Chapter 27: Taken and left behind

What is it?

When did this geezer show up?

However, having experienced it before, I didn’t say anything this time.

Talking to someone who doesn’t appear on the camera screen would just make me look like I’m talking to myself, or saying random things to the viewers.

In reality, only my flustered expression was visible on the camera.

“You seem to be getting used to it.”

What am I getting used to?

To him suddenly appearing?

Or,

To being a woman?

Since I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t ask.

I had no choice but to silently listen to what this crazy old man had to say.

“Just a moment, stay quiet and still.”

“If you do, you will see the consequences of what you have taken and what you have discarded.”

Those few seconds I kept silent, distracted by this crazy old man.

During that time, something unexpected was happening in the chat window.

[What is that s*it?]

[Wow, are these the real simp bastards?]

[Unicorns are so f*cking disgusting lololol]

[Ew, so gross;;]

[Oh, that s*it came again]

[Hiro, why didn’t you ban him?]

[Get rid of the virgin fanatic]

[Pseudo-boyfriend, who the f*ck does he think he is lolololol]

[That’s what happens when you develop romantic feelings for a streamer lolololol]

Most of the viewers who came to my broadcast were those kinds of people.

People who come to watch the broadcast with the feeling of communicating with a celebrity.

People who come to see it because the art is pretty, the voice is nice.

People who are searching for hidden gems that only they know about.

And people who come to enjoy a pseudo-relationship with romantic feelings.

The last case is an unavoidable fate for streamers, and even more so for people who stand before the public.

Because they are people who make a living by gaining people’s favor, they had to endure people’s favor sometimes developing into romantic feelings.

Of course, since there is a perception that approaching a broadcaster with romantic feelings is not right, it is not well seen in large broadcasts…

Most broadcasters are just small fries.

That’s why small fries had to accept more direct and explicit emotions,
And in return, they received donations, which was the reality for many small-time broadcasters.

That was the same for me as well,
And I was accepting it because I had started broadcasting with a full understanding of the situation.

[Hey, where did the unicorn s*it go?]

[Typical simp) Runs away without even getting mad when insulted lololololol]

[The virgin s*it is acting like a pseudo-boyfriend lolololol]

[Ah, f*ck, refrain from splashing]

[lololololol He runs away after a 1,000 won punch, what is this lololol]

[That guy got permanently banned and kicked out lololololol]

[Wow lololol He couldn’t let go of his attachment after being banned and came crawling back, and all he does is a 1,000 won punch lolololol Is he a f*cking beggar lolololol]

That’s what it was like.

But many things had changed.

[Hiro’sBedFairy donated 1,000 won!!]

[They don’t even spend a thousand won themselves and call others beggars lololol Living with a sl*t in a trash dump for the rest of your lives, bye]

[lololol Mentally winning so hard lololol]

[Wow, is he really showing off with 2,000 won?]

[Thy dun evun spund uh thowsund won thumsuv lololololol]

[Change your nickname first, you idiot, can’t let go of your attachment lololol?]

[Hiro’sFootWiper donated 10,000 won!!]

[Yeah~ F*cking beggar, get lost~]

[BeniLope donated 100,000 won!!]

[A thousand won isn’t enough money to brag about…]

[OldManTwerkingMachineHiro donated 10,000 won!!]

[Thydun evun spund uh thowsund won thumsuv lololololol]

[ForbesSelectedMalangHiroChest donated 1,000 won!!]

[Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you Hiro nuna I love you]

The people who would normally swarm to me and demand an explanation
Today, they were instead tearing that person apart, calling him a virgin fanatic and a unicorn.

Because
The people who swarmed in today
Were just people who came for fun.

People who just wanted fun without any particular liking or affection for me.

Silently watching the spectacle unfolding before my eyes, one thought came to my mind.

If I hadn’t done something like net-kama from the start
If I had done a broadcast purely for fun instead of an emotional appeal broadcast

Would something have changed?

[? Nuna, why are you crying…]

[Hey, she’s crying because of the unicorn s*it]

[Nunaa… If nuna cries, I’ll cry too ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ]

[Nunaa ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ]

[Hiro, don’t cry;;]

[Crybaby Hiro is crying again…]

[It’s a waste of tears, let’s put them in a plastic bottle and sell them]

“Hey, why are you crying!”

“Just.”

“Thank you, everyone.”

“I’m just grateful.”

May desperately recited an excuse.

Perhaps it sounded plausible, as the people liked it.

The viewers who comforted her, the viewers who teased her, the viewers who wore masks and rode the waves.

Together with all those viewers,

My first broadcast flowed by.

[Follow chat has been disabled.]

“Have you finished cleaning up?”

As soon as I finished broadcasting, I heard a voice that was neither familiar nor unfamiliar.

“…Why did you come? You wouldn’t have come just to say you’re okay.”

I glared at the crazy old man.

It was only our second meeting, but it was enough to build distrust in me.

“You said you’d meet me again when that day comes, you said it so grandly, but you’re so late?”

Even at my blatant sarcasm, the crazy old man just chuckled.

“Didn’t I say I wouldn’t see you before that day came?”

“That’s just playing with words.”

“When you live long enough, you become proficient in jokes.”

Seeing the old man wriggle out of it like a slippery snake, I kept sighing.

Since he didn’t seem like he would tell me a proper story anyway, I sat down on the bed and listened to the old man’s story.

“So, how was it?”

“What do you mean? Becoming a woman? Or today’s broadcast?”

I asked back at the old man’s vague words.

Then the old man chuckled and hit his knee with his right hand.

Last time I saw him, he did that and brushed it off, saying he knew it all along.

Fortunately,
It was still vague, but an answer came back.

“I’m asking how your heart was.”

“My heart…?”

Heart.

It was a question that could be taken in many ways, but as I am now, there were a few things that came to mind.

But since the things that came to mind were questions that couldn’t be answered,
I answered the old man’s question with a question.

“If I hadn’t accepted your words that day, what would have happened to me?”

“What if I hadn’t lived like a net-kama in the first place?”

When I asked, the old man furrowed his brow.

“It’s not good to answer a question with a question. Moreover, it’s not like I know everything.”

“But.”

“I do know the answer, so I can’t not answer you.”

He scolded me, but it seemed like he was going to answer.

I straightened my hunched back and prepared to listen.

“If you had refused the choice I gave you, if you hadn’t gone that far in the first place… Is that what you want to know?”

“Yes.”

“There won’t be anything good to hear.”

“Even so.”

The old man narrowed his eyes as if examining my expression.

Then he closed his eyes and opened his mouth.

“If you hadn’t become a woman… It would have been as you thought.”

“…”

“Your broadcast would have ended that day, and some of those who had feelings for you and spent a lot of money on you would have tried to find you.”

Since most of your personal information had been revealed.

The old man added.

“However, even if you hadn’t lived that kind of life in the first place, your life wouldn’t have been so bright.”

“A life of barely making a living while paying off debt. At the end of that, you would have gone back to your parents and sponged off them, and then withered away without any meaning.”

“Don’t be too discouraged. At least you have parents to sponge off of, don’t you?”

At the old man’s words, I asked back.

“So… Was the choice I made the best choice after all?”

At my question defending myself,
The old man answered.

“It was the best.”

“For you, that is.”

I looked at the old man.

But the old man didn’t make eye contact with me.

“And it was the worst.”

“For the people who were deceived by you, that is.”

At the old man’s words,
I hastily blurted out.

“Then, was I supposed to live that kind of life?”

“A life of being chased by people and trembling in fear, or a life of sponging off my parents like trash and living like a parasite?”

“Or, should I have just died when my life was completely ruined by something that wasn’t even my fault?”

I added the words that the old man didn’t say and questioned him.

Was I a human being who was destined to live such an unhappy life?

Then the old man answered.

“What does that have to do with the people who were deceived by you?”

“Huh?”

“It means that it has nothing to do with them whether you live a trashy life or die.”

Unlike before,
The old man simply declared to me.

“The only important thing is.”

“You deceived them.”

“And they were deceived by you.”

I couldn’t say anything after hearing the old man’s words.

What should I say?

Deceiving other people
Taking their money
Making them have feelings for me

Was just a deed I committed to save myself.

“So.”

I ask the old man.

“What… What do you want me to do then?”

I seek an answer.

“Do you want me to repent now and tell people that I was actually a man?”

“Or do you want me to live as a woman and truly experience the hardships of being a woman that I falsely made up and said?”

“What do you want from me?”

“What… What do I have to do?”

At my question, the old man says.

“You have already paid the price.”

Saying that,

“So, just try to live hard.”

“If you do, you will know what price you paid.”

He presented it like this.

“I’ve already paid the price?”

“Yes, you’ve already experienced one.”

At those words,
I didn’t say anything.

“Child, you asked why I came here today.”

The old man threw something like a card at me.

“Uh, yeah??”

At the old man’s sudden action, I quickly snatched the card that was about to fall to the floor.

And when I looked at the card, it contained my appearance.

Not in Go Su-yeong’s body, but in my body.

“Since you have paid the price, consider it my own gift.”

When I heard those words and raised my head, the old man was already gone.