Chapter 14: Thirteen Days

He really came out carrying a heap of white blankets, arms spread wide as if hugging them.

Then he nudged my side with his knee.

“Hyung. You need to lie on top of it.”

“Just give me something to cover with.”

“No. Move.”

Because Jeongwon stubbornly insisted on laying it out properly, I slowly got up.

With deft hands, he spread a thick topper over the sofa and laid the blanket on top.

I lay down straight, resting my head on the pillow and pulling the blanket over myself.

The way it sank wherever I pressed felt like one of those feather duvets you only get in hotels.

I rubbed my cheek against it, then lazily waved a hand at Jeongwon standing by my head.

“Don’t wake me up until I wake up on my own tomorrow.”

“Okay. Want an eye mask?”

“If you have one.”

I wasn’t trying to be picky, but if he was offering, there was no reason to refuse.

Since my sleep schedule was always a mess, an eye mask had long become essential if I wanted proper rest.

As soon as I put it on, everything went dark.

And my consciousness was just about to follow.

I thought he would leave for his room, but I could feel him still nearby.

Soon, there was the soft rustle of fabric, and then his voice came close to my ear.

“Hyung.”

“…Yeah.”

“Do you know how many days it’s been?”

“…What?”

“You don’t know?”

His presence moved even closer.

I felt his breath brush against my cheek—

and then something touched my lips.

I couldn’t see, but I knew what that brief warmth was.

I pushed the eye mask up to my forehead and turned to look.

I didn’t know what kind of expression I had, but I knew his.

It wasn’t the face of the younger one who had just asked about my retirement.

It was that same unfamiliar expression from earlier—when he’d been waiting for me outside the bathroom.

The one that lingered in the dim light.

It was Jeongwon who ended that moment.

With his long fingers, he pulled the eye mask back down over my eyes.

My vision was cut off again, and only his voice remained.

“It’s been thirteen days, so I’ll stop here.”

“…Jeongwon.”

“Yes.”

“Are you serious about that?”

“That?”

He echoed the question, but before I could answer, he cut in.

“Yeah. I am.”

“……”

“I won’t do anything else. Sleep well.”

Soon, his footsteps faded into the distance.

When I heard the door close, everything went completely quiet.

I couldn’t tell whether the darkness in front of me was because of the eye mask—

or because my future itself had gone dark.

I wanted to think about it a little more, but sleep swallowed me faster.

My eyelids fluttered once or twice beneath the mask before I shut my eyes tightly as a faint tingling ran behind them.

The blanket wrapped around me like feathers, trapping my body heat and making me feel warm and safe.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t worried about Jeongwon’s unpredictable behavior.

But—

The next thing I knew, light was seeping in through the crooked edge of the eye mask.

My neck, bent to one side, felt stiff.

When I took off the mask and opened my eyes, the living room was bright.

Sunlight poured in beneath the half-lowered blinds, warming my cheek.

I sat up from the sinking sofa and rolled my neck side to side.

Bones cracked as I moved.

When I turned my neck to the left, all the muscles pulled painfully.

Did I get a crick?

I hunched over awkwardly on the sofa, groaning.

I rubbed my left shoulder with my right hand and got up sluggishly.

The blinds were some kind of automatic system—hard to adjust.

After staring blankly out the window for a while, I walked across the living room.

Maybe Jeongwon was awake.

I wanted to ask him to lower the blinds.

Standing in front of the door I had used last night, I noticed it was slightly open.

I pushed it open quietly and stepped inside.

The curtains were drawn, leaving the room dim.

There was only a bed.

Well, there were a few things scattered on the floor—bags and clothes Jeongwon sometimes carried around.

But still, for a place he lived in, even if it was just a temporary apartment, it felt too bare.

Jeongwon lay on his side under a thin white blanket.

Even through the thin fabric, the long outline of his body from his ankles upward was visible.

It didn’t look like he was wearing much.

I sat carefully on the edge of the wide bed and pressed down on the mattress.

It was just a bare mattress—no sheets at all.

Where did the bedding go? Why sleep like this?

Though… it did seem like a good one.

Lowering my head, I stared at his sleeping face.

There was still a trace of the boyish look from back when we used to share a room in the dorm.

And yet… not quite.

Even if it wasn’t the same anymore, every time I looked at him, I’d think of those days.

His neck was bent awkwardly too, so I gently slipped a hand under it and adjusted his position.

The lips that had said all kinds of things last night were now tightly closed.

As I watched his steady breathing, his eyelids fluttered.

Before I could move away, his eyes opened slightly and met mine.

They were unfocused.

“Jeongwon. You’re awake?”

“……”

Like someone sleep-talking, he reached out.

Then he shifted his upper body closer, leaning against me.

His head came to rest on my thigh.

And he nuzzled into it.

The warmth of his soft skin spread through my leg.

I froze in place.

His arms wrapped around my waist tightly—

and then slowly loosened.

He slipped back into sleep.

I stared at the back of his head as he lay there again.

Lifting my hand, I ran my fingers through his hair.

It slid softly between them.

Hearing his even breathing, I knew he was truly asleep.

Carefully, I got up.

I gently held his cheek and eased my leg out.

Pulling the thin blanket over his back, I left the room.

I hadn’t gone in thinking anything of it, but my face felt hot.

Why was his sleep-talking like that?

At this rate, something serious might happen.

With pointless thoughts running through my head, I walked out.

After fiddling with the blinds, I somehow managed to lower them all the way down.

The living room darkened again.

I buried myself back under the blanket Jeongwon had given me.

Breathing in the faint scent of fabric, I pulled it over my head.

He could’ve just given me a blanket.

Why go through the trouble of bringing out the topper too?

I fell asleep again.

I woke up once more to faint voices.

As I pulled the blanket back over my head, the voices abruptly stopped.

So I rubbed my eyes and pushed the blanket away.

Using my arms, I slowly pushed myself up.

The living room was still dark.

The blinds were now completely lowered.

The clock on the wall read 3 PM.

Time to wash up and head straight to the practice room.

As I staggered to my feet, our manager suddenly appeared from the kitchen.

I stared blankly as he walked over and ruffled my hair roughly.

Annoyed, I tried to shake his hand off.

“Let go.”

“What’s with your hair?”

“I’ll wash it. Why are you here?”

“I came to ask Jeongwon something. Why did you sleep here?”

“I dropped him off last night and got too sleepy.”

“I heard from Hyuk that you said you’d go on your own.”

“…Yeah. I regretted that later.”

As I yawned widely and stretched, he handed me something.

Looking down, it was a cup filled with something like green juice.

I took a sip and immediately grimaced.

Jeongwon came out of the room, glanced at my face, and took the cup from my hand.

His hair was still damp, droplets falling from the back of his neck.

I reached out and wiped the water from his nape.

“You actually like this?”

“If it’s there, I drink it.”

“Drink a lot of it.”

“You drink it too.”

“No thanks.”

When I refused again, he let out a small laugh and brought the cup back to his lips.

Bitter medicine I could handle.

But that weird taste? That was harder to swallow.

As I nodded and headed to the bathroom, something suddenly crossed my mind.

I turned back.

“What were you talking about earlier?”

“What?”

“I think I heard my name.”

“Must’ve imagined it. Go wash up and wake properly.”

Jeongwon ignored me and kept drinking.

The manager disappeared into another room.

The album jacket shoot was at a warehouse on the outskirts of Seoul.

I had only vaguely remembered the address, so I checked it again this morning.

At first, I thought my phone ringing was just an alarm.

But it kept going.

I buried my head, covered my ears with a pillow—

but eventually gave in.

Dragging myself down, I checked my phone.

It was my manager.

I answered and lay back on the bed.

“What?”

—Jaehya, I think I’ll be late and can’t pick you up. Can you come on your own?

“…Oh. Really? Don’t I need to go to the shop first?”

—You can do it here. Can’t you manage? Want me to come?

“No. I’m not a kid. I’ll get there.”

After apologizing repeatedly, he hung up.

I tossed the phone back down beside the bed.

Spreading my arms out, I lay there and closed my eyes again.

Deep breath in.

Out.

Relax my neck…

Yeah, no.

I was fully awake now.

After twisting my stiff neck a few times, I got up.

Maybe cold water would help.

I opened a bottle from the fridge and drank.

The chill cut straight through my chest.

I grimaced, then relaxed my face, standing there blankly.

I stared at my feet for a moment before putting the bottle back.

Did he tell the other members to come on their own too?

Even thinking about that right now—

I hated myself the most.