Chapter 126: You Saved Me

“When I’m in front of you, I always feel like a child.”

Although still young, no one called Philius a child anymore.

Though many were curious about the extent of the wealth and influence he had built.

Even when he was a boy, he had always endured and held back. The reason Philip, the butler, was afraid of him was partly because he didn’t reveal his inner thoughts even to him.

But now, he couldn’t do that. Not to the only partner of his imprinting, the one person he had wanted since boyhood.

He sometimes thought about it. What would have happened if he hadn’t gone to that pub that day.

When he heard about the boy with exceptionally sensitive hands, quick calculation, and formidable eloquence, Philius was definitely intrigued.

Still, it wasn’t enough to change his already fixed schedule to go see him.

Moreover, the person he was scheduled to meet that day was a mage sent by the former King, his half-brother.

It was a notification that reminded him of the laboratory he was dragged to when his Rut period came in his childhood.

Memories in the palace couldn’t have good moments.

The reason Philius went to the palace was the sudden death of his parents. When the two passed away together with a day or two difference due to an epidemic, Philius felt sadness.

Although they were parents who showed no affection to their son, it was a clear fact that they were the people who made up his world.

“Live as if you were dead. I will never forgive you if your voice is heard carelessly.”

Since the first words of his half-brother, whom he had admired, were like that, he had no choice but to be even more intimidated.

Young Philius stayed in the palace as if he didn’t exist, as ordered by his half-brother. Although he had to be careful with every action, he didn’t know back then that that time was the most peaceful.

When the Rut approached, he swallowed screams amidst terrible pain, but Philius was eventually dragged to the laboratory.

Monster. It was the word he heard most there.

The gazes looking at him with disgust were more painful than the pain inflicted on his body.

Glances as if something that shouldn’t exist in the world existed.

The distorted face of his half-brother, who sincerely hated him, pierced his heart more severely than the pain of raw flesh tearing and reattaching.

That expression tore apart the hope the young boy cherished precious.

Even when he turned eighteen, received the title of Duke of Westell, and left the palace, his half-brother’s suspicion and interference didn’t decrease.

When torture disguised as experiments continued as if trying to find out the limit of pain Philius could endure, even after confirming several times that he became unable to exert as powerful a force as before since he tore the limbs of mages unable to endure in the end, he couldn’t withdraw his suspicion.

That day was the day he was notified that a mage would be sent as if testing him.

Philius barely suppressed the desire to run out immediately and waited for him.

But when notified of the unilateral cancellation of the appointment following the unilateral appointment with a short line of text, he couldn’t endure any longer.

The desire to leave for somewhere abruptly led him to Billy’s pub.

It was a dirty and smelly place, but everyone except him looked merry. The boy with shaggy hair looked the most lively among them.

“You brought 1 Penny less worth again. You’re doing this on purpose, right?”

“Ah, I matched it exactly this time!”

The scrawny boy, rolling up old clothes much bigger than his body and walking busily here and there, wasn’t intimidated even in front of a large mercenary whom he could easily subdue with one arm.

“Look, I’m right. Give me 1 more Penny.”

He felt inexplicably spiteful at the bold appearance of eventually getting 1 more Penny from the mercenary whose face turned red and blue.

Even though seeing with his own eyes was enough to know the boy possessed outstanding qualities, he deliberately asked questions pretending to be cold.

Maybe his mood twisted seeing the boy, who acted confidently even to a mercenary who seemed capable of splitting the old table of the pub at once, showing clear signs of tension towards him.

But when the Beta boy showed no reaction to his pheromones trying to dominate his mind, Philius could feel signs that the hope miserably torn apart was trying to attach again.

Even while thinking he shouldn’t, he kept the boy, Jay, close to his side.

While watching him, emotions grew willfully. Although he knew the emotion Jay harbored for him was pity, it didn’t matter.

It was also something unavoidable. Once realized, the heart couldn’t be turned back.

So when Spes Umbra brought the engagement document forced by the former King, when he opened his room door during Rut using Jay’s hand, when he knew traces of assault remained on Jay’s cheek, he had to despair.

Because Jay suffered because he was weak.

He realized he couldn’t protect him just by holding his breath.

Consequently, that he can live properly now is all thanks to Jay.

Philius laid Jay down on the bed. Being able to hold him like this with nothing covering each other’s bodies was thanks to the hope Jay wove attaching firmly and growing gradually.

The time when he was pessimistic about his situation unable to dream of the future seems like a distant past. Philius now couldn’t draw a single line of life without Jay conversely.

“Jay.”

When he called his name, Jay scattered laughter like the scene of lilacs blooming profusely. Along with his pheromone scent spreading.

As he opened his arms, blue light spread from the watch on his left wrist and the ring on his ring finger.

Only the red diamond embedded in the center of the watch vomited heterogeneous light within it.

The moment the red light touched his eyes, Philius felt the desire that never cooled down even once becoming more heightened.

Philius remembered Jay’s words that sapphire and ruby are the same mineral. He couldn’t forget.

When he saw Jay excited by manifestation fever, Philius couldn’t control his pheromones. Spreading recklessly, they always aroused fear and disgust in people.

So it was a moment when he desperately wanted to control but couldn’t.

On the other hand, he also expected. Since Jay never feared him during Rut, wouldn’t he accept him generously this time too?

Expectation contrary to self-loathing was just another name for anxiety.

“Pretty…”

But Jay didn’t avoid his reddened eyes. Rather, he even reached out and touched them.

He saved him, always.

Now he was wearing blue and red on his body. The same colors as his two eye colors.

“Do you like it, Phil?”

When Jay, noticing the gaze fixed on the watch, asked smiling, Philius couldn’t do any other action than nodding.

Whether as the Duke of Westell who now has quite a few people fawning over him, or as a monster everyone wants to run away from, to Jay, he was just Phil.

It didn’t matter to him whether his eyes were blue or red.

No, he seemed to feel closer to the appearance revealing blatant desire intact through red eyes.

“Pretty.”

Just like now stroking his eye corner reaching out his hand, there was no hesitation in his actions and tone.

That fact couldn’t be anything but pleasing for Philius.

Although as a greedy person, he always wishes Jay would act and speak like now.

Philius snatched Jay’s hand tapping his eye corner.

Kissed the fingertips lightly and soon put the whole finger in his mouth and sucked.

As he scratched the connecting part between fingers with his tongue, he saw Jay opening his eyes wide and covering his mouth with the remaining hand.

Signs of surprise at the caress deepened at once along with the pheromone scent flowing out recklessly seemed evident.

But soon the lilac scent also thickened as much. At the flower scent completely wrapping him, Philius moved his tongue more busily.

He saw Jay squinting one eye soon. Philius didn’t miss the fact that the eye corner flushed red.

Haa. Jay’s breathing sound was heard.

The hand that covered his own mouth reached out toward him. Philius leaned his body forward as if waiting.

“Why…”

“Hmm?”

“Why do I react to everything you do?”

Jay speaking looked even innocent.

But he wasn’t an ignorant person, and Philius himself knew that fact better than anyone. Therefore, he felt goosebumps down his spine.

Because Jay, naked like him lying under his naked body, looked completely defenseless.

He is a person with thorough boundaries.

The distinction between people he acknowledged and those he didn’t was clear.

People sharing friendship with him are those accepted slowly over a long time.

If one tries to cross the line carelessly, Jay pushed them away hardening his boundaries as if raising thorns.

Philius also knew how solid that boundary was because he had tried to cross without his consent.

Such a person was now accepting him defenselessly.