Chapter 31: A Past of Scars, a Present Confession

As I’ve mentioned before, Dragon Brother’s background was quite tragic. Her mother died during childbirth, leaving her behind. To make matters worse, her father was an alcoholic, constantly beating and scolding her throughout her childhood.

As far as I know, Dragon Brother ran away from home when she was quite young, around her early teens, and never returned.

Fortunately, her luck wasn’t entirely bad. A kind internet cafe owner took pity on her, offering her work in his shop for about a thousand yuan a month. To outsiders, he claimed she was his young niece.

After all, Dragon Brother was far too young at the time. Without such a pretense, the owner would have faced severe consequences for illegally employing child labor.

That owner never replaced her. By the time I met him, Dragon Brother had already been working as a network administrator at that internet cafe for three or four years.

She scraped by on a meager thousand yuan salary each month. Though it wasn’t much, it was enough to survive and avoid starvation.

However, this good fortune didn’t last. Two years ago, the owner was diagnosed with late-stage cirrhosis. He passed away before he could make proper arrangements for Dragon Brother.

The internet cafe was sold, and owners began to change every six months or so.

Dragon Brother was still underage then, but the new internet cafe owners were too lazy to find new staff. Seeing a ready-made administrator, they simply kept her on.

To the public, they claimed she was their ‘godson’ – a fact Dragon Brother’s rivals often used to mock her, saying she had ‘several fathers’ and that her ‘mother died early.’ They would hurl whatever insults they could think of.

A while ago, Dragon Brother offended someone. This particular owner was quite timid and feared a disturbance at the internet cafe. Consequently, he summarily dismissed Dragon Brother.

Thus, she ‘gloriously’ became unemployed, and with only a middle school education at that.

Looking back at Dragon Brother’s early life, it had been a harrowing and utterly tragic journey.

Psychology posits that a person’s character throughout their life is shaped by their childhood experiences.

In other words, every scar from childhood can become a latent danger in the future.

To put it more poetically, the wounds sustained in childhood transform into a deep-seated scar in one’s heart, one that can never truly heal.

I recall a story about a person who absolutely loved dragon fruit, consuming several every day. When asked why, he couldn’t explain it himself. He would simply scratch his head, smile, and say he just had a strong craving for it.

Later, by a strange twist of fate, he developed depression. A psychologist hypnotized him, and it was then discovered that his intense love for dragon fruit stemmed from a particular childhood experience.

As a child, he had never seen a dragon fruit before. Standing by a stall, he longed to buy one and taste it, but his father refused.

Despite passing the stall several times afterward, and the young boy pleading repeatedly, his stingy father never bought him one.

Over time, the child eventually forgot about the dragon fruit incident.

However, once he became an adult, found work, and gained financial independence, he developed an insatiable desire for dragon fruit.

This was because the boy who once stood by the fruit stall, desperately wanting to taste a dragon fruit, was eventually forgotten by his adult self, yet his longing transformed into a deeply buried scar in his heart.

Dragon Brother was much the same. If anyone else had endured her life, they might have been utterly crushed by fate, never recovering.

Yet, Dragon Brother was incredibly resilient. She seemingly didn’t care, and despite being riddled with countless wounds, she had persevered to this day.

However, those childhood scars remained firmly etched upon her, showing no signs of healing.

Her interactions with others clearly revealed this. Dragon Brother would typically speak whatever came to mind, and if she disliked someone, she wouldn’t hesitate to ‘step on them’ metaphorically.

If she deemed someone trustworthy, she would develop an intense dependency on them, coupled with a particularly strong possessiveness.

Should a conflict arise with someone close to her, she would become utterly helpless, even hysterical. Beneath that fierce, clawing facade, she was merely a timid, insecure child.

While I understood this in my heart, seeing Dragon Brother’s tears still left me feeling somewhat at a loss.

Dragon Brother stood before me, trembling uncontrollably, her teeth clenched. A trace of hatred marred her face as tears streamed down her cheeks.

For a moment, I was speechless, unsure of what to say.

Dragon Brother seemed to notice a liquid tracing her face. Disbelieving, she raised a wrist to wipe her cheek. When she felt the tears, she froze, then lifted her head and stared at me blankly.

After a moment, she suddenly turned and rushed back into her room.

I was left alone in the living room.

I stood there for a short while, then let out a bitter laugh and headed towards Dragon Brother’s room.

Dragon Brother’s room was dim, the curtains drawn. It remained as messy as ever. Three empty cans, overflowing with cigarette butts, sat on her computer desk.

The clothes I had bought her earlier were piled in the left corner, and the basketball tracksuit I’d outgrown was tucked under the desk, its sleeves peeking out.

Sighing at the disarray, I turned my gaze to the bed. The bedding was also disheveled, and atop it, a bundled quilt was trembling.

I sat on the edge of the bed, patted the quilt, and softly asked, “Why are you still crying?”

The quilt remained silent for a long moment, revealing only a wisp of white hair that continued to tremble slightly.

A muffled, tearful voice emerged from within the quilt: “Old Lu… I’ve become so strange ever since I turned into a woman…”

I sighed, reaching out to pull back the quilt. “You were always a bit strange,” I said softly. “I’m used to it.”

I intended to completely pull back the quilt, but Dragon Brother tugged fiercely from inside. I only managed to lift the lower half.

Beneath, a familiar pair of white panties was revealed, and two fair legs were pressed together, their arches tensed, trembling faintly.

Dragon Brother pressed the quilt tightly over her face, her voice trembling. “Don’t… wait a moment, don’t look at me yet…”

‘Don’t look at what?’ I thought. ‘I’ve pretty much seen everything there is to see anyway.’ With a firm pull, I yanked the quilt away. “What’s the big deal about looking at you? Get up!”

I pulled the quilt completely off, revealing Dragon Brother underneath.

Dragon Brother’s small, panicked face was still streaked with tears. Her large eyes were wet and bloodshot, and her hands were held flat against her chest, still frozen in the pose of clutching the quilt.

After I pulled the quilt away, she froze for a moment, then covered her face with her hands, gritting her teeth as she choked out, “Are you crazy? I told you not to look…”

I sighed inwardly, resolving to be direct. I tossed the quilt aside, then took hold of her slender arms, pressing her hands onto the pillow.

Meeting her panicked gaze, I said earnestly, “Look at me.”

She averted her head, her shoulders trembling continuously. After a long pause, seeing that I made no further move, she slightly turned her head back.

I looked into her eyes again and said seriously, “My earlier talk about going on a date with a girl was purely to tease you.”

The room fell silent for a long moment.

Dragon Brother’s wet eyes fixed on me for a while. Then, in a soft voice, she asked, “Then what about **?”

Under the gaze of those moist eyes, I felt an inexplicable heat rising within me. Forcing it down, I said softly, “Dating girls was just teasing you. Doing ** is for fooling idiots.”

Dragon Brother, her eyes still tear-streaked, looked at me earnestly. “Lu Ren, I’m going to ** your mom.”

I sighed, releasing Dragon Brother’s arms and wiping the tears from her face. I said softly, “You don’t have the necessary equipment for that.”

The moment my hand touched Dragon Brother’s face, she instinctively pressed her hand over mine, glancing away awkwardly. She swallowed, then said, “Actually, anyway, I’ve seen it online… those who look ‘pure’ are usually not good sorts…”

I remained seated on the bed, silent.

Dragon Brother wrapped both hands around my arm, her recently tear-filled eyes still glistening. Her gaze darted everywhere but at me.

Having just wrestled with the quilt, and given her habit of not wearing a bra at home, a large expanse of fair skin was exposed on her chest. The heat within me intensified, and I swallowed, yet sighed inwardly.

In truth, a question had been suppressed in my heart for far too long, aching to be spoken. I resolved to voice it today.

I looked intently at Dragon Brother’s face, knowing I would instantly catch any hint of an unusual expression. Then, I suddenly asked:

“Bai Hailong, do you like me?”

Dragon Brother, still holding my hand, paused at my question. After a moment’s thought, she replied quite frankly:

“Yes, I do.”

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