Chapter 19: The Price of ‘Kindness’

One male cultivator remarked, “Brother, I managed to gather 2,000 Immortal Crystals this time! How about you? How much did you find?”

“I collected 20,000 Immortal Crystals!” another cultivator declared.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, 20,000 Immortal Crystals! My high-grade Immortal Crystals suddenly feel utterly insignificant!” The first cultivator grinned.

“What good is having so much money?” the other cultivator scoffed, pursing his lips. “If you lose, won’t it just be obediently snatched away?”

“Hahahaha…” The cultivator burst into laughter.

They continued to chat idly, sipping from their water.

It was at that moment, however, that an unexpected change swept over them.

Before long, both cultivators felt an intense heat coursing through their bodies, their ‘second brothers’ (TL Note: A Chinese euphemism for the male genitalia, literally ‘second brother’) swelling uncontrollably, and their gazes toward each other grew increasingly hazy.

Driven by an unknown urge, they reached out and grabbed at one another.

And then… they began to tear at each other’s clothes.

“What’s happening? Why is my face burning so red?” one cultivator muttered to himself, bewildered.

Yet, he soon found himself utterly incapable of coherent thought.

For…

He was simply too consumed by an insatiable, burning desire.

The other cultivator, however, remained comparatively calmer, though he glared furiously at his companion, exclaiming, “Damn it… we’ve been poisoned!”

“Who the hell poisoned us…?” the cultivator roared, his voice laced with indignation.

Glancing at the river water, both men immediately realized that someone had laced their drink.

Just then, two female cultivators approached the riverbank, intending to draw water for themselves.

The two men, whose clothes had already been torn to shreds in their frenzied state, lunged forward as if they had sighted their saviors.

They pounced on the two female cultivators.

“Ah, what are you doing?!” both female cultivators shrieked.

The two male cultivators quickly overpowered one of the women.

One of the female cultivators was dragged into the water.

Meanwhile, the other female cultivator screamed in terror.

Despite her struggles, she was utterly unable to break free and was soon pulled into the water herself.

“Wuwuwu, help me…!”

Soon, the sounds of desperate sobbing filled the air.

This woman, too, met the same tragic fate; her clothes were ripped, and numerous wounds began to appear on her body.

“You vile scum, how dare you commit such despicable acts!”

Just then, a thunderous roar ripped through the sky, and Xian Yuan made a dazzling entrance, immediately plucking all four individuals from the river.

However, since the river water contained the “man-making-madness” (TL Note: A potent aphrodisiac that causes intense lust) drug, both women’s faces were flushed crimson, their legs clamped tightly together, their eyes brimming with burgeoning desire, and their immortal gowns tattered beyond repair, revealing glimpses of their fair skin.

“You two lecherous wolves! Today, I, Xian Yuan, shall act on behalf of Heaven to execute justice!”

No sooner had her words fallen than—

Two bursts of blood blossomed in the air, and, naturally, two severed appendages fluttered away on the wind.

“Aaaahhh!!!”

Both male cultivators instantly let out heart-wrenching screams of agony.

“I am very kind,” she announced, “helping you break free from the drug’s effects.”

Xian Yuan gazed at the two ‘living eunuchs’ with a sly smirk. “I’ve already treated you,” she said. “Aren’t you going to give me some medical fees?!”

[b*tch!]

The two male cultivators were not fools; they instantly understood what had happened. Who else but her could have administered the drug?

“Why won’t you pay up! I was a guiding light, leading you out of a sea of suffering, yet you refuse to pay! You’re utterly dishonorable!”

Xian Yuan acted as if possessed by a drama queen, yet her hands were far from idle. In a flash, she executed the Flying Cloud-Seeking Hand technique. The very next moment, two spatial rings appeared in her grasp.

“How generous of you two esteemed patrons!” Xian Yuan exclaimed. “To offer your spatial rings as payment for my services—you are truly great philanthropists!”

Xian Yuan pocketed both spatial rings.

“You motherf—!”

“You wretched slut! May your ancestors be defiled…!”

The two male cultivators cursed her through gritted teeth, yet their vitriol had not the slightest effect.

Xian Yuan’s greatest virtues, it seemed, were her thick skin and utter shamelessness.

“Many thanks for your profound ‘love,’ fellow Daoists,” Xian Yuan replied sweetly. “However, I don’t recall having an ancestor named ‘wretched slut,’ so I fear you’ve mistaken me for someone else.”

“You—!”

Unprepared for Xian Yuan’s boundless shamelessness, the two male cultivators were instantly overwhelmed by rage and simply fainted.

“Alas,” Xian Yuan sighed, “you two must have been deeply wronged by that woman you called ‘wretched slut.’ I shall mourn for your misfortune.”

Xian Yuan bowed slightly towards the unconscious men, then turned to the two female cultivators, a smile gracing her lips. “Ladies,” she offered, “do you require an antidote?”

“Tell us,” one of the women spoke, “what are your demands?”

One of the female cultivators bit her lip lightly; having witnessed the entire process, she knew full well that it was the girl before them who had administered the drug.

“This sister truly understands the way,” Xian Yuan chuckled.

Xian Yuan slapped her thigh, pulled out a calculator, and began tapping away. Then she announced, “One antidote will cost three billion Immortal Crystals!”

“Are you trying to rob us?!”

The female cultivator in the yellow immortal gown watched Xian Yuan, fuming with rage. What kind of damned antidote could possibly cost three billion Immortal Crystals? Even their entire sect might not be able to produce such a sum!

“Not so!”

Xian Yuan wiggled her fingers. “This antidote, you see, requires thousand-year Ganoderma, sword grass…”

Xian Yuan rattled off a long list of ingredients, detailing numerous miraculous elixirs and rare herbs, but to the two female cultivators, it was nothing but blatant extortion.

“Five thousand Immortal Crystals per antidote!” the female cultivator in the yellow gown declared through gritted teeth.