Episode 80 Behind the Scenes (2)

“…Why bother?”

That was the first thing that came out of my mouth.

I could understand if she said that after watching other broadcasts, but she said she thought about starting a broadcast after watching mine?

Seriously, why?

Yujin unnie next to me didn’t think much differently, but she was just giving an awkward smile.

“Well… should we go to a cafe to talk first?”
“Yeah… It’s September, but it’s still damn hot, really….”

Even on the way to the cafe following Yujin unnie, my head was full of the word ‘why?’

I was also bothered by the fact that she was following slightly behind me and Yujin unnie.

‘It doesn’t seem like she’s that close to Yujin unnie.’

If she were close to Yujin unnie, wouldn’t she be standing next to Yujin unnie instead of following behind like that?

It’s not like the road is narrow or there are a lot of pedestrians so we have to make way.

If there were other people, it would be natural to split into pairs, but it’s weird to have this kind of structure when there are three of us.

Is she even really my fan?

As I was talking to Yujin unnie with that doubt in my mind, I arrived at the cafe before I knew it.

“I’ll order first, Hiro, the usual?

What about you, Yeseul?”
“Yes, I’ll have an Americano.”
“I’ll have a cappuccino, please!”

Yujin unnie awkwardly left her seat, and only the two of us, me and a friend named Yeseul, were left facing each other at the table.

“….”

No, we weren’t facing each other.

She’s avoiding my eyes.

My suspicion is slowly turning into certainty.

She doesn’t know me well, and she’s not that interested in me.

She just wants to broadcast, but she doesn’t have anyone to ask, and she probably heard that an acquaintance of her mom’s acquaintance is a broadcaster, so she made up an excuse and asked to be introduced.

I’m not particularly upset, but this is a problem.

“Um… is there something on my face?”

She won’t be able to say a word until I talk to her.

She doesn’t know much about me, and if she makes something up and says the wrong thing, her favorability will plummet, so she’ll be careful about what to say.

If you’re going to be shrewd, you should have done more research.

Well…

I could just wait for Yujin unnie to mediate, but

“So, you want to try broadcasting?”

I didn’t want Yujin unnie to worry unnecessarily, so I decided to talk to her first.

“Yes, um… yes!”

I’ll just be a little annoyed.

But if we talk a little, wouldn’t I be able to give her some advice?

With that in mind, I threw out questions one by one.

“But why broadcast?

Why bother?”
“Ah!

Well… I’ve been watching internet broadcasts a lot since I was a student, so I wanted to try broadcasting too!”

…?

You’re still a student, you idiot.

“Who do you usually watch?”
“Ah, I watched Manyong!”

Yeah, Manyong.

First of all, she doesn’t turn on her camera.

“I watch Gihyun!”

He’s a male streamer.

“I watch Puria!”

She’s a virtual YouTuber.

….

But I’m a female streamer?

Why did you really come to me?

She doesn’t even know that I’m a female streamer, does she?

I suddenly felt like my recent migraine was going to recur, but I held it down and spoke again.

“Um, Yeseul…ssi?”
“Ah, yes.
Can I call you Hiro-nim?”

“Yeah… well, call me whatever you’re comfortable with.
What kind of broadcast do you want to do?”

“I’m thinking of doing virtual like Puria-nim!
It’s trending these days.”

No
That’s
F*ck
No
…Sigh, whatever.

“I see… virtual, yeah.”
“Ah, do you… not like otaku things?”
“No, I’m an otaku too, so it’s not like that.”
“Ah~ that’s a relief, I was worried about saying something if you didn’t like that.”

You’re not even trying to hide that you’re not my fan, are you?

Maybe it’s because she’s still young, but every action is clumsy.

I can see that she’s trying to trick me and take advantage of me, but it’s so obvious.

I’m not a saint, so I’m not going to say that I shouldn’t do that, but if I just let her do what she wants,
she’ll end up getting criticized and buried for being clumsy, or she’ll just quit broadcasting without a sound.

Is it okay to let her go like this?

“Here’s your Americano~”
“Ah, thank you, unnie.”
“And here’s your cappuccino~”
“Ah, thank you, Yujin unnie!”

While I was wondering what to do with her, Yujin unnie brought the coffee.

“Did you talk to Yeseul a little?”
“…Sigh.”
“Suyeong-ah?”
“What should I do with her?”
“Yes, yes?

What??”

Yeseul couldn’t hide her embarrassment, not expecting my reaction at all.

But it’s ridiculous to choose my words carefully with someone like her, right?

“Yeseul-ssi, can I speak comfortably?”
“Yes?

Ah, yes… you can speak comfortably….”
“Okay, Yeseul-ah.

Why did you come to me?”
“Huh?”
“You want to do virtual, and you watch broadcasts like durahan, virtual, and male streams, but is it right to come to me, a female streamer, to ask for advice?”
“Ah, well… I thought I could get advice since you’re a streamer—”
“Yujin unnie sitting next to you is also a streamer, you know?”
“Ah?”

What ah, ah my ass.

Are you crazy?

“Wait, Suyeong-ah, let’s calm down, calm down first.

Okay?”

Ah, I said it out loud.

“Anyway… don’t try to be smart and just tell me honestly, okay?”
“Yes, yes….”
“Honestly, you’re not my fan, are you?”
“…Yes.”
“Then I’ll just think of it as a Q&A and talk to you.

Got it?”
“Yes….”

Sigh, how did I end up counseling someone I don’t even know?

Still, now that it’s come to this,

“First, I’ll ask you this.

Are you going to broadcast as a hobby, or do you really plan to make it a career?”
“Ah!

I’m going to do it as a hobby while going to college, but I’m going to do it seriously!

Really!”
“Suyeong-ah!!!

Calm down, just a second!!!”

No, unnie, if you’re going to broadcast as a hobby, then do it as a hobby, and if you’re going to do it as a career seriously, then do it as a career, but you’re trying to do both, what the f*ck?

Should I kill her?

“Phew….

Um, Yeseul-ssi?”

Still, I’ll just endure it one more time for Yujin unnie’s sake.

As I suppressed the rising anger and called Yeseul, Yeseul didn’t even answer and just looked at me with a tense expression.

I organized my thoughts for a moment and

“Should I ask the question more clearly again?”

I asked, choosing my words as carefully as possible.

“I’m asking you to tell me whether you’re going to continue broadcasting with a separate main job even if the broadcast is successful, or whether you’re thinking of making broadcasting your full-time job if the broadcast is successful.”
“Um… if it goes well, I’ll do it full-time—”
“Are you going to drop out, of college.”
“Huh?”
“Hiro-ya?”

‘Drop out’

Yeseul froze as soon as she heard those two words.

It can’t be helped.

She’s just finished middle school and high school, and she’s about to start college with her parents’ money, so there’s no way she can easily say the word ‘drop out’.

She’s an adult in name only, but twenty years old is still too young to take responsibility for herself.

But doing ‘broadcasting’ as a ‘full-time job’ has more weight than ‘dropping out’.

Of course, it’s true that the entry barrier is lower than starting a business or being self-employed.

It doesn’t require a large sum of money as start-up costs, or starting with a loan.

In fact, it’s not uncommon to use family money as well.

It’s also true that the risk is relatively low.

If you fail in starting a business, you’ll be left with a huge debt, and it’s common for your family and people around you to be affected, but

Even if you fail in internet broadcasting, it’s rare for your life and the lives of those around you to be ruined to the point where you can’t get back up.

But

None of it can be recognized as experience

Unless you become a star brighter than anyone else, even if you achieve some success, you’ll be looked at with prejudiced eyes

It’s not even recognized as a proper business, so it’s difficult to get national support or use financial services

Even a hasty remark that would have been trivial in private remains on the internet as an indelible mark

To make such an unpredictable place

Even if things go well, to make such a quagmire with an uncertain future

Your home?

There are only two kinds of people who do that.

An idiot.

“…Drop out!

I’ll do it if the broadcast goes well!!”

Or a f*cking idiot.

“You’re more of an idiot than I imagined?”
“Yes?!”

She’s shrewd

She’s greedy

And yet she’s clumsy

And even an idiot

“Still, it’s good to be this stupid if you’re going to broadcast.”

I saw a bit of potential.

“Yes?

I’m going to a pretty good college, even if it’s not SKY level…?”
“It’s stupid to get into that good college and then drop out if the broadcast goes well, you idiot.”
“Ah.”
“What ah, ah my ass, ah I love it.”

If she’s this stupid, it might be worth trying.

I was going to tell her not to broadcast if she seemed normal.