can’t let you go.”

He told me to lift my head, but his own head dropped down.

His breathing was rough, and the hand gripping my hair trembled slightly.

It was a rare sight—Han Jun being shy again.

He could at least let go of my hair before confessing.

This feels more like a threat than a confession.

“Jun.”

Even though he was still holding my hair, my chest filled with warmth.

He looked cute, flustered and embarrassed like that.

It must be because I’m completely smitten.

To think I’d find Jun—who’s taller and bigger than me—cute.

After hearing his feelings, my heart suddenly calmed down.

Just moments ago it had been wildly restless.

The discomfort and anxiety I felt when imagining him leaving, and the pounding of my heart hearing his confession, made one thing clear.

The feelings I had been pretending not to see were now right in front of me.

“Can I really do this?”

“What’s stopping me?”

Those two thoughts fought back and forth inside my head.

Soon, one side won.

“I…”

“Don’t say anything.”

I was about to tell him that since he looked cute to me, maybe my feelings were the same.

But Han Jun covered my mouth.

Why?

With my mouth blocked, I blinked in confusion.

“You look like you’re about to say something weird. Just keep quiet. You’re better when you’re silent… or when you’re moaning.”

What kind of nonsense is that?

And what does he take me for?

Still, it seems Han Jun’s trust in me was nearly nonexistent.

He looked completely convinced I was about to say something stupid.

Come to think of it, after hearing me say we should stop earlier, he might be afraid of whatever I’d say next.

But I was actually trying to say the opposite.

“If you open your mouth, I’ll do you right here today.”

With that terrifying threat, he completely shut my mouth—then kissed me.

He bit my lips, pulled at my tongue, and kissed me roughly.

Clinging to him, I thought about how to cross this deep valley of distrust between us.

The task ahead of me seemed like a mountain.

But believing that someday the sunlight would melt away his doubts, I closed my eyes.

When I relaxed and gave in, Han Jun’s kiss gradually softened.

Even so, he kneaded my backside the whole time and kept kissing me until my lips felt numb.

My mouth really suffered today.

Finally, Han Jun pulled away with a reluctant look and bit my lower lip once more.

“Ugh.”

The sharp sting made my brows knit together.

I started wondering if Han Jun actually wanted to eat me alive.

He keeps biting different parts of my body more and more often.

“Tastes good… hyung.”

“That hurts…”

My lips were so numb that I couldn’t even pronounce the words properly.

Because the electricity was cut off, most of the food in the rest stop’s refrigerator had spoiled.

The potatoes had sprouted, and green mold had grown on the rice cakes.

Most fresh foods were ruined, and the only things that survived were processed or dried foods like ramen and ham.

So we filled our stomachs with noodle soup loaded with dried shrimp and shiitake mushrooms.

The rest stop and its surroundings were eerily quiet.

There wasn’t a single trace of people.

Meeting humans had become harder than meeting monsters.

Since leaving my grandfather’s house, we hadn’t met a single person.

Then again, with monsters wandering around, most people probably wouldn’t go outside unless they had powers like Han Jun.

I started wondering what the situation in the city might be like.

Would there be more people there?

Since my grandfather also awakened powers, it seemed likely that there were other superpowered people in the city too.

But the radio only kept announcing locations where monsters appeared.

There was no other information.

At this rate, reaching the city would take a long time, and it worried me.

Before sunset, we spread out our sleeping bags and lay down to prepare for tomorrow.

“Jun.”

“Yeah?”

“My butt didn’t do anything wrong, right?”

We were lying face to face, but he wouldn’t stop grabbing my backside as if it had personally offended him.

I was tired, but it kept bothering me so much that I couldn’t sleep.

“Did you know your butt is incredibly firm?”

“….”

“Having a butt like that is the real crime.”

“…Right. I guess I’m a sinner.”

The threat Han Jun made earlier echoed in my ears.

That terrifying line about doing me.

I closed my eyes, thankful at least that his hand hadn’t slipped between my cheeks.

Ah, what a sinful person I am for having such a firm butt.

Mother, why did you give me such a resilient backside?

Just before I drifted into sleep, Han Jun muttered softly.

“Hyung, I’ll listen to you well… so don’t leave me behind.”

Like a whining child, he hugged me tightly as he said it.

Was my earlier suggestion about stopping really that shocking to him?

He suddenly started acting clingy in a way he never did before.

What a handful.

Suddenly, I remembered a story from his childhood.

When his mother said she would run away if he didn’t behave, the young Han Jun must have been terrified.

Why would I leave you?

I already said I’d stick by you.

Yet he’s still worrying about it.

Han Jun really worries a lot.

“…Alright, you brat.”

“Don’t go.”

“I said alright.”

“I’ll do even better.”

“…You’re already doing well enough.”

Feeling sorry for him, I hugged him back.

I stroked his broad back and patted him gently, telling him to sleep.

Soon, the mischievous hand squeezing my butt relaxed, and his breathing became steady.

After watching Han Jun sleep for a moment, I lay down comfortably and fell asleep too.

I don’t even know how many monsters we encountered on our way to the city.

Several times a day we had to stop the car just to fight them.

The closer we got to the city, the more monsters there were, slowing our travel more and more.

It seemed that the more people gathered in a place, the more monsters appeared there too.

To make matters worse, accidents kept happening along the way.

Sometimes the tire burst after running over a monster stuck to the ground.

Other times we ran out of fuel in the middle of a vast empty road like an endless sea.

After spending a full two weeks on the road, we finally reached the city entrance.

“It’s blocked.”

We stopped the car in front of the city gate.

A barricade had been set up at the entrance.

I couldn’t tell if it was meant to stop people from leaving or to stop people from entering, but the road was completely blocked.

I was wondering if we’d have to abandon the car when Han Jun solved the problem easily.

“Don’t we just have to get over the barricade?”

He casually lifted our car into the air.

What a genius.

Just like that, we floated over the barricade surrounded by sharp metal spikes and entered the city.

As buildings began appearing one by one, the atmosphere felt terrifying.

Broken signs and dark storefronts made the place look like an abandoned city.

Large cracks ran through the buildings, and the unmaintained roads were rough and uneven, making driving difficult.

It seemed the city had been devastated even more than I expected.

The gray city, without even a single blade of grass, looked exactly like the world of ruin I had imagined.