Chapter 129: Choose the Kiss

Jay inhaled slowly and exhaled again. He felt the scent of the forest mixed in the air. That fact was a comfort.

The spot next to him in the bed was empty. Unusually for Philius who didn’t go out often, it was a day he said he had work to attend to outside from the morning. The bank, which was now settling down, and the synthetic diamond business, which grew explosively after the streetlights in the Beta residential area successfully lit up the night, were places he had to look after.

He moved as carefully as possible not to wake Jay, but Jay couldn’t help but wake up.

Is that also an effect of pregnancy? Philius’s presence felt sensitive.

Jay got up from the bed following him and tidied up the flustered Philius’s attire. Even in the midst of that, it was Philius-like behavior not to let Jay bend his waist.

And he went out after scattering pheromones for Jay.

It was a time not much different from the usual wake-up time. Bright light was already entering through the window leading to the balcony. It was a perfect time to sit at the table, drink tea, and read the newspaper.

But Jay returned to the bed and even lowered all the canopies to block the light.

Sleep didn’t come again. Yet he couldn’t get up from the bed.

The spot where Philius got up was cold. Jay reached out and fumbled that spot. It felt like a thicker forest scent than what was scattered in the air was pooled there.

Isn’t he behaving too unusually? Being apart is not even for a day but just a few hours.

Jay stroked his stomach with the other hand. The belly hadn’t grown big enough for anyone to notice he was pregnant. Still, at the shape clearly bulging more than before, Jay ended up chuckling.

“I’m not blaming you.”

He whispered as if afraid the child in his womb might misunderstand. The unusual one was him, not the child.

I think I heard Alpha pheromones are needed. Jay buried his nose in the pillow Philius slept on. The forest scent felt thicker seemed to calm his needlessly wavering heart.

Did I depend on him this much? Enough to feel empty over just a few hours of separation.

When he was Han Jay, he was a person who lived on his own merit. He had heard several times from friends that they couldn’t understand his insides at all. At that time, he couldn’t understand why he had to hear such words. There were also times when he received rebukes saying that’s why he couldn’t date.

Did he become a bit more honest in this life? Jay recognized exactly that the emotion he was feeling now was loneliness. And that fact felt a bit absurd too.

If his emotions became richer than before, it was all thanks to Philius.

Thanks to the person not present here right now.

Continuing his thoughts, Jay sighed. It seemed to have flowed too sentimentally.

****

Eventually, Jay got up from his seat only when it became late. When easy-to-digest soup came out for a late breakfast much closer to lunch, he laughed a little. Because he knew the chef would have had to adjust the temperature with a double boiler all along to serve it to him just right, neither too hot nor too cold.

The reason he couldn’t become a perfect noble was clear. Because when food or clothes were prepared in perfect condition, he knew too well how much effort went into it behind the scenes. If he were a perfect noble, he should have evaluated only by the result, but Jay couldn’t do that.

Jay had no will to become a perfect noble, and Philius didn’t force him either. Maybe he’s the person living most comfortably in Henia. Jay defined himself that way.

“Please tell the chef I enjoyed the meal, Philip.”

“Yes, the chef will be very pleased.”

Philip still treated him politely. Thinking this was also unavoidable, Jay got up from his seat.

Slow steps led outside the main building. His destination was the garden where lilac trees were planted.

The blooming season had passed long ago, and only green leaves were lush.

It looked like a mixture of Philius’s forest and his own lake harmonizing. It would be more accurate to call it a small pond rather than a lake, but it was clear that it was a place where his heart felt at ease. Much more than that place in the dream.

It was clear Philius had pondered to make him feel that way. Even looking at this chair. Although it looked like a tree with only a stump remaining, it was actually a chair carved to sit comfortably.

Jay lowered his waist there and dipped his hand into the pond. Thanks to the magic circle installed to maintain a constant temperature, the water temperature wasn’t shockingly cold but just enough to convey a pleasant refreshing feeling.

He felt like sighing for no reason. Whether it was a sigh from relief that he could hide here, or a sigh from emptiness that Philius wasn’t by his side, he didn’t know.

It must be both.

Jay eventually sighed.

He thought it was fortunate there was no urgent work to do right now. Because with his current mood, he didn’t want to do anything.

If workaholic Han Jay said he didn’t want to do anything, many people would have been surprised. Maybe even people who know the current Jay might think so.

Let alone documents, not even a book to read for pastime was in Jay’s hand right now. He just stared blankly at the green leaves covering the sky.

The scent from wet soil, moss, and trees seemed to calm his mind.

Contrary to sighing, Jay inhaled deeply and closed his eyes. Leaning his back against the tall tree behind the chair, he closed his eyes.

He felt like sleep was coming again.

****

Jay opened his eyes again because the forest scent became thicker.

It wasn’t a natural phenomenon. It was Philius’s pheromones.

“Are you uncomfortable anywhere?”

In front of Jay who opened his eyes, indeed Philius was kneeling and looking up.

It seems he slept deeper than he thought. Like right after manifesting. Is he still dreaming? Not feeling reality, Jay couldn’t say anything.

“Where is uncomfortable?”

When no answer returned, wrinkles formed on Philius’s brow. Only then could Jay realize he woke up from sleep. The weight of the blanket draped over his shoulders was also felt. That thing he never put on himself must have been given by Philius.

“Nowhere is uncomfortable.”

Even though he spoke in a whisper with a locked voice, Philius understood correctly. The deepening wrinkles on his brow were proof.

It was real reality.

Jay reached out and rubbed Philius’s brow. Red light descended between leaves seeped into his fingers.

“The sun is setting before I knew it.”

Even though he spoke in informal language, Philius’s wrinkles didn’t fully smooth out. No, it seemed to deepen rather.

“Were you here all along?”

Although not all along, it was clear he slept sitting for quite a long time, so Jay just smiled instead of answering. As if words saying it’s difficult to answer were written on his expression, Philius frowned deeper.

“Breakfast?”

“Ate it.”

“Lunch?”

“……”

As expected, it was a difficult question to answer, so Jay just bloomed an ambiguous smile again. Philius looked up at him with reproaching eyes.

It was funny even to himself. Just because Philius was away for half a day, his life rhythm became a mess.

He felt like he became a child whose mom couldn’t leave even for a moment.

“I’m not that hung…”

The moment he was about to say hungry, his body reacted honestly. When a growling sound rang out, Jay ended up blushing red.

“I should tell them to hurry with meal preparation.”

Philius said raising one eyebrow, so Jay moved his finger and swept his eyebrow.

“Embarrassing.”

“What is?”

“I feel like I became a child who can’t do anything without you.”

When he spoke honestly, pfft, a smile was barely drawn on Philius’s face.

“I’m a bit confused.”

“About what?”

“Whether to scold you for not taking meals properly, or to kiss you right now.”

Thinking that Jay skipping a meal and spending time here resembling the space in the dream was due to his absence, he wanted to kiss him right away.

“…Do it with a kiss.”

And Jay chose the correct answer. He lowered his head as if hiding his reddened face. It was soon that he touched Philius’s lips.

A calm kiss, fitting to say sharing rather than taking from each other, continued slowly.

Chuu, chuu. Intermittently ringing wet sounds completely calmed the wavering heart.

When he opened his closed eyes again, the vision became darker. Twilight had settled before he knew it.