Chapter 44: Left Out of the Team

As soon as Yeo Hyun-tae stepped forward, a staff member quickly approached and handed him a microphone and a sticker.

“Please tell us which position and mission song Trainee Yeo Hyun-tae wishes to participate in.”

“I will choose ‘All the winners’ from the dance position.”

He then approached the panel labeled ‘All the winners’, attached the sticker with his name on it, and returned.

As Yeo Hyun-tae returned to his spot, the next rank, Lee Chan-seo, was called out.

After eight stickers had been attached to each respective panel, it was his turn.

When asked which song he would choose, he answered, ‘A Letter’.

Son Chae-i smiled with a satisfied expression and nodded.

On his way back after attaching the sticker to the panel, his eyes met Son Chae-i’s, and she gave him a subtle wink.

It seemed like a gesture meaning he had chosen well.

Because ‘A Letter’ was Son Chae-i’s song.

***

“I will choose ‘Love Story’ from the rap position.”

With the last participant’s mission song selection finished, Son Chae-i left a message for everyone to work hard and went down from the stage.

Since those who chose the same song needed to gather and decide on the center and parts, he approached the panel labeled ‘A Letter’.

‘Nam Jin-wook’, ‘Sim Jae-seo’, ‘Park Seo-hu’, ‘Bae Jae-hyung’, ‘Hwang Sung-min’

After checking the stickers attached to the panel and looking around for the owners of the names, he felt someone tap his back from behind.

Turning his head, he saw Park Seo-hu, one of the people he was looking for, standing there.

“Looking for me?”

That was correct, but perhaps because his attitude was a bit off, an answer didn’t come easily.

And….

Why is this guy speaking so casually?

“The rest are over there.

Let’s go.”

Meeting his equally prickly gaze, Park Seo-hu pulled his arm with a nonchalant face.

It seemed his tone was just like that, not that he was being deliberately prickly.

His resistance fading, he was being pulled along by Park Seo-hu when Park Seo-hu suddenly frowned deeply and muttered something almost like a curse, “Ah, shit.”

“Ah, not you.”

He quickly turned to look at him and added, then frowned again facing forward.

Following Park Seo-hu’s gaze, he saw three participants gathered and talking.

“Huh?

Seo-hu hyung, and….”

One of the three spotted Park Seo-hu and spoke first, then trailed off seeing Jae-seo standing next to him.

He then looked Jae-seo up and down once, and soon smiled and greeted him, “Hey.”

“Jae-seo, you’re on our team.”

Though he tried to act like it was nothing, Jae-seo could subtly sense he wasn’t too pleased about it.

Thinking this week might be a bit long, he turned his head and coincidentally, his eyes met Seo Jun-jae’s exactly.

Facing that smile he’d grown used to from just one week of practicing together, he thought.

It would probably be more comfortable being alone with Seo Jun-jae than this.

“You all know the song, right?”

At Nam Jin-wook’s question, Bae Jae-hyung and Hwang Sung-min shook their heads.

For the two who didn’t know the song, they played ‘A Letter’ on a tablet PC borrowed from the production team, then looked down at the lyric sheet with the parts divided.

The situation was a bit different from when they decided parts in the ‘July Snow’ team last time.

First, he had resolved to try a bit harder.

And perhaps thanks to that one experience, he could now discern, to some extent, which part might suit him better.

Maybe that’s why, while listening to the song, the part marked ‘Vocal 2’ kept catching his eye.

“Then shall we decide the center first?”

Nam Jin-wook, who had stopped the song at the last accompaniment, raised a pen and asked, then suddenly made an “Ah” sound.

“I’m the oldest, so can I be the leader?”

It would save time too, he added.

At that, Bae Jae-hyung and Hwang Sung-min, sitting on either side of Nam Jin-wook, nodded excessively, fawning.

“Hey!

Who else could be leader but Jin-wook hyung, right?”

“Of course, we just need to trust and follow hyung!”

Watching them patting each other on the back, Nam Jin-wook shifted his gaze to Jae-seo and Park Seo-hu.

Meeting his eyes that seemed to ask, ‘Is that okay?’, Jae-seo nodded.

Anyway, the leader wasn’t a role he wanted or could do, so it didn’t matter.

Park Seo-hu seemed to feel the same.

“Since we’re a vocal team, the center is the main vocal, right?”

Bae Jae-hyung, who spoke first, subtly glanced at Nam Jin-wook, then abruptly turned his head towards Jae-seo and Park Seo-hu and asked, “How about Jin-wook hyung doing it?”

At that question, Jae-seo instinctively looked at Park Seo-hu.

The main vocal should be the person who sings best, and if so, in their team, shouldn’t it obviously be Park Seo-hu?

Feeling his gaze, Park Seo-hu turned his head and shook his head with an expression that said no.

He couldn very well insist when Seo-hu himself said he didn’t want to, so he nodded to show he understood.

Nam Jin-wook asked again if he really could do it.

He hadn’t nodded to Nam Jin-wook, but since Park Seo-hu said he wouldn’t do it, it seemed right for Nam Jin-wook to do it, so he answered that he should.

“Thanks.

I’ll work hard for the team.”

They applauded for Nam Jin-wook as he attached the center sticker, then looked down at the lyric sheet.

Next was the turn to pick Vocal 1.

Since it wasn’t the main vocal but still carried many important parts, he glanced at Park Seo-hu again.

“Vocal 1 is—”

“I want to do it!”

Park Seo-hu didn’t open his mouth.

Turning his head towards the sound, Bae Jae-hyung had his hand raised high.

Having no particularly memorable stages, he didn’t seem like a participant who had stood out much, so Jae-seo thought Park Seo-hu should do it.

But again, Park Seo-hu didn’t step forward.

From the moment Bae Jae-hyung took Vocal 1, he started to worry if this team was really going to be okay.

“Anyone want Vocal 2?”

While Park Seo-hu still had no role, he hesitated, wondering if it was right for him to say he wanted it, but then raised his hand.

He did genuinely want the Vocal 2 part the most, so he thought he should at least try.

“What about Seo-hu?”

“Right.

Seo-hu hyung seems like he’d suit it too, why don’t you sing it?”

Hwang Sung-min, who had been quiet until then, started, and Bae Jae-hyung seamlessly continued.

It was true Park Seo-hu’s skill was far superior to his, so maybe they were being sincere, but it felt strangely uncomfortable.

“Then shall both of you sing it once?”

As Nam Jin-wook finished speaking, Park Seo-hu began singing the Vocal 2 part.

Having basic skill, he sang it well, of course, but strangely, it felt like there was no sincerity in it.

The way he sang it so half-heartedly made Jae-seo worry again if this team was really going to be okay.

“Next, Jae-seo, will you sing it?”

“Ah, yes.”

Answering Nam Jin-wook, he sang the same part Park Seo-hu had just sung.

He didn’t know if he sang it better than Park Seo-hu, who had sung it carelessly, but at least he sang it earnestly, and even he thought it wasn’t bad.

“Then we’ll discuss among ourselves for a bit.”

While he and Park Seo-hu had their heads down, he heard rustling sounds, and then at the words that a decision had been made, he raised his head.

“Um, Seo-hu got two votes, so it’s decided he’ll do Vocal 2.”

It would be a lie to say he wasn’t disappointed, as this was the first time since entering this program, or this game, that he had felt greedy and wanted something.

But this was a survival show, and it was right for the better person to do it.

So, just to show he accepted it, he only nodded.

“Shall we take a short break?”

After all the parts were decided, Nam Jin-wook suggested they go to the bathroom or something and left the hall with Bae Jae-hyung and Hwang Sung-min.

Thinking he might as well practice his part, he spread out the lyric sheet.

Park Seo-hu next to him tapped his shoulder.

“Come outside with me for a sec.”

Seeing Park Seo-hu get up without even waiting for an answer, he swallowed the sigh that wanted to escape and got up.

Following Park Seo-hu, who headed straight outside, they soon arrived behind the building.

Just as he was about to ask what he wanted to say by coming all the way here—

“f*ck, those assholes.”

At the sudden curse, he instinctively turned his head to look around.

As if reading his mind worrying about cameras around, Park Seo-hu shook his head vigorously.

“There aren’t any.

I’ve been cussing here since the first filming, and it’s never aired.”

…Well, that’s bold.

“Hey, you know you’re a total pushover, right?”

Wondering if he’d been brought to this camera-less place to pick a fight, he was dumbfounded and about to turn away without responding.

Park Seo-hu suddenly asked why he had stayed quiet earlier.

Not understanding what he meant, he asked back, “Huh?”

Park Seo-hu let out a long, impatient sigh and opened his mouth again.

“Do you really not know, or are you pretending not to?

You sang way better than me earlier, for Vocal 2!”

At Park Seo-hu’s words, he let out a stupid “Ah.”

He had wondered why Seo-hu sang with so little effort, and it seemed he really had sung half-heartedly on purpose.

As things stood, the only way he could sing better than Park Seo-hu was if Park Seo-hu deliberately sang badly.

“You know those three are from the same agency, right?”

That explained it.

No wonder they were so perfectly in sync.

“They pretend not to, but they subtly push each other.

It was like that when I was in the same grade as them, and I heard it was the same in the 1st contest team with Nam Jin-wook and Bae Jae-hyung.

I’m close with Lee Ha-jin, you know?”

Lee Ha-jin was the participant who stood out the most in Nam Jin-wook’s team during the 1st contest.

He remembered there was a lot of talk about why Lee Ha-jin wasn’t the center.

So, was that why?

“I’m 16th place this time, so honestly, I don’t know if I can rise further and debut.

Anyway, I probably won’t get eliminated right away, so it’s a shame, but I’m thinking of just taking it easy.

I hate being entangled with them.”

He added that he felt bad about seeming to take the Vocal 2 spot, so he thought he’d let him know, then turned and left first.

Staring blankly at Park Seo-hu’s back as he walked back towards the building, he let out a short breath, “Phew.”

“This is a bit, annoying.”

He raised his hand and ran it through his hair.

The fact that he had been intentionally excluded despite doing well, not because he was lacking, kept making his blood boil.

He roughly shook his hand, messing up his hair, bit his lip, and then started walking.

Before returning to the hall, he stopped by the bathroom to wash his hands.

Through the suddenly opened door, his eyes met Seo Jun-jae’s.

Seo Jun-jae, who had been greeting him as usual as he entered, suddenly stopped moving and tilted his head.

“What’s hard?”

Turning off the faucet and pulling out a paper towel to dry his hands, he started, “Seo Jun-jae.”

Running into Seo Jun-jae by chance, a question occurred to him.

It was a question he could ask because it was Seo Jun-jae.

“If someone stops you from doing what you want, what do you do?”

Turning to meet Seo Jun-jae’s gaze, the corners of his eyes curved deeply downwards.

“I do it, somehow.”

“What if you’re in a situation where you can’t?”

At his provocation, Seo Jun-jae wiped all the expressions off his face at once and made an expression he had never seen before.

Even though he didn’t know Seo Jun-jae well, it felt strangely, for the first time, like he was seeing Seo Jun-jae’s real face.

“Then you have to win by being good.”

Seo Jun-jae, who had already put his usual smile back on, approached him and whispered quietly in his ear, “Nam Jin-wook?”

He hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

Seo Jun-jae let out a low laugh and slowly opened his mouth.

“Then go and win.”

Meeting his steady gaze, he nodded as if entranced.

Go and win—behind the seemingly childish phrase, that single word ‘go’ made his heart feel strangely at ease.

He let out an involuntary snort and opened his mouth.

“Yeah, I’ll go and do well.”

***

At 9 PM, after the official practice time ended, he decided to stay alone in the practice room.

When he didn’t get up and instead pulled out his lyric sheet, Park Seo-hu looked back at him with a questioning expression.

Meeting his composed eyes, Seo-hu seemed to understand why he was staying, frowned as if dumbfounded, and walked out of the practice room.

He spread out the lyric sheet and checked his part, ‘Vocal 4’.

Actually, the number next to the position indicator meant that the larger the number, the smaller the role.

In a 5-person team, being assigned Vocal 4 apart from the main vocal meant his role in this team was the smallest.

The fewest parts, and no particularly attention-grabbing moments either.

Just as he picked up his pen, pondering how to make something of this—

“Ah, shit….”

The door burst open and Park Seo-hu, his face full of dissatisfaction, walked into the practice room.

Stomping his feet almost, he came over, let out a deep sigh, plopped down across from him, and pulled out his own lyric sheet.

“Why did you come back?”

“My pride hurts.”

…What?

Frowning at him for suddenly barging in and saying incomprehensible things, Park Seo-hu met his glare and continued.

“I gave up, but seeing you like this, my pride is too hurt.”

So he said he’d do it together, then hunched over towards the lyric sheet.

He started humming his part, even underlining the lyrics marked ‘Vocal 4’.

Watching him, a teasing remark slipped out.

“In this case, I guess I’m the one you’re doing it with.”

At his words, Park Seo-hu squawked and started cursing him out.

Watching him, Jae-seo suddenly thought of Ha Jin-woo and Lee Woo-rim.

…Is this how they felt when they teased me?

***

Except for the times they practiced together as a group, he practiced separately with Park Seo-hu.

Just like the comment ‘definite main vocal pick’ under every Please Take Care of My Idol clip, Park Seo-hu’s skill was truly outstanding.

Not only could he sing well himself, but he also had extensive musical knowledge and sense, so he was a huge help as Jae-seo struggled with how to make his short, insignificant part shine.

‘Hey, that vibrato is terrible.’

‘What are you doing?

Drop the note harder!’

His tone was harsh, but whenever Jae-seo did something, he was eager to teach him one more thing and fix him.

Thanks to him, by the time of the trainer session, he had managed to make his seemingly insignificant parts sound decent.

And soon after, when the vocal lesson began and Won Ju-ha and Moon Gi-hoon heard their team’s song, they made ambiguous expressions.

Won Ju-ha kept flipping through papers as if checking something, and Moon Gi-hoon just sucked in air, then slowly opened his mouth.

“Hmm, it’s not bad….”

“I think it is bad.”

Won Ju-ha spat out a cold voice, cutting off Moon Gi-hoon.

“Compared to the 1st contest level, it’s not bad.

But you guys came here for the vocal position, right?

Right now, it doesn’t feel like vocals at all.”

Moon Gi-hoon, who had been trying to choose his words saying it wasn’t bad, also sighed and nodded in agreement, then continued.

“Did you end up in vocals because the other positions were full by any chance?”

No one could answer Moon Gi-hoon’s question.

Of course not.

Everyone had chosen the vocal position and this song when they had other options available.

Meanwhile, Won Ju-ha, who had been looking at the papers again, lifted her head with a clearly displeased expression.

Biting her lip as if holding back anger, she slowly closed and opened her eyes, then spoke.

“Do you guys have no intention of saving the team at all?”

Then she called out, “Center.”

Pointing at Nam Jin-wook, who raised his hand, she listed the main vocal part lyrics and told him to sing it.

As Nam Jin-wook started singing that part, Won Ju-ha let out a hollow laugh and swept her hair back from her forehead.

“Seo-hu, sing the same part.”

Before Nam Jin-wook’s song even finished, Won Ju-ha tilted her chin towards Park Seo-hu and said.

After hesitating for a moment, Park Seo-hu sang the same part Nam Jin-wook had just sung.

Won Ju-ha clicked her tongue.

When Park Seo-hu finished singing, Moon Gi-hoon, who had been listening quietly, opened his mouth.

“Who was it that took Vocal 1?”

When Bae Jae-hyung cautiously raised his hand, Moon Gi-hoon told him to sing the Vocal 1 part from the second verse.

As Bae Jae-hyung started singing, Moon Gi-hoon frowned and raised his hand.

“Match the pitch.”

Flustered at that, watching Bae Jae-hyung start to fumble, Moon Gi-hoon sighed quietly and waved his hand for him to stop.

“Are you guys really going to go on like this?”

As no one could answer, Won Ju-ha crossed her arms and continued.

“I’ll give you a little time, so think carefully about what would be better for the team.”

Practically kicked out of the practice room, they gathered in the hallway.

Nam Jin-wook and Bae Jae-hyung, whose skills had been pointed out, looked visibly upset, and Hwang Sung-min was watching them both cautiously.

Park Seo-hu, also being a party involved, seemed hesitant to speak, so in the end, Jae-seo had to step up.

Swallowing a sigh, he opened his mouth.

“Since the teachers said that much, wouldn’t it be better to change things?”

The four people’s gazes converged on him.

Receiving their subtly sharp stares, he steadfastly continued.

Partly it was gratitude for Park Seo-hu’s help, and partly he couldn’t help but find the others distasteful, but more than that, as Won Ju-ha said, to present a decent stage as a team, they absolutely had to change the parts.

No, it shouldn’t have been arranged like this in the first place.

“I want to change.”

Speaking with a firmer voice, Nam Jin-wook slowly nodded.

“Yeah, I think that’s right too.”

He then requested the production team to return the paper with each person’s position.

On the returned paper, he scratched a line over his own name in the main vocal slot and instead wrote Park Seo-hu’s name.

“Ah, and Vocal 1 too.”

Since it seemed unlikely they’d have a good relationship anyway, he had to fully take the lead for the stage’s completeness.

At his words, Nam Jin-wook, who had also drawn a line over Bae Jae-hyung’s name, looked up at him.

With eyes that seemed to ask what he wanted to do now, Jae-seo continued.

“I think Jin-wook hyung should do Vocal 1, and Jae-hyung hyung should do Vocal 2.”

Hwang Sung-min, who had Vocal 3, wasn’t cut out for Vocal 1, and he was quite satisfied with his already developed Vocal 4 part, so the choice was one.

At his answer, Nam Jin-wook looked at him with surprised eyes.

He must have thought Jae-seo would insist on taking Vocal 2 now that everyone’s positions were being shuffled.