Chapter 126: Cracks in the Balance

“Honestly, I don’t think your matching rate with me is that great.”

“So you’re saying you’re dissatisfied?”

Song Jihan started nitpicking first thing in the morning.

Hearing something like that right in the middle of guiding makes it sound like he’s criticizing my guiding itself.

Is he sulking because we didn’t eat meat together yesterday?

“I mean, it stabilizes fast, sure, but how should I put it…

It’s like filling your stomach with a pill instead of eating a proper meal when you’re starving?”

It’s a strange metaphor, but… I kind of agree.

Back when I was an esper myself, I didn’t realize it, but now that I’m guiding, I can tell—

my mana doesn’t mesh particularly well with Song Jihan’s.

There are people who are outright difficult to guide, and Jihan isn’t exactly that.

But it’s not comfortable either.

There’s none of that resonant trembling, the feeling of mana synchronizing the way it does with Jaeyul.

“My apologies.

Instead of a full-course feast, I served you a pill.”

That doesn’t mean he gets to complain so openly.

Maybe I should just give him the shittiest guiding possible and send him packing.

“And also… every time you guide me, it feels like you’re staring at my naked body.”

“…….”

I have nothing to say to that.

I’m not peeping—no!

I’m checking the flow of mana inside his body.

Every single time, to see if there’s any sign of gate sickness.

I neither can nor want to see Song Jihan naked.

“Sigh… what’s so cute about a guy like you anyway….”

“What?

You think I’m cute?”

Is his hearing broken?

How do you even get that from what I said?

I don’t even want to respond anymore.

“Just eat this and go.”

“…Again?

How many of these do you even have?

No, seriously, how do you have this in the first place?”

Song Jihan stared uneasily at the Petra I handed him instead of eating it.

Looks like he’s worried I got it through illegal means.

Lately, I’ve been making sure he takes Petra regularly too.

It’s for gate sickness prevention, so there’s no need for a high dose—

I grind up a lower-grade Petra finely so it won’t raise suspicion.

“I told you.

I joined the center on the condition that I’d get Petra.”

“That still doesn’t explain how a guide gets Petra.”

Hmm… should I explain this?

No.

It’s better if he doesn’t know the source.

“You don’t need to know.”

“…Don’t tell me.

Is Team Leader Seon your supplier?”

He somehow landed on the correct answer, but why call him a “supplier”?

I’m not running a smuggling ring.

“I said you don’t need to know.”

“I’m not eating it. Take it back.”

Wow.

Turning down free Petra.

What a spoiled bastard.

“It’s not like the team leader brought it, so just eat it.”

“…Really?

Then where did you get it from?”

I don’t even know where to begin explaining.

Talking about illegal guiding offices is out of the question,

and so is casually mentioning sneaking in and out of gates.

It’s too much hassle.

So instead, I grabbed the Petra and shoved it straight into his mouth.

“Just eat it.

It’s good for you—why do you ask so many questions?”

“Cough!

Y-You… trying to kill me, cough!”

There was a bit of trouble, but the mission of making Song Jihan take his medicine was a success.

Tomorrow, should I mix it into coffee?

Or hide it inside a sandwich?

It’s kind of ridiculous, going this far when it’s not even for my own health.

Still, it’s better than reliving that again.

If I can prevent that worst-case past from repeating, it’s worth the effort.

“I told you not to have unnecessary conversations in the guiding room.”

I almost jumped out of my skin.

How does Jaeyul approach without making a sound or even a presence?

Seeing him standing by the door made my heart lurch violently.

But maybe I was the only one startled—

Song Jihan looked at him calmly, as if he’d known he was there all along.

“Come on, what’s more necessary than people getting to know each other?

You’re young, Team Leader, so you might not know, but when I was in charge,

I valued harmony between team members above all else.”

“Good to know you’re old, so stop waving your age around like a badge.

If you miss your latte-era that much, go start your own team even now.”

Oof.

Huh…?

Was that meant for me to hear?

I didn’t say a word, but the thorn in Jaeyul’s voice stabbed straight into my chest.

I’m the same age as Song Jihan, you know….

“Haa… I’m leaving.”

Another round, another win for Jaeyul.

After getting smacked with age-related damage, Jihan left the guiding room after saying goodbye to me,

still unable to calm his anger.

Once the door closed and I confirmed it was just Jaeyul and me, I finally spoke.

“Why are you two so desperate to tear each other apart?

From where I’m standing, it doesn’t look like simple hierarchy stuff.

I’m right, aren’t I?”

Until now, I hadn’t brought up Song Jihan with Jaeyul directly.

There’d already been misunderstandings once,

and Jaeyul probably needed time to sort out his authority.

But I was done waiting.

“It’s really not my fault.

Nine times out of ten, he’s the one picking fights, right?”

…That’s not wrong.

Jihan does tend to provoke first.

But Jaeyul’s responses are just as sharp.

It feels like he’s trying to crush Jihan completely.

“And now you’re taking that bastard’s side?

You said I was young and clueless—so now I’m the one in the wrong?”

“No… that’s not what I meant….”

I didn’t phrase it that harshly, Jaeyul….

Still, I can see why he’d be hurt.

But the two of them need to stop here.

If this tension keeps going, the rest of the team will suffer.

Even I feel drained just watching this in the office—

inside a gate, it’d be unbearable.

“There has to be a limit.

You punish someone as much as they deserve—

the problem is you go all out over the smallest thing.

I don’t get why our Jaeyul is so sensitive.”

“Hah.

So in the end, you’re saying I’m the one at fault?

Figures.

Guess there really was a reason you kept feeding that bastard Petra.”

Why is he saying that so coldly…?

I was trying to lighten the mood and talk him down,

but Jaeyul replied with a dead-serious face, no hint of a smile.

Seeing that stubborn expression—one with no intention of backing down—

irritated me too.

No matter how annoyed he is over Jihan,

did he really need to talk to me like that?

“Yes.

You keep telling him to transfer teams every chance you get—

who does that?

Do you think it was easy for Song Jihan to give up his comfortable life in Busan and come here?

And the Petra I give him isn’t even stuff Poppy would eat.”

Of course, I’m on Jaeyul’s side.

If both Jaeyul and Jihan were in danger,

I’d save Jaeyul.

Instinctively.

That’s exactly why his attitude hurts more.

Who cares about someone like Song Jihan—

why is Jaeyul turning that sharp gaze on me?

“Enough.

I don’t care what you think.

This time, I’m not backing down.”

“Why are you taking it that far?”

It’s suffocating.

He won’t explain why he’s doing this,

only acts resentful—what am I supposed to do with that?

“It’s all because of you.”

“…What?”

I’d wanted to hear the reason so badly,

but when it finally came out of Jaeyul’s mouth, I couldn’t process it.

Because of me…?

Why?

What did I even do?

“Forget it.

Let’s stop here.”

As if those words had slipped out in anger,

Jaeyul turned away, trying to end the conversation.

I snapped out of it and grabbed his wrist before he could leave.

“Why is it because of me?

What did I do to you?

Say it properly before you go.”

I’m not letting him walk away like this.

I tightened my grip on his wrist, putting my resolve into it.

“I want to kick that bastard out right now,

but I’m holding back.

I even want to cut off the hand that chose Song Jihan as a team member.”

…That serious?

Hearing how intense his feelings were, I finally realized the gravity of it.

Something far bigger than I’d thought must have happened.

Jaeyul’s emotions kept escalating.

The muscles under my hand bulged as he clenched his wrist.

But I can’t back down either.

I have to know why he’s this angry.

Only then can I decide—

whether to send Song Jihan away,

or even leave the center entirely,

to bring Jaeyul back to himself.

“So why.”

No matter what, I’ll be on Jaeyul’s side.

I feel bad for Song Jihan, but there’s no contest.

Nothing comes before Jaeyul.

“He says he likes you.

And that you like him too.

He says the only reason he joined our team was because of you.”

Wait—what…?

What kind of bullshit is that?

I was so shocked I forgot to respond.

Only then did Jaeyul turn fully to face me.

His eyes were blazing, his face twisted with anger—

yet somehow, he didn’t look scary at all.

If anything… he looked pitiful.

Like a puppy soaked through in the rain.

Jaeyul gripped my shoulders tightly.

What on earth did he talk about with Song Jihan?

Did that idiot really say it exactly like that?

No—Jaeyul probably exaggerated it a bit.

First, I need to calm him down.

“That’s just him being delusional—”

“We already went through rut together.

How do you expect me to just sit there and take that?”

Wait.

What is he saying right now?

It took me a moment to process the words that slipped out.

He remembers…?

No—don’t jump to conclusions yet.

It is true that he was with me during both ruts.

“What do you mean by that…?”

I forced my voice to stay calm, hiding my pounding heart.

But that wasn’t even the most shocking part.

“I remember everything.”

…What?

Everything—what, exactly?