Chapter 35: Standing Outside His Room.

Instead of sighing, I refilled Palmer’s empty cup with cold water. Palmer, who knew nothing about the synthetic diamond matter, emptied the cup in one go, perhaps feeling anxious about the recent diamond prices.

“Continue buying for now.”

“U-until when should I buy?”

Palmer, giving up on his own judgment, waited for the King’s Brother’s order.

“Until I enter my Rut.”

Last year, the King’s Brother’s Rut began exactly one year after the previous one.

And it ended exactly one week later.

It was to the point where one could say it had truly stabilized.

However, Palmer became even more nervous at the word ‘Rut’ coming from the King’s Brother’s lips.

“During the Rut period, just watch.”

“Yes, I, I will do as commanded.”

His hand gripping the cane was so tight it turned white.

His Adam’s apple bobbed as if swallowing dry saliva, and Palmer opened his mouth again with a very tense face.

“I, I am sorry to bring this up at such a time, but I have a request.”

“Speak.”

“My kn-knees can’t seem to hold up anymore, so I dare to request retirement.”

“Retirement?”

“Yes, I apologize.”

It was coincidental timing.

I didn’t know the details, but I heard Palmer was someone from the King’s Brother’s mother’s side and they had a long-standing relationship; he was a sincere person.

Like all merchants, exaggeration and whining were passive skills he carried around, but saying his knees weren’t good didn’t seem to be just whining.

He was quite large, and even in a sitting position, he was leaning forward to put his weight on the cane.

“I heard the news that your youngest passed the bar exam. Indeed, since your children are all grown, it’s time to think about retirement. Tell him congratulations, though it’s late.”

“Thank you.”

The person who was so tense when the King’s Brother mentioned the Rut bluntly wore a pleased smile upon hearing the congratulations for his youngest.

It seemed he had been forcibly holding back his desire to boast.

I felt a strange mood.

Because I remembered my father having a similar expression when my brother entered university and when he received his master’s degree.

Although he pretended not to, whenever he heard praises about his eldest son, he would readily pay for meals or drinks.

If I had received the admission notification from RISD without coming out, would my father have made such an expression when my story came up?

Still, it was a well-known university in the art world.

The short imagination soon found an answer.

Anyway, the past was something that had happened, and a future that could be changed did not exist.

I shook off the useless lingering regret by refilling Palmer’s empty cup again.

“Regarding your retirement, let’s talk again after my Rut ends. It won’t be an easy conversation. I don’t think I can find someone to replace you that quickly.”

Palmer, who had become noticeably tense again at the word ‘Rut’, relaxed his hand when the King’s Brother expressed his desire to stop his retirement.

Indeed, it must be satisfying for an employer to acknowledge one’s past contributions.

“So let’s see each other again later. After my Rut ends.”

Due to the King’s Brother deliberately mentioning the Rut again, the smile that was barely forming on Palmer’s lips hardened stiffly.

I had to suppress a chuckle.

****

“Are you going, to the Duke?”

The moment I finished my portion of the meal and was about to stand up, Ian asked in a hushed voice.

“Yes.”

As I nodded, Ian’s thin cheeks hardened.

Others nearby were the same.

The short conversation in small voices made them stop their actions.

My going to the King’s Brother now meant that the main building where the King’s Brother in Rut was and the annex where they were would be connected, even for a short time.

The day the King’s Brother’s Rut started was exactly as predicted.

Despite the fact that we could now say it had completely stabilized, silence still settled in the dining hall where servants gathered once a day.

“Shall I, go with you?”

“Why?”

It was such nonsense that I reacted reflexively, but Ian, perhaps taking my ‘why’ as a question, answered steadily.

“Because it might be, dangerous.”

It was utterly incomprehensible.

As I frowned and looked at Ian, he grabbed the knife he used for the meal, thinking something again.

Teaching him to use utensils since he tried to eat everything except stew with his bare hands was also my job these days.

The knife, which was awkward when cutting bread and bacon, began to spin rapidly.

The hand tricks kids did with cutter knives in high school were literally tricks.

The knife moving fast in Ian’s hand looked like it could actually stab something.

The unusual speed seemed not to give a mage clumsy in fighting time to chant a spell.

It looked sufficient to protect his body.

After demonstrating once, Ian showed a proud face.

“Kid, you really like that guy, don’t you?”

Perhaps because he caused a small disturbance amidst everyone’s tension, Sous-chef Jack said sarcastically.

Anyone could tell he wasn’t talking about simple friendly affection.

Ian, too big to be called a kid, turned pale at once.

“N-no. No, no. It’s not, like that.”

Ian shook his head turning pale.

After Tommy left the mansion, someone told me, “That guy hit on you because he liked you.”

Given the quite malicious face, the guy who spoke to me seemed to find me quite displeasing.

Even if traits like Alpha and Omega were criteria superior to physical gender, it seemed a Beta male having romantic feelings for a Beta male was taken as unusual.

He didn’t mean I was loved, but looked down upon.

Since that someone left the mansion shortly after, I’ve forgotten his name now.

“Really, it’s not. I just… the Duke’s order…”

Repeating ‘no’ rapidly like a machine gun, Ian suddenly shut his mouth tight again.

“I know it’s not. Go back and rest.”

The feeling Ian sends me is completely different from Tommy’s.

I soothed the guy standing frozen in place and sent him out of the dining hall.

Jack, who was about to say one more word, shut his mouth as I started packing food on the tray.

It seemed he remembered anew where I was heading from now.

Glancing at the head chef clicking his tongue at Jack who tried to relieve his twisted mood with unnecessary provocation, I left the dining hall.

On the door at the end of the corridor leading to the main building, an object familiar from seeing it every day for the past few days was hanging.

An envelope sealed with Count Umbra’s crest.

Just the fact that the entrance to the mansion was blocked was enough to know the King’s Brother had entered his Rut.

Sending letters continuously in a situation where the person involved couldn’t see or reply was no different from picking a one-sided fight.

And the one leading this was definitely the King.

I glared at the envelope balanced precariously on the doorknob.

This uselessly perfect sense of balance must be Butler Philip’s.

Eventually, what I had to do was set.

I picked up the envelope and placed it on one side of the tray.

Whether to see this letter or not was the King’s Brother’s choice.

I opened the heavy door and entered the main building.

Although the corridor was still dark, I didn’t hesitate to walk this familiar path now.

Even without a candle, I wouldn’t be groping in the air.

Because I remember the path with precise strides.

Standing in front of the King’s Brother’s bedroom door, I looked down at the tray I brought yesterday.

Estimating the King’s Brother’s food intake from the reduced amount of food, I confirmed that the same envelope as the one on the tray I was holding was lying with its seal unbroken.

I switched trays.

If I place this envelope received yesterday in the King’s Brother’s study, my work for today is done.

But I couldn’t move my steps.

I couldn’t knock on the King’s Brother’s bedroom door to announce my presence.

I couldn’t even say there were no new articles to read because the newspaper was filled only with war stories like yesterday.

I just, stood there.

“…Jay.”

When the King’s Brother called me, I couldn’t even breathe properly.

Afraid he might hear my breathing.

“You’re there, right? In front of the door.”

Clang, a sharp sound answered instead of me who couldn’t bring myself to speak.

It was the sound of the cleanly emptied coffee cup falling onto the silver tray.

“…You are.”

“……”

“Don’t go, stay.”

I put the rattling tray back down on the floor.

“Right now.”

“……”

“…Please.”

Because the King’s Brother pleaded, I couldn’t raise my bowed body again.

I didn’t answer anything, but the King’s Brother’s voice wasn’t heard again.

As if he knew I couldn’t move from here, in front of his door.

In two days, the King’s Brother will open this door and come out.

Just like the last Rut.

He will handle the work piled up for a week nonchalantly and say he needs more coffee.

The impertinent servant, I, will hand him herbal tea instead of coffee since he already drank three cups.

The King’s Brother will raise an eyebrow once, but eventually drink herbal tea instead of coffee.

Saying he’s grateful I didn’t give him cocoa.

Still, right now, I was angry at the people who still treated the King’s Brother in Rut as a monster.

At the King playing childish tricks when the King’s Brother couldn’t respond, and at myself who had to deliver that.

It wasn’t an emotion I should have.

Because I am also just someone trying to distance myself from him eventually.

The King’s Brother’s breathing was calming down little by little.

It seemed the pain had subsided for a moment.

Listening to the gradually lengthening breathing, I thought it would be better to leave this mansion and enter university next year, when I turn eighteen, as he said.

Although I have no passion for new learning nor expectation for meeting strangers, it will still be another ordinary daily life.

When the interval of breathing became constant as if the King’s Brother fell completely asleep, I raised my stiff body.

Even without light, I can go back this way.

When I took one step forward, I had no choice but to turn back again.

A roaring boom! and the sharp noise of breaking glass tied my feet.