Chapter 59: Unspoken Truths

When Anok finally opened his eyes, having snapped out of a profound slumber with the sudden realization that now was not the time to be sleeping, the first thing that greeted his senses was the quiet, darkness-shrouded room inside Wunyeong-dang.

Only then did the last clear memory resurface. On his way back from Jeongan Palace, he had fallen into a deep drowse inside the carriage.

He had dreamed of his nameless child, lost himself in self-loathing over the agonizing grief, and ultimately made a complete spectacle of himself before his court attendants. And despite knowing his own body was burning with fever, he had refused to summon a physician before collapsing into sleep.

“Ha……”

Releasing a heavy sigh laden with bitter regret, Anok attempted to push himself up, only to realize that his right wrist was being firmly held by a weighty grip.

Turning his head toward the sensation, his eyes landed on a broad, imposing hand. The owner of that familiar hand was none other than Yeo Jae-won.

Just as he had done in the black swamp of his dream, Yeo Jae-won was holding onto Anok’s wrist with an unyielding grip. He was hunched over awkwardly on a low, small chair that barely matched the height of the bed’s edge, looking terribly uncomfortable, yet he had not let go even in his sleep.

Anok attempted to slide his wrist out of Yeo Jae-won’s grasp, but at the sudden tightening of the man’s grip, he let out a soft sigh and settled for leaning his upper body up. As he leaned closer toward Yeo Jae-won, he was met with the striking, handsome face of the prince, framed by long, neatly resting eyelashes.

“Your Highness.”

Anok intended to call out in his normal voice, but their sheer proximity naturally softened his tone. As his words bordered on a soft whisper, a subtle tickle rose in his chest, prompting Anok to pull back his head slightly.

How deeply is he asleep? He is usually so sharp that even a whisper like this would wake him instantly……

Anok tilted his head in quiet wonder.

“Your Highness……?”

Still, there was no response. Wondering if there was a title shocking enough to startle him awake, Anok found himself unconsciously pursing his lips in deep thought.

“Third Prince.”

He tried using the title the man might have been called in his early childhood.

“His Highness the Prince of Myeong.”

He even recited his full official title, yet Yeo Jae-won remained completely unmoving.

Why am I calling out to him so carefully, treating him like someone precious? This is the very man who drove me to utter misery in my dream and right before I collapsed. A sudden doubt crept into Anok’s mind.

At the same time, a vivid memory resurfaced from his youth—days spent living in a thatched cottage on the outskirts, where his grandmother would kick his backside to wake him in the morning while fiercely bellowing his full name.

There is no reason I cannot do the same.

Having made up his mind, Anok opened his eyes wide.

“Yeo Jae-won.”

“……Mm.”

In truth, had the man been in a truly deep sleep, he would not have heard his name being called at all. Moreover, how often did a member of the imperial family ever hear their own personal name spoken aloud? If anything, Anok should have worried that the unfamiliarity would cause him to ignore it entirely.

Yet as the saying goes, things rarely unfold as expected. The eyelids of the previously motionless Yeo Jae-won flickered open.

While Anok was asleep, Yeo Jae-won had tried his best to calmly quell the chaotic turmoil surging within his mind. However, a few critical questions remained that he could not answer on his own.

How much of the past does Anok actually remember?

He was far from ignorant. Setting aside how he might appear to others, he knew that to Anok, he had been a cold, unfeeling man.

Yet it was far too early to offer explanations. Without having fully recovered his past memories, he could not simply offer hollow excuses in a desperate attempt to keep Anok by his side.

Even so, Yeo Jae-won wanted to hold onto him. As his forgotten memories returned in scattered pieces, Yeo Jae-won finally understood why he had granted exceptions only to Anok all this time.

There was no way he hadn’t loved Anok—the very person for whom he had willingly surrendered his own life just to reset time and start over.

Had that not been the case, his heart could not possibly be hammering this violently against his chest at the mere sound of his three-character name falling from Anok’s lips.

Setting aside the questions he desperately wished to ask, Yeo Jae-won quietly waited for Anok to speak.

Anok—his face bearing a youthfulness slightly less mature than the version Yeo Jae-won had last seen in his memory—drew a short breath and tightly pressed his lips together.

Though he possessed the physical appearance of a twenty-year-old, the mind of the twenty-seven-year-old Anok was currently in utter disarray.

The man sitting before him was a noble royal. Though he possessed a personal name, his status was so exalted that it was virtually never spoken aloud, and it was a name destined to be shielded under imperial naming taboos in the future. To think he had blurted out such a name so recklessly—Anok felt as though the fever had driven him out of his mind.

Lost in those frantic thoughts, Anok’s eyes widened in surprise as the distance between them suddenly closed.

Touch.

The tips of their noses gently brushed against one another. The sensation of their skin meeting felt strange and surreal. It was the closest they had been since that day in the study.

“Why are you silent?”

“……Pardon?”

“You called me.”

It wasn’t as if he had called him with any specific business in mind. Anok leaned his body back slightly. The fleeting touch of their noses vanished in an instant, creating a comfortable gap between them once more.

“I merely woke you, as you appeared to be asleep.”

Lately, Yeo Jae-won’s attitude toward him had been completely unpredictable. This sudden tendency to close the distance between them was equally bewildering and unfamiliar.

Turning his head to avert his gaze and avoid looking at Yeo Jae-won, Anok flinched once more as a hand suddenly reached out toward him.

Extending his free hand, Yeo Jae-won pressed his palm gently against Anok’s forehead. He had allowed the youth to pull away only because he was confident in his ability to draw him close again.

“Your fever has completely broken.”

“……”

“Are you in pain anywhere else?”

His voice, slightly raspy, carried an undeniable trace of exhaustion. Hearing the concern clearly embedded in the question, Anok slowly shook his head. Even as he did so, he carefully observed Yeo Jae-won.

There was a subtle shift in the man’s demeanor toward him, yet it was difficult to pinpoint the exact reason behind it.

On the other hand, the prince looked thoroughly exhausted. Had he stayed awake by his bedside all night? Judging by the fact that Yeo Jae-won was asleep the moment Anok opened his eyes, he must have remained in the room the entire time.

Why……?

Anok could not erase the question from his mind. Though he knew Yeo Jae-won’s current behavior differed from that of his past life, these actions were truly inexplicable.

This version of Yeo Jae-won felt unfamiliar, as if Anok were witnessing a side of him he had never known. Fiddling nervously with the gold-embroidered silk quilt draped over his waist, Anok subtly shifted his body further back.

Though Yeo Jae-won had no desire to push someone who had just recovered from an illness, he could tell that Anok was still searching for any opportunity to slip away from him. Was he not already trying to distance himself, clearly uncomfortable with even the slightest closeness?

Yeo Jae-won refused to yield even the tiny gap Anok had created. Shifting from the chair, he sat directly on the edge of the bed and gazed intently at the youth.

“Anok.”

“……Yes.”

Hearing his name pronounced by Yeo Jae-won’s voice, Anok felt a wave of despair. It was merely the utterance of his name, yet a storm of complex emotions immediately began to stir within his heart.

By now, Yeo Jae-won was nearly certain of his conclusion: Anok remembered the events of their past life to some extent. Otherwise, there would be no reason for him to act so differently from how he had in the past.

Take Court Lady Jo’s matter, for instance. Had Court Lady Jo retained her memories of the past life, she would have served her true master—the Successor Empress of Gyoeong Palace—with unwavering loyalty, rather than dancing on the leash of Noble Consort Sa of Damyeon Palace. Though Yeo Jae-won’s memory of the throne’s succession battle remained hazy, no matter who emerged victorious, the position of the Successor Empress would have remained secure.

Thus, Court Lady Jo clearly had no recollection of the past, which explained why she had been manipulated so easily by Damyeon Palace.

Anok, on the other hand, was entirely different. Because he remembered the past, he had utilized every asset available in his current position to deftly dismantle Court Lady Jo.

Having reached that certainty, Yeo Jae-won was left to ponder how best to broach the subject. After a brief silence, he finally parted his lips and asked slowly:

“There is something I wish to ask you.”

“Pray speak, Your Highness.”

“The claim that you left a beloved paramour behind at the Baekya estate…… is there truly not a single grain of falsehood in those words?”

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