Chapter 184: No Longer Good Brothers

Sizzle—

The fatty-and-lean lamb skewers crackled over the charcoal fire, oil dripping as the aroma of cumin and chili powder spread through the night.

One had to admit it—
being a magical girl really was a good job.

At least, if you only looked at the number printed on the payslip, this was absolutely the highest ceiling Lin Yu would ever touch in her lifetime.

Just like what her mom used to nag about on the phone:

“Son, when are you going to find a proper, decent job? That so-and-so from your Second Aunt’s family next door—he studied less than you, and now he’s already driving an Audi…”

In an age that mocks poverty but not prostitution, salary and benefits are the only yardstick of dignity.

So even though the content of this job was filled with shame—even though it meant wearing lace-trimmed skirts and wrestling tentacle monsters—Lin Yu still clenched her teeth and accepted it.

But…

Whenever night fell, whenever he took off his disguise in his rented room and listened to the rain outside the window, that thought would always crawl out like a rat from a gutter—

“If… I could find a normal job, would that be better?”

Then he could stand up straight and tell his parents what he did for a living.
He could attend class reunions openly, instead of hiding in a corner…

And he wouldn’t have to…

When facing Luo Shaotian—this blazing sun—feel like a piece of trash who would sell anything for money…

“Stop thinking nonsense.”

A low voice suddenly interrupted Lin Yu’s self-pity.

“…Huh?”

Lin Yu looked up and saw Luo Shaotian handing her a can of milk beer.

“A-Yu, look over there.”

Luo Shaotian raised his hand and pointed to a busy figure not far away.

It was the waiter from earlier, the one wearing the white cap.

He looked very young—maybe just around twenty.

At the moment, he was carrying a heavy tray, weaving through the tightly packed tables and chairs.

“Look at that waiter,”

Luo Shaotian’s gaze was calm and deep.

“He has to be at the shop at eight every morning. He faces grease and noise, walks tens of thousands of steps a day in this narrow aisle. When customers give him a hard time, no matter how wronged he feels inside, he still has to swallow it and put on a smile.”

“He’s also a person. He has a self, and he has dignity. But for the sake of living, for those few thousand yuan of wages, he has no choice but to cut off a part of his dignity and exchange it.”

Luo Shaotian turned to look at Lin Yu.

“Do you think… making compromises like this just to survive is something shameful?”

Lin Yu reflexively retorted:

“They’re earning a living with their own abilities. It’s not stealing or robbing—”

Then what about you?
Me?
Right—did you steal or rob?
……

Lin Yu fell silent.

Luo Shaotian picked up another can of milk beer for himself.

Click.

He pulled the tab, and white foam spilled out.

“No matter whether it’s that waiter, or you. You’re all willing to sacrifice a part of yourselves for your own lives, for your families…”

“You’re the same as everyone else in this city who’s struggling to live. You’re all living with all your strength—and truly contributing something to this city.”

……

Lin Yu curled her lips.

“Tch… that sure sounds nice. But it’s all just grand, high-sounding rhetoric.”

“It does sound a bit grand,”

Luo Shaotian smiled. His eyes softened slightly.

“But…”

“A-Yu, do you know Immanuel Kant?”

“A German?”

“Huh? Kant?”

Lin Yu frowned, rummaging through the classes she’d taken over the years.

“Never heard of him. The Germans I know are just three—Marx, Engels… oh right, and that Hitler guy.”

“Pfft—”

Luo Shaotian almost choked on his milk beer. He shook his head helplessly.

“He was a philosopher. In Groundwork of the Metaphysics of Morals, he said something very famous—human beings are ends.”

“Huh? Ends?”

“The wording’s a bit awkward because of translation, but you can understand it like this…”

“Human beings are the final destination of all value. Existence itself is their meaning—not a tool to achieve some other goal.”

“Whether you become a magical girl, or you turn into Lulu, or even if you wear skirts for money…”

“Those are all just means.”

“But that Lin Yu who’s desperately living, who wants to take good care of his family…”

“That Lin Yu who, even after becoming a girl, will still stand in front of others at moments of danger…”

“That soul itself is the most valuable thing of all—

an end.”

“So…”

Luo Shaotian raised the milk beer in his hand, gave it a little shake toward Lin Yu, and smiled with quiet relief.

“Stop thinking of yourself as trash, A-Yu.”

“You’re a tough guy… fighting just to live.”

……

Lin Yu froze.

She even forgot to drink the milk beer she’d lifted to her lips.

Her breathing suddenly became rapid, her head feeling thick and muddled, like it had been filled with paste.

Damn it.

What’s going on?

Did she catch a cold from the draft earlier?

Or was the alcohol content of this milk beer too high, making her lightheaded?

That couldn’t be right—this stuff doesn’t even have alcohol…

Seriously.

I really shouldn’t have been greedy and agreed to come out for barbecue with this guy.

This “breakup meal”…

It’s way too upsetting.

All this weird nonsense.

Isn’t he just someone who read a few more crappy books than me?

Why’s he dragging German philosophy into this?

Are those foreign devil theories really that useful?

Just flashy tricks!

Stop talking already.

Did that Kant guy really say that?

Could it be something he just made up on the spot to comfort me?

Like when we were kids writing essays—padding the word count to scam points, casually throwing in “Wozji·Shuode once said…” and then following it with a paragraph of pseudo-profound but actually meaningless nonsense to show off.

But…

…

Lin Yu secretly glanced at Luo Shaotian’s serious face.

This guy… doesn’t look like the type who’d lie about something like this.

And…

Hate to admit it…

Those words did sound… pretty convincing.

“Human beings are ends…”

The phrase circled in Lin Yu’s mind, like a pair of gentle hands softly smoothing out the self-loathing that had tormented her for so long.

So that means…

I’m not trash?

I’m not some clown who sold his soul for money?

I’m also someone who’s really trying?

I didn’t disgrace Mom and Dad?

I didn’t…

“Eh…?”

Why did her vision suddenly get blurry?

Like looking through a thick pane of frosted glass—
even Luo Shaotian in front of her had turned into a swaying patch of light.

This is…

Tears?

Don’t be ridiculous!

I’m Lin Yu!

The kind of pure, manly guy who can get chewed out bloody by Manager Qian and still laugh it off!

How could I possibly cry over a bit of chicken-soup talk—

Oh, right!

It’s because I transformed! I transformed!

This magical-girl body… damn it!

Soft and weak!

I hate it! I hate it! I hate it!

Why won’t this body listen to me?!

A woman’s body is just too—

“A-Yu? Why are you… crying?”

“Bullshit!”

Lin Yu jerked up her arm and viciously wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, biting her lip, her voice hoarse.

“Who… who’s crying?! This is—this is from the smoke!”

“This crappy barbecue joint… the ventilation’s terrible! It got in my damn eyes!”

I’m not crying.

Absolutely not.

As long as I wipe away this damn moisture, wipe away these traces of weakness…

I’ll still be that carefree Lin Yu!

“Don’t move.”

A warm voice suddenly sounded by her ear.

Much closer than before.

So close that… she could even feel the warmth of his breath.

Lin Yu instinctively tried to dodge, but found that handsome face already right in front of her.

Sharp, well-defined features.
A high nose bridge.
Eyes as deep as the sea…

So unfair.

This is what I wanted to grow into.
This is what a man is supposed to look like.

A soft tissue gently covered the corner of her eye.

That large, well-defined hand—
now unbelievably gentle—carefully wiped away the tears she couldn’t stop.

“Damn it…”

Lin Yu clenched her fists tightly, nails digging deep into her flesh.

Why are you doing this?

Why are you being so gentle to me?

When you’d already… said things so absolutely.

“Why…”

She gritted her teeth, her voice trembling with unwillingness and confusion.

“Why go this far?”

“I lied to you so badly… treated you like a fool…”

“We… shouldn’t be able to go back to being that kind of… best brothers who talk about everything, right?”

Luo Shaotian’s movements paused slightly.

He opened his mouth, his throat tight.

“Then… let’s not be sworn brothers.”

His voice was as light as smoke, yet like the fire in a grill, it burned straight into the heart.

“Let’s… be good friends.”

“Thump—”

Eh?

What was that sound?

It feels like…

Annoying…

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