Chapter 17: The First Meeting of the Second Life

Ahnok bit his lip and moved forward.

Perhaps because it was past noon, the sunlight beat down languidly upon the heads of the travelers. In the distance, the long perimeter wall and the prominent main gate of the Prince of Myeong’s residence came into view.

It was the moment where the reality of living two lives finally hit home.

He had come here again. Not as the Consort of Myeong, nor the Crown Princess, nor the Empress—but as Ahnok of the Seol family. However, this time, he would not become Yeo Jae-won’s person.

In his past life, he had never truly been anything to Yeo Jae-won. His place had always been by the man’s side, but it was a place in name only. Yeo Jae-won never bestowed any meaning upon the Ahnok he kept beside him.

Had it been otherwise, he could not have been so heartless toward their child. He could not have remained so composed and unaffected in the face of the boy’s death.

In this life, he would be nothing to Yeo Jae-won. This was Ahnok’s absolute choice. He would not engage in the foolishness of being discouraged by a lack of affection, only to resign himself to a life where he didn’t even dare to hope.

He would thoroughly ignore everything and run away. Whether a grand destiny trampled Baekya-bu or crushed the Myeong residence, he would not interfere.

“Are you Master Ahnok from Baekya-bu? I am Court Lady Lee, in service to His Highness the Prince of Myeong.”

Standing before the plaque of the residence, Court Lady Lee approached and spoke to him, exactly as she had in his previous life.

Ahnok, who had frozen in his past life with a furrowed brow, instead let the corners of his mouth lift slightly.

When the mournful-faced youth, clad in light blue like a forget-me-not, smiled, his impression changed entirely. He looked like a white water lily blooming shyly after sunset. Court Lady Lee stared at him as if momentarily entranced before hurriedly lowering her eyes.

Ahnok crossed the threshold with a relaxed stride. Court Lady Lee recited the plan: Ahnok would stay in the detached annex for the time being to learn Imperial etiquette.

Though he could recite the layout of this residence with his eyes closed, Ahnok followed her with a calm heart.

Upon reaching the front courtyard of the annex, Ahnok already knew who Court Lady Lee was about to introduce. As the sound of murmuring voices reached them, a woman appeared slowly. It was Court Lady Cho, the discipline mistress, an official with a fierce expression dressed in deep navy.

“Court Lady Cho offers her greetings to Master Ahnok.”

In his past life, Ahnok had bowed in return and used polite honorifics; in response, Court Lady Cho had scolded him in a sharp tone, as if testing his strength.

This time, Ahnok stared blankly at Court Lady Cho for a moment, then simply gave a small, brief nod. Court Lady Cho, who had intended to find fault with even his smallest gesture, struggled to hide her slight fluster.

Thinking back to the days of her harsh discipline still made his head throb. Thanks to her, he had mastered Imperial etiquette perfectly, but that didn’t mean his memories of those days were beautified in the slightest.

Furthermore, while Court Lady Cho served the young Second Empress on the surface, she was secretly taking bribes from Noble Consort Sa. It was Court Lady Cho who, under the Consort’s orders, had forced Ahnok to drink a decoction to induce his heat cycle early in his previous life.

Sensing a chilly atmosphere between the two, Court Lady Lee stepped forward.

“His Highness has just returned home. He is waiting for you, so I shall escort you to the main building.”

Because of the delay caused by the young thief, he was being summoned immediately. Ahnok took a brief look at the exterior of the annex he hadn’t even set foot in yet and turned around.

In a spot where Ahnok’s gaze failed to reach, a pear tree sapling, planted not long ago, sat quietly.

In terms of sheer time, he had spent longer in the Eastern Palace and the Imperial Palace than in the Myeong residence. Nevertheless, the Myeong residence was the space most familiar to him. It was the first place he had adapted to after coming to the capital.

Many things had happened while staying here.

He had been married and then neglected on his wedding night. He had been scolded until he cried by Court Lady Cho while learning etiquette, and he had learned how to ride a horse. And… he had gazed upon Yeo Jae-won more freely here than anywhere else.

Though he had been neglected, Ahnok had unfailingly visited the main building whenever Yeo Jae-won was preparing for court to help him dress. He had even separately learned how to assist with robes from the court ladies of the Imperial Palace.

Because Yeo Jae-won was tall and handsome, everything looked good on him; after smoothing his collar a few times, the young Ahnok of that time would beam with a silly smile, overwhelmed with love for his husband. Meanwhile, Yeo Jae-won would simply turn away with a blank face, leaving nothing but a formal “thank you.”

Perhaps even then, he knew his love would not be returned. The weight, depth, shape, and nature of his heart were different from Yeo Jae-won’s. It had been that way from the starting line.

Arriving before the Jeong-bang, the grand main building, Eunuch Seok approached them. In his final memories, the man was called “Master Great Eunuch.”

“I offer my greetings to Master Ahnok. I am Eunuch Seok, in service to His Highness.”

Compared to his final memory of a man covered in wrinkles, he looked remarkably young. Over the last seven years, it seemed the eunuch’s life had also been quite taxing.

Unlike the last time, when he had been so flustered by Court Lady Cho’s shouting that he barely accepted the greeting, Ahnok slowly closed and opened his eyes, giving a single, composed nod.

Though they didn’t show it, Eunuch Seok, Court Lady Lee, and even Court Lady Cho were significantly surprised.

Even a daughter or son of a powerful family in the capital, trained their entire life for the Imperial Family, could not be this poised. Usually, even they would freeze or be nervous when facing a direct member of the Imperial Family for the first time—yet here was a mere bastard from the distant land of Baekya-bu, carrying himself with such grace.

In the eyes of the capital, Baekya-bu was a humble, backward countryside. Those who had internally looked down on Ahnok for his origins suddenly found themselves acting with involuntary caution in the face of his untouchable aura.

“I will lead you inside.”

After exchanging a glance with Court Lady Lee, Eunuch Seok guided Ahnok inside.

Since it was a space he had entered countless times, he wasn’t curious. He also didn’t want to leave a clumsy impression by looking around aimlessly. Ahnok kept his neck straight and walked with a quiet but weighted dignity, just as he had when living in the Imperial Palace.

Before the last of the many opening doors, Ahnok stopped. He waited for Eunuch Seok to announce him and receive permission.

Once he crossed this door, the twenty-seven-year-old Yeo Jae-won would be there.

What had his face looked like the last time he saw him? Was his tone sharp when he said the Prince’s memorial tablet had to be moved to the Ancestral Shrine? Or did he just seem fed up…?

One thing was certain: Ahnok had resented him.

If only you had come a little sooner… we could have been together just a little longer.

Clenching his fists before he realized it, Ahnok shook his head. He would do as he pleased now. He would not crave a place by Yeo Jae-won’s side, nor would he crave his heart.

“….”

Finally, the last door opened. Ahnok, who had been bowing his head while Eunuch Seok sought permission, lifted his gaze. With his chin slightly tilted, he looked almost haughty.

The first thing he saw was a broad back clad in a dark purple official robe. The restrained aesthetic of the garment suited Yeo Jae-won perfectly.

Despite all his resolve, the moment he saw him, Ahnok reflexively held his breath.

In truth, it hadn’t been that long since he’d seen him. From the perspective of Ahnok’s memories, not even a month had passed.

And yet, that month felt like an eternity.

Was it because they were meeting again across the span of a lifetime? Was it because his heart then and his heart now were not the same? Or was it because he had vowed… never to hold this man in his heart again?

Yet, how could he explain this heart, throbbing so vividly? What was he to do with this heart that beat uncontrollably when faced with the thing it had desired most?

“…Ahnok?”

—Ahnok…!

He still had to lift his head slightly to meet the man’s eyes. Those deep, black eyes like an immeasurable abyss were the same. So was the deep, resonant bass of the voice that pronounced his name.

Everything was the same. Everything… was the man he had loved. Over the voice calling his name, the voice he had heard in the final moments of his past life overlapped.

Had he truly called out to catch him?

…No, that was impossible.

To Yeo Jae-won, he was a person whose presence or absence mattered not. There was no way he would have tried to catch him. Swallowing a self-mocking laugh, Ahnok forced his expression into a mask.

Even if he crumbled, he was more confident than anyone in not showing his knees buckling. That was one of the few things Yeo Jae-won had ever wanted from him.

Ahnok reminded himself of why he was here. He hadn’t come to be shaken by seeing Yeo Jae-won. He had come to escape him. He had already imagined this reunion countless times. He couldn’t let his plans fall apart just because he was standing before him.

Even if he trembled, even if he was afraid and nervous, he had practiced saying what he needed to say. It was no different just because it was Yeo Jae-won.

Ahnok swallowed hard and bowed his head.

“Seol Ahnok of Baekya-bu offers his greetings to His Highness the Prince of Myeong.”